Jenni glanced at the same time Stan looked at her, their eyes locked, and unspoken words were felt. She turned and made it to the basement and outside in a flash. She put the salad on the serving table and heard two more cars pull into the driveway full of cousins. They for sure would keep the space in between her and Stan. She went back inside to get the other two salads out of her fridge and carried them out to put on the table. The four younger cousins, aged from eight to seventeen, came running around the side of the house. Well, the younger ones did. The seventeen-year-old, Debbie, was a junior and put on a teenage “look at me, I’m gorgeous” walk and asked where Lynne was.
It was perfect timing because Jenni went to hug the younger ones the same time Stan and Lynne came out the door. She turned and waved to Stan, and went back to pay attention to Crystal, age eight, and Conner, age eleven. Scott, age fourteen, went to the dock to see if the tide was low.
The wave wasn’t enough. Stan came to Jenni’s side and put his arm around her. “Where’s my hug?”
“Can’t you see I’m busy? These kiddos need their Auntie Jenni’s attention. Right?” She looked at the young ones. They got sidetracked and went off to play with the balls and frisbee.
Stan ignored her attempt at diversion and hugged her. Jenni hugged him back and melted into him. She found herself mentally feeling every part of him. He was pressed rock-hard against her, none of the softness and tenderness she remembered from when they were kids.
“I miss feeling your body. It’s been years,” he whispered in her ear.
Jenni unlatched the hug before her legs buckled under her and backed off. “Okay, great to see you.” She was saved by her mom announcing it was time for dinner and did her best to keep a distance from Stan. She sat with her cousins as Stan sat with the adults. She did hear him talk about his help in loading the logs before he drove them to the mill. The men loved his tales because they echoed an old concept of hard work that helped build the town.
The women followed his tale closely because he moved his arms a lot when he did talk. The mill had him ripped almost like a Greek statue. Jenni found herself looking away half the time.
Casual chit-chat went on until Kris got up to get more food. “Jenni, could you run into the food storage and grab another jar of pickles, please?”
“Sure.” She ate another chip and got up. “I’ll be back to tell you more about the Puget Sound monsters.” The kids laughed.
Jenni went into the room, having no idea Stan followed her. As she reached for the jars, the door shut and she jumped. “What in the heck are you doing?”
“Trying to figure out why you’re avoiding me.”
“I’m busy.” Stupid excuse. She knew it. He knew it.
He ignored the comment. “Remember nineteen years ago in the room down the hall playing doctor?” He moved closer to her.
She felt the heat on her cheeks. “Yes. I thought you’d forgotten.” His breath became hotter against her face. His presence, his closeness enveloped her. There was no escape. It was a fright that endeared as much as it terrified her.
“Never. Are you avoiding me on purpose?”
“No.” It came out too fast like she was covering a secret. She was. She loved her cousin and wanted him bad. The hunger in Stan’s eyes didn’t help either.
“I think there is. Want me to tell you?” He nosed her cheek, burning a trail down to her neck.
“Maybe?” Crap.
He reached out and held one of her hands. “You want me.”
Jenni had a hard time holding back with the truth. “Problem, isn’t it?” Her mouth searched for his but he never met hers, instead teasing her. It made Jenni mad.
Stan moved up against her body. “It is. I want you back.” He leaned over and gave her a quick kiss…it was enough for Jenni to want more. Their conversation was interrupted when the back door opened and her mom called out for her.
“Jenni, where are the pickles? People are waiting for them.”
She opened the door storage room door. “On my way.” Jenni looked back at Stan, expressing a look of confusion and love. He stepped up, kissed her again, and slid his business card in her back pocket. “My new number.”
She gave a small smile and left with the pickle jar feeling dirty and girly once more and Jenni knew Stan knew she liked it.
Through the rest of the year, Jenni and Stan texted and spent some time together besides the family gatherings. A quick bite at the cheeseburger place, or meeting at the local gas station to get a hot dog and a drink. The last two family gatherings were Thanksgiving and Christmas. The visit was short for Jenni because she was on shift and was kept busy rescuing the injured.
Chapter 2
Rain and drizzle in January made it feel like a nonstop nightmare. Dark gray overcast draining the energy from everyone. The nights dropped down in the low thirties, causing ice patches on the roads and highway. Emergency calls picked up along with EMT drivers speeding as fast as they safely could to get to the accidents.
Jenni’s shift answering nine-one-one calls ended and she was ready to leave, grab a light brunch, and put on her ambulance attire to work at eight a.m. Rachel, one of the nine-one-one workers, commented on how Jenni needed breaks between jobs. She laughed, opening the door to leave when the phone rang. Jenni stopped in place and turned to watch Rachel answer the phone with concern.
“Nine-one-one, this is Rachel. What’s your emergency?”
Jennie could hear screaming from the other end of the line as Rachel moved the phone away from her ear. “Massive accident on North 101. I saw it happen. A mid-size truck sped past a log truck, then slid in front of it, causing the diesel to slam on his brakes. It fishtailed, slid off the road, ran into trees, and tipped on its side. People are running all over the place trying to help both trucks.”
“Are there logs on the road?”
“No, empty trailer.”
“Do you know the exact landmark you’re at?”
“Five miles past the North exit.”
Jenni heard the location as her pager beeped. She ran to the ambulance on the other side of the building, knowing she didn’t have time to change into her outfit. She climbed in the back of the rescue rig and set up the equipment for what she knew would be the worst.
She was grateful it wasn’t her turn to drive. She hated icy roads and felt more comfortable having a man drive. Jenni was teammates with Yvette, and Austin Merkley, Yvette’s boyfriend. He was working on getting his license as a rehab counselor.
Arriving at the scene, Jenni jumped out the back and almost slid herself, forgetting it was slick in areas. She looked at the truck and her heart dropped to her feet. It was Stan’s. She heard another ambulance on its way. “I’m doing the log truck. It’s Stan.”
She ran, not worrying if she would fall or not. The driver’s side was on the ground, and the front window was shattered. Jenni half screeched. Hard to act professionally with the person she loved. “Stan, Stan. Can you hear me? It’s Jenni. Stan. Please answer.” She heard soft grunts. “Don’t move. We’ll get you out.”
She stood and grabbed her pager. “Eighty-four-sixty calling in. Semi log trailer on driver’s side. Shattered front window—need help pulling—glass removed—jack to pull the truck up? I don’t know. We need more help. Patient possible Code Blue.”
Normally in situations like this, it wouldn’t affect Jenni, but this was her family. Yvette and Austin scurried over, stating the driver in the truck landed in enough snow to cushion the crash and was okay.
“A tow truck is on its way and officers have now arrived. We need to clear the glass in front and see if we can get in and aid the patient, or if we have to lift the side of the semi.” Austin had a crowbar and put on rubber gloves. “Stan, can you hear me? We’re going to do our best to get you out safe and sound. Do you feel any out of the ordinary pain?”
A soft cough was heard and a whisper. “I can’t…” There were a few seconds of rapid breathing to get more air. “Feel my…�
� More catching breath. “Legs. Numb.”
“We got to get him out.” Jenni ran to the other side of the semi to see if there was a crack or opening caused by the wreck in the floor so she could crawl into the cab. Nothing.
Yvette followed her and forced Jenni to calm down. “Come on, J. This isn’t you. I know he’s family, but you have a job to do.”
“He’s more than family, he’s my best friend. He’s my life,” she yelled at Yvette. She was a mess.
They heard noises from the front and glass cracking. “It’s clear, but I can’t fit in. Jenni, you’re the smallest.”
The gals ran to the front and saw blood on the side of Stan’s face. “We can’t move him out the front. Broken neck or back will cause more problems. We need the tow truck to pull up the truck slowly and have the driver’s door open. We’ll be there to get him on the gurney,” Yvette said. “We need a crane to lift it.
“It’s on its way.”
The other ambulance left with the mid-truck driver. The police blocked the road until they knew traffic could carry on. Permission was given to cars to cut across the medium to go back on the road to go their destinations a different way.
In an hour after the recovery tow truck arrived and placed itself in the right and secure position. The driver lowered a humongous jack. Several people got on either side of the driver’s door so when the truck was up enough, they would hold the position to keep it steady.
Jenni stood back as Yvette and Austin positioned the gurney so they could get their hands under Stan’s body and lower and place him as easily as they could.
It took a couple tries to get the cab up in the right position for the rest to be done correctly. Austin and Yvette braced Stan’s neck and strapped him securely on the gurney. Jenni got back to the ambulance, opened the door, and got set to check his vitals. They pushed him up and closed the back door. Stan looked at Jenni and closed his eyes. Heart monitor on his arm, Jenni inserted a needle to start his IV. Stan’s heartbeat was down a bit, but not enough to worry about.
“Hold tight, my friend.” The trip back to the ER was short, but she went ahead and gave him a low dose of narcotics to ease the pain. She looked up at the window to see Austin and Yvette talking, and heard Austin communicate with the ER to prep for a possible neck or back breakage.
Jenni leaned in close to Stan’s ears. “I love you, Stan. Please, please pull through. Don’t leave me now.” His arm flickered once as if he heard.
On the fourth day after Stan’s accident, Jenni got him a treat and stopped by to check up on him. “Hey, stranger. How are you doing today?” She put a candy bar on Stan’s stomach. He was in close to a sitting position in the hospital bed.
“Fine now. Thanks for the treat. It beats the hospital food.” He picked up the candy bar, opened it, and got it down in three bites.
“You must have been hungry. Next time I’ll buy ten.” She scooted up a chair to sit close. “Any news? No feelings yet?” She put her hand on his thigh.
“Nothing. But I can pretend to feel your hand.”
Jenni moved her hand off. “We can’t act like this. Someone will notice or walk in.”
“People know we’re close best friend cousins. They know with your medical knowledge you would be helping me out more.” He took a drink of water. “Plus, I’m jiving with you. I’m getting some feeling back, and watch.” Stan pointed at his toes as the wiggled a little.
Jenni knew she should be excited, but wasn’t in the mood to be messed with. “Great. I’m happy but we can’t live like this.”
“As you recall, we aren’t technically related. Plus, I’m a crip now. A helpless guy. Who knows when I’ll walk again. Plus, people and family will understand you being at my side all the time.”
“It doesn’t look good and people will talk…blood-related or not.”
“We can move to Seattle. Nothing matters there.”
“Except the law won’t let us get married. I want a husband. In this situation, we’d end up hating each other.” She stood to lean over to take a chance and kiss Stan but got interrupted by a stranger.
“Excuse me, but am I in the right room? Are you Stan Miller?” A lady looked at Jenni. “Are you Mrs. Miller?”
I wish I was. “No. I’m his cousin, Jenni.”
“I’m Stan. Can I help you?”
“I’m Vallie O’Brian, and I work for Coastal Auto Insurance.”
Stan nodded. “Hi Vallie, have a seat.” He pointed to another chair against the wall. Jenni moved some in case Vallie wanted to sit in the chair closer to Stan.
“No, thank you. I’m fine. I need to set up a time when you’re available to answer some questions about your accident.”
“Now’s good, since you’re here.” He pointed to the chair close to him.
“Okay.” She sat and got a clipboard out of her shoulder bag.
Jenni waved her good-bye, but Stan stopped her. “You need to stay. You remember more. You picked me up.” Vallie expressed a questioning look. “She’s a paramedic and rescued me. Aren’t cousins nice?”
During the next week, Stan got feelings back in his legs, and with help from a walker, could walk. He was sent home with a list of physical therapy exercises. Jenni volunteered to meet with him on the days she didn’t work a double shift.
After a workout, Jenni helped him sit on his stool in the shower. “Your legs will be back to normal soon. I’m happy it wasn’t a permanent handicap.” She got a towel from the cupboard and placed it on the outside bar connected to the shower door easy for Stan to grab. “Take your shower and I’ll help you out when you’re done. I got to make a phone call.”
Stan lifted his arms so she could take off his shirt. He could take it off himself but loved the time he could get physical with Jenni. “You can scrub my back.”
“Nope, I bought you a long-handled scrub brush for self-washing. So, get on it and I’ll be back when you’re dried and covered.”
“You’re no fun.”
She saw the hunger in his eyes, the one that caused her to do and think stupid things like getting into the shower with him. Jenni pulled a face, shut the bathroom door, and went to the kitchen. She didn’t have a phone call to make but thought she should make one in case Stan for some reason could hear her.
“Yvette. Are we still on for Saturday night?” She got a glass out of the dishwasher. “Megan is coming too? Great, it’ll be fun.” She clicked the END button and got some ice and water. Her thoughts went back to Stan sitting in the shower naked. She was scared to see him naked. Heck, they kissed a total of five times, counting the first two in the food storage eight months ago. She hoped no one saw them kiss when they thought they were private behind a building or in his car.
Jenni heard a bang and ran to the bathroom door. “Did you fall? Are you okay?”
“Come in and see for yourself.” His tone was comical.
She opened the door with her eyes half closed, not waiting to be embarrassed to see Stan laying on the floor naked. She didn’t. He stood with a towel wrapped around his waist. “What was the bang?”
“I pushed the walker out of my way to take a couple steps on my own. See?” He raised his arms up to balance and took another step. “I’m determined to run a marathon in a month.”
“Try in six months.” She got the walker and placed it in front of Stan. “Now, go to your bed and I’ll get you some ice water.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Back in the kitchen, Jenni heard Stan’s dresser drawer open and close to get clean clothes out. She was grateful he dressed himself. If she had to, she wouldn’t want to put his clothes on. She’d want to lay with him naked in bed.
The TV on and pillows as cushions; Stan leaned against his headboard when Jenni came back into the room with his drink. “Need anything else before I leave?”
“An answer.”
She put the glass on his nightstand and sat by him. “Shoot.”
“Are you a virgin?”
She scrunc
hed her face. “What do you mean?”
“You know damn well what I mean. Have you ever slept with a guy?”
“Why? Are you one? I’d doubt it if you are, being a hot looking guy.”
He put his hand on her thigh. “I had a couple relationships in Tacoma, but they didn’t last long.” He was cozying up to her again.
“Sorry. Break-ups hurt.” She put her hand on his. Not good. I need to leave.
“Nah. I’m the one who called the shots. They were too air-heady.”
“Funny.”
“You aren’t answering my question. You don’t need to be afraid.”
Crap. I shouldn’t be embarrassed. “Yes. I never wanted a relationship to only be about sex. I went out a few times, but I never had the feeling of wanting more.”
Stan smiled. “Want to play doctor?” He lifted up his sheet, revealing himself. “If you don’t mind me being the one to break your innocence.” His eyes trailed her torso down south. There was not a doubt of how much he wanted her and it scared her shitless as much as it made her blush.
“Will this end in any connection with us? Will it change our relationship? I don’t want to lose my best friend.” She leaned over and kissed him.
“Nothing will change what we have.” And she believed him.
Jenni felt herself fighting common sense and her desire to sleep with Stan. She had dreamed he’d be the first, and her wish came true. She took her clothes off and got under the sheets. “You sure?”
“I’m sure.” He felt her breasts. “Damn, your body’s hot. We’ll take it slow.” Jenni returned to touching. He was gentle with her at first and soon enough, they both became animals, clawing and eating up one another viciously. Magic was made with no regrets.
In an hour, Jenni left, feeling numb. She always thought making love would be a wonderful experience but stressed a bit with how it would truly affect her relationship with Stan. When the family got together, would he keep his distance or act the same? Would Jenni keep her distance, feeling uncomfortable, or act the same? Would people notice the change? She didn’t care. She loved Stan no matter what.
Craving Forbidden (Craving Series Book 8) Page 37