But…it was different. The feel of his hands on hers was doing strange things to her. It was feeding her strength, she thought obliquely. If he withdrew his hands she might falter. She might not have the strength to stand up to him.
She held on and his grip tightened still more, as if it were the same for him.
‘Kelly, you can do it,’ he said urgently and she shook her head.
‘Rafael, you can do it.’
‘I don’t…’
‘Neither do I. And my reasons are better than yours,’ she said. ‘As far as I know. Is there anything you’re not telling me?’ ‘No!’
‘There you are, then.’
‘It’s blackmail,’ he snapped and she shook her head.
‘It’s no such thing. It’s sense. You bring your toys and you come home.’
Home. The word drifted between them, strangely poignant.
Rafael stared down into her eyes, seemingly baffled. She met his gaze firmly, unflinching. Did he know he was feeding her strength with his hold? she thought. Why didn’t he pull away?
She didn’t want him to pull away. She had a feeling that if she did…Well, the world was a huge and scary place. To think about going back…to relive the terror…
She couldn’t do it alone. She had to have an ally.
And this man could be an ally. She’d grown up enormously over the last five years. Men like Kass…Well, he’d taught her a hard life lesson but she’d learned it well. Never again would she throw her heart in the ring but, as well as that, she’d also learned to judge. In these last few years she’d learned who her true friends were. And this man…
This man was trustworthy. There were things in his background she didn’t understand. There were shadows-real shadows-and they must be linked to his revulsion at taking on the Prince Regent role, but the sensation that he was solid, that he was a man of his word, was growing rather than receding.
His disinclination to take on the Prince Regency did him no disservice in her eyes. How could anyone want such a job?
How could she return to that lifestyle?
‘It’s an awful thing you’re asking me to do,’ she whispered. ‘To go back and be part of royalty again. But you’ve brought the only enticement that could ever get me there-my son. I have to be deeply, profoundly grateful, and I am. But not enough to do this on my own, Rafael. I need you there.’
‘You don’t need me.’
‘Well, maybe you’re right. Maybe I don’t need anyone,’ she conceded. ‘I’ve made sure of that over these last five years. But this is different. It’s not you personally. I need your presence. I need there to be a sovereign to take the limelight from Matty. Maybe you made a mistake bringing him here, offering what you’ve offered. But you have offered it. And…and I made a call this afternoon. I phoned immigration.’
‘You what?’
‘I can keep him right here, whether you say so or not, and under my terms,’ she said, jutting her chin forward in a dumb gesture of defiance. ‘A contract signed in Alp de Ciel holds no weight here when it comes to child custody rights. I’m Matty’s mother and he has no father. Matty is in Australia. You brought him to me-his Australian mother-for which I’m profoundly thankful but now…you can’t change your mind and take him back. The laws of this country will support me.’
He stared down at her, baffled. Whatever route he’d planned this conversation to take, it clearly wasn’t this one.
‘I only wanted you to have your son back,’ he said and he sounded so bewildered that she smiled.
‘You did. It was lovely of you.’
‘I assumed you’d want to come back.’
‘That was sweet of you too, but silly.’
‘I don’t believe,’ he said cautiously, ‘that silly comes into it. Or sweet either, for that matter.’
‘Regardless…sweet or silly…you will stay permanently in Alp de Ciel?’
‘Hell, Kelly…’
‘I know,’ she said. ‘That’s royalty. I hate it and I want no part in it but maybe I’m prepared to take it on for Matty’s sake. He does stand to inherit one day and I realize it’d be very much better if he was brought up in the environment he’ll have to face. But for you…Like Matty, you don’t have a choice. You’re Prince Regent, like it or not. We do this together, Rafael, or not at all.’
‘I can’t.’
‘Then neither can I,’ she said implacably, and waited.
He stared down into her eyes. She met his gaze, unflinching. He didn’t really look like his cousin, she thought. The resemblance was only superficial. Kass’s eyes had been piercing, brutal, cold. Rafael’s…They were troubled now. Shadowed.
She knew she was forcing him to go where he had no wish to tread, but she had no choice. All afternoon the alternatives had been slamming at her, one after another.
There wasn’t an alternative. She knew it.
Rafael knew it.
‘You will take some of the limelight,’ he said, sounding desperate, and she smiled.
‘They can photograph me if they want, but I’ll bet you have women on your arm more glamorous than I’ll ever be.’
‘I don’t do glamour.’
‘Says the man who just walked into my cottage wearing a dress sword.’
‘Kelly…’
‘Rafael.’
‘You really are serious.’
‘I really am serious.’
‘So I get to stay in Alp de Ciel until Matty turns twenty-five?’
‘There you go, then,’ she said, trying to sound cheerful. ‘It’s only a twenty-year sentence. Whereas I…’
‘You can leave any time.’
‘Sure,’ she said. ‘You let Matty sleep in my bed and then you tell me I can leave any time. My sentence is as long as yours, Rafael, maybe even longer.’
There was a loaded pause. They were still holding hands. It was as if the urgency of their conversation required physical contact as well as verbal.
‘Fine,’ he said at last. ‘Okay, then. But it is blackmail.’
‘On both our sides,’ she said gently. ‘We’re forced into this.’
‘The palace doesn’t need us both.’
‘No,’ she said wearily. ‘But as it’s both or neither then we might as well get on with it. And Matty…Matty needs someone. I’m hoping it might be me, but for now he needs you. I’ll fight for that too, Rafael. I’ll fight for what my son needs.’
It caught him. Something in her voice made him pause. He tugged sharply at her hands, forcing her to look up at him.
‘Kelly, it’s not really a life sentence,’ he said.
‘You know it is.’
‘It might even be fun.’
‘Says the man who wants to flee to Manhattan.’
‘We could make it fun.’
‘Like how?’
His mouth twisted. ‘Don’t ask me.’ He glanced at his wristwatch and grimaced. ‘I need to go. Any minute now the dinner will end and there’ll be questions as to why I’m not in the royal bed.’
‘Matty will miss you when he wakes.’
‘Remind him you’re his mother,’ he said softly. Then, at the look on her face, he said more urgently, ‘It’s the truth. You are his mother. You love him already and his love will come.’
‘I don’t think…’
‘No, don’t think,’ he said urgently. ‘That’s the way of madness. One day at a time. Starting now. We can do this.’ And then, before she knew what he was about, he’d caught her chin with his fingers and forced her face up to meet his. His mouth lowered on hers in a swift, demanding kiss.
It shocked them both. She could feel it, like a stab of white-hot heat coming from nowhere. It lasted seconds, hardly even that, and then it was over but, as he released her, her hands flew to her lips and she gazed up at him in bewilderment.
Where had that come from? Why on earth…?
He was looking as bewildered as she was. As if some force other than his had propelled the kiss. As if he, too, didn’t under
stand what had just happened.
‘I guess it’s a pact,’ he said at last as he stepped back and she gazed at him in stupefaction. ‘A kiss to seal a bargain.’
‘A handshake would have done,’ she whispered.
‘Nah,’ he said and suddenly he grinned and it was like the sun had come out. He was suddenly like a kid in mischief. ‘Where’s the fun in a handshake? A kiss is much more satisfactory. Don’t look like that, Your Highness. I meant no disrespect.’
‘I didn’t think…’
‘It’s just as well you don’t think,’ he said. ‘As the mother of the Crown Prince, you could probably have my head skewered and served on a platter for breakfast for doing what I just did. So let’s just forget the kiss. Good though it was.’ He lifted his dress sword and slid it into its scabbard. His smile faded.
‘So, like it or not, we have a deal. We’re in this together, Kellyn Marie. I won’t see you now until we leave. Can you be ready to return with me on Tuesday? Yes? Unless you want to be overrun with media before then, I shouldn’t return here, and now I’m outed I’ll have to do the full diplomatic round. Tell Matty I love him, and tell him he has a mother in a million.’
‘Even if she’s a blackmailing cow.’
‘She’s not so bad for a blackmailing cow,’ he said and grinned. ‘I’ve seen worse things come out of cheese.’
What the hell had he done?
Rafael walked out through the darkened historical village and thought he must have gone completely mad.
He’d just agreed to stay in Alp de Ciel until Matty was twenty-five.
He didn’t have to. He could promise and then leave anyway once Matty was safely back in the country.
He couldn’t. He thought back to Kelly’s face by the firelight. She trusted him.
He was trustworthy. Hell!
He’d kissed her.
Why had he done that?
It was just that she was so damned kissable. She was such a juxtaposition of sweet, meek and…dragon, he thought ruefully. Life had slapped her around and that was what she looked like, that was how she sounded, but underneath there was a fierce and determined sprite.
What had Kass been thinking to treat her so appallingly?
She’d just blackmailed him into moving his life to Alp de Ciel.
His mother would be delighted.
But Anna…
Whoops.
He needed to talk to Anna before she learned of things via the media, he thought. Kelly might come across as a bit of a dragon but that was nothing to how Anna came across when she was angry.
Would Anna relocate to Alp de Ciel?
Ha.
Too hard. It was all just too hard.
Pete was on the gate, obviously waiting for him to leave. Rafael tugged a note from his wallet to leave him something for his pains, but Pete shook his head at the offering as if he was personally offended.
‘I don’t want your money.’
‘I’m sorry,’ Rafael said, surprised.
‘I just don’t want you mucking our Kelly about,’ Pete said strongly. ‘She’s had a rough trot, our Kell.’
‘You could help by not telling anyone I was here tonight. And not telling anyone Kelly has a strange little boy staying with her.’
‘You think I’d do that?’
‘No,’ Rafael said with a faint smile.
‘You really are a prince?’ the old man demanded, and Rafael nodded.
‘Yes.’
‘And the wee one…’
‘He’s Kelly’s son,’ Rafael said, for there was no use dissembling here. ‘The Crown Prince of Alp de Ciel.’
Pete gave a long, low whistle. ‘Well, I’ll be damned. Our Kelly, royalty. We always knew there was something…’ But then he returned to what had obviously been gnawing at him. ‘She’s upset. Anyone can see she’s upset.’
‘It’s been a harrowing day for her.’
‘You’ll be taking her back to…where…Alp de Wotsit?’
‘She’s agreed to go, yes.’
‘Then I’ll say something to you now, boy,’ the old man growled and, dress sword or not, Rafael found himself backed against the wall with the old man’s gnarled finger poking him in the midriff. ‘You take care of her. She’s gone through the mill, that one. Oh, we’re not supposed to know, but there’s not many of the staff here don’t know that she lost her kiddy. We thought maybe he’d died. She’s wanted to be anonymous, she hasn’t wanted to talk about it, and we’ve respected that. We’d keep her secret for as long as she wants. But this place is almost family. She might not have a mum and dad but she has all of us and if she’s mistreated we’ll…we’ll…’
‘Send the dragoons?’ Rafael asked faintly, and the old man relented a little and gave a crooked smile.
‘Yeah, well, the troops we have here may only be make-believe but we can surely make a fuss. So watch it. Watch her.’
‘She’ll be okay.’
‘You guarantee it, sir?’
Now there was an ask. What was he letting himself into? As Prince Regent he was responsible for the well-being of the Crown Prince. Now he was being asked to make guarantees about Kelly.
But Pete was waiting, and behind the belligerence was anxiety. He was genuinely fond of her, Rafael thought. He was genuinely anxious.
So once again he promised. ‘I guarantee she’ll be okay.’
‘You’ll watch over her.’
And stay permanently in Alp de Ciel? With or without Anna? With or without his business?
Anna would kill him. To make such a decision without talking it through with her…But the decision was made.
‘I’ll watch over her,’ he said weakly, and thought, Anna without Fifth Avenue? Without pastrami on rye? His business without Anna?
‘I’ll watch over her,’ he promised again and he was allowed to leave.
But the pressure of Pete’s finger in his chest stayed with him. Pressure…Hell!
He’d kissed her.
How had that happened? Why? Kelly watched Rafael disappear down the main street towards the exit, then started to get ready for bed. She undressed by the fire, thinking that she didn’t want to get undressed in her bedroom yet. Matty was too much a stranger. Her little boy…
It was set. She was going back to Alp de Ciel to take her place as mother of the Crown Prince.
Rafael had kissed her.
She raised a finger to her lips. They still felt bruised, which was crazy. He hadn’t kissed her hard enough to bruise.
But she could still feel where he’d kissed her.
She tugged her nightgown on, then sank into the rocker by the stove, flipped open the fire door and watched the flames. To leave here…
The thought was terrifying.
She had to leave on Tuesday.
There was no choice. She’d known that the moment she’d set eyes on Matty. No matter what she had to do, now she’d seen her son again she would move heaven and earth rather than endure further separation.
Rafael had kissed her.
‘And that was stupid,’ she told herself fiercely. ‘That’s enough of that. You’ve let no man touch you since Kass and you’d be crazy to break that rule now. And with a de Boutaine? No and no and no.’
On impulse she crossed to her desk and booted her computer. Her nineteenth-century cottage boasted wireless Internet-hooray. She typed in Rafael’s name and waited.
There was too much to take in. It was mostly about his work, his toys, awards he’d won, speeches he’d given. He ran some youth apprentice training scheme-very worthy.
She was becoming cynical in her old age, she thought ruefully, and then decided she’d had enough of reading about him.
She clicked on Google Images.
The first one that appeared was at a gala charity event in New York. There was Rafael, looking impossibly handsome in a magnificently cut, deep black dinner suit and a classy white silk scarf.
And on his arm was a stunner-a woman whose legs almost seemed to reach
her armpits. She was a magnificent, classy blonde and she was clinging to Rafael’s arm and smiling possessively at him as he smiled at the camera.
The caption read ‘Rafael de Boutaine and his partner, Anna Louise St Clair.’
‘Well, there you go, then,’ she muttered to herself. ‘He has a partner.’
He’d said he wasn’t married or engaged.
He had a partner.
For someone completely disinterested, there was no way of explaining the sudden lurch of loss she felt in the pit of her stomach.
‘It’s only that he’d suit my purpose better if he’s a real bachelor,’ she told herself. ‘He’d get more media attention.’
And then she looked again at Anna and thought, Nope, gaining media attention was never going to be a problem for these two. The pair would be the ruling couple of Alp de Ciel.
‘Which is what you want,’ she said fiercely, slamming down the lid of her computer. ‘How dumb are you to ask if he’s married or engaged?’ she demanded of herself as she headed for bed. ‘How quaint. It’s just as well I’m a historian because that’s what I feel like.’ She stopped herself from tossing a pillow at the wall just in time. For Matty was sleeping. Her Matty. Who this was all about.
‘So it’ll suit our purpose,’ she told her sleeping son, lowering her voice to a whisper. ‘It’s just that he kissed me, Matty. How crazy’s that? And I let him. I must be going out of my mind.’
CHAPTER FOUR
W AS there ever any doubt she’d go with him? Whether Rafael had a partner or not was immaterial. Matty belonged in Alp de Ciel. Matty was her son.
She was going.
So over the next few days Kelly packed her gear, said goodbye to the place that had protected her for the last five years and prepared to be a princess again.
She still was the Princess Kellyn, she thought ruefully. Kass had never bothered with divorce. In truth, it had suited Kass to remain married. He had the heir he needed so what purpose marriage? He’d been able to play around with as many women as he’d wanted.
While Kelly hadn’t worn a wedding ring for five years, Kass had worn his to the end. He’d married her as a snub to his father. His continuing marriage had been a snub to any eligible woman in the Principality who might have been presumptuous enough to think of joining him on the throne.
Wanted: Royal Wife and Mother Page 6