by Tia Louise
He waves a hand and goes to what looks like a fireplace. “There’s always an adjustment period following a change.” I watch as he holds his hands out, as if warming them by an invisible fire. Blue flames appear, dancing in the black hole, and he turns to me and smiles. “In any case, you know it’s there when you’re ready.”
My arms are bare. Cold covers them like a second skin, and I’m sure the flames are drawing the heat from the air. I shiver, and he returns to me.
“Here.” He lifts a filmy shawl from the back of a chair and wraps it around my shoulders. “It’s too soon, but I look forward to the return of that old spark. I miss your humor, my love. My little cabbage.”
My chest clenches, but I fight my tears. I have to hold on to hope. Koa will find a way. I won’t be trapped in this cold, dark prison forever. I will get back to my life and my dreams. I will find a way back to the sun.
18
Helpers
Koa
The trickle of water is in my ears. I’m cold, and I’m lying on a hard surface. Blinking my eyes, I sit up and look around, confused. I don’t know where I am or how I got here. The light is dimmer than it was before, but I can see I’m in a cave. I’m leaning against the wall, and I seem to be alone.
With considerable effort, I recall the man by the lake watching me. Again, a wave of dread moves across my stomach as I recall his face, his menacing expression. He was familiar—the identity so close, I can almost place him. Before I can do that, however, I have to remember why I’m here.
Clearly, I’m in a dark underworld. I’m cut off from the sun, but I’m not dead. Looking at my hands, I turn them over and stare at the backs of them. Making fists feels familiar. I’m a fighter. I can fight my way out of here, only I don’t know who to fight.
A scratchy hiss cuts through the silence, causing me to lift an elbow in defense. “Why have you come here, panther?” It asks me.
Straining my eyes in the darkness, I long to shift so I can see using my cat eyes. “Who are you?” My voice is strong and clear.
The stranger coughs and a shuffling noise above my head focuses my attention.
“Strong one, you are,” it rasps. “Haven’t heard a note that pure in centuries.”
“Where am I?” I don’t have time for games. I might not remember what brought me here, but my sense of urgency remains strong.
“Haven’t you figured that out for yourself?” More shuffling in the dark. “You’re in the underworld. Only, you ain’t dead yet.” A wicked cackle makes my skin crawl.
“I’m here for a reason,” I insist.
“A reason?” The voice is skeptical. “And what might that be?”
Forcing my mind to think, I encounter only mist. It’s as though I’ve taken a strong sedative, and I can’t shake off the hangover. “I can’t seem to remember—”
“Ahh, you drank from the Lethe. That’s good. Without your memories, you’ll adapt faster to your life here.”
“No,” shaking my head, I try again. “I’m not staying here. I’m here for something important. Something I lost…”
“Death is as important as life. You’re here now, panther, and here you’ll stay. No one leaves the underworld.”
Rubbing my face with both hands, I fight the growl rising in my chest. Frustration twists me hard, and I want to fight. My fists are back. I might not remember the details, but I know this is wrong. I’m not here to stay. I’m here to save something then I’m getting the fuck out.
“Who are you?” I demand of the voice.
“No one of consequence.” More scratching noises above my head. “I’m here to keep you company.”
The voice is closer, but it seems to also be growing smaller. I begin to suspect I’m talking to a mouse or some other small creature. “Are you an animal?”
“No, panther. I’m not like you.” It’s near me now, on the wall of the cave, and I move away from it.
“What is your form? Tell me what sort of creature you are.”
“Shh…” The air seems to have closed in on me. Ribbons of cold filter down inside my skull. “Calm. Don’t vex yourself.”
“Why are you here with me? What is your name?”
“Some call me Hypnos, but I prefer Poppy.” The voice is no longer raspy. It’s smooth, a soothing monotone. “Relax. Listen to the water as it ripples past us. It’s like the purr of a cat. The sound you make in utter contentment.”
My eyes are heavier with each word. I’m unable to fight him off, but I don’t understand. “I’m not tired. I only just awoke.”
“You’ve had a long journey, traveler. Rest your weary head. Nothing will happen until you awake again.”
It’s a trick. I have to fight this spell. He’s bewitching me, and I have to fight against him. Only it’s no use. Even as I think the words, I feel my brain shutting down. The heaviness is back, and again, I can’t fight it.
“Who told you to keep me company?” It’s the last question I utter before the mist surrounds me, stealing my consciousness.
Mercy
Hayden has invited me to go for a walk with him. We’re out of the castle on a wide path strolling through a forest of black, grey, and sepia. Somewhere far above my head, I hear the rushing of water.
Beside me, he’s in his black armor. The cape is back as is the crown. I’m wearing a different chiffon dress, spring green this time. It’s long and flowing to compliment his attire. My hair hangs in dark tendrils down my back.
“You’re so beautiful.” He cocks his head to the side with a smile. “We go so well together here.”
“I would never wear something like this.” How easily I slip back into fighting him.
“You’re also not wearing your crown.” The slightest hint of disappointment is in his voice.
I confess, I wondered if my feelings for him would change when I was in his world. If seeing him as a ruler would make him annoy me less. I wondered if I might gradually fall for his attractive face and elegant manner.
Not happening.
“Tell me about my aunts,” I say instead. “The others you took.”
A grin touches his lips. “Haven’t we had this conversation before?”
“Yes, but now that I’m here, I’m want more details. How they lived with you, what they did.”
My statement seems to please him. “Which one are you interested in?”
“Both of them. Start at the beginning.” Pushing my hair back, I count on my fingers. “I’m number three, which means two went before me. Cora was first?”
A slow inhale, and he nods. “Cora was my favorite so far, although I’ve told you that already.”
“She wanted to be here with you. She fell in love with you.”
“Yes,” he sighs, and I glance up at him. His head is bowed, and true grief flickers in his eyes before disappearing. “When she first arrived, she wasn’t happy with the arrangement. However, it only took a week before she changed her mind.”
“A week?” I find that hard to believe. “Had you already been visiting her like you did with me?”
“We had no Thursday night dinners, if that’s what you mean.”
“Still, you built the house for her.” I’m thinking back to what Koa told me. “Why did you do it?”
“The house wasn’t for her. She was worried about leaving her family.”
“You didn’t care about them?”
“I only cared for her happiness.” He stops and looks away from me. “It was her father who killed my wife. I would never forgive him for it.”
“But you built a mansion for him to live in. A luxurious, palatial mansion.”
“I built it for her.” His tone is sharp, as if he’s becoming agitated. “She wouldn’t be happy unless she knew they were safe and cared for. Your family had nothing, still has nothing, but you can thank Cora for that house and the servants and the cars and whatever the hell else they wanted.”
Thank you, Cora, I say internally, not that I wanted any of it. “Why do yo
u say they? I lived there, too.”
“I wanted you to have those things.” The warmth in his voice unsettles me.
“You never answered my question,” I resume walking. “If there were no Thursday night dinners, how did you see her before?”
“We would meet in the woods.”
I look around these frozen, grey woods. Twisted tree limbs look like dragon’s heads, and damp lizards peer down at us through dark green ivy. “You met in the woods on Earth, and she was happy with this?”
“She liked the lake. She liked… being with me.”
My voice is quiet when I ask. “How long were you together?”
Another deep breath. “You do have the most inquisitive mind.” He’s irritated, and I wonder why. “We don’t mark time here the way you do above. Still, I suppose if we did, she would have been with me what you call one hundred years.”
My eyes blink wide. “That’s a very long time.”
“We were very happy.”
Guilt isn’t the correct term for how I feel for Hayden in this moment. It’s more empathy. I know the pain of missing a loved one. My body aches with longing for Koa. I see his green eyes in my sleep, and I dream of his strong arms holding me close, carrying me out of this place.
All at once, my memories are split by a terrifying snarl. Out of nowhere the heart-stopping noise of a roaring growl rips through the silent woods.
“Hayden!” I scream, but it all happens so fast.
A horrible, three-headed beast with blazing red eyes races out of the gloom. I run to a tree. It’s nearly on me, and the noise of teeth champing is right behind me.
“NO!” I scream again, bracing for the ripping pain of a bite. I’m close to shifting as I push my feet against the tree trunk, climbing fast. More growls and snapping. It’s my worst nightmare—a pack of wild dogs.
Grasping at a limb, I don’t care what I might touch. I have to get higher. The thing’s breath is at my heels, and I hear the loud scratch of its huge claws as it tries to climb after me.
Through the din, Hayden’s voice is a sharp command. “Cerberus, HEEL!”
At once the violence stops. My entire body is shaking. I still hear heavy breathing and low rumbles of the monster’s growls as it exhales, but I’m high in the black tree looking down on the gruesome, three-headed dog.
“Stop this,” Hayden soothes, sliding his pale hand down one sleek black head. The heads are compact and square like a Rottweiler’s, as is the body. The entire thing is black and sleek, and murder burns in its eyes.
“She’s your new mistress,” Hayden continues, walking to where I’m hiding in the tree. “Come down, darling. He won’t hurt you now.”
“No, thank you.” I push my feet against the limbs and move higher in my perch. The horrible beast’s tail slashes around it like a whip, and its long claws are out as it stamps its feet in impatience.
“Mercy, I said he won’t harm you. Come down.”
“I’m not coming down until it’s gone.”
Hayden stands for a moment looking up at me in his black armored suit, black robe and bone crown with the hound of hell at his side. I am utterly terrified. Finally, he relents.
“Cerberus, go.” He commands the thing in a casual voice, and it immediately responds, dropping two of the heads before turning with a slash of that whip-tail and bounding away.
I stay in the tree several moments longer watching and listening. Hayden’s eyes have never left me.
“Will you come down now?” He asks gently. “I forgot cats and dogs don’t mix.”
Relaxing my grip on the limbs, I slowly make my way down. The dress is ripped, and black smudges like soot are on my feet and thighs from my climb.
“I wouldn’t call that thing a dog.” I grumble once my feet touch the ground.
“I probably should have warned him you were coming.”
If that’s a joke, I’m not laughing. I feel like I’ll be sick from the residual panic and fear. “I want to go back to the castle.”
He sighs and holds a hand out in the direction we came. I walk quickly ahead of him the entire way. We don’t speak, and I know he’s watching me. My breath is fast, and the quick pace of my stride helps with my jumping nerves.
Only my mind can’t relax. All I can think of is Koa facing that thing, and what a fool I was to think Hayden wouldn’t have guards and creatures to protect him here.
Getting out of this place just got a million times harder.
19
Deep Magic
Koa
Time is passing. Every time I awake, my companion is with me speaking about things I don’t understand. He asks me each day if I remember why I’m here, and he’s always happy when I can’t recall who I am or why I’m in this hole. Rubbing my face, my beard is longer.
“How long have I been here?” I ask in the darkness.
“Time doesn’t exist here,” he rasps. “You’ve lost the grip of mortality.”
I’m losing my grip on sanity, but I struggle to hold on. “If we counted days, how long would you say?”
“I’ve been here forever, panther.”
A knot forms in my throat at his reply. “Are others here with us?”
“Others come, others go. I’m never alone for long.”
His non-answers make me insane. I’ve got to try a different approach. “What do you do for fun, Poppy?”
“Fun?” It’s a high rasp, almost a laugh. Then he mutters under his breath, his voice scratching in that way that makes me want to clear my throat. “No one’s ever asked me that before.”
“Before you came to this place, what were you? What did you do?”
“I told you. I’ve always been here.”
“In this cave?”
I feel movement around me, close by my head. It causes me to flinch. “A cave…” He seems to be pondering the words. “You think this is a cave?”
“What is it?”
“We’re in your mind.”
Fear twists my insides. Visions of being underground, of being buried alive tighten my throat. Have I gone crazy? I’m sure I’m still sitting, but I move my arms for the first time in what seems like a long time. Touching my body, I feel jeans on my legs. I’m wearing a thin shirt and a leather jacket.
Spanning my arms to the sides, I reach around in the darkness, but I don’t feel anything. I don’t encounter any boards or bodies. Putting my hands down beside me, I touch the cold, damp earth. I still hear the trickle of water as if running down the side of a cave.
“You’re in my mind?” I ask, needing clarification. “So you don’t exist?”
“Oh, I exist.” His voice has become a hiss. “Soon you’ll no longer exist. You don’t even remember who you are. Eventually, you’ll stop fighting the inevitable.”
Full-on panic hits me then. I reach for my jacket, feeling the chest, pockets. Something must be in it to tell me who I am. I’ll see it, and I’ll remember. I know I will.
Empty. My pockets are empty. Poppy’s soft chuckle is in my ears, and I know he’s watching me.
A low growl comes from deep in my belly. Feeling inside the coat, I find it has small pockets against my chest.
“Ha!” My breath gushes out as I make contact with something hard in one of them. Pulling it out, it’s a small vial. By the way it feels and its rubber cap… My hope falters. It’s useless.
“FUCK!” I shout, and Poppy laughs more. His sickening cackle almost pushes me over the edge.
“I already checked your pockets, panther.”
I hate his disembodied voice. I want to kill him. I’m about to throw the small vial across the dark hole when I feel a strange urge. Running my fingers over the glass, it’s as if a voice is telling me to do something. I hear nothing but the trickle of water and the rasp of my companion. Still, I’m being implored. It doesn’t make sense. At the same time, none of this makes sense.
Hesitating, I try to look around once more. I don’t know if this is Poppy manipulating my mind aga
in or if it’s something else. It feels different from Poppy’s influence. Using the edge of my fingernail, I flick off the black cap and drink it fast.
“What are you doing?” For the first time, I hear fear in my companion’s voice.
Flashes of light go off behind my eyes. I see sunlight hitting the waves of water. I see a body, the beautiful pearl-white of a smile. Dark hair sweeps around my shoulders in waves. I inhale the scent of fresh air and warm woods. Mercy.
My strength comes back in a rush. Blinking hard, I can see. Grey light reveals I’m not in a cave. I’m sitting in a burned-out wood with my back against the damp trunk of a tree.
Movement whispers above me, and I lift my chin. I shout when my eyes clash with pale ones just over my head. He’s wrapped around the tree above me like a snake, and one hand is stretched out, touching my head. Reflexively, I slap his arm away, and I see long claws retract from my skull. A whisper moves through my hair as his long talons release my brain.
I’m on my feet at once facing him. “What kind of demon are you?” I growl, ready to rip him limb from limb.
“Only the demon sent to guard you.” He draws back and quickly slithers into the branches above. “Goodbye, panther.”
Lunging forward, I try to grab his retreating tail, but I’m too late. He’s gone in the darkness of the branches, most likely all the way to the top. It’s a massive elm.
“I’m Koa!” I shout after him. “Tell your master I’m here, and I’m coming for her.”
No use hiding it. Clearly, Hayden already knows I’m here if he’s sent his slaves to hold me. Shaking away the fog in my brain, I remember him standing on the side of the river watching as I drank. I remember his sinister smile. Yes, he knows I’m here, and he thought he’d beaten me.
The small vial is still in my hand, and I look down at it. It was in my jacket pocket… Doris. If I ever get back, that old lady has a lot of explaining to do. For now, I’ve got to find Mercy. I don’t know how much time I’ve lost, and I don’t know how I’ll find her. At least I know I’m on the right track.