She didn't get to tell me what to do.
****
Chapter 8
Cole was at work the day I arrived back in Pavia. Jacob was busy watching cartoons and Ben was asleep. Good. Highly convenient, in fact. This would make my job so much easier.
I headed upstairs and knocked on Skye's door.
"Skye," I called out impatiently. "I need to talk to you." A long minute passed and she didn't answer which made me a little worried because I knew she wouldn't just leave the kids alone like that. "Skye?"
I rattled the doorknob only to find that it wasn't locked at all and entered the room, looking around for her. It was empty. But the bathroom door was open and I could hear soft music tinkling out from there. Baby music.
What the...?
She was in the tub, up to her neck in soap bubbles, reading a book. I just stared at her. When she noticed me, her expression grew enraged and she opened her mouth, most probably to tell me off but I stopped her with a hand. No. Not this time, Skye Madison. This time, you listen to me.
"First of all," I began roughly, "It's nothing I haven't seen before. Second, when have boundaries ever really mattered to you since you walked in on me when I was naked in the shower when you first moved in with us in Milan and then last month, barging into my bedroom and invading my private space?"
Skye's mouth was open as she blinked up at me and not a word came out. Yeah, that's right. That mouth of hers that has been running a little too much lately should be taught a lesson. Too bad Cole wasn't the type to do it. Maybe that's why she felt she could get away with it and act like such a bitch all the time.
"Third," I dragged out angrily, gritting my teeth a little, "You imply that I'm irresponsible but then you leave my sons...my son and Ben downstairs alone while you're up in here soaking and reading a book?!"
She flinched a little at my loud tone but then lifted one dripping wet, slender arm out of the water and pointed somewhere behind me. I turned to look at the pristine white shelves lined up beside the door where a multi-room video baby monitor connected to two cameras was resting. Half the screen showed the game room where Jacob was but the audio was muted. The other half was for the nursery where you could see Ben sleeping soundly in his crib. That was where the baby music was coming out of.
I glanced back at Skye whose eyes were blazing now with repressed anger while the expression on her face remained smug. It pissed me off even more.
"Come downstairs when you're done," I snapped and walked away. "We need to set some ground rules."
~~~~
Jacob was on the kitchen table giggling and squirming as I tickled him. God, I'd missed the little bugger. It had been hell without him but I was still glad I'd taken the time to sort out the mess in my head.
Skye came downstairs looking dressed to kill in a little black dress, full-faced make-up and heels with her hair luxuriously falling in waves around her bare shoulders. Honestly, women were so confusing sometimes. It was good to see her taking care of herself but this was a bit extreme.
"Jacob, I need to talk to Mummy, okay," I told my son affectionately, pinching his nose. "Go watch cartoons. And take this." I retrieved a bag of snacks and toys which I had hidden up till now from under the table and handed it to him. "Game room." I pointed towards it and spoke in a no-nonsense tone so that he would know how serious I was.
My son was only too happy to leave us alone.
"Sit down," I said to Skye who was lounging against a counter with a cup of something in her hands. She ignored me.
"Sit your ass down, Madison before I start to use my pissed off voice along with some very colourful language which I'm pretty sure you don't want your sons to hear," I bit out more firmly this time.
I would do it. She knew I would do it. I didn't think hearing curses and the occasional yelling from a parent was enough to scar any child but Skye didn't share my views at all so she dragged out a chair and plunked into it.
Removing the paper from inside the pocket of my jeans, I unfolded it and slapped it down in front of her, along with a pen.
Skye frowned at it and then up at me. "What is this?" she asked suspiciously.
"An agreement," I replied, dragging out a chair for myself as well. "For once, let's have a civilized conversation like the two adults we keep forgetting we are and reach some kind of compromise."
She still appeared confused so I sat back, extended my legs without caring that my feet bumped into hers and folded my arms.
"I'm moving out," I told her calmly, watching as her eyes grew wide at my statement. "Not out out unfortunately. I'm planning to build myself a separate apartment right next door with a distinctly separate entrance which you are not allowed to use without my permission."
She sucked in a breath and said, "Jasper, you don't-"
"Wait. How many times have you listened to me exactly since we moved here?" I interrupted, pretending to think about it. "Oh that's right. Zero. So you don't get a say in this. That space will be my own and only my boyfriend, his son and mine will be welcome in it. Got it?"
She narrowed her eyes at me. "I see that you're back to acting like an asshole again after a year of pretending not to be one," she said to me in a sweet voice that didn't match her expression at all.
I spread out my arms. "Happy to be back," I told her just as sweetly and then jerked my chin at the paper. "I'd really like us to be one of those ex-couples who don't need to drag their private matters to family court, Skye. Also, I need to make sure that when I'm spending time with my son, it's my time so let's decide on something that's both fair and manageable for us."
She chewed on her bottom lip for a while as she studied the paper outlining the days of the week and hours. I hated to do this. To know that I would now only have a fixed amount of time with Jacob every day. It hurt so bad. If I wanted to tuck him in but it was Skye's turn to look after him, I'd have to distract myself by doing something else. Also Cole...I couldn't just walk out of my room now, find him somewhere in the house and give him a kiss.
Everything was going to change. Because she wouldn't let me be.
"Jasper, I'm sorry. You don't have to do this," she said to me in a pleading tone, fixing her huge eyes on me. "Cole would be heartbroken. Jacob wouldn't understand."
"You didn't leave me with much of a choice," I replied wearily. "I can't live like this," I added through clenched teeth. "You seem to keep forgetting that I'm not your boyfriend anymore and that you need to stop trying to keep me in line." Our eyes remained fixed on each other as I spoke. I wanted to make sure I got through to her this time. "Cole is my partner and he loves me just the way I am so please, please stop expecting things from me which I can't give. You can't tame me, Madison. I refuse to be tamed."
After a minute of searching my face and realising I was dead serious, Skye’s shoulders slumped. Then she placed her face in her hands and started to cry.
****
Chapter 9
The hot sun was beating down on me as I lay there on the grass behind my house (nope, scratch that) my soon-to-be former house. Closing my eyes, I simply listened to the sounds all around me. Cars somewhere in the distance, birds chirping, wind whistling through the trees and Jacob running around playing. I felt it when the sun went behind a cloud, offering me shade and then the weight of my son's body as he crawled on top of my bare torso and lay there with his cheek pressed to my chest.
"Dad," he said in a child-like voice. "Jasper. Jasper. Dad."
I started to grin and then chuckle as he continued testing those two words like he couldn't decide which sounded better. Hell, even I couldn't decide.
"Second time in my life I realised how much I envy you," came a voice from above me.
Armaan Qureshi. I squinted up at him and then at the kid by his side. So sad and quiet. Alone, despite having a hand to hold.
"I'm not going to ask," I said gruffly since I knew exactly what he was talking about. I'd had his ex-wife's complete attention once and now, I had f
atherhood.
He let out a sigh, running a hand through his hair. "I'm a little lost here," he confessed dryly. "I know how to be friends with children. Have no clue how to parent them. This is Ziad, by the way."
The kid swallowed a little, darted a glance at Jacob and I, and then tightened his hold on his guardian's hand. I sat up slowly, trying not to appear intimidating but with a guy my size it was hard to achieve.
"Hello, Ziad," I said in a low voice. "I'm Jasper and this is Jacob. Would you like to play with him?"
The boy shook his head and hid behind his uncle's leg who let out another sigh. "This is hopeless," Armaan muttered.
I frowned thoughtfully. "It's all new to him. Give it time, Qureshi."
His worried eyes went to Jacob. "How long did it take him to adjust when you got back?"
I laughed then. I knew I shouldn't but that damned pride that came with knowing you were a natural as a father and had formed an instant, unbreakable bond with your kid even after two years apart, just wouldn't let me be less of an asshole in that moment.
"Like calls to like," I replied simply after Armaan started to regard me sourly.
A minute passed and then he lowered himself onto the grass a few feet away from me. "Jas told me you're moving out," he said in a casual tone. "What, family life not working out for you?"
Jacob bounced over to his toys and I draped my forearms over my raised knees, focusing on the house I no longer considered mine.
"It's better this way," I answered quietly. "For everyone."
He plucked a blade of grass from the ground and rolled it between his fingers.
"I'm...adopting another kid," he confided in a low but determined tone. "A girl this time. There's a long process but...I think I can get it done within a month or so."
That was very surprising for me to hear but I didn't comment.
"I want kids and she doesn't want to get pregnant or take responsibility for any..." he trailed off and stared into the distance.
I studied his profile as he bit his lip and appeared miserable. Jasmine wouldn't bend on this. If she wanted or didn't want something, you couldn't guilt her into changing her mind. I knew that because we were very much alike in that sense.
"Don't push her," I advised. "You know what happens if you push too hard." I paused and then added, "And I really doubt that her not wanting to have kids means that she'd resent you for adopting. You guys just need to learn how to work around that."
He nodded and then jerked his head up suddenly to look around before his eyes landed on his nephew. I looked as well and found him sitting next to Jacob watching my son put together a Lego house. Jacob frowned in concentration, cocked his head to study the structure and then pointed to a red piece next to Ziad. Ziad looked down at the piece of Lego, glanced back at my son who waited patiently and after a moment's hesitation, picked up the piece before holding it out. Taking it from him with a murmured thanks, Jacob went back to complete his task. But then he paused to give the other kid a serious look and pushed some of his toys towards him before resuming his building.
I found myself smiling. Fuck. That was my kid right there. That display of kindness and acceptance was the most beautiful thing I had witnessed all day.
"I need an architect," I said loudly after a few seconds. "Cole would do it but he's busy with work and this might make him sad. He's already upset that I'm moving out even if he respects my decision." I turned to Armaan who was regarding me with a speculative expression on his face. "It doesn’t have to be a big place. Can you help me build it?"
He shrugged. "Sure. I'd even do it for free if you let your son work that magic on my nephew every day. And give me some more parenting advice."
He was being generous. I knew he didn't need the money but still...
"Thank you," was all I said.
People became desperate. They did awful things. But my friend believed in his goodness, Cole and Skye did too. He'd accepted me being a permanent fixture in Jasmine's life quite a while ago. Maybe it was time for me to put the past where it belonged as well and get rid of all the bad feelings that existed between us once and for all.
****
Chapter 10
The next few months were hectic. I was busy with assignments but any spare time I had, I threw my back into constructing the new house and found myself enjoying my new, jam-packed schedule. Armaan helped me out with the planning and designing part of it but also turned into errand boy when the role required it. He didn't mind being told what to do which amused me to no extent because finally, I was starting to understand what Jasmine found so appealing in this guy. He caught me smirking as that thought entered my head once and frowned suspiciously but didn't comment.
Cole and a few local guys I had hired as help joined us in building from time to time. Jacob and his new friend Ziad, whom we mostly referred to as Zi, played at a safe distance away while we worked. There was another addition to their play dates though. A two year old girl called Aaliyah whom Armaan had adopted about four months back. Where Jacob and Zi were serious, moody types, she seemed to steal the show with her cheerful and talkative nature even if what she said at that age hardly made much sense.
Ben was in his crawling stages now which kept Adele, the nanny, busy along with Skye. We'd hired a nanny after seeing how tough it had become for her.
Madison had broken down in front of me that day I had announced my decision to move out. I couldn't not get up. I couldn't not take her in my arms and comfort her because it hurt to see her like that. She cried all over my shoulder for a good, long while until Ben woke up bawling and hungry.
Skye was too upset and his crying seemed to agitate her even more so I fed him with a bottle and cradled him until he fell asleep again after some cooing, gurgling and drooling. Soon after that, Jacob got hungry and wanted me to play ball with him as well so I told Skye to take a nap and that we would discuss everything later.
Later happened only when Cole finally arrived and I was exhausted from all the caretaking. But we managed to talk that night; Skye most of all. She confessed that she had found the girl-in-my-bed scene triggering after discovering she was pregnant because to her, it had seemed as though I had been cheating all over again. Even if things were over between us, that didn't mean she was over all her former doubts and insecurities and a part of her had naturally grown to be possessive of me since I was living with them and we were all so close.
She apologised, I apologised. We set some rules and drew some lines. Cole was upset I couldn't stay but after plenty of reassurance and a very thorough love-making session, he stopped feeling too anxious about it. Our main priority was Skye's mental health then and also making sure that the kids didn't suffer. The nanny was very experienced and had worked with mums facing depression before. She also had qualifications as a former nurse so she was quite a find especially considering how swiftly Skye had gotten pregnant again.
One thing we hadn't been able to agree on was Jacob's schedule once I started living on my own. That conversation brought out some tears because none of us, not even Cole could make such a decision when it came to our son. How do you even decide when you'll keep him and when you won't?
So we compromised. As long as Jacob was happy and well taken care of, he could stay with whomever he wanted, whenever he wanted. He loved all of us so we left it up to him.
I felt happy about it as I strolled into the kitchen of Skye and Cole's home to grab a bite to eat and Skye found me rummaging inside the fridge when she came downstairs with Ben.
"Adele made doughnuts," she offered lightly, indicating a plate of doughnuts on the kitchen table.
Hmm. I hadn't seen that.
I grabbed it and started to leave the kitchen before she called out, "Jasper, not the whole thing, jeez. Leave some for Cole and me."
Shooting her a grin, I placed the plate back in its original spot and bit into a chocolate one before winking.
"I was just messing with you."
She made
a face at me but smiled anyway. I reached for Ben saying, "Here let me take him. He could learn a thing or two watching us men at work."
Skye stepped away with a horrified expression. "Are you crazy? He's just nine months old."
My response was to laugh in a mocking, evil manner.
Skye just shook her head at me before wrinkling her nose. "And your sweat stinks, Jasper...seriously, I'm pregnant here. Stay away from me."
She shrieked when I put my arm around her on purpose then, leaning in to give Ben a kiss.
"You like it," I said to her, causing her to roll her eyes before she shoved me away.
****
Chapter 11
Skye
He was being all sweet to me today. Why does he have to do that? Why does he have to remind me of how things used to be?
I lied. I lied to them both.
It's not just because I felt triggered because of what happened in the past.
It's because...
I don't know how to tell them that after all these months, seeing how good he is to us all...his devotion to Jacob and adoration of Ben, his loyalty to Cole and respect for me, his willingness and determination to make this family work...somewhere in the middle of all that...I started to fall for him again.
And it hurt so bad when I found that girl in his room. It hurt so bad when I realised that just because he was nice to me for so long, it doesn't mean that Jasper Wells loves me. It hurt so bad that I did the only thing that helped me in that moment. I lashed out at him.
I said all those mean things to him and even when Cole tried to explain the situation to me, I pretended that I didn't care. I cried because I didn't want him to go but more than that, with the pregnancy and my depression, I didn't want to keep making him miserable with my poisonous words and attitude.
Taming Wells Page 3