by Abra Ebner
I took a deep breath, “You mean, after that day in the woods when I followed you?”
She nodded.
I let out a sharp laugh, “Well, I wish you wouldn’t have made me chase you.” I raised my eyebrows at her.
She shrugged, her face twisted into an innocent grimace.
I snorted. “Don’t act so innocent,” I shook my head.
Her face now looked shocked and accused.
I laughed, putting my hand on hers, “I was just kidding!”
Margriete exhaled in relief, grabbing her heart for dramatic effect. “I… should…have guessed,” she paused to swallow, “Jokester.” A smile crept across her face.
I giggled. “So do I seem the same, you know, as I used to be?”
She shook her head yes, her eyes bulged and serious.
“Really, so then I don’t seem at all different? Because you do know how I ended up leaving this life right?” my eyes searched hers, wondering what she could know about what had happened.
She rolled her eyes, craning her neck to prepare for speech. She was getting better alarmingly fast. “I saw it…happen,” her eyes became grave, “I know where…you went…I had been there.”
I paused, my heart rate surging with the thought. “You knew where I was, while I was dead?” My mind rested in a selfish place, a place where I could find Edgar.
She shook her head no, but then became flustered and shook her head yes. “Yes, but no…you weren’t ever…dead…”
“What do you mean?” I shot back before she was able to finish.
“You… were caged…” She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, “asleep.” She scooted closer to me and I could see she was attempting to be secretive, but with Sam, it was no use. Her voice was hoarse as it left her lips, “You can only die… if you are stabbed by the dagger of the gods, which Matthew had… stolen.” She swallowed hard, “But… I really believe it was bestowed to him by the gods themselves… another pawn in their game… against us.”
I looked at her in astonishment, finding her speech nearly normal other than the occasional drag of hesitation in her throat. “The dagger,” I whispered. “But…” my face twisted, “I have it.”
She gasped at my words, coughing as the breath tickled her throat. “You do?”
I gave her a solemn nod.
Excitement filled her eyes, “If you have it, then we can use that against them.”
“Against who?” I asked, finding the story now lost.
She narrowed her eyes at me, confused by my comment, “You don’t know?”
I shook my head.
“Edgar must not have told you,” she coughed hard, phlegm releasing in her ancient throat.
I winced.
She continued, “The gods…”
I cut her off, “I know about the gods, and how we got here, but I never knew about the dagger.”
She shook her head, “But do you know about how the gods made the dagger, and what it does?”
I shrugged.
She smiled to herself, as though content with the secret knowledge she possessed. “Well the dagger kills us. But, it can also kill them. It’s said that whoever rids the earth of our kind, is then worthy enough to challenge for a seat among the gods. The gods are threatened by us, because though they created our kind, they made us better than themselves. They’re jealous, and scared.”
I blinked a few times as I let the information process. “But how did Matthew get it?” My voice was now a low murmur, to match hers.
“They gave it to him, because they knew he had enough rage and hate to kill us all, but was also weak enough, that he would never win over them. He was set up to fail.” Margriete sighed, and a small smile crept across her face. “Matthew wasn’t always how you know him today. He was once handsome and kind and he loved me so much. There was never a glimmer of evil in his beautiful silvery eyes, not until…” Her face changed suddenly, “I remember the day, the hushed voices from the room below me. I knew, but no one ever believed me. Except you Elle, you always did.”
I watched as her eyes began to well with tears.
“You believed me. But Edgar silenced you rather quickly.”
The ring on my chest suddenly breathed hard against my skin, as though reacting to the comment in a negative fashion.
“When I found out what was going on, I went to the gods. It took me months to find where they hid, and to you, I was already dead. It pained me to do that, but I knew I had to, it was my fault that I had allowed my other half to become so naive and gullible, I knew it was my job to fix it.” A violent cough silenced her.
I handed her another cup of water that was sitting on the coffee table.
She took a heavy sip, allowing it to trickle down her throat. “But the gods laughed at my feeble attempts, and cursed me to roam the earth as a cat until the day someone cared enough to utter my name, as you did. I am forever stripped of my ability to fly, and the life of the raven has left me. In that form of the cat, they knew that Matthew would eventually find me, knowing he hadn’t yet taken my soul but as time dragged on, I think he gave up.” She set the cup back on the table. “All of it, it was all a sick game.”
I looked into my hands. “No wonder I hate Monopoly,” I whispered under my breath, remembering Scott and Sarah.
She laughed, hearing what I had said.
I smiled. “But now that we have the dagger, we have the power, right? And all that is left is you and I?”
She shook her head, “I’m not sure, like I said, I think Edgar survived. For whatever reason, I think they’d keep him alive. After all, he would be the last male half.”
I grabbed the ring in my hand, twisting the warm metal through my fingers.
Margriete continued to speak, her voice changing from gruff, to nearly melodic. “I’m not sure what their motives are, I always believed it was to rid us from this earth, but now, I don’t see the rationality in that. We have the dagger, but it’s no use to us if we kill them, but perhaps there’s a way to bargain with them. If it’s true that whoever holds the dagger has a rightful chance on the throne of the gods, I’m sure they’re not going to want to have that falling into the wrong hands. There are many creatures that roam this earth, creatures that aren’t natural here. The gods have allowed too much vulnerability, and I’m sure they’re nervous that we’ve got it. Perhaps…”
She trailed off, her eyes glazing over in revelation. I sat up straight as an arrow, anxious to hear what she had to say.
“That’s exactly what it is!” she gasped. “They want you to bring it back to them. They know you have it, so they’ve taken Edgar as collateral.”
My heart leapt. Yes! It made sense. I suddenly couldn’t help but hold back my happiness and I gave her a huge hug, squeezing the breath from her lungs as she winced under my grasp. I let go of her as she fell back, her body crushed by my excitement.
I slapped my hands against the leather of the couch. “So all we have to do is bring it to them!” I yelped with excitement.
She snorted and rolled her eyes, mocking me. “It’s not that easy, getting there is a whole other story. It’s not like you can walk up to the god’s front doorstep and ring the doorbell, or catch the next bus at the station. If that were true, could you imagine how many religions would fight over that property, over that bus?”
I laughed. “Well then where is it?” I furled my brow.
She shrugged, “Jerusalem.”
I laughed, “Yeah right, you’re joking.”
She smiled, “Yeah okay you’re right. I was joking.”
I gave her a playful punch on the arm as we both rolled back in laughter.
She caught her breath before going on. “It’s everywhere Elle,” she put her hands in the air and waved them around like a hippy at a Santana concert. “But the hard part is your mind creates it. Whatever your deepest fears, whatever your darkest memories are, will be shown to you there. You have to be strong for this, and you have to be prepared to see thi
ngs from your past, all things, even if your mind can’t remember.” She shuddered, recalling her own experience. “And you have to expect that in their defense, they will play on all those cords. They will use all the things that could ever drive you mad, scared, and even suicidal.”
I exhaled, “I can do this. We have to.”
Margriete grasped my hand, “They will stop at nothing to destroy you before you reach them, to get the dagger from you before having to give up Edgar.” Her eyes were stormy and hard. “And after all, they will assume we are coming to challenge them. They are hoping to lure you in and kill you, certainly not allow you to get Edgar back. I’m sure they intend to dispose of him once the dagger is back safe in their grasp.”
I looked at her with a stern glare. “Edgar is a part of me, and I can’t live without him. I owe this to him, to us. What is life without that?”
Margriete’s eyes fell, and I saw that my words had hurt her.
“I’m sorry,” my gaze sank into sadness. “I didn’t mean it like that.”
She sighed, “Don’t be sorry, it’s my burden to bear. Matthew once gave me the love I deserved, and that is enough to serve me through to the end. I must sacrifice my happiness because of the choices I have made,” she turned and looked to the painting of us on the wall, enjoying the afternoon, as always. “I have those memories to hold on to, and living long enough to remember them is all I’ll ever need. But if I were you, and my love needed saving, I wouldn’t hesitate Elle.” She grasped my hand even tighter.
“Well then,” I stood and took a step toward the door, noticing that Sam had been standing there, for who knows how long.
“I smell adventure,” he seethed.
I sighed, “What makes you think you’re invited?”
He laughed, “What makes you think I’d let you girls go alone?”
We all laughed as I nodded, “Fine.”
Margriete made a move to get up but the blanket twisted around her feet. She began to fall to the floor, but suddenly, in a flash of light, she changed. Her four paws hit the wood with a soft thud, gracefully unscathed as the blanket fell around her.
I yelped, pulling my hand to my mouth as I drew in a terrified breath. I watched in horror as Margriete looked up at me with her feline eyes, meowing with a hint of disdain. I continued to hold my breath as she blinked, her body suddenly writhing as it did before, but much quicker this time.
She breathed hard as she finally changed, laying on the ground in her human form, naked and shaking. Sam had a lecherous smile on his face and I slapped him hard, rushing to her side and wrapping a blanket around her.
“That’s going to take getting used to,” she breathed as I helped her off the floor.
I smiled, “I think you and I have the same problems to work on.”
She leaned her weight on me as I walked her toward Sam and he scooped her into his strong grasp.
“Take her up to my bed, where she can rest,” I squeezed her arm one last time.
Margriete gave me a tired smile, “Thanks Elle, for bringing me back. I knew you of all people would see through to me.”
“Of course, you are my family.” The words stung my heart as I realized this life was worth the trouble, and worth the eighteen years I’d lost in sorrow and pain. As Sam walked away I felt a warmth come back to my heart and a love I had been missing. I clenched my fists, finding my path now clear and my mind ready.
THE PLAN
“Who’s cat?” Scott leaned away from Margriete as she sat on the log beside us, her tail flicking back and forth and the moss growing under her like a blanket of soft green wool.
“Oh, just a friend,” I said lightly, not drawing too much attention to the fact that she was an utterly perfect animal, with unearthly eyes and similar talents to mine.
Sarah stared at her with sick fascination, her gaze never faltering except for the occasional glance toward the trees where Isabelle and Henry both hid, watchful over Margriete, still uncertain of whom she really was.
“She’s so different, where did you find her?” Sarah reached out to pet her on the head, but Margriete shied away as she gave Sarah a narrowed grimace.
I laughed, “At the pound.”
Margriete turned and hissed at me, causing Sarah to laugh.
I picked at the moss that had also grown around me, the log budding with leaves despite the fact that it had been dead for a long time.
Margriete continued to eye me with disdain and I smirked.
“So,” I tried to divert their attention away from Margriete and get back to the matter at hand. I had given Scott one of my feathers in an attempt to learn more about myself and it was what I was here to do. “Scott, did you find anything?”
Scott’s eyes got wide, “Oh yeah,” he nodded with fervor as he dug through his bag, retrieving a crumpled pile of notes, “You weren’t lying, I found traces of metal in the DNA. Your feathers act as a coat of arms, armor, just as you suggested,” he paused and looked at the leaf that was now opening up beside us. “Your blood work was normal, if not too normal. Quite literally, your platelets seem suspended in space. You’re not aging.”
He touched the leaf as though he was afraid it would bite. “And then there’s this issue,” he plucked the leaf from the log and examined it. “I haven’t really figured this out yet, other than you seem to secrete a vitamin rich gas. It’s completely odorless, but acts much like a pheromone, attracting and stimulating all that surrounds you.” He looked me in the eyes, telling me that his previous attraction last year had been a scientific reaction, not necessarily love.
I nodded, “I knew I wouldn’t age, but it’s so odd, as though everything inside me froze when I became what I am. And the gas, I suppose I’d always had that, though it never seemed to work on people around me, or rather it did, and it completely freaked them out.”
Sarah nodded along with me as she continued to attempt to pet Margriete. I didn’t blame her, Margriete was gorgeous, but I could see how degrading it was for Margriete as well.
“If you stay this way, you’ll be eighteen forever,” he gasped.
I snorted, “Well, that’s the plan.”
“You’re so lucky,” Sarah whispered under her breath. She furled her brow as she looked at the blanket of moss below Margriete, “Is she…”
I laughed then, cutting her off. “Yes,” I said plainly.
“Oh,” Sarah leaned away from her, suddenly realizing her insignificance.
“Trust me. Living forever is bound to get old at some point. In my opinion, it can’t be all that fun,” I added.
Sarah looked at me closely, changing the subject, “So you really lived in the past? That’s phenomenal, you probably saw so much!”
Shrugging, I thought about all the things I didn’t remember. “Yeah well, most things I don’t even remember. My life isn’t quite that glamorous. You make it seem like a dream, but really, I think I’d rather be like you, benevolent to this whole world I’m in.” I winked at Margriete, feeling that she was one of the few who truly understood what it was like.
Sarah’s face fell into a frown, “I’m not that benevolent, I understand what’s happening.”
I grabbed her hand in apology, “I didn’t mean it like that. I meant that you get to live, where I have to suffer.”
She nodded, her spirit returning as she now seemed smug about the fact. It was true that though Sarah cared about this world, she didn’t have to worry about living in it forever.
I ran my foot through the gravel of the path as students began to emerge for breakfast. They eyed me with scared recognition, some giving me bad looks of disgust, others watching with shameless curiosity. My heart began to pick up, my nerves taking over as I suddenly felt how different I was. Last year at this time, I had been just another face, but now, I was much more.
Margriete hopped down from the log and walked toward the middle of the path, antagonizing the fearful students as she rolled around on the gravel, causing the weeds to thrive around
her. She was used to being inhuman, used to the stares and judgments. It wasn’t as though I hadn’t been subjected to this before, but never from an angle of authority and responsibility. I put my hand to my chest, feeling the once empty space where my soul now thrived. They were our children, our future, and it was then that I felt the burden of my existence tug at my soul.
“So what will you do now?” Scott cut through the silence.
I shrugged and tilted my head, my eyes still fixed on my feet. “I have to find Edgar, and I suppose, try to put things right.”
“So you really think he’s still alive?” Sarah’s face was twisted with confusion.
“Yeah, I’m positive.” I grabbed the ring that lay around my neck, a breath surrounding it and tickling my fingers. “There’s a possibility that he’s still out there somewhere. A friend of mine believes she knows where, so I’ll be leaving for a while.”
“A friend?” Sarah tilted her head.
I looked her in the eyes before looking at Margriete.
“Oh…” Sarah nodded, still confused by Margriete in her cat form, but coming around to the fact that she was like me, and could change.
“I wanted to come and say goodbye. I’m not sure what will happen, but there’s a possibility that this could be the last time I ever see you.” My eyes fell into my lap.
Scott put his hand on my back, “No Elle, I know we will see you again, so this isn’t goodbye.” He smiled and gave me a wink.
I felt warmth grow in my heart. Despite my leaving, it was good to have friends that had confidence in me, that knew I would return as I intended.
Margriete jumped into my lap then, her eyes searching mine with a sudden frantic cue. I furled my brow as I looked at her but she looked away and up the path. I followed her gaze, my heart stopping as Edgar’s ghost strode toward us, his gate large and powerful. Margriete turned to watch me, her claws digging through my jeans and piercing into my skin. She hadn’t yet seen the ghost and I was certain that she now felt the way I had, surprised and frightened by the immediacy of the moment, forgetting the ghost’s harmless demeanor.
He flew by us as though we were nothing, Scott, Sarah and I following his image with our eyes, our breaths shallow and slow and our bodies frozen. I squeezed my hand around the ring on my neck, smothering it in my nervous palm. My throat stung as I refused to breath, afraid that he would realize me, attacking though I knew he couldn’t.