by Harper Bliss
“You were grieving. You were just trying to hold on. And thoughts are just thoughts. Fleeting things that, most of the time, don’t mean a whole damn lot.”
“I’ve never told anyone that. Not even the grief counsellor I saw when I was living in London.”
Jill tugs me toward her again. “You can tell me anything.”
“So can you,” I say.
Jill nods, then looks at me, as though she already has something to tell me. “Maybe… we should have a conversation with Sebastian. Maybe we shouldn’t shut him out the way we’ve been doing.”
“Really?”
“Give it some thought, Ali,” she says. “He has his issues, but you only have one brother.” She purses her lips—it makes them look so kissable again. “What Jeffrey said to me last night was completely out of order, because he has no right to make such demands of me, but, somewhere in there, he might have had a point.”
“What are you saying?”
“I’m saying that plans can change, because circumstances change.”
“You’re going to have to be a little less cryptic. This is too important to be vague about.”
“Remember when you asked me to go to Paris with you?”
“Of course. We were meant to be there right now.” It seems like I asked Jill to hop on a last-minute plane with me weeks ago, whereas it’s only been days.
“I would have gone with you. I might not have been able to admit it to myself, but I wanted nothing more than to go to Paris with you.”
“We’ll go soon enough.”
“Maybe, or maybe not. Because we might be too busy.” She narrows her eyes. “We both have a big financial and emotional stake in LB. But it doesn’t mean we should devote our entire lives to it. There are other solutions.”
“Such as?”
“Such as… I can delegate more, reduce my workload a bit. And instead of you being the future CEO, you and Sebastian could both be CEO. You could both be in charge. Sebastian would be happy—well, he may grumble about having to share, but that’s his problem. He’d have the title and all that comes with it. He wouldn’t need to spend his time and energy coveting it and undermining us while doing so. It would be a way to make amends with him, possibly the only way. And, more importantly, we would have more time to live our lives.”
“Jesus, Jill. I think you may need to take me back to the hospital. I think I’m the one having a cardiac event.” I smile to make sure she knows I’m joking.
“It’s worth considering.”
I huff out some air. “He’d need to get clean first. Properly clean.”
“Of course. This doesn’t have to happen tomorrow. You have a pretty capable interim CEO. No rush.”
“She’ll have to prove herself,” I say. I press myself against Jill. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Leah’s name—the shape of the letters long ago imprinted in my brain. I never thought I’d experience a moment like this standing next to my sister’s grave, but here I am.
“I’m sure she’ll do her best,” Jill says, and kisses me gently on the cheek.
“I’ll think about it. I promise.”
“Talk to your dad about it while he’s still in the hospital. It seems to mellow him.”
“We should make a list of all the things to talk to him about while he’s in there.”
“You’re young, Ali. Even though you’ve dealt with more than your fair share of death, you’re in the absolute prime of your life. You radiate health. But for me, seeing Jeffrey like that, actually seeing with my own eyes, what a life of very limited love and affection and a hundred percent dedication to work has done to him. It has given me pause.”
“I will never be like my dad.” I curl my arms around her neck.
“Who would have thought,” Jill says, “that you coming back would change everything. To tell you the truth, I thought you were going to be a massive pain in my ass, and nothing more than that.”
“I was going to be your boss.”
“You still are.”
I shake my head. “No. It’s impossible for me to be your boss. Maybe on paper, but not in spirit.”
“We’ll see.”
“We will.” I kiss her, and, as I do, I no longer have eyes for Leah’s gravestone.
Epilogue - Jill
40
Jill
Three Years Later
“How’s your French?” I ask Ali.
“Très bon.” She lifts up her glass of champagne. “Although I guess you’ll have to take my word for it.” She smiles before she takes a sip. She still looks very much like the woman who barged into my life three years ago, yet so much about her has changed as well. Her hair is short now—even shorter than mine—and she’s wearing glasses. Once she and Sebastian took over from me as co-CEOs of Lennox Breweries, and she started attending public events in that function, I would glance at her from the corner of my eye and could hardly believe the transformation. As though, when you’re a Lennox, being given a title will do that to you.
“I won’t have to take your word for it.” In the lead-up to our long-awaited trip to Paris, which is only the starting point of a two-month-long jaunt through France, I’ve taken French lessons. “Monsieur,” I say to a member of the cabin crew walking past my seat. “Can you tell me what time it is in Paris right now, please?” I ask him in French. It sounded better in my head, but then again, languages have never been my strong suit, and a couple of lessons can only teach me so much.
“Paris a neuf heures d’avance sur nous,” he says. “Donc il est huit heures du soir.” He finishes off with a wide grin, then leaves.
“Did you get that?” I ask.
“Of course,” Ali says. “Did you?”
“It’s 8 p.m. in Paris.” I extend my arm over the table that divides the space between us. “But truth be told, I could do with some extreme immersion.”
Ali takes my hand. “You can immerse yourself all you want for the next two months, babe,” she says.
I nod. “How are you feeling?” It’s been quite the experience to see Ali evolve from someone who regularly arrived at the office late, her lackluster attitude always on display, to the big boss who often stays long after I’ve gone home for the day. “Withdrawal’s not too bad?”
“My phone’s off,” she says. “And I trust Seb.”
“So do I.” When we approached Sebastian about becoming CEO alongside Ali, it was like a switch flipped inside his head. As though that exact opportunity was what he’d been waiting for to fully get his act together. One of the reasons we’re only going away for two months is because he’s getting married to a woman he met during his last stint in rehab. The main reason, though, is that neither Ali nor I can imagine being away from Lennox Breweries much longer than that. And that way, Sebastian can go on his honeymoon without having to worry about the company too much.
I hold up my half-empty glass of champagne, which is promptly refilled by the same member of the cabin crew I just practiced my French with. I only wanted to make another small toast, but I accept his spontaneous top-up by emitting a few more sentences in broken French.
“To Paris,” I say. “I thought we’d never make it.”
“But we did.” Ali narrows her eyes and leans over the partition. “My cougar and me.”
I close my eyes and shake my head. “I asked you a million times, Ali. Don’t call me that. I’m hardly a predator. If anything, you came after—”
“Just a joke.” She leans all the way over and kisses me on the cheek. “Time for the COO to relax and expand her sense of humor.”
“If I didn’t have a sense of humor,” I remind Ali, “we wouldn’t be on this plane right now.”
“What are you saying? That being with me is all a joke to you? Well, the past three years have been funny sometimes, but fuck, you worked me hard.”
“I hope I did some other things as well.” The past three years haven’t always been a walk in the park, but we’re here now, still together, finally on ou
r way to Paris. While we set up the new structures at the company, and got used to our new roles, we always clung to the idea of one day going on that trip to Paris.
“One day, we’ll have Paris,” we used to joke, because that day always seemed so far away. But time did what it always does: it passed. It brought us here. And we’re not quite in Paris yet, but we’ll be there in a few hours, and I’m convinced that I’m much better off going now than when Ali first asked me three years ago, on a whim.
Because this is no longer a whim. Ali and I are in a long-term relationship that has been approved by both our families. Two nights ago, as a farewell, we had dinner at Jeffrey’s house in Beverly Hills, with Sebastian and his bride-to-be. Jeffrey will never run the company again, although he will always find ways to meddle and have his say, but his heart has held up, and he’s doing as well as can be expected.
Ali and I may tell ourselves we didn’t need anyone’s approval, and maybe our love would have survived that particular hardship, but we did get Jeffrey’s and Sebastian’s blessing, avoiding a lot of stress. Sometimes, I think that it was mainly me who needed the Lennox blessing, because I’m the older one and, perhaps, I should have known better than to fall for Ali; but Ali, too, has flourished, slowly but surely, by tightening the ties with her family.
In order to do so, she had to go away, because that’s how it is sometimes. Sometimes, the pain in one place can be too overwhelming to deal with, as though it accumulates because of the proximity of the people suffering, and it’s only air and space and time that can make the worst of it evaporate, can make you breathe again. And Ali can breathe again now. She can thrive. And I do the same alongside her. It would be impossible not to.
Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed Ali and Jill’s story.
If you liked this age-gap romance, you may enjoy my Cotswolds romance: A Lesson in Love.
CLICK HERE TO READ A LESSON IN LOVE NOW >>
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About the Author
Harper Bliss is a best-selling lesbian romance author. Among her most-loved books are the highly dramatic French Kissing and the often thought-provoking Pink Bean series.
Harper lived in Hong Kong for 7 years, travelled the world for a bit, and has now settled in Brussels (Belgium) with her wife and photogenic cat, Dolly Purrton.
Together with her wife, she hosts a weekly podcast called Harper Bliss & Her Mrs.
Harper loves hearing from readers and you can reach her at the email address below.
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Also by Harper Bliss
A Lesson in Love
Life in Bits (with T.B. Markinson)
A Swing at Love (with Caroline Bliss)
No Greater Love than Mine
Once Upon a Princess (with Clare Lydon)
In the Distance There Is Light
The Road to You
Seasons of Love
Release the Stars
Once in a Lifetime
At the Water’s Edge
The French Kissing Series (Seasons 1-5)
High Rise (The Complete Collection)
the Pink Bean Series
More Than Words (Book 9)
Crazy for You (Book 8)
Love Without Limits (Book 7)
No Other Love (Book 6)
Water Under Bridges (Book 5)
This Foreign Affair (Book 4)
Everything Between Us (Book 3)
Beneath the Surface (Book 2)
No Strings Attached (Book 1)
For a complete list of all Harper Bliss titles, please visit harperbliss.com/books
Copyright © 2019 by Harper Bliss
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No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance of characters to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. The author holds exclusive rights to this work. Unauthorized duplication is prohibited.
Cover design by Caroline Manchoulas
Published by Ladylit Publishing - Hong Kong
ISBN: 978-988-79124-7-7