by Rene Penn
Dave raised his brow at his wife. “I think she wants some.” Then he said to Jules, “There’s more in the house. I can go get it.”
"I don't want any," Jules replied. "Kathy smelled marijuana yesterday, and she thought it was me. Bryan told her it wasn't, but I don't think she believes him. My name should be cleared from this."
“All right, all right. We’ll talk to her,” Helena said.
“They’ll think we’re going through a late mid-life crisis,” Dave said. “Truth is, Helena’s had some medical issues, and this is the best way to deal with the pain. Healthier than lots of meds.”
That only explains her, Jules thought.
Dave added, "I smoke it because I like it." And he dissolved into giggles. His wife snickered along with him. They acted like a couple of teenagers.
Jules shook her head. “You two are so high right now.” And that made them laugh even more.
With the mystery solved, Jules turned to leave when Helena said, “Jules, please don’t tell them. Let us break the news.”
Should Jules keep the secret and trust that they would ‘fess up?
She exhaled, and a pillow of white floated from her mouth into the cold air. Tomorrow, she'd be on a flight back to DC. The Blakelys would never see her again. Same for Bryan, probably. Helena and Dave, on the other hand, were regulars to the cabin. Family. What Kathy and Paul thought of them mattered more than what they thought of Jules. It wouldn't hurt if Jules kept their secret.
“Fine,” she said. “But smoke somewhere that doesn’t lead to the vents inside the house.”
Helena gave her a thumbs-up, and Jules trekked back through the morning snow.
◆◆◆
When Bryan woke up, a light somberness lay over him. That always happened on the last full day of a trip home. He loved being back, hanging out with his family, seeing the snow, and enjoying a white Christmas. But he'd made a choice several years ago, to try something different, a life on the East Coast, a brand new life compared to his upbringing in Missoula. Even though things panned out differently than he imagined, with Kaitlyn staying behind, he didn't regret his decision. He liked his life, his career, and his job at JSA.
And then there was Jules.
He’d seen potential between them during their visit, more potential than with any woman in a long time. But it had waned. Considering himself to be action- and results-oriented with life, as well as work, he could only come to one conclusion.
Perhaps Jules’ visit wasn’t about the two of them getting together after all. Her presence helped him bury the pain he carried from his relationship with Kaitlyn. Jules distracted him from thinking about his ex, from giving his past relationship absolute power over future relationships. And despite seeing Kaitlyn twice, he’d felt nothing toward her. Yes, he probably had Jules to thank for all of it.
Bryan sat up in bed and grinned. Sure, Kaitlyn looked nice yesterday. But nothing had sizzled for him—even when her body lingered against his during their hug. If it had been a previous visit, would it have awakened something inside him?
But if Jules had done the same thing—pressed her frame to his—now, that may have awakened something. Funny how seeing her bra on the floor days ago had more of an impact on him than feeling Kaitlyn’s body against his.
Okay, maybe the attraction he felt for Jules hadn't waned completely. He couldn't act on it, though. His mother had revoked her status as Jules' number one cheerleader. Kathy had started the bus to leave the stadium, so to speak. But it didn't mean Bryan couldn't be grateful for Jules' visit. Oddly, she'd given him hope.
“Are you awake?” Kathy asked through his closed bedroom door.
Bryan opened the door for her. “Yeah. What’s up?”
"We're thinking about skiing later today when things warm up a little more." The temperature was predicted to reach a balmy twenty-five degrees that day.
“Cool. Sounds good. Did you ask Jules yet?”
"No." She touched her cheek. Even hearing Jules' name made his mother flush with annoyance. She'd never say it. His mother was too nice for that. But he knew.
"Don't worry about it. I'll see if Jules is interested."
“She was at it again, by the way.”
He grumbled. “What now?”
“Smoking.”
“But she said it wasn’t her.”
“Who knows what to believe?” Kathy frowned and closed the door behind her.
He’d believed Jules, but now he wasn’t sure. Why had she lied to him? Was it to keep him from getting angry? Well, guess what? It didn’t work. He saw a shade of red that didn’t have anything to do with roses and hearts. Disappointment colored his view, too. In a way, the latter seemed worse.
After breakfast, Bryan decided to speak with Jules about it. His parents had left to take Tigger for a walk. In the kitchen, Clara and Helena chatted and warmed up their coffee cups. Everyone else hung out downstairs in the basement. Bryan and Jules sat alone in the living room.
He said, “Everyone’s going skiing later. Do you want to go?”
“Oh. What about going around town with Ryan?”
Jealousy reared its head again, striking Bryan like a match. “What do you mean?”
“He suggested we go sightseeing. The three of us.”
“Did he?” The match burned brighter. “Funny, he never mentioned it.” His tone curled with sarcasm.
“You were busy at the time it came up.” She turned away. “With Kaitlyn.”
Bryan’s jaw tightened. “She’s an old—”
“Friend?” She finished for him. “I heard.”
Heard? What did she know? “We were catching up.”
She glanced back at him. “I noticed.”
“And during my conversation with Kaitlyn, I noticed that my brother kept the chair warm next to you, too.”
“Excuse me?” Her voice pitched at the end.
“Were you two plotting ways to go around Missoula and hijack more cooked turkeys?”
A pained expression crossed her face. And then it morphed into something else. She let out a low chuckle. "I can't believe it. You're jealous."
“No, I’m not.”
“You sure sound like it, even though you shouldn’t be.”
Their gazes locked like two rams’ heads. He wanted to say, “Why shouldn’t I be jealous?” But pride wouldn’t let him ask.
He said, “Maybe he forgot to mention his plan with me, so he could hang out with you alone.”
She broke his gaze. “Whatever.”
Whatever? Not the response he expected. Something like, “I only want to be alone with you, Bryan. Let’s pick up where we left off in the basement.” Kissing, touching. Her chest pressed against his…
“Did you smoke weed again?” he blurted.
“What?”
“This morning. My mom smelled it again. Tell the truth.”
“Bryan!” Her voice made him flinch.
“Where did you and Ryan get the turkey?”
He was spewing nonsense, his brain misfiring.
Her hands went into fists on the couch. “What the hell is your deal?” When he couldn’t answer, she said, “You know what? I think we need space or something.”
Of course.
Women. They wanted space to get out of an inconvenient moment. That’s what Kaitlyn did. Now Jules seemed no different.
She added, “Maybe I shouldn’t go skiing.”
Bryan bared his teeth. “Fine.”
“Fine.” She stood up from the couch.
“Maybe I shouldn’t go sightseeing. I know what Missoula looks like anyway.”
“Fine.”
“Good.”
She glared at him, her blue eyes fiery. “Are you going to tell me what’s going on?”
He couldn’t. He hardly understood himself. He just knew that she didn’t want to go with him. And it triggered part of his brain like Pavlov’s dog.
“Have fun sightseeing,” he said and turned back to the TV.
Jules went upstairs, her cheeks puffed, her face flushed. She closed the door behind her and paced around the small room.
“Boys,” she murmured.
She liked this particular boy, though, and felt that he liked her, too. But that didn’t mean they were supposed to be together.
Feelings burst inside her. Too many to count. Too convoluted to decipher.
She stopped in front of the window and looked at the evergreens off in the distance. A mixture of confusion, anger, and frustration overwhelmed her, making tears inevitable. She flicked them away with a swipe of the hand, pulled out her phone, and fired off text messages to Kerri:
Had a fight with Bryan. Feels like a turning point. :(
I was dumb to think things would change after we kissed.
Kerri wrote back:
Its Christmas time!
You SHOULD hope and dream and think BIG! If he doesn’t know a good thing when he has it, SCREW him!
Jules replied:
Boys!
Kerri:
STUPID boys!
Jules:
Makes me a stupid girl if I like a stupid boy.
Kerri:
No one is perfect.
Don’t beat yourself up. And NO crying!
Jules:
Only a few tears, but I slapped them off my face.
Kerri sent a mixture of emojis: High-fives, hugs, a bomb. Jules didn’t quite understand the last one. Maybe it was for Bryan.
Jules:
Going sightseeing with his brother, and he’s not going.
Kerri:
The hot mountain man brother?
Jules:
Yes.
Kerri:
Your Christmas Ryan!
Jules shook her head and typed back:
NO! Christmas is over. Too late.
Santa brought me Bryan and took him away from me. Stupid Santa. Mean, terrible Santa.
Kerri:
Is Ryan your stocking stuffer…?
Another slew of emojis came through—smiles, puckering lips, heart eyes, an alligator. Again, Jules didn’t quite understand the last one. Maybe it was part of the mountain-man thing? Like Ryan could wrestle an alligator with his bare hands?
Kerri:
Go out with him and have fun.
Get your STOCKING STUFFED!
Jules burst out a chuckle. Where would she be without this woman?
Kerri added:
Wear your holiday bra! Maybe it’s meant for HOT mountain man after all!
Jules glanced down at her clingy, red-and-white-striped top and wrote:
Wearing a cute sweater but unsexy thermal shirt underneath to keep warm. Cami under that. Unsexy bra under that. He'd have too many layers to get through.
Kerri:
Bring scissors!
Thirteen
Bryan and Jules hadn’t spoken much since their tiff after breakfast. Ryan should show up around 3:30 p.m. to take Jules around town. But the others planned to leave around 2:30 to go skiing. With the daylight hours cut short this time of year, they wanted to get out and ski while they could still see the oncoming path of a tree.
Bryan found Jules in the living room watching HGTV. The show’s host pointed at a plank of wood, peeled it back, and revealed a crawling nest of termites. The camera panned back to a horrified couple, the potential homeowners, Bryan presumed. Jules brushed her hands over her arms. The sight of the critters must’ve made her skin crawl.
He stood at the other side of the sectional couch. “Change your mind about skiing?”
“I’d like to go skiing. But I may see the town, instead, since I doubt I’ll ever be here again.”
Ouch.
Her statement closed the proverbial coffin door with a clank.
“Am I wrong?” she asked.
He shrugged. “If your mind’s made up…”
He’d learned with Kaitlyn that there was no point in trying to change a woman’s decision about these kinds of things.
Jules crossed her arms. “Besides, I don’t think I’m on your mom’s favorite list.”
He couldn’t argue that claim.
“Change your mind about sightseeing?” she asked.
“I already agreed to go skiing. I have bets with Tarron and Tyler on who can ski faster. And I promised to hold Bonnie’s hand on the bunny slope.”
A faint smile crossed her lips. “Well, have fun.”
“You, too.”
His smile barely hung on as he walked away.
◆◆◆
Until Ryan arrived, Jules parked herself in front of the television like a couch potato. Marathons of Property Brothers ran on the screen, but it didn't occupy her full attention. She thought about Bryan, her time there at the cabin, and the mess she'd made of both.
When Ryan came to the front door, he peeked around the corner in the living room. The house was quiet. Empty. "Just you and me, huh?" He smiled.
“Yep.”
“You ready?”
She picked up her coat. The camel pea coat she brought from home, not the one Bryan got her for Christmas. Wearing his gift while hanging out with Ryan didn’t seem right.
She said, "I deliberately haven't made any sudden movements all day. I've stayed away from the oven, front door, and all the electrical outlets, so your parents know everything will be safe." Ryan chuckled as he opened the front door for her. "I'm surprised they left me here alone. If the tables were turned, I might not have."
They walked along the wooden front porch and onto the walkway to Ryan’s truck. “I doubt it’s as bad as you think.”
Ryan’s voice drizzled the air as he spoke, like delicious, hot caramel. The kind of voice that could melt away worries, a bad day, and all doubt.
He held out his hand so that she could hoist herself into the tall truck. His muscles rippled through his shearling coat, and she glanced away to secure her seatbelt. He hopped in next to her, started the engine, turned on some alternative rock, and pulled out of the driveway.
“What makes you think you’re in the doghouse? We took care of Christmas dinner, didn’t we?”
Ah, he must not have known about everything else. At least the others hadn’t been talking about her. She filled him on the other stuff that had happened.
“I’ll be steering you clear of my house then,” he joked.
“I don’t blame you.”
He glanced at her when he came to a stoplight. “You don’t seem like the stoner type.”
“I’m not.”
“Huh,” he grunted. “I wonder who’s doing it then.”
She locked her gaze on the window.
“Jules.”
When she turned back, Ryan stared at her. “I hardly know you, and I can tell you know something. Spill it, Short Circuit.”
She fought hard not to grin. “I’m sworn to secrecy.” Even if she were waterboarded with a hydrant of icy water, she wouldn’t rat on Dave and Helena.
"You've got a bad poker face. You know that?"
She shrugged a shoulder at him, and a deep chuckle rumbled in his chest.
Along the main road, a ranch stretched for acres. Jules awed at the scenic view. A low, wooden fence enclosed a wide blanket of snow. Trees dotted the perimeter. White-capped mountains hung in the distance, and the sun draped the sky with streaks of yellow and ribbons of orange. Jules took out her phone and snapped a pic that looked too breathtaking to be real.
“I work at that ranch. Not a bad view, huh?” Ryan said.
“Not bad at all.”
They went further down the road and passed the Rocky Mountain Elk Foundation.
“What is that place?” Jules asked.
“Looks like we’ve found our first pit stop.” He took a U-turn in a gas station across the street and doubled-back.
Several minutes later, they walked into the visitor center. Wildlife art covered the walls, and stuffed elk stood on wooden tables. Jules and Ryan watched a few minutes of a wildlife conversat
ion film before drifting over to the gift shop area. How odd it was for Jules, a cosmopolitan DC girl, to be in Montana, examining trophy elk, and having Hot Mountain Man loom over her shoulder, smelling like cloves, musk, and outdoors.
An employee smiled in her direction, and she heard a “shh” sound behind her. Confused, she turned around and came face-to-face with a giant elk head and killer antlers.
Jules shrieked, jumping out of her skin. Her imaginary bones scattered on the floor.
A deep laugh rumbled through the air. The elk head shifted to the side, revealing Ryan’s handsome face and a giant smile. “Gotcha,” he said, causing the employee to crack up, too.
Hand still clutching her chest, Jules managed to laugh.
He handed the elk head back to the employee, his biceps bulging from the weight. If she tried to hold it, she’d probably buckle underneath it and get stabbed by an antler.
“Come on, let’s go,” he said, and they headed back to the truck.
They rode along until shopping centers flanked each side of the street.
“Where are we going?” she asked.
"Anywhere. We'll see how it goes. Is that all right?"
She nodded. “If we were with Bryan, I feel like he’d have this all planned out.”
Ryan floated a crooked smile her way. “He would, wouldn’t he? We’re a lot alike, but we’re a lot different, too.”