by Vella, Wendy
“But do you really have to? Tell me why you’re running.”
“No.” She eased back out of his arms. “Will you tell me what’s the deal with you and those scientists down there? I hear you talking about them and it sounds like more than just disliking what they do. It sounds personal.”
He owed her something, but did he want to go there?
“My ex was a scientist and specialized in genetic modification.”
“Samantha, right? So what? You hate them all just because of her?” Her blue eyes fixed on him.
“Not all of them,” he muttered. “I don’t like food being genetically modified, so shoot me.”
“That’s a narrow outlook, but we’ve covered that already. So she dumped you?”
“It’s a bit more complicated than that.” Noah looked away from her. “And it’s your turn to answer a question. Are you in danger?”
Her pause was telling to Noah. “What kind of danger?”
“There is more than one kind?”
“The someone wants you dead kind?” Noah persisted.
She looked away.
“Jesus, Lani. Can’t you go to the police or something? You can’t just keep running. What if whoever is chasing catches you?”
“You don’t think I’ve thought about that?” She jumped off his legs. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore. You need to go. I’ve said too much.”
“Why? So you can pack and run again?”
She spun to glare at him. Hands on her trim hips, she stalked back toward him. Noah got off the bed and went to meet her.
“You don’t know anything about this, and what’s more, you’re never going to. You just live here holding your grudge against the entire gene modifying scientific community, and pretty soon I’ll be a distant memory.”
“I’m not holding a grudge on the entire community—”
“Sure sounds that way.”
“You don’t understand.”
“No, just like you don’t understand about me.”
“Make me understand, then.”
“No.”
They glared at each other.
“She was pregnant.” He wasn’t sure who was more shocked by his words, him or her.
“Who? Your ex, Samantha?”
Noah nodded. “We were going to have a baby and the doctor told her to slow down when she started bleeding. She did, but the day I walked into her office and found her bleeding, she’d been carrying around heaving boxes.”
“Oh God, Noah, I’m sorry.”
Lani had never willingly touched him before, so the fingers she ran down his cheek were a surprise.
“Sorry.” She pulled back.
“Why? I like your touch.” Noah grabbed her hand and held it on his chest. “She miscarried at four months, and I know it’s not her fault any more than it was mine. We both wanted that baby, but I think I blamed her, and she blamed me for getting her pregnant. We didn’t last long after that.”
“So you lost her and the baby?”
He felt the sting of pain in his chest and the bitter taste of acid in his throat at the memory of that time. He didn’t handle it well. It had been Newman and Buster who had come for him and brought him home. Faith had told them to do it, and they hadn’t hesitated.
“And you’re still mourning them.”
“No. Not her. I lost any feeling I had for Samantha ages ago. I don’t feel any anger toward her about the baby, she was devastated too, and I even realize now it was no one’s fault. But I do have a hang up about scientists that I can’t seem to change.”
“But the baby, have you mourned the loss of it?”
“There was nothing to mourn.” He was the one who wanted to walk away now, stepping back and away from the pain he still felt over the loss of his child. Lani followed, wrapping her arms around his waist and holding him tight.
“There was the loss of a dream, Noah. You would have built a life with that child. Built a future that was taken from you and it. That is worth mourning.”
For the first time, he realized her words for the truth. They’d thought of names and what he and his child would do together. Dreams that he’d wanted to fulfil.
“Losing someone you love so quickly is devastating and hard to come to terms with. But to lose a child that has yet to live….” Her words fell away.
“Yes,” Noah rasped. “It was hell.” He whispered the words he’d never spoken before.
“Let the anger go, Noah, and the grief. It will eat you up otherwise.”
He pressed her close, wrapping his arms around her body. Christ, she felt good, and right. He never wanted to let her go.
They stood there in silence, and he let the memories of that time come and go. He slowly remembered the dreams and anger that he’d pushed into a dark corner deep inside his head. The joy, then devastation. The numbness and grief. Finally he acknowledged what he’d felt and lost.
“Thank you.” His words were hoarse.
“Your friends and Faith would have helped you with this, Noah.” She said the words into his shoulder, and it was instinctive for him to brush his lips over her head.
“They would have if I had let them in. They knew, of course; that was never a secret. But not how much pain I carried inside.”
“It’s not good to keep stuff bottled up.”
“Says the woman who has more secrets than a government agency.”
She sighed, the warmth of her breath brushing his arm.
“Will you let me help you, Lani? Will you tell me who you’re running from?”
“No. It’s too dangerous, and I’ve told you more than anyone else and that’s wrong. So leave it alone, Noah. Please.”
“Dangerous to who? Me or you?”
“Both.”
“I have lots of friends, Lani, who are now your friends. Let us help you.”
“No. This conversation ends here.”
“Cubby and Katie could help.”
“No!” She backed away from him. “I need to handle this on my own, Noah.” She turned and ran to the bathroom. The door slammed in his face as he reached it.
“Dammit, Lani. I just want to help.” He thumped his fist hard on the wood.
“You can’t, nobody can.” Her words were muffled and sounded thick with tears. He hated that she was in there crying and he couldn’t get to her. He could break the door down, and thought seriously about it, but that would just draw people up here, and she would hate that.
“You are not running away!” He banged a fist on the door again but she didn’t reply.
Buddy’s claws clacked on the floor, signaling his approach. He pressed his face into Noah’s leg. He bent at the waist and gave him a hug. “You look after your lady for me, Buddy, and don’t let her out of your sight, okay?”
The dog made the noise Mrs. C had told Noah was now called “wuffling”.
Because he needed to get back to the Howler and Lani couldn’t leave as the road was closed, he left. But he’d be watching her for signs that she was preparing to run. He’d get Mrs. C on the case. Somehow, he needed to get Lani to open up to him. He had to help her, because she couldn’t keep running indefinitely, and because he had to admit, if only to himself, he cared for this woman. He wasn’t sure how deep those feelings ran or what he wanted to do about them, but he could no longer deny they were there.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Two days had passed since the festival, and Lani was still here in Lake Howling. Mrs. C had hurt her back and taken to her bed, according to Hank, which meant Lani couldn’t leave because there would be no one to run the Howlery or bake and decorate the cakes.
Flipping over, she looked at her cellphone, which told her it was 2:00 a.m. A cold, wet nose pressed into her neck.
“It’s okay, Buddy, I just can’t sleep.” She wrapped an arm around the dog and hugged him closer. Bandit was pressed into her belly. Lani had never had pets, and now realized what she’d been missing out on. In a matter of a few weeks they’
d become important to her. So important, she let them sleep on the bottom of her bed. Not easy considering Buddy’s size, and often she woke with numb feet because he was lying across them.
“We will need to leave soon though, boy.” She pressed her face into his fur.
She’d monitored newspapers and current affairs bulletins, but there had been no pictures of her. Noah’s story had been good, but thankfully there had been no footage of her.
He’d kept his distance, and Lani was pleased about that. He disturbed her, and that disturbance had climbed to another level now that he knew things about her. Noah had no concrete facts except that she was on the run from danger. She knew he couldn’t find anything out about her because she’d changed her name, but still, it was unsettling.
He knew she wasn’t who she appeared to be… or was she? Lani had almost forgotten the person she’d been before her parents died, and then he’d come into her life.
She heard a loud bang downstairs and then muffled voices. One thing having someone wanting you dead had taught her was to always be prepared. Slipping out of bed, she quickly pulled on the clean clothes she laid out each night. Until she came to Howling, her clothes had never been unpacked. But she still kept the things that were important to her existence in her backpack beside the bed.
She heard another bang. Pulling on her cap, she grabbed her backpack and went down the stairs, heart thumping. Stopping to grab the skillet Mrs. C cooked Hank’s grilled cheese sandwiches on, Lani opened the door slowly. Just enough to see outside. Leaving off the lights allowed her to see better.
“What the fuck, Tex. Look where you’re walking.”
She knew that voice. Lani lowered the skillet to the bench. Opening the door wider, she slipped out, shutting Buddy in behind her. She found three men behind Noah’s car.
“What are you doing out here at this hour?”
“Christ!” Ethan grabbed his chest as he leapt a foot in the air. “Hell, Lani, you scared the crap out of me.”
Brad, Noah, and Ethan all wore dark colors. Tex had black stripes like a linebacker on both cheeks.
“Sorry, but you were making enough noise to wake up the entire town.”
“That’s all on him,” Noah said, nodding at Tex. “Because he hasn’t had his eight hours, he can’t function like a normal adult.”
“I’m normal, just tired.”
“But what are you all doing out here dressed like that?”
“Nothing. Go back to bed, Lani,” Noah said, not meeting her eyes.
“Are you going to commit a crime or something?”
“Or something,” Brad muttered. “I can’t believe I let them talk me into this.”
“Yes, you can, this is about our future, and the fact Noah is giving us free drinks for the next month, plus a meal on the house,” Tex added.
“Will you two shut up and get in the car.” Noah sounded frustrated.
“Where are you going?”
“Since you gave Jake the test results, he’s been determined to uncover who laced that stuff Mikey smoked. Add to that it was someone who knew what they were doing, and Noah added five and nine together and came up with 115, which led him to the people in those shade houses.”
Noah made a sound like he was in pain when Tex finished talking. “Well, aren’t you just a Chatty Cathy now you’ve woken up! “Get in the car, Geldermans, or so help me God, I’m hurting one of you.”
The Texans muttered something unfavorable and climbed in.
“What’s going on, Noah?”
“Nothing. Go back to bed.”
She moved to stand between him and the driver door.
“Move, Lani.”
“Are you going to break into that place?”
He didn’t speak, just stared at her.
“I can’t believe you’d be that reckless.”
“Says the woman who has been recklessly running from town to town for four years.”
Heat filled Lani’s cheeks. “That’s different.”
“Possibly, but I’ve made up my mind, so move, or I’ll move you.”
Lani wasn’t a rash decision maker, couldn’t afford to be. Okay, so she’d run that night and not stopped, but since then she’d carefully planned each move she’d made. Each destination was thoroughly thought through. Clearly she wasn’t thinking with her usual accuracy right at this moment.
“What are you doing?”
“Coming with you.” Lani ran around the hood and got in the back seat beside Brad.
“No.” Noah walked to the door she’d just slammed and tried to wrench it open. He failed because she’d locked it. “Open the door.”
“No.”
“Brad, open the door.”
“An extra pair of eyes can only help, Noah.”
The security lights showed her he was furious. His eyes narrowed as he bent to glare at her through the window.
“You—” He jabbed at the glass hard.
“That had to hurt,” Tex said.
“—are a fucking liability.”
“That was harsh and rude. Lady present, bud,” Brad added.
Noah stalked around the car and got in the driver side, slamming the door behind him. He then fired up the car and crawled out of the lane behind the shops.
“That was a letdown,” Tex said.
“What?” Noah snapped at him.
“I thought you’d burn rubber out of here.”
“Mr. and Mrs. Milden are sleeping above their shop at the moment while they renovate.” The words were clipped and cold.
“That’s nice of you then, being all considerate and stuff,” Brad said, and Lani knew he and his brother were deliberately needling Noah.
“I’m about an inch away from losing my shit. Be warned.”
“So we still have an inch,” Brad mused. “Give me a minute, I’ll get you there.”
Lani couldn’t help it, she started laughing. Granted, it was a nervous laugh, but it felt good. The Texans joined her, and she noted Noah’s lips twitch.
“I need to tell you something,” Lani said when they fell silent.
“Shoot,” Brad said. “But if it makes Ethan cry, it won’t be pretty.”
“It’s true, I’m an ugly crier.”
“Shut up and let the woman talk,” Noah gritted out.
“When I was sleeping in my car—”
“No way, were you?” Brad said.
“I know you all know, because no one in this town can keep a secret,” Lani said.
“True. Okay, carry on with your story,” Tex said.
“I went to find Buddy one morning because he wouldn’t come back when I called.”
“Dogs can be naughty like that,” Tex added.
“Will you shut up!” Noah roared.
“You wouldn’t think we were doing him a favor,” Brad said.
“Anyway,” Lani continued before Noah exploded. “I found Buddy by this big camouflage net, and under it was a huge green tent that looked like a shade house.”
“Well now, that’s interesting,” Tex said, the smile on his face replaced by a mean look. “Somewhere big enough to grow something illegal, do you think, Lani?”
“I do.”
“And you’re just telling us now?” Noah glared at her.
“Sorry.”
“It’s okay, you told us, and that’s all that matters,” Brad said, shooting Noah a warning look.
“You will not leave this car, Lani. You can be the lookout when we get there.”
“That hardly seems fair. I’m the smallest here. Surely I can get into places you behemoths can’t?”
“You will do as you’re told.”
Lani knew when she was pushing her luck, so she fell silent.
“And what the hell is that shit on your face, Tex?” Noah added.
“Camouflage. Annabelle thought it looked hot on me.”
“She was lying to you. You look like an idiot.”
“I told him that,” Brad said. “He’s always been
the type to get fully into any role he’s playing.”
“I should have been on the stage, really.”
“Dad would have loved that,” Brad said, which set the Geldermans laughing again.
“So what is the plan?” Lani asked.
“The plan for you is that you stay in the car. We,” he pointed from him to the Geldermans, “will break in and look around the place.”
“Do you know what you’re looking for?”
“I know what those lab tests came back with and can read labels.”
“Right. So it will just be there in a bottle marked ‘stuff to lace marijuana with so it messes with people’ right there on a shelf for you to find.”
“I didn’t say that.” Noah’s patience was clearly being tested. “I’ve wanted to see inside those houses for a while now, and this is the chance. If I find evidence someone in there is also tampering with the marijuana and selling it to locals, that would be a win in my book.”
“My best friend is a scientist. I used to spend time in her lab. She told me all kinds of things while I was writing up her notes. I could probably find what you’re looking for better than you can.”
“No.”
Lani could feel the Texans looking from her to Noah.
“Being bullheaded is helping no one and won’t get us any closer to finding who nearly put Mikey in a hospital.”
“She has a point, to be fair,” Brad said.
“No, she doesn’t. We’re intelligent men, we can do this without her help.”
“Okay, so this is about the male ego then, and not actually getting the facts you need.”
“Shut up, Lani.”
“Sorry, he’s cranky.” Tex smiled. It was a really nice smile, she had to concede.
“I’m not cranky, and she shouldn’t even be in this car!”
“You sound cranky.”
“You should park further down the road and we’ll double back,” Brad said.
“You think?”
“Now, now, Noah. Only trying to help. After all, we’re here, aren’t we, because Newman said he couldn’t afford bail if Cubby arrested him, plus Hope has a stomach bug. Jake is on call, and Buster can’t leave Willow.”
“Just how wealthy are you two?” Lani looked at the brothers. “I’ve heard rumors.”
“Obscenely so.”