by Me, Tara Sue
He seemed to think about that. “I know nothing about the clothing market for children. Maybe if I didn’t have this move to the US hanging over my head, I could look into it more.”
His words shocked me. I’d been assuming he was the one who wanted to move to the States. But to hear what he’d just said, I wasn’t sure. “Move to the US hanging over his head,” didn’t sound like someone who was looking forward to the change.
“Why are you moving?” I asked. Why hadn’t I asked him before?
“I want to show you something. Walk with me,” he said, and nodded toward the path leading to Lake Como. I stood, and we started walking.
He continued talking, “My advisors encouraged me to make the move. They thought overall it would be better off for the company.”
“The company meaning you and your designs?”
“Yes. I also thought it might be more advantageous for Gemma to grow up in the US. So the decision really made itself.”
We walked along the edge of the lake, a gentle breeze rustled our hair.
I tucked a wayward strand behind my ear. “If you could do anything you wanted, would you move to the States?”
He took a long moment, pondering, or maybe searching for the right words. “It’s not that I don’t want to move. It’s that we’re going to be leaving so much behind. This estate is Gemma’s, and you heard her on your first day here. She doesn’t want to move.”
“I can’t say that I blame her,” I said. “It’d take a lot for me to leave this place.”
“Maria will be heartbroken as well,” he added.
“She isn’t going with you?” I was surprised. My assumption had been that she’d be moving along with them. Though I wasn’t sure why I thought that.
“I asked her to move with us,” he said. “But she said the only reason she’d go would be for Gemma, and I can’t ask her give up her life for her niece.” He shot me a knowing grin. “Plus, there’s a guy who lives in Como that wants to marry her, and I think she’d say yes if she wasn’t afraid she’d be leaving me in a mess. She won’t listen to me when I tell her Gemma and I would be fine. If we stay, I’m afraid she’d still be giving up her life.”
He was silent for a few moments before turning, and I realized we weren’t walking toward the lake like I thought we were but heading toward the business wing of the estate.
“Looked like a pretty intense phone call you were on earlier,” I said.
He nodded. “Yes. In fact, the entire move might be in jeopardy.”
It shocked me he looked as calm as he did. “Why?”
“Cost.” He snorted. “Isn’t that what it always is? I knew it would be ridiculously expensive, but I hadn’t anticipated just how much ridiculousness was possible.”
“You don’t look overly concerned,” I said.
“And I should be, right?” he asked. “That’s what one would normally do if something one had been working on for over a year appeared to be on the verge of falling apart.”
Duh, I wanted to say, but kept silent.
“I told the head of the board that I’d think over my options and have an answer for him in twenty-four hours.”
“That fast?” I asked.
“It’s the only way to plug the hole the money keeps flowing out of.”
“You might not be moving after all.”
He stopped in front of the porch he’d been pacing on, only an hour ago.. “Would you be sad if I didn’t move to Boston?”
I wanted to tell him that what he did or didn’t do had no impact on my life. But after the last few days, I’d be lying. Instead, I played it safe by saying, “I’d be sad if you gave up what you wanted for something someone else thought you needed.”
He looked thoughtful, but said nothing, and for a few minutes we simply stood in the silence. His gaze was focused somewhere out over the lake when I asked him, “You said you wanted to show me something?”
Snapping out of whatever trance he’d been in, he turned toward me and held out his hand. “Yes, I wanted you to see this.”
I wasn’t sure what this he could want to show me in the business wing, but I was curious, so I let him lead me into his mega-sized office. From there, we moved farther inside and down a hallway Maria had told me on my first day held his workrooms.
The first workroom we passed was also the largest. It was my understanding that Luca would often display some of his designs in that room for buyers to come and see. In my mind that sounded more like a showroom, but I wasn’t going to argue those tiny details.
Luca came to a stop at the end of the hall at the last door on the left. Once unlocked, he opened the door and pushed it wide open, motioning for me to enter first. The room was small. That was the first thing I noticed, probably because every other room was so large and over the top.
What caught my eye and held my attention was the dress stand in one of the corners. From what I could see, Luca was halfway through another dress for Gemma. My feet moved of their own accord across the floor to the stand.
“When I get stressed out, or just need to clear my head,” Luca said from behind me. “I come here and work on these for Gemma.”
“Does it not work the same when you design clothes for women?”
He shook his head. “The last line I designed was inspired by you.”
I sucked in a breath. “I didn’t know.”
“I didn’t announce it to the public,” he said. “And so many people loved it and praised it and wanted more. But there’s not anything left. I used up all my creativity on your line.”
“I don’t believe that for a second,” I said. “I’ve seen your prior work, and it’s gorgeous. You’re probably stressed out about the move is all. I’m sure when you get settled, you’ll start to design again.”
“I don’t think so,” he said. “My heart isn’t in it anymore, and without that, my designs are nothing but dresses and fabric.”
“Where is your heart at?” I asked, not sure I was ready for his answer.
“You and Gemma,” he said, and my own heart splintered. “The two of you hold it.”
Chapter 22
Wren
For the next twenty-four hours, Luca stayed holed up in the office wing. The housekeeper took his meals to him, but she was the only one who even attempted to cross the threshold into that domain. Maria shook her head and said something in Italian that I couldn’t make out.
When I asked her if he’d ever done anything similar before, she said only once before with the last women’s line he designed. I let the discussion die after that because I was still uncertain how much she knew of my past with Luca.
Twenty-four hours after he entered his office/workshop area, he found me sitting outside on the porch with a view of the lake. He looked exhausted, but was smiling as if he were in on the world’s biggest secret.
I stood up and put my arms around him. “Poor thing,” I said. “You look as if you haven’t slept in a week.”
“That’s funny,” he added and then yawned. “I feel as if I haven’t slept in two weeks.”
“You should go to bed before you attempt to anything else.” I’d heard people use the phrase, fall asleep standing up before, but until today I’d seen no one I thought it applied to.
He yawned again. “You’re right. I want to talk with you, but it’d probably be better to do it when there’s less of a chance for me to fall asleep while doing so.” He lifted an arm and sniffed. “I should take a shower before I nap.”
I assured him I wasn't going anywhere and watched as he walked toward the house.
Because I’d expected him to sleep for at least eight hours, it surprised me when he appeared in my room about four hours later. I raised an eyebrow as he walked in. But damn, if he didn’t look completely refreshed and rejuvenated.
“It’s unfair for you to look that good after only four hours of sleep,” I said, but he just chuckled and sat down in one of the chairs in the small sitting area of the guest bedroom.
“I need to let you know what I’ve decided and done over the last day because it affects you, and if there will be any fallout from my actions, I want to proactively address them.”
I closed the book I’d been reading, suddenly somber. “What are you talking about?”
“I discussed the company’s financials with my advisors, and we have cancelled the move. At least in its current state.” He paused and placed a hand on my knee. “Which means there won’t be a need for an article on the Italian designer moving his company to America.”
“That’s okay,” I said. “I can write it about why you changed your mind, or what you plan to do now that you aren’t moving to Boston. Or not. It really doesn’t matter.”
“Why doesn’t it matter?” he asked.
“Because no matter what, I’ve decided whatever I write will be my last piece. I never wanted to be a journalist and I’ve decided that if I’m not passionate about it, it has no place in my life.”
“You’re quitting your job?”
“Yes,” I answered. It was the first time I’d ever mentioned it out loud, and it amazed me at the freedom and relief I found in doing so. “So tell me what you’ve decided to do.”
“I’m still going to go to Boston for the launch of my new line. It’s important to me. You inspired it, after all. I’m taking Gemma with me when I go because she’s old enough to travel and see the world, and I want her to learn and experience that there’s more to life than this estate. But after the launch, I’m coming back here, though I’ll probably buy a small place in Boston. To give some stability while we’re there.”
“And what will you be doing that will have you and Gemma traveling between here and Boston?” I asked.
“I’m going to focus on the children’s designs the way you suggested,” he said.
He could have said little else that would have surprised me more. “Really?”
“Yes.” His eyes sparkled with an excitement I hadn’t seen whenever he’d talked about work before. “All the advisors and investors were onboard. Hearing my ideas and plans for this new line did away with any doubt they might have had regarding canceling the move.”
“That’s wonderful news, Luca,” I said. “I’m so happy you get to do what you want and that everyone is behind you. And now Gemma won’t have to move. She’ll be beside herself.”
“As long as she doesn’t mind visiting.”
“I’m sure she’ll be fine going wherever with you, as long as she knows that at the end of the day this is her home.” I knew he was well aware of that fact. She was his daughter, and he knew her much better than I did.
“Yes,” Luca said, catching my gaze and holding it. “It all sounds like a perfect plan. And it is, except for one thing.”
I frowned. “What’s missing?”
“You,” he said softly.
“Me?”
“You’re so full of questions, vita mia,” he said with a smile. “But none of this would be happening if it wasn’t for you. And I’ve realized that it won’t be complete if you’re not part of it.”
He couldn’t be serious. “But Luca,” I said, utterly shocked and confused. “I know nothing about fashion. How could I possibly help you?”
“Look at me,” he said, taking my hands in his and facing me. “You may not know fashion, but you know people. You could help with PR and marketing. You’re an awesome writer and I could use your talent with words. Say you’ll at least think about it, Wren. Please, at least think about it before deciding.”
It was such a crazy idea, I almost told him no based on that alone. But one look in his eyes stopped me. He was serious. Sure, it was a crazy idea, but wasn’t it time for me to be a little crazy?
“Let me think about it,” I said.
“Thank you. That’s all I ask.” He leaned over and gave me a quick kiss. “I’m going to give Gemma the news about the move.”
As promised, I thought about it. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that there was one item to discuss before I could make any decision.
After dinner, and after Gemma had been tucked into bed, I walked outside and found him sitting on the dock by the lake. He looked up at me expectantly when I sat down beside him.
“I need to tell you about five years ago,” I said. “How prior to spending the last few days here, I thought our time in Italy before meant nothing to you.”
Chapter 23
Wren
Five Years Ago
The past ten days had been one long hedonistic adventure. Luca was unlike anyone I’d ever known. And truth be told, I’d wondered in the back of my head if he wasn’t just a little bit too good to be true. Yet, when I looked in his eyes as he was holding me, or if our eyes caught in public as he held my hand, I’d feel foolish for ever thinking he could be less than what he appeared to be. In those moments, I’d have bet anything he was and would somehow be mine.
Before experiencing it myself, I’d have rolled my eyes if anyone had told me they believed in love at first sight. Yet from our first genuine conversation when I met him for drinks the day of my arrival, I’d been slowly, but surely been changed into a believer.
I was flying hard and fast, and Luca was right there by my side. With him, everything seemed to be more. Comedy was funnier. Food tasted better. And sex? Well, sex was out of this world.
When it became that point in the night that we were exhausted, but still refused to succumb to sleep, we’d talk in whispers. What was it, I pondered, that was so different with us? Why did sex seem sexier? Why did his touch turn me to goo like no one else’s ever had?
Luca would laugh and tell me to stop analyzing, that we shouldn’t question why, but be happy that we’d found each other.
“So many people never find this,” he’d whispered in those still sacred moments. Then he’d turn to pull me close for a kiss and we’d realize we weren’t quite as exhausted as we thought.
Though we certainly tried, there times we weren’t together. Usually it was because Luca had a business call to make. He’d always apologize, which I thought was sweet, but totally unnecessary. He was an up-and-coming fashion designer, I’d tell him. Of course, I didn’t expect him to be off the grid and completely unreachable. Then I’d push up on my toes to kiss him and tell him that I’d see him soon, and he’d swat my butt as he turned to leave.
We’d just repeated that routine, late in the morning on my sixth day in Italy. I felt a bit of trepidation because the time was quickly approaching for my return to the US and to say I was dreading it would be the understatement of the year.
So far, Luca and I had addressed nothing past my time here, and I hadn’t brought it up. It was almost as if by mutual consent, we’d agreed that if we didn’t talk about it, it wouldn’t happen.
I stepped out of the elevator onto my floor. We spent most of our time in his room for several reasons. For one, his room was much nicer, being a suite and all. The second reason was everyone from my group had a room on this floor. Not that it mattered a bit what anyone thought, I just didn’t want to deal with the side-eyed speculation and the not-so-whispered whispers.
Halfway to my room, a door just ahead of me opened, and Laura stepped out. Her eyes widened in surprise, and she glanced around the hall, looking for someone. Luca, I decided.
“Oh my, God, Wren,” she said, still looking around as if expecting Luca to jump out from behind a doorway and shout “Boo!”
“What?” I asked.
“I’ve been looking for you and hoping to find you when he wasn’t around.”
“Luca? Why?”
“Two days ago, a group of us were in the cafe downstairs, just drinking coffee and hanging out. Trying to decide what we wanted to do for the day. Betsy and I had struck up a conversation with a group of local guys who were sitting near us.”
I nodded, trying to hurry the story up or at least figure out why she felt the need to tell me about having coffee with the locals.
“You and L
uca walk by,” Laura continued. “Neither one of you saw us, but the local guys most certainly saw you.”
She pressed her lips together.
“And?” I asked.
“They started talking about Luca being a big time player, and how from the looks of it, he’d found himself a toy.” She was clearly upset as she continued talking. “I asked them what they meant, and they said he liked naïve American girls and was looking for one to pave his way to America.”
I didn’t know how to respond. That didn’t sound like the Luca I knew at all. But Laura wasn’t finished.
“Then they said that he’s practically engaged to a childhood friend and everyone thinks he’s using you as a last fling before settling down.”
I wrinkled my forehead. “That doesn’t make sense. Either he’s looking for an easy way to get into America or one last fling. It can’t be both.”
“But don’t you get it? It’s probably one of them, and neither of the two are good.”
She truly looked worried, and I can’t lie, it shocked me. I wouldn’t have thought she’d care one way or the other what happened to me.
I also didn’t know how to respond. If I told her the truth, that Luca wasn’t using me to get into the States or as a last fling, she wouldn’t believe me, and she’d probably think I wasn’t taking her seriously. But I didn’t want to say anything implying he was guilty, either.
“Thank you for telling me what you heard,” I said, choosing my words carefully. “I truly appreciate that you’re looking out for me. I promise to look into both claims and speak to Luca if necessary.”
Laura nodded. “I hope it’s neither one, and Luca turns out to be the great guy you think he is. The two of you looked like you were happy together.”
“Thank you,” I said, smiling. “We have been.”
“You’re welcome.” She gave me a quick hug. “Sorry I have to scurry off, but I’m already late for brunch.”