by Durjoy Datta
Dhruv felt his stomach grumble. ‘You’re kidding, right?’ Dhruv was in half a mind to grab Aranya, tie her up, and take her away from anyone who might stake a claim on her.
‘He said he would talk to my parents, make everything okay. He said he will be with me for good. I don’t think he is going to kid about such a thing. He was very serious about it.’
‘Are you out of your mind?’ said Dhruv. ‘You’re talking nonsense right now. You’re imagining things. He would never say that. You know his history with all those women. He’s never leaving that for you.’
‘He would. He’s getting his act together. And if he has decided it, he will do it. Raghuvir will make everything all right for me,’ she said and she looked at Dhruv. ‘He said that. Quite a few times actually.’
‘You’re kidding.’
‘I’m not, Dhruv. He said it to my face. He’s mature enough to think before he says what he says. He’s out there waiting for my reply and I’m still thinking what to say to him,’ said Aranya. Her matter-of-fact tone angered Dhruv. Why the hell was she asking him? He was not going to be a part of her mathematics about whether she should choose him or not.
‘So tell him what you want!’
‘What do you think I should tell him?’ asked Aranya, holding Dhruv’s gaze, careful enough to keep her voice’s interrogative tone alive.
‘Whatever you feel like doing. Why are you asking me?’
‘You have nothing to say about it? Nothing? No jokes? No wisecracks? Nothing to humiliate me? Where did all that hatred go? Because frankly, Dhruv, if I leave this room and tell him that I’m going to be with him for the rest of my life, I’m going to win our game of cat and mouse. You will lose. Are you ready for that?’
Dhruv hesitated. ‘Okay, you want to know what I think about it? Well, I can’t wait for you to leave and have little ugly, penguin babies with him!’ Dhruv laughed nervously and looked away, not wanting to dwell in that thought.
Aranya slumped back into her chair, defeated. ‘So you think I should say yes?’
Dhruv nodded reluctantly. ‘Yes,’ he said. Dhruv had to act right now. He had to tell her he loved her and keep her from going away. But the words dried up in his mouth. What could he possibly say?
‘You’re right, Dhruv. Probably this is the first time we concur on something. It’s the right thing to do. My father would lovingly hand me over to him. After all, they thought I would die alone in some hole after putting them through the shame of having an unmarried daughter. Of course, this is the right thing to do. Thank you, Dhruv. Do you think this would be my last chance for a normal, happy life?’
‘Why would you ask me that?’ snapped Dhruv, flipping open a book, staring at random pages, his heart slowly breaking.
‘Because you would know, Dhruv. You are the only one outside my family who has been capable of giving me indescribable pain. You’re the only one who has destroyed my life—twice,’ said Aranya, her eyes welling up.
Dhruv wanted to tell her he loved her, but how could he do that? He had lost every right to wrest her away from certain happiness. ‘I think you’re right. Raghuvir is your last chance at happiness. I think he might be a terrible choice of a man to be with but he’s your chance at happiness.’
The door opened again. Aranya was called for the interview.
‘Best of luck,’ said Dhruv.
‘I don’t need it,’ Aranya answered and left the room.
I Love u Rachu
62
Dhruv sat staring at the ceiling, evaluating his options. There were a few more companies that offered internships, but none of them were paid. He could take one in a smaller city like Gwalior or Bhubaneswar and wait it out there for these two months.
His train of thought was broken when Sanchit came barging into his room, shouting. ‘What the hell did you just do?’
Dhruv ignored his presence, instead fired up his laptop, and started to compare rentals of Gwalior.
Sanchit slapped the laptop down and asked him again. ‘What did you do in the interview? I am asking you something.’
‘I didn’t take it,’ said Dhruv, still not making eye contact. He picked up the sports magazine lying near the bed and flipped through it.
‘I know that, Sherlock. WHY DIDN’T YOU?’ asked Sanchit.
‘There wasn’t any point, okay?’ snapped Dhruv, meeting Sanchit’s eyes. ‘Raghuvir was there. He wanted to take Aranya and that’s why the company was picking first-year students. Got your answer? Now get out of the room and leave me the fuck alone. I need to masturbate.’
‘So why are you getting so pissed off?’
‘Because you’re in my face right now!’ shouted Dhruv. ‘Get out!’
‘Not before I tell you what I wanted to say. A) You’re my most disappointing student and you’re not getting that favour ever again and B) apparently, Aranya screwed up so bad in her interview that the other two interviewers sent placement coordinators looking all over for you.’
Dhruv closed the magazine. ‘What are you talking about?’
‘My highly placed sources tell me she froze in the interview. Not one answer came out of her! NOT ONE.’
‘Okay.’
‘Wonder why that would happen?’ asked Sanchit.
‘It must be the pressure,’ dismissed Dhruv.
‘Pressure? Aranya? That girl was born in a pressure cooker, dude. Pressure’s a way of life for her. Don’t you think for a moment that she did it intentionally? You watch a lot of soaps, don’t you? Think? Hmmm?’
‘Why would she do that?’ asked Dhruv, the question directed towards himself rather than Sanchit.
‘Maybe because if she did choose to take the internship, she would lose you forever? Maybe the girl is in love with you? Making sense?’
‘That’s bullshit,’ snapped Dhruv.
‘That’s only my theory, Dhruv. You can choose not to believe it. I just want to know why you wouldn’t believe the theory.’
‘BECAUSE I CAN’T FUCKING GIVE HER WHAT RAGHUVIR CAN!’ shouted Dhruv.
Sanchit pumped his fist, a creepy smile swept across his face. ‘I knew it!’
‘Huh?’
‘I know you so well I think we should date.’ He walked up to Dhruv and pulled up a chair. ‘I understand, man. Dhruv, the eternal lover, backing down, sacrificing his love for a better life for the girl. So noble.’
‘You think I should pursue her? What good would come out of that?’ asked Dhruv, introspecting.
‘For once, Dhruv, I think you’re doing the right thing. The girl deserves a break. And no matter how much I love you, I think you make for an awful boyfriend. I don’t think Aranya can take another failed relationship.’
‘Glad to see your confidence in me.’ Dhruv smiled weakly.
‘Don’t be gloomy,’ said Sanchit and tapped his head. ‘It’s fucking brave what you’re doing.’
‘It’s not brave. It’s cowardly.’
‘Two sides of the same coin, my friend. Love’s like going to war, Dhruv. Those men with medals strapped to their chests aren’t brave. They are afraid to get killed. So instead they kill. You’re just saving collateral damage here. Taking a bullet for her. You should be proud of yourself.’
‘Shouldn’t you be advocating for me? Pushing me to go, get the girl who could be my only shot at love?’
Sanchit laughed heartily. ‘If it would have been any girl other than her, I would have. But I love Aranya too. Don’t forget that. And I would not see any harm come to her. And you, my best friend, are poison.’
‘Fuck off.’
‘As you say, Dhruv,’ said Sanchit. He got up, saluted Dhruv, and left the room. ‘But if Raghuvir is hanging up his boots at being the perpetual philanderer he must have thought it through. Goodnight.’
Dhruv pulled the blanket over himself and in the darkness he thought about how much, if at all, Aranya was in love with him.
I Love u Rachu
63
Aranya sat on the bench outside the inte
rview room, crying. Inside, she could hear Raghuvir arguing her case, pushing the two interviewers into hiring her even though Aranya hadn’t answered a single question correctly. Raghuvir had prodded her, asked her to take a break, relax, have a glass of water, but nothing had helped.
She had been too distracted by the thought of the interview taking her life in a direction she hadn’t had the time to think about. She couldn’t think of anything else but Dhruv. What the hell was she doing? She was a pathetic, weak wreck.
It must have looked like she deliberately tanked it.
She held her head in her hands and cried. What did she want? Dhruv was a closed chapter. Didn’t she already see that first-hand? Why was she still holding on to the thought inside? Life had thrown a great opportunity her way and she had spilled it.
The door opened and Raghuvir walked out looking for her. He stood tall in front of her, hands on his waist, angry but controlled.
‘What happened in there, Aranya?’
‘I don’t know,’ sobbed Aranya.
‘Listen, Aranya, I dragged them all the way from Bangalore so that they could hire you and not only did you embarrass me inside, you ruined the chance of us being together. I NEED to know what happened inside,’ muttered Raghuvir angrily, his eyes burning.
Raghuvir rolled his eyes, turned and slammed the wall with his palm. ‘Damn it.’ He breathed deeply to calm himself. ‘Okay. There’s nothing to worry. We can still make it. Dhruv didn’t take the interview so you just need to beat that halfwit boy we interviewed before.’ He sat on his haunches in front of Aranya and took her hand into his. ‘We are going to be fine. I’m going to talk to them and we will take the interview again. Just stop crying. I will make it okay, all right?’
Aranya nodded, tears still flowing abundantly, and all she could think about was Dhruv and his running away from the interview. She stopped crying when she saw her phone ring. It was her father. Raghuvir prodded Aranya to take the call.
‘Hello? Aranya? How did the interview go?’ asked the father, without any pleasantries.
‘I . . . I . . .’
‘THINK BEFORE LYING TO ME, ARANYA. I’m warning you,’ shouted the father, his deafening voice audible to Raghuvir.
‘There’s . . . another . . . round left,’ stammered Aranya.
‘Huh? Even after warning you, you’re still lying to me. I talked to the dean. He told me you said nothing in the interview. NOTHING! Why? I want an answer, Aranya, or I will drag you home and never let you leave the house. I had warned you. No more chances.’
Raghuvir snatched the phone from Aranya. ‘Hello, Sir. This is Prof. Raghuvir.’
‘What do you want?’
‘I’m the one interviewing your daughter. I also happen to be the professor with whom Aranya was caught on tape. I am talking to you to assure you that she did nothing wrong that day or even today,’ said Raghuvir authoritatively.
‘But—’
‘I assure you that she will get the internship today. I will personally make sure she gets through the interview. We hit a snag during the interview process. We thought of her as a fourth-year student as opposed to a first-year student. Your daughter is very talented and will be an asset to the company. Aranya has never intentionally broken a rule or done anything in the college that would disgrace you or your family and would never do so in the future. She was a victim of circumstances and of college politics. If you ever have any doubts about her activities, you can call me. If you have any doubts about my credibility, I will have someone send over my qualifications and my body of work. If you still doubt my character or my intentions towards your daughter, I can share with you the contact numbers of my parents and you can have a word with them. They know about my friendship with your daughter. I bear no ill intention towards her. She’s safe with me. And she would do nothing without your permission.’
There was no answer from the other side. Aranya, gobsmacked, thought the line was cut. But then her father spoke in a tone which wasn’t angry or furious, just functional, ‘Text me the number of your parents. And pass the phone to Aranya.’
‘Gladly, Sir.’
Raghuvir gave the phone to a scared Aranya who put the phone to her ear. ‘Hello?’
‘Best of luck for the interview,’ said her father.
Click.
Aranya looked at Raghuvir, not knowing how to thank him. This was the sweetest gesture she had ever seen from her father.
‘What do you think he thought about me?’ asked Raghuvir, smiling now, a far cry from his serious self moments ago.
‘I think he found the person he can pass on the baggage to,’ said Aranya, and smiled weakly, thinking of how pathetic and predictable her father was.
‘Don’t say that, Aranya.’
‘I’m your responsibility now. He’s sure to call your parents.’
‘They know about you,’ said Raghuvir.
‘You keep surprising me, Sir.’
Raghuvir smiled. ‘There’s no surprise there, Aranya. Everything’s got to fit in if we have to make this work. Okay, now you wait here. I need to convince them for another interview,’ said Raghuvir and held her hand. ‘Give it your best shot this time.’
‘I don’t seem to have a choice now, do I?’ Aranya nodded, still thinking how Raghuvir always kept repeating the words ‘compromise’, ‘let’s make it work’, ‘hard work’, like relationships were the most unnatural, forced things people got into.
I Love u Rachu
64
This would be the exact moment when Dhruv would have been practising mind relaxation techniques if he knew any. Pacing around the room hadn’t helped. Breaking the chair only resulted in a splinter lodging itself in his thumb, making him angrier. His laptop was too expensive to send flying out of the window.
Fuck noble. Because right now all he wanted to do was smash Raghuvir’s face with a hammer and kidnap Aranya. Being sacrificial and doing the right thing wasn’t quite working out for him.
There was a knock at the door.
‘FUCK OFF, SANCHIT.’
‘It’s me,’ said a girl’s voice.
Dhruv rushed to open the door. It was Ritika in a sweatshirt and loose trackpants, looking sorry.
‘What are you doing here?’ barked Dhruv, ushering her inside the room, looking left and right to check if someone had seen her come in.
‘I’m miserable without you,’ said Ritika, her voice quivering, her fingers trembling like a drug addict’s. ‘I think we can build our relationship again. These two months might be exactly what we need.’ She stepped closer and kept her hand on Dhruv’s chest.
‘You’re patching up with me?’
‘I think so,’ said Ritika, her face hovering close to Dhruv’s.
‘The last time didn’t end so well. I would rather not be dumped in full public view again,’ said Dhruv, thinking what was the worst that could happen. He would lose the love of a girl he didn’t really love. He had been through it before and it wasn’t exactly painful. This could be the perfect rebound. Not that he would get over Aranya. Eight years hadn’t changed anything. But then, two months couldn’t hurt now, could it? he thought.
‘Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that,’ said Ritika and kissed Dhruv who kissed her back.
They stripped each other off their clothes. Dhruv pulled off the bed sheet, stained with month-old food gravies, man juice, alcohol, dried protein shakes, and pushed Ritika on to the mattress. He found the mind relaxation technique he had been looking for.
He fucked Ritika’s brains out.
I Love u Rachu
65
Raghuvir argued, fought, shouted, and got Aranya another crack at the interview. He left the room and found the bench empty.
Shit. He fetched his cellphone and frantically dialled her number.
On the other side of the campus, the phone rang in Aranya’s trembling hand. She put it on silent and skipped up the stairs to reach the corridor where Dhruv’s room was.
It was a leap
of faith and made zero sense but she needed to tell him she loved him. He needed to know or she would forever be troubled by ‘What If I Had Told Him?’ She owed herself a better love story, an extraordinary love story rather than the one on offer. As she sprinted along the corridors she imagined Dhruv being shocked, then overwhelmed, going down on his knees, confessing his love for her, apologizing for everything he had done and would do, and then fight off Raghuvir, her tyrannical parents, her annoying brother and take her away and keep her for himself. She was smiling as she thought of this fantasy. Butterflies waged wars in her tummy. Could this actually happen? The more she neared Dhruv’s room the more she started to believe in it. Why wouldn’t it happen after all? This was going to change everything. Things would get messy, ugly, irreparable, but that’s how love works, isn’t it? She breathed deeply. She was ready for it.
She stood at the door of Dhruv’s room and knocked.
‘Go away,’ shouted Dhruv.
She knocked again.
‘GO AWAY!’
She knocked harder. She could hear shuffling inside. Her heart leapt. She would keep it short and simple.
The door was opened by Dhruv, shirtless, which distracted Aranya for a few seconds.
‘Who’s that? What’s she doing here?’ said a voice from behind.
Aranya, who had imagined the worst by now, peeked behind Dhruv’s shoulder to see Ritika hiding her naked body behind a bed sheet. Damn. No. No. No. No. No. No. NO. NO. NO. NO.
Aranya ran as fast as her legs could take her. She was hurtling towards the training and placement department like a slingshot comet, trying not to cry when she became aware of Dhruv almost strolling and yet overtaking her.
‘Just. Stop.’
‘Get lost.’
‘What were you doing there?’ asked Dhruv, blocking her way.
‘Dhruv, you need to get out of my way.’