by Emma Quinn
Those words came out a little more judgmental than I meant them too, but I couldn’t help it. How could he act like he was someone else these days when he was in the middle of a wild party keeping me up at night.
“You are the same, Jake, and you always will be. Look at you, having yet another self-entitled party, not caring about who you affect and keep up at night. That makes you exactly the same was before in my book. I don’t see how you can think that you are any different. You haven’t ever needed to work at anything, so you don’t…”
“No, that isn’t me.” I tried to move away but he grabbed on to my arm hard. “Not anymore. I know that this isn’t the best example, but I didn’t throw this party. My friends threw it together as a surprise. I didn’t even know that it was going to happen, and I will admit that it’s gotten a bit loud and out of control, but it’s only one night…”
I rolled my eyes and snorted. “It’s always just one night, until it ends up ruining my college work. I can’t fail here, Jake. I don’t think you understand how important this is to me, but I can’t lose it. I can’t fail because I don’t have a future without it. I need this internship, I need good grades, I chose to live alone to make that happen…”
Jake’s eyes flickered with sadness and I could tell that I was getting to him, but it wasn’t enough for him to throw this party out of the water. He was never going to stop being trouble, and I was never going to like trouble.
“I don’t have everything handed to me on a plate, Mila,” he told me sadly. “Not like you think. You don’t get me like you think you do. I don’t think I’m the person you have in your mind. You don’t know me well enough.”
I wasn’t sure what to make of that, but I wasn’t sure I wanted to know either. I was already in too deep with him right now and we had only been in the same room for a short while. He had some strange effect on me and I couldn’t explain it. I had to assume that it was because we had a history, even if it wasn’t the best one. But just because we had a history, it didn’t mean that we needed to act like we were still friends. Not a chance in hell.
“I just want this party over, Jake,” I whined to him. “I don’t want to dance or join in. I don’t need a heart to heart with you because like I said before, we weren’t ever friends. I don’t think that’s something we need to rectify right now. I think I just need this party over so I can get my freaking application form done.”
“I don’t think that my friends will be too happy if I kick everyone out now.” He shrugged one shoulder in my direction. “I don’t want to upset everyone when they have put in such an effort for me.”
“Great, so I can’t do it.” Tears flooded my eyes. “I need to do my form and I can’t.”
“You can’t do it in the morning? It has to be done right now? I hate being a dick, but… well, I can’t end this party. I’m sorry, Mila. Not yet. I can make it quieter for you if that works out, but I can’t end it…”
“No, I can’t do it in the morning,” I shot back, the biting coming out in my tone. “I want to do it now. I want it ready to go in the morning. You would understand that if you didn’t have everything handed to you on a plate.”
He could act all hard fucking done by all her wanted, but I could see right through him. He hadn't changed one fucking bit and I had to assume now that he never would. And now I needed to live in the same building as him. Bull shit. I wanted to start again in college, to have a new life that didn’t include my past, but now…
“I need to get out of here.” I tossed my arms in frustration and stalked towards the door. “Fuck this.”
I knocked in to people during my storm out, causing a flurry of insults to follow me, but in all honesty I didn’t give a shit. I was so pissed off that nothing else mattered, only my fury. I was even considering calling the cops. Luckily, I had someone else to contact before I took that step, and she was still up and partying herself.
“Mila!” Ashley yelled, sounding excited. “Hey, girl, I was just going to call you but I thought it was too late…”
“Jake is here,” I stammered out, as the emotion really got to me. “He’s at the same college as me, in the same building. I can’t escape him. It’s a fucking nightmare, Ashley, what do I do? How do I get away from him?”
“Huh?” Of course, she couldn’t hear me because she was too busy partying. “What did you say?”
“Jake… he’s having a massive party and I can’t do what I want to. I have stuff to get done…”
It was pointless. She was at a party in a place that was too loud so she couldn’t hear me, and I was in a loud place as well. The whole apartment block might as well have been shaking with the sound. How was I the only one complaining? I suppose if everyone else was at the party then they wouldn’t care too much…
“Oh!” I was gob smacked, stunned in to silence as Jake followed through on what he promised me. The music turned all the way down so I could hear myself think at last. I could still hear the party of course, the people within the building, but I could probably get my application form completed if I wanted to. “Oh, it’s stopped.”
“I’m sorry, Mila. I just can’t hear you,” Ashley continued to yell. “What are you talking about? Is everything okay? Do you need me? Who has upset you because I will kick some ass if I need to…”
“No,” I replied idly, barely listening anymore. “No, you don’t need to kill anyone. I just… it’s been weird…”
“I still can’t hear what you’re saying and my friends are yelling me, Mila, I will call you tomorrow.”
She was gone in a heart beat, leaving me alone, but with a brain that I could now use to think. Wow, that was a surprise. The old Jake was arrogant and didn’t give a shit about anyone but himself, so perhaps he had grown up a little bit. Not that I was going to suddenly forgive him and see him in a brand new light.
I wouldn’t let that man in to my life, whoever he was these days. But I was grateful that I could get back to work and maybe even get some sleep tonight. That was a nice surprise. I needed to take advantage of this just in case the music turned back up again and I lost the ability to think once more. I smiled to myself, gratefully grabbing my form, and I got back down to it, thankfully feeling positivity once more.
10
Mila
I
stalked across the college campus with my books clutched tightly to my chest almost as a protective barrier so that no one got any funny ideas and wanted to talk to me. Since I knew that my cousin, Victoria, wasn’t around today, there wasn’t anyone else that I wanted to chat with. I didn’t like anyone else enough. Especially him.
Now that I knew Jake was at the same college as me, I couldn’t see to be able to avoid him. He was everywhere being as loud and as much as a center of attention as he always was, getting right on my nerves. I hadn't spoken to him in the past week since the night of the party, which thankfully petered off quickly as soon as the music turned down, and I didn’t have any reason to want to speak with him again. The more than I thought about it, the more it annoyed me that he was the one person who had followed me into my new life. Why not Ashley or someone nice?
“Mila!” Someone called out my name, a distinctly male voice which immediately struck me with fear. I hadn't yet come across Jake today but perhaps that was about to change. He didn’t seem to seek out conversation with me either, which I had been pleased about, but now I wasn’t so sure. Maybe that was about to change. “Mila, wait.”
I span slowly, my eyes sliding closed as I did because I didn’t want to see him. I wasn’t ready for everything that was about to happen even if I had no idea what it was. Trouble was about to come my way, I was sure of it.
“Oh my God, Mila, it really is you.” The tall, muscular, good looking figure who definitely wasn’t Jake came rushing over to me, making my heart stop beating. Who was this sexy man? Deep down, I knew, he was a blast from the past that I definitely wasn’t ever expecting to come across, but I couldn’t accept it yet. “I came
here looking for you, but I didn’t think that I would be able to find you so easily, yet here you are! I was just about to go to the library because that’s where you always were in high school. At least, that’s where you were before I left.”
“Brandon?” I whispered as I leaned into him. “Really, is this you? I don’t know what to say…”
Was it really Brandon? Was I hallucinating? My best friend, the boy that I loved, the person who I always envisioned spending the rest of my life with was here. On a normal, uneventful, grey, Tuesday afternoon.
“I know, this is wild, isn’t it?” he laughed. “I’m back in America at last. It’s been a long while, but I’m here.”
“You are.” I was frozen to the spot, unable to even react, just leaning into him. I wanted to get some comfort for this freaking massive man who used to be my best friend who I was secretly in love with. “You’re here.”
We didn’t get a chance to say goodbye, that was what killed me. I never got to even thank him for being my friend never mind let him know about my feelings before his father whipped him away from my life. To be honest, after the way that things went down, I thought that he would always stay in the UK. I never thought I would see him again. I certainly didn’t think that he would chance me down at college and seek me out for a reunion.
“How are you?” He pulled back to look at me and his eyes ran all over me. I had to admit that Brandon looked pleased to see me. “Oh my God, Mila, you don’t look any different at all. I don’t know what to say to you…”
“You look completely different.” I couldn’t get any words out, not really. “You changed.”
“I worked out a lot in England because I didn’t have any friends for a while.” He chuckled as if this was funny. “So I spent a lot of time in the gym. I wanted to change all of my life after everything that had happened. Leaving in such a shocking way really changed things for me and I knew that I needed to be a brand-new person.”
“So, you re-invented yourself.”
Wow, and in one hell of a sexy way. My heart was absolutely hammering against my rib cage with nerves. If I thought that Brandon had an effect on me before… well, it was nothing compared to now. I might as well have been a freaking puddle at his feet. He could have mopped me right up. “And you did a good job. I didn’t even recognize you at first. Wow, Brandon… sorry that I’m not saying a lot, I’m just stunned.”
“We need booze,” he said decidedly. “I know this is a shock. I didn’t warn you in advance because I didn’t know that you would like me coming and I didn’t want to miss out on the chance to hang out again. But alcohol will help us to get over the shock and awkwardness. You don’t have anywhere to be, do you? No work to do?”
Of course I did. I had tons of work. I always had lots of work to get on with, but actually, the thought of hanging out with my old best friend again was really tempting and I couldn’t say no. “Yes, let’s go for a drink.”
I beamed from ear to ear as we walked to the nearest bar to grease the wheels and to have a good time. Jake had suggested that me and him bumping into one another was fate, but actually this had to be destiny intervening, didn’t it? Bringing me and Brandon back together again at a time when it really didn’t seem like we would ever see one another again, had to be for a reason. Maybe we were ready for one another now. Perhaps this was actually going to happen. My college work could get done at any time, I didn’t know how long I would get to see Brandon…
“So, going to England kinda worked out okay for you then?” I asked with a smile as I leaned in towards Brandon some more. The drink really was helping things and I felt like I was even acting a little bit flirty with him which was exciting. Absence had made the heart grow fonder and it seemed like my confidence had grown as well. “You blossomed in a lot of ways. It sucks that it happened in such a bad way, but if it worked out well…”
“I would have rather been here with you,” he commented with a nod. “But I think I was a bit lost here, wasn’t I? Trying to be someone that I wasn’t all the time which is how I ended up getting in trouble.”
Wow, that was something that I always wanted him to notice about himself but he never did… until now. I guess the distance might have been hard on us in the short term but was actually much better for us in the end.
“So, you are on the straight and narrow now then?” I chuckled. “And you did well in school.”
I was surprised to hear nothing back. He left that question hanging in the air and I didn’t feel compelled to push it further. We weren’t here to discuss what happened in high school anyway. That was in the past.
“Are you back for good? In America, I mean?” God, what would that mean if he was? Would it mean that we would finally get our chance? “Or are you just here for a fleeting visit? Here to see the family?”
“Definitely not here to see the family,” he bit back, anger lacing his tone. I guess he was still annoyed that his father had sent him away after the car crash. “I am back for good. That’s as far as my plan goes at the moment. I don’t know what I’m going to do here, but I’m glad to be home. Do I go to college? Do I get a job? I don’t know…”
I leaned across and stroked his arm gently. “Well, I for one am glad to have you around.”
God, no truer words had ever been spoken before. I didn’t even realize that I needed piecing back together until he did it. I knew that I always missed Brandon, but I never knew how much his vanishing act affected me.
“I’m glad to be back. I finally feel like I am at home. I even have a meeting about an apartment this afternoon and it isn’t too far away from your college campus, so I think that me and you can hang out some more.”
“I would like that.” I couldn’t stop myself from grinning. “We always did have a good time, didn’t we?”
“So much fun. That’s why I knew I had to find you the moment I returned. You were always the one person I had the best fun with, you’re the person that I missed most when I was in England. It’s always been you that I have thought of so of course I was going to do whatever I could to hunt you down immediately.”
There was a twinkle in his eye, something that struck me right at my core. I felt like his words were about to have my world spinning with happiness. He was here, he wanted to spend time with me, we were about to get things back on track. Our lives had diverged, just while we grew up, and now we could reconnect as adults with a brand new vibe between us, one that suggested he had missed more for more reasons than just the laughs that we once shared.
I couldn’t help but wonder where this new adulthood was going to take us…
11
Jake
“ Y
ou are going to be the one training me?” Mila ran her eyes all over me, that slight disgust underneath her nose. She wasn’t about going let go of her old notions of me no matter what I did. “Why would Victoria pick you?”
“You know Victoria?” I asked with a small smile playing on my lips. She might have been annoyed that I was going to be working with her on the student union bar, but training her as well, but I wasn’t. I thought that it would be fun. I had been wanting to speak to her ever since my party, trying to catch up with her on the college campus and in the hallways of our building, but I hadn't had a chance yet. Not until now anyway. “How do you know her?”
“She’s my cousin.” Mila folded her arms across her chest. “How do you know her? Through work?”
“Yep, I needed a job because I don’t have anything handed to me on a plate after all.” I shot her a thin smile. “I actually don’t have any money, my father cut me off years ago, and Victoria gave me a chance.”
She rolled her eyes. I didn’t think that Mila was about to believe me right now. “Fine, whatever. So, I guess there are times when me and you will be working together then. I should get used to that.”
“Yeah, and if it’s late nights then I can also give you a ride home since we live in the same building as well.”
I grinne
d and watched her face contort with discomfort. She wasn’t happy but I couldn’t have been more pleased to be honest. This was my chance to let her see more of me, to show her that I had changed. It showed that Mila was smart to be honest for not believing my words. She needed to see action from me. I got that.
“Okay, well come on then,” she sighed heavily. “It will get busy soon so you might as well show me what I need to know. I don’t want to look like an idiot in front of all of the students tonight.”
“Hmm.” I narrowed my eyes curiously at her. “I never saw you as someone who wants to be popular.”
She let out a snort of laughter. “No, it isn’t that at all. It’s because I want to not be noticed. I want to stay under the radar. I have had to take this job to afford my apartment, this isn’t because I want to be sociable or anything. I’m a classic introvert who would much rather be by myself getting on with my work than here.”
She hadn't changed. It was comforting to know that Mila hadn't changed because unlike me, she didn’t need to. There was absolutely no reason for her to change because she had it right from the start. I actually hoped that she would rub off on me a bit and encourage me even more because this college was my life line. It was a way for me to get away from the family who were disappointed in me now, and to make a good life of my own.
“So, you don’t want to do anything stupid because you don’t want to be talked about.”
“Exactly.” She nodded sharply. “So, get me up to scratch, will you? So, I can continue to hide.”
It made me smile that she didn’t want to be seen because there weren’t many people like that in the world. I found her attitude very refreshing. She wanted to prove herself for what she could do rather than who she knew and how she presented herself to the world. She wasn’t like anyone else and that intrigued me in so many ways.