“Xavier, don’t. Not right now. I have to tell you something and I can’t do it when I touch you.” Izzy says, tears are filling her green eyes.
Mia finally speaks. “Is this the bitch from that day?"
Izzy nods her head. “Yeah,” she says quietly.
“Izzy, what is going on?" I ask her.
She takes a deep breath and releases it. I can see the tension in her shoulders and want to comfort her, but she stands up and starts pacing the room. I can see her brain working things over, her face is showing all her emotions from sadness, to anger, finally settling on something I’ve never seen in her eyes. Revenge.
Her jaw is tight, her eyes are full of compassion as they land on me. “Marie is the one who visited me the next day, after I caught you with her.” she confesses.
“Ok,” I say cautiously. “I never knew who it was, but I swear, I never laid a hand on her. Bits and pieces are coming back to me, but nothing solid yet. I’ve blocked it from my mind. I didn’t want to remember."
I can’t take being apart from Izzy right now and I stand up. She will have to deal with me holding onto her because I’m going to be selfish and take what I need.
“X, you need to remember.” Izzy pleads. “It’s a big piece of why this is happening now, and Nolan just confirmed it for me.” I approach Izzy and wrap my arms around her waist. She shudders under my hands.
“I don’t want to remember that night. I really, really don’t.” I plead with her. Izzy turns in my arms and brings her hands up to cup my face, her green eyes have tears in them.
“You need to X.” Izzy whispers. “I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere." She gently kisses me on the lips. My heart is at war with my head and finally give in.
“OK, but don’t ever walk away from me. I don’t want to do this, but I will if it will help.” I agree.
Nolan speaks up. “It will, and I’ll fill in the blanks if you need me too."
I look at Nolan with confusion. “What do you know? I didn’t even know you were there that night."
“Yeah, I was there, and I saw her after Izzy left.” Nolan says. His jaw is set tight and a vein is throbbing on his forehead. Izzy’s eyes grow wide as she turns to Nolan.
“You talked to her?" She asks. There’s hurt in her voice. Nolan shakes his head.
“No, I followed her to see where she went to. She went to a seedy bar on Main Street. I followed her inside and she went into the back room. She approached a man sitting at a table. He was her father.” Nolan responds.
My head is full of confusion. “Nolan, you’re not making any sense. What the fuck does this have to do with that?"
He holds his hands up, stopping me from asking more questions. “Let me finish." Nolan turn to Christian, “Does the name, Bobby Calabrese mean anything to you?”
“Yes, he’s a loan shark and has been under investigation for murder, but always manages to get out of the charges. He is ruthless and doesn’t care who he hurts. If you owe him money, he finds a way to collect. He owns Calabrese bar on Main Street.” Christian says. Nolan is nodding his head.
Realization dawns on me and my heart is hammering in my chest. “But I didn’t do anything to get on his bad side. Why would his daughter come after me or Izzy?" I ask.
Nolan looks back to me, his brown eyes are sad. “It wasn’t you.” he whispers. Izzy sucks in a deep breath.
“Nolan, what happened?" She asks. He hesitates to answer, my blood is boiling.
“Nolan." I bark out. “What the fuck happened?"
Nolan closes his eyes and pinches the bridge of his nose. “It wasn’t any of us, but because you’re my best friend, Marie saw you with me and set her claws into you. It was my father.” He sits down on the edge of the couch. His fingers are steepled together on front of him. He drops his head in shame.
“He owed Calabrese a lot of money and they approached me about it. I told them to go to hell, I have nothing to do with my father. Well, she saw you race when they were looking to get money out of me and decided she wanted you. She saw you and Izzy together and she went after you to get to me."
Mia finally speaks. “Is that why she said what she said to you Izzy?"
Izzy’s body goes tense, I can feel her trying to catch her breath. She’s on a verge of a panic attack.
“Izzy.” I say trying to get her to look at me. I turn her around, so she is facing me, her breath is coming in short pants and she looks like she is going to pass out. “Izzy, talk to me. What’s wrong?" I ask holding her face in my hands.
She’s still taking short breaths and can’t answer me. Tears are in her green eyes.
“She told Izzy that she was pregnant with your child.” Mia says quietly.
The color drains from my face, but I keep eye contact with Izzy. “Is this true? Did she tell you that?" I ask.
Izzy nods her head. “Yes.” she answers quietly. “It’s why I left in such a hurry. You were going to be a father and I didn’t want to get in the way." Tears are streaming down her face. I wipe them away gently and hold her to me.
“I swear to God I didn’t touch her. Never have and never will.” I plead with her, hoping she believes me.
Izzy’s breath hitches as she tries to get herself under control. “I believe you, Xavier. At the time, things were going too good for us, I had a gut feeling the bottom was going to drop out any minute. When she told me that, I didn’t know what to do. Mia tried getting me to talk to you, but I had to leave. I had to get away and that college accepted me. It felt like it was fate talking to me. Telling me that I had my fun and now it’s time to let you go. Let you be a great father. I should have listened to Mia. She swore that you would never do that to me, but I was so hurt that I wouldn’t listen."
Izzy tries to pull away, but I’m not letting her go. I hold her tighter against me and rub her back. Her arms wrap around my waist and hold onto me tight.
“Izzy, I swear.” I start, but she cut me off.
“I know, X. You don’t have to explain anything to me.” Izzy whispers. I turn my head to Nolan and he looks so sad and lost in his own world.
“Nolan.” I say, snapping him out of whatever demons he is dealing with. “Why after all these years, does she decided to come after us now? What happened with the debt to your father?" I ask him.
“Marie is bat shit crazy. She must have heard Izzy was back and that you two were back together. I paid off my dad’s loan but made a stipulation to Calabrese. When I paid it off I told him to keep his daughter away from you or I would take care of him with the dirt I had on him. He didn’t believe me until I showed him part of my proof."
Christian stands up quickly, his body is strumming with agitation, almost dropping Mia on the floor. “Nolan, you have proof?" Christian asks.
“Yeah bro, I do. No, I didn’t take it to the cops, I have my own ways of dealing with low life scum. It’s my insurance policy that Calabrese won’t come after any of us. If you’re dirty or have skeletons in your closet, something you don’t want anyone to find out, I will find it. It’s what I do.” Nolan shrugs his shoulders like it’s no big deal.
This doesn’t surprise me, I’ve always known Nolan can get any information out of anyone, but for some reason he kept this information from me. That angers me and I have to find out why.
“Nolan, why did you keep this a secret?" I ask him.
“I had to bro. If I told you any of this, then he would have killed you. I kept the crazy bitch away from you and tried to get you to go after Izzy on your own, but you’re a stubborn ass. Now she showed her hand and I’ll be ready to take the bitch on. I will not let her get away with this.” Nolan says an edge to his voice I haven’t heard before.
Christian has a surprise look on his face. “Don’t worry bro, you’re clean.” Nolan tells him.
“I’m not worried about me. I’m an open book. I’m worried about others on my force,” Christian says.
“Don’t worry about it. Your partner checks out, but that’s all
I’m saying.” Nolan has a hard look in his eyes.
“You’d tell me if I was in jeopardy, right?” Christian asks.
Nolan smirks and I know what’s coming next. He’s been too serious lately and I can tell he’s itching to be a smart ass.
“Well,” Nolan trails off.
Mia, who’s been quiet during this whole thing, stands up and smacks Nolan on the arm. She turns to Christian, her hands on her hips.
“Yes, he would tell you.” Mia snaps and glares at Nolan. “Right.” It’ not a question, it’s a command.
Nolan laughs. “Yeah bro, I’d tell you,” he trails off before adding, “now."
Mia smacks him again. “You’re incorrigible! Why do I even talk to you?" Mia’s crazy side is starting to show and it’s time to change the subject.
“Mia, you know I wouldn’t let anything happen to you.” Nolan tells her. “Alright, let's go over that night.” Nolan says looking at me. I shake my head and tighten my arms holding Izzy.
“You need to Xavier. Let's get it done and over with.” she pleads. My heart drops again and I have sit down before I pass out.
“OK,” I take a deep breath. “It’s not going to be pretty, what you all hear.” I say quietly.
Chapter 28
Xavier- 5 years 2 weeks 1 day
I wake up in a great mood, the warm sun is streaming through Izzy’s open window, a light breeze is blowing in across our naked bodies. I wrap my arms around Izzy and pull her against me, my heart skipping a beat with the realization she’s mine. Finally, all mine.
My cock is at attention nestled between her ass cheeks. Izzy moves slightly as my hand plays with her tits, her nipple pebbling under my fingers. She lets out a soft moan and moves her ass against my cock, arching her back.
I kiss Izzy’s neck and bring my other hand down to her pussy. I run a finger over her slit. She is soaking wet for me, even while she’s sleeping. She moves her hips in rhythm to my fingers and lets out groan.
I roll her onto her back and nestle between her legs. She’s awake now and her green eyes are dark with desire.
“Morning. If that's the way I get woken up, I've really been missing out,” Izzy giggles. It’s music to my ears.
“Good morning, I've been thinking.” I tell her as I drive my hips into her, creating friction on my cock against her wet folds. Izzy let's out another moan.
“Thinking about what?" Izzy asks breathlessly. I lean in, so our lips are just a breath apart, I search her eyes.
“I was thinking, that I've loved you for a very long time, but I've been a chicken shit.” I whisper.
Izzy pulls my hair, forcing my head down to her and kisses me hard. Her tongue entering my mouth, caressing mine sending shivers down my spine. She gently bites my bottom lip, driving me over the edge.
“Then show me,” she whispers against my mouth.
My control snaps and surge into her with no barriers, her hot wet heat wrapping around my cock driving me crazy. I've never had sex before without a condom and its heaven. I pause for a beat, letting her adjust to my size. Izzy lets out a moan and grips my ass with her fingernails, digging in. I start moving in and out of her, slow at first, then pick up to a fast pace, her juices coating my cock, helping it slide in and out easier.
“Fuck me,” Izzy pants in my ear.
I drive in and out of her, hard and fast. Our bodies are slick with sweat as I give her everything I have. Izzy moans and lightly bites down on my neck. I sit up and keep myself inside of her. I have a sudden urge to watch our bodies connect. My eyes take in Izzy’s withering form, beneath me, her tits bouncing up and down and I keep up my pace, thrusting in and out. My fingers digging into her hips. I watch my cock moving in and out of her pussy, coated with her juices. Watching my cock disappear and reappear inside of her with each thrust, makes tingles start at the base of my spine. I know I’m close.
I run a finger over her clit as we both moan at the same time. Her hips are meeting mine, thrust for thrust for thrust, harder and faster. Izzy’s face is full of ecstasy as she squeezes my hips with her thighs and digs her heels into my ass. I lean back down and kiss her hard. Izzy’s body tightens up around my cock as she reaches her orgasm, milking my shaft with everything she has.
I sit up again, still inside of her and look down, watching my cock drive in and out of her wet folds, it’s driving me wild.
“Xavier,” Izzy moans. I bring my eyes up to hers, she’s watching me, watching our bodies join together.
I stare into her green eyes, hooded with desire, and see more than a friend I’ve grown up with. I see my soulmate, my other half. She completes me and I’ll be lost without her. As I drive in and out of her, our hips slapping against each other, I let out a growl.
“Fuck, Izzy I’m coming.” I grunt out.
My orgasm hits me so hard, I black out for a few seconds. Once I get my bearing back, I lay down next to her and fall back asleep, her body wrapped tightly around me.
We get up a little while later and get dressed. It’s almost two in the afternoon, Izzy’s parents will be home in a couple of hours and I have to get back to my house.
I kiss her goodbye at her door step and make my way to my pickup. I get in it and drive off. My mind starts questioning myself and I suddenly don’t want to go home. I send Izzy a text telling her I love her and put my phone back in my jeans pocket. I hear it chime in my pocket, but I don’t look at it, I can’t.
I drive around for a few hours, wondering if I’m good enough, wondering if I deserve this beautiful woman in my life. Self doubt is leaving me scared and full of emotions I don’t want to deal with right now. I contemplate all the things I've done in my life and the women I've used to dull the heartache from not having the one I really want.
Before I realize it, I'm at the race track walking around. I’ve been here for hours, questioning myself, wondering if I am worthy of having Izzy’s love. I have a big bottle of whisky in my hand and I'm slamming it down. I don’t even remember where or how I got it. I stumble a little and right myself before I fall on my face. I spot Nolan standing at the end of the pits, glaring at me, night has settled, and the fluorescent lights make him look more menacing.
I approach him and offer him a drink. Nolan bats it away and I almost drop the bottle.
“Bro, what the fuck are you doing?" His tone has a hard edge and that pisses me off.
“What the fuck does it look like? I'm have a drink.” I answer. His eyebrows raise.
“Why are you doing this?" Nolan asks. I shrug my shoulders.
“Dunno.” I answer.
“That's bullshit and you know it. What happened?"
I take a deep breath and close my eyes. “I got what I've always wanted and realized, I'm not good enough,” I answer. Anger is in Nolan’s brown eyes as he glares at me. He points a finger in my chest, jabbing it.
“Get your fucking shit together bro. You found your soul mate, not a lot of people get that, but you did. Man up and instead of wallowing in the poor fuck me attitude, go get your fucking girl.” Nolan huffs out
Anger vibrates through my body, my hands are shaking. “You don't know fucking shit, asshole." I scream, getting in Nolan’s face so we're inches apart. “I'm not good enough for her. Why can't you see that?!" I take a deep breath. “I'm not good enough,” I whisper quietly and sit down in the grass. My biggest fear is out there in the open. It’s doesn’t make me feel any better, only worse. Nolan sits next to me, taking the bottle out of my hand. He takes a drink and hands it back.
“You are good enough. You two are so right for each other. That scares the hell out of you. Is that it? You know there will be no other pussy and you don't want to commit?" He asks.
I shake my head. “No. I want to commit, but I don't want to fuck it up. If I do I will lose myself. That's what scares me. If I lose her, I will lose myself.” I whisper the last part.
Nolan nods his head and gets up. There is a hint of something in his eyes, but I can’t quite put my fing
er on it. Shit, I can’t even put my finger up, let alone figure out how to put it on Nolan. Why am I putting my finger on Nolan?
“Where are you going?" I ask him.
“I have business to take care of. Watch your back. There are things going on that you don't know about." Nolan gets up and leaves without a look back.
Shrugging it off, I get the urge to have to take a piss. I stumbled getting up and my head is really spinning. The lights on down here in the pits, helps guide me as I make my way to the weeds, stumbling more. I find a tree to lean against. Man, I'm fucking drunk. I throw the bottle as far as I can and smirk when I hear it smash against another tree.
I've made up my mind. I’ve decided that I'm not going to run away from a good thing. Izzy is worth fighting my own insecurities and demons for. I relieve myself, still leaning against a tree when I feel someone approach me from behind. My body goes stiff when long fingernails scrape my scalp.
“Well, hello there, Xavier. I've been waiting for you to get away from that bitch.” A woman's voice says, venom dripping from every word.
She stays behind me so I can’t see her face. I try to leave, but she has a hold of my hair tightly and I'm too drunk to move. I'm on the verge of passing out when she pulls a needle out and waves it in front of my face.
“This will make her leave you alone, finally. You will be mine and if she interferes again, I will kill her.” The psycho hisses.
“Izzy won't believe you.” I'm so pissed, but I can't move.
“Oh yes she will.” She stabs my neck with the needle and my body is disconnecting with my brain. My head is swimming with fear and I can't move my hands. I can hear everything around me, but I can't do anything. I’m paralyzed on the ground. The psycho bitch reaches into my pocket and pulls my phone out. She sends a message to someone and closes it. Then she shoves me down onto the ground and is straddling me, moving her hips back and forth against my jean covered crotch.
She throws her head back in ecstasy. “Oh yeah." She yells as she gets herself off. She leans down and whispers in my ear. “Now she'll believe it. You are mine.” She sucks on my neck, gets off me, and disappears into the shadows. Sleep finally finds me and I pass out.
Racing Dirty Page 17