“Jesus Christ, Gianna,” Eric hissed. “What were you thinking? You know you’re not supposed to try to enter our bond again, not for a long while yet.”
“I wasn’t.” An elbow dug into my back, jostling me, and I remembered where we were. “Can we talk about this later? Please?”
“We will absolutely talk about it at length and in depth.” Eric pressed a brief kiss to my mouth and stepped back. “Right now, I think Alice and I need to have a little chat.”
Jason swept me into a dance as soon as Eric moved away. “I thought he’d never leave.”
I raised my eyes to his, intending to deliver a not-quite-kind set down, and caught the mischief in his grin. “You’re so bad.”
He leaned close, his blue eyes glowing clear and wild and hot. “Baby, you have no idea.”
Chapter Six
We ate and we drank, and as the meal progressed, the five of us eased into comfort. Alice unbent enough to dance with Gregory, and hope wormed its way into my heart. Hope for her and the end of her loneliness, hope for Gregory and the end of his pain. There was something there, slippery, elusive. I glimpsed tantalizing pieces of his past, awash in fire, and from Alice the ever-present sense of loss and guilt.
She always felt that way around me, or rather, I always felt those things coming from her and hadn’t yet reasoned out why. Gregory, though, seemed to amplify her emotions at the same time that he inhibited her vampirism. I could help her if I could just figure out the cause of it all, but those memories, hers and his, evaded my grasp.
She’d helped me so much. Why couldn’t my mind function enough to help her?
Afterward, we went to SkyView, where Eric rented a gondola for the five of us. I’d never been, not once, though I’d lived near Atlanta all my life.
When a free gondola came around, we piled in one after the other, laughing and joking. As we had all night, Jason, Eric, and I took one side, my hands secure in theirs, and Alice and Gregory the other. The men talked and we soaked up their attention. Life as a young vampire was lonely, no matter what anybody said to the contrary. Neither of us had a permanent stable, and though I had Eric and Jason, their residence elsewhere made for some damn lonely nights.
The car shuddered it’s way around as other gondolas were unloaded and filled again. At the top, Eric said, “Look, Gigi. You can see the whole world.”
I leaned across Eric’s lap and peered out into the night without losing my grip on Jason’s hand. He was a reassuring presence in my mind and I wanted him to share my wonder.
The city was spread out below us, as bright and cheerful as a lit Christmas tree. Eric’s arm came around me, holding me in place, steadying me, and I turned and smiled, so thankful to have him in my life.
He cupped my face and his beautiful eyes glowed bright, the gold seeming to overtake the brown and green. “Happy birthday, wife.”
“My husband,” I murmured. “My beautiful husband.” I touched my lips gently to his. He opened for me, let me explore at will, and my heart leapt into my throat. I needed more, needed his goodness inside me, needed to feel his skin under my own. I slipped my hand from Jason’s, rested it on Eric’s thigh. Emotion, twisted and dark, feathered across me. I broke the kiss and gasped as it threaded through my mind.
Jason.
The rawness of his jealousy and bitterness washed over me unchecked. I slumped into the seat between the two of them, pressed a trembling hand to my throbbing heart, and still it came, ever stronger, in wave after wave of unceasing shadow, swallowing me in escalating bites of darkness.
“Enough.” Eric’s voice snapped through the gondola. “She’s had enough, Jason. Jesus God, you’ll drive her back to the cage.”
“No, please no,” I gasped, and bowed my head under another wave of unfettered emotion.
Jason gritted his teeth. The muscles in his neck strained and his skin reddened, and his hands clenched into fists against his thighs. “I’m trying.”
Alice leaned forward and speared Eric with a grim stare. “I warned you.”
“I was willing to take the risk, if it strengthened us all.” Eric took my hand and fixed his gaze on me. His mind brushed over mine. “Fight it, Gigi.”
He turned his gaze on Jason, and gradually, the emotion receded, taking the darkness with it. Jason relaxed bit by bit and, after what seemed like an eternity, finally brought himself under control, his breaths panting out of him in great, heaving gusts. He snagged my hand, held it tight. “I’m sorry, baby. So sorry. I never meant to hurt you.”
I nodded, not sure what else to do. My mind was tender and my body trembled, but the shadows were gone and that was enough.
Eric’s eyes went black and his features thinned and tightened. “That was the last straw, Jase.”
Jason tensed in his seat. Across from us, Gregory tensed as well, his hands curling into giant fists on his thighs.
“Pull it back, man,” Jason said.
“No, I think it’s time I showed you exactly what I’m capable of.” Eric pulled me into his arms and cradled my head against his chest with the steady thump of his heart under my ear. “Your jealousy and resentment will rip this family apart if we let it, and your lack of control, on this of all nights, is unforgiveable. You’re the most disciplined man I know, so I have to believe this started with a deliberate release on your part.”
“It wasn’t entirely his fault.” Alice’s eyes were hard and cold, glittering sapphires. “Gregory…”
“Hey, now.” Gregory’s fists unwound and his eyes widened. “I don’t even know what’s going on.”
“You’re unintentionally inhibiting his control.” She swung her gaze toward him. “It’s part of who you are, part of your heritage.”
Gregory’s expression went flat. “I was orphaned when I was three. I don’t remember my parents, never knew any of my family.”
Her gaze softened. She touched her fingertips to his cheek, traced the line of his jaw. “I know.”
“She’ll explain it later,” Eric said, “when you’re ready, though it needs to begin tonight.”
Alice blanched. “Eric, no.”
“I’m afraid so. I can’t let Jason’s lapse of control go unpunished and Gregory will interfere, whether he means to or not.”
I tensed and glanced at Jason. His jaw was set, though his expression held enough weariness for the both of us. What kind of punishment would Eric dole out that would cause Jason to dread it?
Gregory leaned forward. “Would y’all stop talking around me? Goddamn, I’m right here.”
“Alice will explain it later, Gregory,” Eric said. “This I swear.”
“Yeah?” Gregory glanced at her and his mouth turned down at the corners. “Seems to me she should be making that promise.”
Alice shook her head, sending her curls bouncing. Her lips parted and closed, and she shook her head again.
“Tend to him, Alice.” When her eyes flashed, Eric added, “Don’t pretend it’s a hardship, not to me.”
She took a deep breath, set her clutch on the seat beside her. “I do this because I owe a debt that can never be repaid.”
“You do this because you want him,” Eric corrected gently. “That debt is just a way for you to salvage your pride.”
Gregory rested his hand over hers, clasped tightly together in her lap. “Is it true? Do you want me?”
She nodded, though her eyes were trained on his darker hand where it covered hers.
“You’re freezing. Here.” He tugged off his suit jacket and draped it around her shoulders. “Better?”
“Yes, thank you.” She lifted his lapel to her face, breathed in his scent, and a soft smile bloomed on her pale face. “Our turn’s coming to an end, Eric. Do you want to begin here or in the car?”
“Here’s fine. Jason’ll need the break from here to the car, then from the car into the house.”
I squeezed Eric’s hand. “What are you going to do to him?”
He kissed me, smoothed my hair back. �
��Nothing that will cause permanent harm, I promise.”
I nodded, though it wasn’t a satisfying answer. Punishment was bad. Bad, bad, bad. The crack of the whip rang through my head and I jerked under blows I couldn’t quite recall receiving.
“Never that,” he said. “I swear it, baby. I’ll never do that to either one of you.”
Alice pulled Gregory’s jacket closed over her chest. “Will three full tours be enough?”
“Just one more.” Eric slid a sideways glance to Jason, and with it a sly, sensual smile. “That’s all the time I’m giving him.”
“Seriously,” Gregory said. “Being in the dark is getting old.”
Alice shushed him. “In a moment, you’ll have other things to think about.”
The gondola came to a full stop, and I realized we’d been moving at least since Jason’s jealousy had pulsed over me.
We’d completed a ten-minute tour of Atlanta’s sky and I hadn’t even been aware of it.
The door opened and the attendant stuck his head in. Alice leaned forward and caught his gaze. “Be a good fellow and give us another turn, would you?”
The attendant shut the door without another word, his expression dazed and starry-eyed.
Gregory huffed out a laugh. “Someday, I’d really love to know how you do that.”
“Someday, you may,” Alice murmured. She cupped his cheek and drew him down to her, touched her lips softly to his. “Is this ok?”
“God, yes.”
Gregory pulled her into his lap and claimed her mouth in a kiss both fierce and tender. My heart melted just a little, seeing the way they held each other, carefully, tentatively, as if each was afraid the other would back away unexpectedly. I reached out to Alice, searching for the happiness I hoped she’d find.
Eric tugged at my hand, breaking my quest. “No spying, Gigi. If she wants you to know, she’ll tell you.”
I glanced at them, then at him. “I’m sorry.”
“Never be sorry for caring.” He squeezed my hand once more and dropped it. “Jason, it’s time.”
Jason rose from his seat and knelt on the floor in front of Eric, knees spread, hands on thighs, his head bowed.
“As punishment for your inability to control your emotions, you will service your master and mistress the entire night without finding release yourself.”
Jason stiffened. His mouth thinned into a harsh slash across his face, and the first inkling of doubt wended its way through me.
“This is something you must do on your own, without drawing on my strength or Gianna’s.” Eric leaned back against the seat and placed both feet flat on the floor. “You have until we reach the end of this ride to satisfy me.”
Jason looked up, and his eyes glowed and sparked. “Yes, Master.”
He scooted forward on his knees, settling himself between Eric’s thighs.
Eric cupped Jason’s nape. “Never underestimate what I’ll do to protect this family.”
“I know, Eric.” Jason’s voice was soft and full of regret. “I know what we’d both do.”
We’ve done it before. The unspoken sentiment floated between them, wafting over me, inextricably intertwined with grief and pain and a sense of many battles won and lost.
Jason unfastened Eric’s belt and pants, slid the zipper down. Tugged Eric’s underwear down far enough to pull out his already hard dick. “Not much of a punishment, lover.”
Eric smiled, and for the first time I realized exactly how dangerous my mild-mannered husband could be. That smile held such ruthless determination, I tensed in my seat and held my breath.
Jason bent over Eric’s dick, sucked it slowly into his mouth.
A series of moving images hit, carrying with it the emotion of a time I’d never known. Eric, stripped to the skin, kneeling on a bed, his hands braced in front of him. Jason behind him, removing a glistening butt plug from Eric’s ass, replacing it with his erection in a slow, insistent push of his hips. Eric’s hands tightening on the sheets, his head thrown back, ecstasy and love winding their way in equal measure through him as Jason fucked him, his thrusts growing harder and faster.
I inhaled deeply around the sharp heat gathering in my blood. How beautiful they were, locked together in passion, loving one another so deeply I could sense it in everything they did. This is what they’d been before I’d reentered their lives, and it sliced at my heart. I’d ruined that, spoiled the bond between them, tainted the beautiful memory with the dank darkness of my sins.
Eric’s hand found mind, clasping it tight in his own. “No, baby, no. Never believe that.”
Jason wrapped a hand over ours, joining us for a brief moment before he pulled away and shifted the angle of his head, drawing Eric deeper into his mouth with a satisfied hmm.
Eric gasped and dropped his head against the back of the seat. “God, Jase. That’s so good.”
Jason turned his head and winked at me, and I couldn’t resist anymore. I scooted closer to them on the seat, trapping mine and Eric’s entwined hands between our thighs, and stroked my free hand over Jason’s head. His hair was silky, warmed by his skin. I petted him, comforting him as he worked his mouth over Eric’s dick.
Another image hit my mind and I closed my eyes, bracing myself. Jason lay on his back, hands digging into Eric’s hips as Eric moved over him, rolling his hips, taking Jason’s hard length as deep as he could. Jason gasped and thrust upward…
(…Eric, baby, fuck yes, love you. Need to come, need to fill him. God, please Eric…)
No. No, no, no. I panted out a sharp breath and back peddled away from the memory, away from mine and Jason’s bond. Not quickly enough. With a sucking pop, I entered it and the memory Eric was using to arouse Jason, testing his lover’s control…
(…let me come, Eric, please. His ass squeezing my dick, fucking me, the cum building and building, his mouth on my throat. Need to come, need to, Jesus God, please, can’t take anymore. You know how I feel about her, know how I feel…)
I recognized this memory, had been there before in Jason’s mind. Eric’s hand tightened on mine, his fingers digging into my skin, bruising bone and muscle. The world spun, dizzy, dizzy. Fragments, everything fragmented, bits of dust and age and love, and I was no longer in Jason’s memory, no longer in the pain of unnatural arousal…
(…love you so much, Jase. His body, so big and warm and strong, so helpless beside me. Why can’t you feel me? Why won’t you try?...)
Eric gasped and turned to me, his glowing eyes confused. “What are you doing, Gianna?”…
(…trying, Eric. Don’t you think I’ve fucking tried? Jason covered his eyes, hiding himself from me. Do you think I want to be a cripple the rest of my life, give up everything that means anything to me because I can’t feel my fucking legs? Can’t feel...)
My fingers curled into a fist, taking Jason’s hair with them, holding him as tightly as Eric held me. There was something there, something wrong. I needed to understand, needed to stop the pain, the unceasing punishment, bad, bad, bad…
(…I need you now, need you to be strong, need you to feel me. You’re all I have left. Kiss his beautiful mouth, skim my hand over his chest, warm, so blessedly warm. Need that warmth, need his love. Feel me, Jason. Goddamn you, FEEL me…)
Eric arched against the seat, pushing his dick hard into Jason’s mouth. His hand fell on Jason’s shoulder, clutching the fabric of his jacket in shaky fingers. “Why can’t you feel me, Jason? Please, God, feel me.”
His body went rigid, and in a flash of light and sound, emotion exploded from him, radiating outward in a swiftly moving river of need and sorrow and pain. It hit me hard, rolling over my mind like a train crashing through a wooden fence. My cry echoed around the gondola, rebounded in notes of Gregory and Alice and Eric and Jason, their voices joining mine in a vibrating chorus, lifting me into the light.
Eric collapsed against the seat, panting. The river receded, returning to its source in a rushing backwash, and in its wake, I fell out of
the light and plummeted into the shadows where I belonged.
Chapter Seven
A car door slamming. The rustle of fabric. Movement, gradually increasing in speed.
A tap on my cheek. “Gianna, baby. Wake up.”
I lifted an unsteady hand, pushed ineffectually. My body ached and throbbed. Even my fingernails hurt. I dropped my hand and sighed. “Tired, Jase.”
“After what you pulled, you should be.” His voice was warm, amused. “Come on, now. Open those pretty eyes for me.”
I opened them, only for him. Squinted in the low light, searching for cornflower blue. Everything was blurry, the big man beside me, his suit blending into the night, and anything beyond.
“There you are.” He laughed, flashing white, even teeth, and his hand skimmed over my cheek. “You had us worried for a minute.”
“Sorry.”
I blinked rapidly, squeezed my eyes shut, opened them again. The world sprang into sharp focus. Jason knelt beside me, one hand holding mine, the other cupping my face. A hard thigh twitched beneath my head. I wiggled around, looked up, and found Eric staring down at me, his expression closed.
“Hey, you.”
“Hey, baby.” He brushed the backs of his fingers along my forehead, smoothed my hair back. “How do you feel?”
His voice was cool, impersonal. A twinge of hurt plucked at my heart. I pushed and pulled my way off his leg until I sat beside him. My head went tilt-a-whirl, dampening my awareness for a moment. I pressed trembling fingers to my forehead, and soon, the spinning stopped, bringing enough clarity for me to function.
We were in the car on the way back home. Jason shifted, kneeling in front of me, his hands braced on either side of the seat beside me. Alice and Gregory were across from us, Gregory leaning forward, worry etched into his expression.
Alice sat stiff and straight-backed, her blue eyes cold and terrible in their beauty.
I dropped my gaze, inhaled, or tried to. My breath hitched on the ball of hurt lodged in my chest, just over my heart, and refused to go any farther. What had I done to drive two people I cared for, people I thought cared for me, to look right through me as if I weren’t there?
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