by Maya Banks
“Give me your okay and I’ll make immediate arrangements for us to leave the city,” Ryan said quietly. “I want only the best for her and I’ll do whatever it takes to make her well again.”
The doctor stared hard at him and then lowered his clipboard to his waist. “I believe you, Mr. Beardsley. Tell you what. You give me the name of the physician you hire as well as the name of the hospital that will be overseeing her care and I’ll have her medical records transferred. I’ll want to talk to her physician personally and make sure he’s aware of the severity and the complexity of the situation. I’ll also want to make sure the hospital is prepared to take the baby at the first sign of distress. And that they have adequately trained personnel for this situation.”
“Thank you,” Ryan said sincerely. “Kelly and I both appreciate your attention in this matter.”
“Just take good care of her. I hate to see the young lady so sad.”
Ryan nodded, his chest tight. He’d take good care of her, no doubt, but it remained to be seen if he could make her happy again. Still, he wasn’t about to give up. He’d turned his back on her once. Never again would she have any cause to doubt him. If it took him forever, he’d make damn sure she knew she could count on him.
* * *
Kelly sat in the armchair by the window in her hospital room and stared out as snowflakes drifted down in crazy little spirals. Though it was plenty warm in her room, a chill crept over her shoulders and she shivered.
“Do you want a blanket?” Ryan asked.
She turned her head in surprise. She hadn’t expected him back, though she should have known he wouldn’t be gone for long. He’d been a constant presence over the past few days, always there, anticipating her every need.
“Sorry if I startled you,” he said in a low voice.
“You didn’t. I just didn’t hear you come in.”
He moved in front of her and perched on the windowsill. He shoved his hands in his pockets and then leveled a stare at her.
“I just finished talking to your doctor. He’s willing to release you.”
Her eyes widened in surprise.
“There are conditions, of course. He’s very concerned over your health.”
She frowned. “What conditions?”
“I’ve already made all the arrangements. I’ve taken care of everything. There’s nothing you need to worry about. Just concentrate on getting well and regaining your strength.”
She shook her head, trying to clear some of the constant fuzz that seemed to permeate her brain lately. She’d existed in a fog ever since her collapse, and worse, her fatigue had grown worse. Something inside stirred, though, as though she ought to protest, but she couldn’t summon the mental energy to do it.
When she remained silent, Ryan continued on.
“We’re leaving the city. An ambulance is going to transport you to the airport where a medical team is going to fly us to St. Angelo.”
Again she shook her head in silent denial. And she finally found her objection.
“Ryan, you can’t just leave here. It could be weeks before I have the baby. You can’t hover over me for so long. Neither can you leave your work. Your life is here.”
He slid to his knees in front of her and gathered her hands in his. “My life is with you. You and our baby are my absolute priority. I have people who are more than capable of running things in my absence. I have business partners who are more than willing to step in and take over any matters needing my attention. We’ll be minutes from the resort construction site, so I can easily oversee any issues that arise there.”
Nothing had been said of the night she’d collapsed after her emotional breakdown. It had been a carefully avoided issue, as was the matter of their future…and his brother. She could see the torment and the terrible guilt in Ryan’s eyes, but he didn’t broach the subject and neither did she. She couldn’t do it without upsetting herself and, above all else, the doctor had warned her against becoming distressed. She couldn’t afford another complete loss of control like the night she’d ended up in the hospital.
So she’d locked everything behind an impenetrable wall of ice and indifference. Any time she felt her emotions rising, she turned them off and didn’t offer objection or resistance.
And she’d do the same now. Her heart told her to object, to not allow him to take over and whisk her away. She was tired of being hurt. But it simply took too much effort and she’d expended all of her strength.
“Kelly?” he asked softly. “What are you thinking, honey?”
She moved her gaze until it rested on him. His brow was creased in concern and he was staring hard at her as if he was trying to reach in and pluck out her thoughts.
“I’m tired,” she said honestly. And weak. Heartsick. Unsure of what she wanted. Battling over what was best for her baby.
So many things that she wouldn’t admit because it simply took too much effort to explain.
He touched her cheek, caressing gently. “I know you are, baby. I have no right to ask this of you, but I’m asking anyway. Trust me. Let me take care of you. Let me take you away. You loved it on the island.”
How easy he made it for her to cede control. He was offering her everything she’d ever wanted. His love. His care. Fantasy. He was offering her a fantasy. But fantasies never lasted. They’d already done this once. Escaped from reality for a few idyllic days on the island, but when it was all over they’d had to return to the cold reality of their lives.
“I want to stay there until I have the baby,” she said quietly. She didn’t want her baby born here. She didn’t want to be surrounded by people who despised her. She didn’t want her child exposed to the animosity she herself had been a victim of.
“Already arranged.”
Her eyes widened in surprise.
“Come with me, Kell. Trust me. At least for now.”
Maybe she could stay on the island after the baby was born. Surely Ryan saw the impossibility of them having a relationship by now. But she and the baby could live there. They wouldn’t need much. A small cottage or even an apartment. As soon as she was back on her feet, she could find work. She’d waitressed. She wasn’t afraid of hard work.
And when Ryan wanted to see their child he could come to the island. For a man with his own jet and a resort that would be completed within a year, it wouldn’t be a hardship to visit his child often.
Encouraged by having a goal, a plan, she nodded.
Ryan’s relief was palpable. He leaned forward to kiss her, but she turned her head so that his mouth glanced off her cheek instead.
“I have to leave for just a little while,” he said when he pulled back. “I need to finalize all the arrangements for our departure and make sure your needs will be met for the entire trip. I’ll be back as soon as I can. Is there anything I can bring you?”
She shook her head and he rose but before he walked away, he stroked a hand over her hair. “I’ll do anything to make you smile again, Kell.”
Before she could respond, he turned and walked quietly from the room, leaving her to stare out the window as it snowed.
* * *
The flight and subsequent transportation to the villa on the beach was seamless. Ryan had ensured that she was given every consideration. She was endlessly pampered and waited on and when they arrived on the island, they were greeted not only by the physician who would be monitoring her care, but a personal nurse who would reside at the villa with her and Ryan.
When Kelly got her first look at the sprawling villa, it took her breath away. They drove through a gate and down a winding driveway that was lined with lush, gorgeous flowers. Just for a moment the driveway paralleled the beach before it ended in front of the main house.
The house couldn’t be more than a few steps from the beach. The idea that she could walk out the back door and be on the sand sent excitement coursing through her veins.
Ryan insisted on carrying her inside. He cradled her close as he walked through
the front door and she craned her neck to take in the interior.
Instead of showing her around, he took her to the glass doors that led to the wraparound porch in the back. As she had suspected, there were only three stones marking the very short pathway from the porch to the sand.
As soon as she stepped onto the porch, the breeze from the water ruffled her hair. She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, savoring the tang of the salt and the lush, warm air that surrounded them.
“It’s beautiful,” she breathed.
He smiled. “I’m glad you approve—because it’s yours.”
She went still in his arms and locked her gaze with his. For a long moment she was too stunned to find her voice. When she finally did, it came out as a croak. “I don’t understand.”
He eased her down onto the steps leading to the sand. Then he sat beside her as they stared over the shimmering blue of the water.
“I bought it for you. For us. This is your house.”
She was at a complete loss for words. The numbness that she’d worn for so long was melting away. It was as if the warmth of the sun was thawing the ice and with it, brought new awareness. She saw things more clearly. She saw Ryan. She saw him making a huge effort to make her happy. To take care of her. Hope began to beat inside her chest, but she pushed it back, afraid to give it free rein. She didn’t dare make assumptions.
“But Ryan, you live in New York. Your life is there. Your family is there. Your job, your business, your friends. You can’t just move here because we had a few days of happiness.”
“Can’t I?” he challenged.
He picked up her hand and laced his fingers through hers. “There’s a lot you don’t know, Kelly. I didn’t want you to know at the time. You were dealing with enough stress in the hospital. I’ve cut my brother and my mother out of my life. Out of our lives.”
“Oh, Ryan.” Tears swam in her eyes. No matter how much she despised them, she had never wanted this for him.
He wiped a tear away with his thumb. “Don’t you dare shed a tear for them or for me. They aren’t worth your tears. I don’t regret what I’ve done. I only regret that I allowed them to hurt you and that I never saw what they were doing to you.”
“But you wouldn’t have done it if it weren’t for me,” she said painfully. “They’re your family, Ryan. Maybe you’re angry with them now, but what about a year from now? Or five years from now? At what point will you resent me for being the wedge between you?”
“You aren’t responsible for their actions,” he said fiercely. “You didn’t do this. They did. No one else. I hate them for what they did. They are beyond despicable. They don’t deserve your consideration. They don’t deserve mine. I never want our child exposed to that kind of poison. It was my decision, Kelly. Do you honestly think I would allow them in any part of our lives after what they did to you?”
Tears slid down her cheeks. This hadn’t been her goal. No matter how much she wanted to never be around them again, the last thing she wanted was to cause Ryan pain.
“Let’s not talk about them,” he said quietly. “They’re no longer an issue. What I want to talk about is us. Can you ever forgive me, Kell? Can you possibly love me again?”
He rose from his perch beside her and went down the two steps to the beach below her. Then he slowly slid to his knees in front of her and reached for her hands.
“You once got on your knees and begged me to believe you. You begged me not to turn my back on you. It’s my turn to beg, Kelly. I don’t deserve your forgiveness. I wouldn’t blame you if you never forgave me. But I’m begging all the same. I love you. I want us to have a life together. Here. On the island. Away from all the unhappiness of the past.”
“You want us to stay here?” she whispered.
He nodded even as his hands trembled around hers. “I bought the house. I have the hospital on standby. I’ve made sure that our child will have the best possible care. I want us to start over, really start over this time. I’m begging you for that chance. Give me the chance to make you love me again.”
Her heart twisted and the mind-numbing grief that had sweltered so long in her soul silently slipped away, leaving renewed hope—and love—shining in its stead. This time she didn’t try to squash the hope. She let it fly.
She reached for him, framing his face, stunned to feel the shock of tears on his cheeks. His eyes were tormented and there was desperation—fear—in his gaze, but there was also answering hope.
“I love you so very much,” she said brokenly. “I’ve spent so long being angry, telling myself I hate you. The anger took over until I was miserable with it. It’s been a constant weight pressing down on me. It’s poison and I can’t live this way anymore. I don’t want to live this way anymore.”
He closed his eyes and when he reopened them there was such relief and such vulnerability that she knew without a doubt that she’d made the right choice.
“If you can forgive all the hurtful, hateful things I’ve said to you then I can forgive you for not trusting me.”
“Oh, God, Kell,” he said in a wretched, pained voice. “I deserved everything you’ve said and more. What I did to you was unforgivable. How can you forgive me when I can’t forgive myself?”
She leaned forward and kissed him, still holding his face in her hands. She stroked her hands through his hair and then over his cheeks again, smiling a tender smile all the while.
“We make quite a pair, don’t we? We’ve made mistakes. But I like to think that we haven’t given up. And that maybe we’re stronger for it all. It makes me hurt that you’ve given up so much for me. Your family. Your friends. The city you grew up in. And you gave it up, bought a beautiful house you knew I’d love all because you loved me. If I don’t forgive you then I’m denying myself that love and I don’t want to live without you, Ryan. Or your love. Not anymore. The last months have been the worst of my life. I don’t ever want to relive that kind of agony again.”
He pulled her into his arms, leaning forward so they didn’t tumble into the sand. He held her so tightly she couldn’t breathe, but she didn’t care. They were together. Finally. Without all the hurt and pain of the past. Without reservations or barriers.
As soon as she’d told him she loved him and that she forgave him it was like the weight of the world had been lifted. She felt lighter and freer than she’d ever felt. She felt…happy. Joyously, giddily happy.
“I love you so damn much, Kell,” he said hoarsely. “I’ve always loved you. I never stopped loving you. I went to bed at night thinking about you, worrying and wondering where you were, if you were happy, if you were all right. I made all sorts of excuses for hiring someone to find you but the truth was that I couldn’t live without you.”
She smiled and leaned her forehead against his. “Do you think maybe we can stop beating ourselves up over things we can’t change and make a pact to love each other for the rest of our lives and be happy for every day of them?”
He slid his hands over her arms, up to her neck to cup her face again. “Yeah,” he breathed. “I can do that.”
He pulled away, smiling, his eyes raw with emotion. “Marry me, Kell. Right away. I don’t want to wait even a day. Marry me here on our beach. Just you and me and our baby.”
“Our beach,” she said softly. “I love the sound of that. And yes, I’ll marry you. Today, tomorrow, forever.”
For the longest time they sat there on the steps leading to their beach. A beach where they’d raise their children. Where they’d laugh and love and remember how they’d pledged their love and made vows to stay together through all the trials that life threw at them.
They sat until the sun sank below the horizon and the soft colors of dusk settled over the ocean. And then when the moon rose and spilled silver over the water, Ryan carried Kelly down to the beach and they danced to the soft melody of the rolling waves.
* * * * *
Return to the book that started it all—the sophisticated, edgy and devast
atingly sexy beginning to Tiffany Reisz’s Original Sinners series…
Notorious Nora Sutherlin is famous for her delicious works of erotica, each one more popular with readers than the last. But her latest manuscript is different—more serious, more personal—and she’s sure it’ll be her breakout book…if it ever sees the light of day.
Zachary Easton holds Nora’s fate in his well-manicured hands. The demanding British editor agrees to handle the book on one condition: he wants complete control. Nora must rewrite the entire novel to his exacting standards—in six weeks—or it’s no deal.
Nora’s grueling writing sessions with Zach are draining…and shockingly arousing. And a dangerous former lover has her wondering which is more torturous—staying away from him…or returning to his bed?
Nora thought she knew everything about being pushed to your limits. But in a world where passion is pain, nothing is ever that simple.
The Siren
Tiffany Reisz
CONTENTS
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35