“Hah, it feels like it sometimes. Well, not the movement parts obviously, but the part where it’s sucking all my energy.”
I’ve had so much fun with Lauren all day, enjoying her company, that I didn’t think about the reason we were together. Now that I’m thinking about babies again, my head is spinning. I hold tighter onto Lauren, anchoring myself. “Do you want a girl or a boy?”
“I don’t care as long as it’s healthy. What about you?”
“I don’t care either, though I think it’s a girl.”
Lauren lifts her head off my chest and looks into my eyes. “I wonder who he or she will look like.”
“This is so weird,” I blurt. What’s even weirder is my imagination getting ahead of me, and I’m seeing this play out like it was planned, like Lauren loves me as much as I’ve loved her, and we’re ready and excited to embark on this stage of life together.
What the fuck is wrong with me?
“It is.” Lauren lays her head back down and turns her attention back to the movie. I run my hands up and down her arms, bare skin under my fingers. Goosebumps break out along her flesh, so I sit up to grab the blanket that’s on the back of the couch. We resituate close together, blanket draped over us both.
Lauren turns, probably to say something to me, but I don’t give her the chance. I move in, putting my lips to hers. Time stops and it’s just us, just this kiss.
I can’t get close enough.
I can’t stop kissing her.
It’s like I’m that sixteen-year-old boy, feeling the effects of teenage love at first sight all over again, ten years later.
Only this time, she’s feeling it too.
Lauren moves into my lap, straddling me. We kiss with fury, and soon I’m laying her down on the couch, moving between her legs. She rakes her nails down my back and grabs the hem of my shirt, yanking it up halfway then stopping.
“Noah,” she groans. “We … we … oh fuck.”
My lips are on her neck, and she likes it. Really likes it. Her legs widen and wrap around me.
“Noah,” she starts again and puts her hands on either side of my head. “We shouldn’t do this.”
I let out a breath and nod. “Okay, if that’s what you want.”
“It’s what I need,” she whispers. “I want you.”
Worst possible words, Lauren. Thanks for that. With great control, I move off of her, and we cuddle together again. If Lauren wants three dates, I’ll wait. Hell, I’ll wait if she wants thirty dates. I’ll do whatever it takes.
Chapter 11
LAUREN
“IT’S BEEN MORE than three dates,” Noah reminds me as we sit down at dinner after seeing a movie. I ate pretty much the entire bucket of popcorn and I’m fucking starving again.
“I know,” I say, picking up the menu. I want my freaking hamburger. Now. And salty French fries and strawberry lemonade.
“So, that means I get some tonight, right?”
I look up into Noah’s blue eyes, falling under the spell of his sexy grin. The word “yes” wants to roll off my tongue. Actually, I want my tongue all over him.
“You said it takes good food to get into your pants,” he continues. “And I think we should fuck a few times before you get a baby belly. That’ll be a little awkward.”
I raise an eyebrow. “I’m only twelve weeks. It’ll be a while before I get a bump that big. And you’re making it really easy to say no.” I’m lying through my teeth. With hormones raging through me and all the time we’ve spent together the last three weeks, I’m horny as fuck and want nothing more than to feel him on top of me, kissing me as he drives his big cock in and out, rocking me into oblivion.
“Come on, throw me a bone.”
“You have hands, don’t you?”
“Yeah, but Rosie and her four sisters don’t compare.”
Should I give him credit? We’ve been dating for about a month now and I cut him off after several minutes into a makeout session, like a teenager afraid of getting caught by her parents. He hasn’t complained too much, and never once pushed me. Actually, every time he begrudgingly moves off me, I feel deeper for him. I know this is the longest he’s gone without sex since only God knows when, yet he’s still here, still with me. He’s trying. He cares. He wants to make this work.
And so do I.
We’ve spent a lot of time together over the last few weeks, and I feel like I’m seeing the real Noah. There’s more to him than tattoos and motorcycles, but I’m still working to find out why he puts up that front.
He sighs. “I think sleeping together is a good way to see if we’re really compatible. People in relationships do fuck, you know.”
I roll my eyes and look back at the menu. Do I want bacon on my hamburger? What the fuck? Why am I even asking myself that? Of course I want bacon. Maybe extra bacon. Yes, definitely extra bacon.
“Sex complicates things.”
Noah lets out a deep laugh. “I think we’re past that.”
“Shut up,” I say with a smile, shaking my head. I don’t want to tell him that I’m scared sleeping with him will mess with my head. I’ve seen him naked and know he’s a man I can easily get physically addicted to. I want my heart and soul to be addicted to him too.
I think they’re getting close.
“You are a prude,” he says with a hint of a smile. He’s teasing but also means it.
“Is that the way you’re going to talk to the mother of your unborn child?”
He twitches and exhales. “You’re making me.”
“Oh yeah, forcing you.”
“I wouldn’t have to ask if you put out.”
“I’m not that type of girl.”
He laughs. “Says the mother of my unborn child.”
“You’re insulting yourself by insulting me.”
“Dammit, you’re right.” He picks up his Coke and takes a drink. “Though I don’t really care. I am that type of guy. Was that type of guy. I’ve been good. I think I deserve a reward, like maybe let me touch your butt.”
I laugh, finding it harder to resist him. There is something so sexy about a man who can make you laugh. And Noah does, pretty much every time we are together. I like being with him. A lot. A whole fucking lot.
“Do you want to spend the night at my place?” he asks. “And I don’t expect anything,” he adds. “I just want to be with you. I like having you next to me at night even if all your fun parts are off-limits.”
“I do want to.” I have yet to stay overnight at his apartment, actually. “But it’s hard to leave the dogs overnight.”
“Bring them with,” he says.
“Can you even have dogs at your apartment? I don’t want to get yelled at.”
“I honestly don’t know and don’t care. If someone gets their panties in a wad about it, they can deal with me. No one is going to fuck with you, I promise.”
Yeah, that makes me smile. And realize that if we really do have a girl, she’s going to have one overprotective daddy.
We stop at my house after dinner. Noah plays with the dogs while I pack a bag. I grab my go-to Harry Potter PJs, and hesitate, Noah’s words echoing in my head. I want to look good for him. I might not sleep with him tonight, but my hand is gravitating to the back of my drawer, and I’m pulling out a rarely worn black silk and lace nightie. It has delicate thin straps and lace around the hems. It ends just below my ass cheeks. If I wear this, along with matching black lace undies of course, it’s because I want Noah to see me in it, which really means I want him to see me out of it.
And I must, because I shaved and shit.
I was a little afraid all the hair would clog the drain in the shower, but hey, if there is even a slight possibility of getting some, I don’t want to look like a wooly mammoth.
It has been several weeks of dating . And Noah is looking very fine tonight in distressed jeans, and a white T-shirt under his black leather jacket. Plus he smells good, and what the hell, I’m already pregnant.
Shut up, vagina.
You shall not rule here. Brain, quick, take over before I’m throwing myself at Noah in the living room. I grumble at myself and throw the sexy nighttime clothing in my bag anyway. I can decide what to do later.
Noah grabs my bag. “Ready?”
“Yeah. Just need the dogs.” We each take one, loading them into the car. I’ve only been to Noah’s a few times, since I’m a homebody and have dogs to take care of. Pulling into the parking lot tonight impresses me just as much as the first time. It’s three stories, dark red brick, and upscale. I’m starting to think I’ve been wrong about Noah for a long time. Though I can’t help but see the rough-and-tough bad boy when I look into his eyes. Only now he’s grown up a bit, and apparently has money.
Which makes him all the more dangerous.
He leads the way to his apartment, unlocks the door, and turns on the light, then steps aside to let me in first.
“Movie, shower, dessert, bed?” Noah asks as he takes off his shoes and coat. “And feel free to add sexy time anywhere in between those.”
I smile and shake my head. His cocky jokes are starting to seem charming. Dammit, Noah. What are you doing to me?
“What movie?” I ask, trying to ignore the warmth and longing that go through me, making their way from my heart to my lady bits.
“We’ll see what’s on.”
We take a few minutes to make popcorn and get the dogs settled down, then sit together on his leather couch. Noah flips through movie options, and settles for The Avengers.
“I love this one,” I say and bend my knees, tucking my feet under myself. It’s chilly in here and there are no blankets on the couch, like a typical bachelor pad.
“Really? I thought you only liked fru-fru Disney shit.”
“Disney isn’t shit, and I do like that, but I like other stuff too. Superheroes or princesses, they’re all about good overcoming evil, and most end happily. That’s what I like. I’m a sucker for a happily ever after.”
He turns to me, and when our eyes meet, that same feeling goes through me. Like we’re on the same wavelength. Like we’re connected on an emotional level. He holds my gaze, and I’m moving closer on my own accord. He reaches out and pushes my hair back. I shiver.
“Cold?”
“A little,” I say, feeling breathless.
“Hang on,” he says and gets up, returning with a blanket. He pulls me into his lap, encircling in his arms. I rest my head against his firm chest and he kisses my forehead.
I let out a breath and close my eyes. Noah runs his fingers up and down my arm. My heart thumps in my chest yet at the same time I’m perfectly content.
“Are you tired?” Noah asks me.
“I’m okay. But if you keep doing that, I’ll fall asleep. It feels good.”
He tips his head down and nuzzles my neck. “I can do something that feels better.”
His lips meet my skin, sending a jolt through me. He kisses my neck and it’s everything a kiss should be. Gentle. Wet. Warm. I want his mouth all over me.
Now.
“Noah,” I groan. “We … we shouldn’t.” He doesn’t stop kissing my throat. “Plus I’ve been super constipated and bloated the last few days.”
He pulls away, raising an eyebrow. “I could have lived my whole life without knowing that.”
I smile and turn around to look at him. “It’s a symptom of carrying our baby. You get to know all the nitty-gritties I’m experiencing.”
“Our baby,” he says softly. “Sorry she’s making you feel like shit.”
“You don’t know it’s a girl. And it’s okay. I haven’t felt that bad, really.” I take a deep breath. “I kinda killed the mood, didn’t I?”
“Just a bit. But I’ll still have sex with you if you want.”
I shake my head, laughing. “Oh, thanks. I want to,” I add, afraid Noah is going to take my abstinence personally. “I just…”
“What are you afraid of?” he asks. “You’re obviously not a virgin.”
I bite the inside of my cheek. “I don’t really know. I’m so confused and emotional and … and scared. I’m really scared.”
He sits up and takes my hands in his, clear blue eyes locking with mine. “It scares me too, Lauren. But know I’m here for you—both of you.” He leans in and gives me a quick kiss. “And I’m not saying this to get in your pants, but how is not sleeping together going to make it any less scary?”
I shake my head. “Sex is complicated.”
Noah’s eyebrows go up. “Who have you been having sex with? It’s not that complicated.”
“You know what I mean. And…” I can’t say it, because saying it means I have to fully admit it to myself. As perfect as Noah has been over the last month, I’m terrified he’s going to revert back to old ways, decide this baby-daddy thing isn’t for him and leave me not just alone but broken hearted.
Because if he decided to walk away, it would break my heart. Hearts can only get broken when love is involved. I’m not in love with Noah, yet. But I’m starting to fall.
And that is terrifying.
“Hey,” he says gently. “No rush, okay? Obviously, I’m ready when you are, but we’ll take it slow.”
Hearing him say that makes me want to rip off my clothes and throw him on the ground.
“Thank you, Noah.”
“You don’t have to thank me,” he says softly. “I’m not doing this as a favor to you. I’m doing this because I want to, and making you happy makes me happy.”
Tears bite at the corners of my eyes and I’m teetering even closer to the edge of falling.
“Don’t look so surprised,” Noah says softly and moves his face closer to mine. He brings his tattooed arms around me. “You have no idea how much I care, Lauren. I have for a while, longer than you know.”
“Why?” I blurt.
He smiles. “You’ve been more to me than just my best friend’s sister. You’re different than anyone I know and I … I…” He looks away, unable to bring himself to say what he wants to say. Instead, he brings his face to mine and kisses me.
Time stops and I’m standing still as life swirls around us. Then Noah parts his lips and slips his tongue into my mouth. Suddenly I can’t get close enough. I twist, wrapping my arms around Noah and straddling his lap.
It’s crazy how one kiss can be the spark that ignites a fire of passion.
Noah pulls me to him with a desperation I didn’t know he had. He flips me over and pins me between his body and the couch, kissing me like his life depends on it. I widen my legs, welcoming him closer. We continue kissing, and I feel his cock harden against me. It turns me on to know he wants me.
He moves his lips down to my neck, sucking and biting at my skin. My want is growing for him, getting hotter and wetter as each second passes. He runs a hand up under my shirt, fingers sweeping across the curve of my side then onto my breast. I moan when he slips his hand under my bra, fingers gently circling my nipple.
I let out another moan as he caresses me, and moves his mouth back to mine. He knows exactly what he’s doing, and he’s doing it better than anyone has ever done to me before. And we only just got started.
Holy fuck, Noah Wilson is hot.
He gets a little rougher and I can hardly stand it. I need him now. I reach down and pull up his shirt, running my hands along his muscular torso. I bring them down, finding the clasp of his belt. I try to get it undone when he sits up and yanks my shirt over my head. For a few seconds, he doesn’t move. He just stares at me with hunger in his eyes.
“You are so fucking beautiful, Lauren,” he whispers, deep voice sending tremors through me. Then he dives back down, picking back up where we left off. His hands go around me and my bra is off in two seconds flat. And I’m still fumbling with belt. I haven’t even gotten to his pants yet, though his big cock is pushing so hard against the material it might rip it on its own and save me the work.
He takes both my hands in his and moves them above my head. Ye
s, I am so glad I insisted on shaving tonight. We’re kissing again and now I’m feeling that same desperation. I don’t just want Noah. I need him.
He pushes himself up just a bit and moves his bearded face down, taking one of my breasts in his mouth. He swirls his tongue around my nipple and I squirm underneath him.
Oh my god, that feels so good. My head falls to the side. His teeth gently bite down, then he lets up and works his tongue again. I rub myself against him, feeling close to coming already.
“Ohh,” I say out loud. “That feels so—ow!”
Noah jerks away. “I hurt you?”
I hunch my shoulders forward. “No, not really, but yeah.” I feel my cheeks flush from embarrassment and frustration. “Sensitive nipples. Ya know … another symptom.” It was one of my first symptoms really I wrote off as PMS.
“Oh, uh, sorry. Want me to not do that?”
“No, I like it. It’s just, um, super sensitive to any touch now.” I let out a breath, mad at myself for ruining the passion-fueled moment. Again. Things are different now. I’m sharing my body with a teeny-tiny person. “So keep doing it. I think. Ugh. I don’t know. I’m sorry, Noah.”
He grins. “Don’t be sorry. I’ve never fucked a pregnant chick before, so it’ll be an experience for us both.”
I put my hands on his waist and pull him back down to me. I put my lips close to his ear and whisper, “Who said I was going to let you fuck me?”
“I want you, Lauren,” he growls. “I’ve wanted you for so long.”
And I’m a goner. I put my lips to his and we are kissing again. I reach down and pop the button on his jeans—on my first try, I should add. I don’t hesitate. I don’t think things through. I push my hand inside his pants, feeling the full length and girth of his cock.
No wonder I was so sore the day after our one-night stand.
Noah lets out a groan, melting against my touch. I push his pants down, and they’re not even over his ass when Noah impatiently sits up and kicks them off. My pants come off next, and Noah takes another few seconds to admire me.
I’ve never had anyone look at me like that before. There is lust and desire in his eyes, but there is also something else. Something deeper, and he’s looking at me like he’s just been given the one thing he’s wanted but couldn’t have.
[2016] First Comes Love Page 10