by Miranda Lee
‘Everything was perfect, Mum,’ she said. ‘I’ll ring you later. Bye.’
Rising, Jess dashed for the bathroom, where the sight of her pink bridesmaid dress draped over the bath reminded her of the submissive scenario Ben had insisted upon in there. That was where her loss of will-power had all started, of course. In that shower. By the time he’d turned off the water, she’d been so excited that he could have done anything to her and she would not have objected.
The speed with which he’d turned her into a submissive sex slave was quite shocking. So why wasn’t she more shocked this morning? Maybe it was because underneath all that S&M role-playing Ben was a nice man. A decent man. She felt confident that he would never hurt her for real. Look at the way he’d made love to her later in the night, so gently and rather sweetly. She’d enjoyed that time even more than all the other times so far. And there’d been quite a few already, Jess thought ruefully. Ben couldn’t seem to keep his hands off her. In more ways than one!
After a rather quick shower, Jess rubbed some of the body lotion she found in the vanity into her buttocks. They were still a little on the tender side, but nothing major. Once her teeth were cleaned and her hair up in a ponytail, she hurried into the other bedroom where she took out some fresh clothes: a pair of three-quarter length white trousers and a navy-and-white striped top. Slipping white sandals onto her feet, she headed for the kitchen where Ben was thankfully now wearing the white bathrobe which had been on the bedroom floor earlier. He was sitting at the kitchen table with some toast and coffee in front of him.
‘I think your mother’s checking up on you,’ he said.
‘Possibly. It’s hard to put anything past my mum.’
‘Not for the want of your trying, though,’ he said, smiling at her.
Lord, but he was devilishly attractive when he smiled like that, even with slightly bleary eyes and a stubbly chin.
‘She wanted to know how the wedding went. And to invite you to our family barbecue tonight.’
His eyebrows lifted, then fell. ‘Do you want me to go, Jess?’
She shrugged. ‘I doubt you’ll enjoy it much. Mum will give you the once-over, then Dad’ll probably give you the third degree, if he thinks you’re interested in me.’
‘Which I am.’
It annoyed Jess, his saying that. Because he wasn’t really interested in her in that way. He just wanted to have more sex with her whilst he was here in Australia. Okay, so Ben was basically a good man, but he was also spoiled and selfish. It wasn’t all his fault, of course. He’d been born beautiful and into great wealth: both very corrupting factors. He’d probably developed his liking for kinky sex because he’d had so much sex in his life he’d got bored with straightforward love-making. Which was a pity. Because he did straightforward love-making very well indeed.
Jess sighed. ‘I honestly don’t think you should go.’
‘Why not?’
‘For the reasons I just told you.’
‘But I want to meet your parents.’
Jess rolled her eyes. ‘For pity’s sake, why?’
‘Because I want to ask them to give you this week off so we can go to Sydney and work together on Fab Fashions. I thought we might stay down there instead of driving up and down the motorway every day. Mum has a flat in Bondi we could use.’
Jess didn’t know what to say. She wanted to go, of course. Wanted the opportunity to do something about Fab Fashions. And, yes, she wanted to spend more time alone with Ben, especially some more of his very exciting brand of sex. She’d be lying if she didn’t admit that, especially to herself. But at the back of her mind, in that place reserved for difficult decisions, she knew if she did this, then she was sure to become even more emotionally involved with him.
‘I…I don’t know, Ben,’ she said hesitantly, turning away to make herself some coffee. ‘Like you said, there’s probably no fixing Fab Fashions. We’d just be wasting our time.’
‘I don’t agree. We’ll have that chat on the drive home and come up with a new name, one which will lend itself to a successful marketing strategy. Because you’re right, Jess. Companies like ours shouldn’t just bail out when things get tough. We can afford to ride some losses for a while, especially when the alternative means that people will lose their jobs.’
Jess wanted to believe he meant it. But she didn’t. Companies like De Silva & Associates were all about making profits. They didn’t give a damn about the little people. Which was what she was. One of the little people.
Jess finished making her coffee, then carried it over to the table. ‘I’m sorry, Ben,’ she said, pulling out a chair and sitting down, ‘but I’d rather not. I’m a mechanic, not some marketing expert.’
‘So you’re giving up on Fab Fashions?’
‘I’ve told you what’s wrong with the business. You’re an intelligent man. I’ll put my thinking cap on during the drive back and come up with a name which might suit. Then it’s up to you to do something with it.’
He looked at her long and hard, then shrugged. ‘Okay. If that’s the way you want it.’
What she wanted at that moment was never to have met Ben De Silva.
‘I still wouldn’t mind coming to that barbecue, Jess.’
‘No, Ben. I’d rather you didn’t.’
He frowned at her. ‘Why is that?’
‘I don’t want my parents knowing what we’ve been up to this weekend. And they will. Mum will take one look at us together and she’ll know.’
‘We’re consenting adults, Jess. Our having sex isn’t a crime.’
‘No, but it’s very unlike me, Ben, to hop into bed so quickly. Mum’s sure to jump to the wrong conclusion.’
‘Which is?
‘That I’ve fallen madly in love.’
Again, she was on the end of another long, thoughtful look.
‘I take it that hasn’t happened?’
‘You know it hasn’t. We’ve been having a dirty weekend, Ben. That’s all.’ It went against her grain to describe their weekend in such a crude fashion, but it was the truth after all.
‘I don’t see it that way, Jess. I like you. A lot. And I want to see more of you.’
‘You mean you want to have more kinky sex with me whilst you’re in Australia.’
He pursed his lips in obvious annoyance. ‘You make it all sound so tacky. Yes, of course I want to have more sex with you, but not just kinky sex. I enjoy making love to you in more traditional ways as well. I also want to spend time with you out of bed.’
Jess’s laugh was a little bitter. ‘Yes, I noticed you like having sex out of bed too.’
His blue eyes flashed with frustration. ‘Very funny. Just remember, you’re the one who knocked back my offer of our working together on Fab Fashions.’
‘I can live with that. I can’t live with you taking me for a fool.’
He sat bolt upright in his chair, his face furious. ‘I would never do that. I think you’re one of the smartest girls I’ve ever met. And the most stubborn. I suppose if I asked you to go back to New York with me, you’d say no to that as well!’
Jess could not have been more taken aback. Or more speechless.
‘Well?’ he snapped when she said nothing. ‘What would you say to such an offer?’
Jess gathered in a deep breath, then let it out slowly. ‘I would say thank you very much, Ben, but no thank you. My life is here, in Australia. I wouldn’t be happy in New York.’
‘How do you know?’
‘I just know.’
His eyes carried exasperation. ‘Most girls would jump at the chance. For Pete’s sake, Jess, you wouldn’t have to pay for a thing. You could stay in my apartment and have the holiday of a lifetime.’
The word ‘holiday’ reaffirmed what Jess already knew. He wasn’t seriously interested in her. Not the way she would have liked. But then, that was never going to happen. He’d already said he didn’t want to get married. She was just a passing amusement, one which he hadn’t grown bored
with yet.
‘Couldn’t we just leave things the way they are, Ben? I’m happy to go out with you whilst you’re staying up on the coast. I like you a lot, but I don’t want to go to America with you.’
Ben should have been relieved, he supposed, that she hadn’t jumped at his somewhat impulsive offer. But he wasn’t. He was bitterly disappointed. He’d wanted to show her New York, wanted to give her the time of her life.
‘Fine,’ he bit out.
‘Please don’t think me ungrateful, Ben,’ she went on, her eyes softening on him. ‘It was a very generous offer. But it’s best I stay here in Australia.’
He sighed, then smiled at her. ‘So we’re still on for dinner tomorrow night?’
Jess smiled back at him. ‘Of course. Where are you going to take me?’
‘I have no idea. I’ll ask Mum when she gets back tomorrow. She knows all the best local restaurants. But you’ll have to pick me up. I’m not allowed to drive till I get that stupid medical clearance. Hopefully by Tuesday that’ll be done and I can drive Mum’s car.’
‘So your mother will be there when I pick you up?’ she said, sounding a bit panicky.
‘Yes, but you don’t have to worry. Mum’s really quite nice, despite everything.’
‘What do you mean by that?’
‘I’ll explain on the drive back,’ he said, thinking he shouldn’t have made such a leading comment. But it was too late now. Besides, it would give them something to talk about. Telling Jess all about his mother’s exploits over the years would take some time. ‘I’ll go shower and shave whilst you have breakfast. Then we should get going.’
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
BY THE TIME they stopped at Sandy Hollow for lunch, Jess had a much better understanding of why Ben wasn’t interested in marriage. To find out that your mother had married your father for his money must have come as a bitter blow. Still, it had been good of his father not to say anything till Ben had turned twenty-one. That way, Ben had been able to grow up loving his mother who, though materialistic, had obviously been a good mother to him.
Despite that, Jess could just imagine how Ben had felt when his mother had admitted she’d trapped his father into marriage with a pregnancy and had never loved him. His money was what she’d loved. Yes, there were reasons for her materialism, but the bottom line was still not very nice. Her actions certainly wouldn’t have engendered faith in her son’s own relationships with the opposite sex. Given he would one day be as rich as his father, Ben would always be on the lookout for signs that his girlfriends were gold-diggers. Which was an awful way to have to live.
But it did also explain why Ben concentrated on sex when he was with a girl he liked. Sex was safe, especially the kind of sex he indulged in. Such goings-on kept his girlfriends at a distance, both physically and emotionally. Jess realised that the only time he’d had sex face to face with her had been when she’d been on top. But even then he’d adopted the role of voyeur rather than that of a loving partner.
‘Neither of your parents have married again,’ she remarked once they sat down to another pub lunch. Different pub but similar food. A steak sandwich and salad. ‘Why is that, do you think?’
Ben shrugged. ‘Mum always said she would marry again if she ever fell in love. But that’s unlikely to happen, given the type of man she usually dates—all young, handsome studs without much between their ears. Mum does like intelligence when she’s out of bed.’
Jess tried not to look shocked at his talking about his mother’s sex life in that fashion.
‘But who knows? This fellow she’s gone on the cruise with seems a different kettle of fish. Not so young and he actually works. I’ll find out more when she gets home tomorrow. As far as Dad is concerned… This might sound silly but I think Mum was the only woman Dad ever truly loved. Though don’t get me wrong. He was unfaithful to her during their marriage. Had several mistresses going at once, apparently. He still has women running after him, despite being sixty-five and not the best-looking man in the world. Money is a powerful aphrodisiac,’ he added drily.
Jess sighed. ‘I can understand now why you don’t want to get married.’
‘What?’ Ben said, almost knocking his drink over. ‘I never said I didn’t want to get married.’
Jess frowned. ‘But you did. When I asked you why you broke up with Amber you said she wanted marriage and you didn’t.’
‘Not with her I don’t. I don’t love her. That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t consider it with anyone else at some stage.’
‘Oh,’ Jess said, startled by this turn of events. Not that it changed anything. Ben might want marriage at some stage, but it wouldn’t be to an ordinary girl like her.
Ben stared across the table at Jess and wondered if that was why she’d refused to come to New York with him. Because she wanted marriage and she thought he didn’t. Not that he was about to propose. He did, however, feel more strongly about Jess than any girl he’d ever met.
He decided then and there that he would ask her to come to New York with him again later in the week. Meanwhile, he’d show her the time of her life every night. And, yes, behind the scenes he’d even do something about that damned Fab Fashions.
‘Are you absolutely sure you don’t want me to come to your family barbecue?’ he asked coolly before picking up his steak sandwich and taking a big bite.
She was tempted. He could see she was tempted.
‘I promise to be on my best behaviour,’ he added once his mouth was temporarily empty.
She laughed. ‘It’s not you I’m worried about. It’s my mother.’
Ben didn’t give a damn if her mother realised they were sleeping together. Mothers had never been a problem to him. They usually liked him a lot. ‘I can handle your mother,’ he said.
Lord, but he was an arrogant devil. But she did so like him. And she wanted him like mad. Already she was regretting not going to New York with him, even if it was only for a holiday. Still, she suspected Ben hadn’t totally given up on that idea. Jess wondered what she would say if he asked her again.
Hopefully, she would have the courage—and the common sense—still to say no. But, dear Lord, she did have a lot of trouble saying no to him.
‘I’m coming to that barbecue,’ he announced firmly, ‘And that’s final. Now, about that new name for Fab Fashions; I’ve given it some thought. What do you think of Real Women? It would lend itself to a good advertising campaign. Clothes for real women, et cetera, et cetera.’
The take-over man in action again, Jess thought. Telling her he was coming, then changing the subject.
She had to smile. He was clever all right.
‘I think it’s a great name,’ she said. ‘I love it.’
He beamed across the table at her. ‘Finally she agrees with something I’ve suggested!’
‘I can be agreeable,’ she said. ‘When it’s a sensible suggestion.’
‘Coming to New York with me is just as sensible.’
‘Ben,’ she said with a warning look. ‘Just leave it, will you?’
‘Okay. I will. For now. But I make no promise to do so indefinitely.’
They both fell to eating their meals, Jess doing her best to stop thinking about her potentially dangerous feelings for Ben. Once again she wished she could be like other girls. Most would jump at the chance of going to New York with him, even if it didn’t lead to anything permanent.
But maybe it would; she started hoping as she ate. How would she know unless she agreed? She’d gone to bed with Ben initially because she knew she’d regret it if she didn’t. Maybe she’d regret not going to New York with him and not giving their relationship a chance.
But it wasn’t a relationship, her more pragmatic side argued. It was just a fling, or an affair, for want of a better word. Ben had never said he loved her. Not that he would. It was way too early for a man of his natural wariness to make such a declaration. She certainly wasn’t about to tell him she was close to falling for him either. That wou
ld only give him power over her. He had enough of that already.
No, she wouldn’t be foolish enough to admit that. But she would think about going to New York with him and, when he asked her again, she probably would say yes.
‘That steak was quite good,’ Ben said, wiping his mouth with a paper serviette.
‘My dad cooks much better steak on the barbecue,’ Jess told him. ‘And Mum’s salads are way better.’
‘In that case, I’m in for a treat later today.’
‘Just don’t let my brothers give you too much beer.’
‘Why? You’re worried I might not be able to perform when you take me home?’
‘What? No, of course not! Ben De Silva, haven’t you had enough sex for one weekend?’
‘There’s no such thing as too much sex.’
‘There is if it involves getting your bottom spanked,’ she whispered so that the people at the next table couldn’t hear.
He frowned. ‘Sorry. I did get a little carried away last night. In that case, you can have today off.’
She tried to be annoyed with him but she simply couldn’t. Instead, she smiled. A slightly wry smile, but still a smile. ‘One day, some woman is going to tell you where to go, Ben De Silva.’
He nodded. ‘You could be right there. And I have a feeling she’s sitting across the table from me.’
I wish, Jess thought. But she just laughed, then finished off her coffee. Ten minutes later, they were back on the road and heading for home, turning off the motorway just after three-thirty.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
JESS’S HOME WAS bigger than Ben had expected, a two-storeyed, family-sized house in blond brick, with the biggest shed that Ben had ever seen sitting in a nearby paddock. A workshop, obviously, plus garaging for the hire cars. Two of the three massive roller doors were open and Ben could glimpse several cars within. The land around the house was bigger than he’d expected too, at least five acres. It was a lovely looking property with well-tended gardens, rolling lawns and enough trees to give privacy and shade.
Jess drove her SUV off the driveway onto a large square of gravel by the side of the house, the clock on her dash showing five to four as Ben climbed out. Jess had explained on the way that the barbecue wouldn’t start till five-ish, so they had some time before her brothers and their families descended upon them.