Then it was like the NY Jets were about to barge through the doors as everyone prepared for the football team to be called in. The cheerleaders started chanting, jumping and looking ridiculous, and the band started playing the song that they always did—no clue what the name of it was, but it was always played at sporting events.
Of course, Blakely led the pack, acting like a douchebag and motioning his hands to the ceiling, pumping everyone up more.
I rolled my eyes.
Such an idiot.
And holy shit, the screeching from all the girls was like nails on a fucking chalkboard! I still didn’t get what the fascination was with him.
Once the gym lowered in volume, the principal started talking, along with the football coach. I totally tuned them out.
“So, this dance shit,” I leaned over and said quietly to Troy. “What am I supposed to do for it?”
I couldn’t believe that I had to ask Troy about this stuff, but I didn’t have a clue what was expected of the guy in this crap, and I didn’t want to totally ruin Cassidy’s night because of it. If I had to set aside my self-dignity for a hot minute to make sure that Cassidy’s night went perfect, then so be it.
“What do you mean?” he looked at me, confused. “You go.”
Seriously? I swear the kid was losing brain cells by the day. What an idiot.
“No shit, Sherlock.” I shook my head. “I’m talking about in preparation. I know I have to go. And wear a suit.”
Maybe he wasn’t the best person I should be talking to about this. Poor Sydney.
“Ohhh…” he finally responded. “The prep. I don’t know, man. I just do what Sydney says. This year she made me get a corsage, though.” He rolled his eyes. “She told me what color her dress was, too. My mom said that’s because the corsage has to match or some shit. I don’t know why. It’s not like it’s the fucking prom.”
“Is this a normal thing?” I asked. I didn’t want to get Cassidy a corsage, and I knew she’d feel weird wearing it if no one other than Sydney was.
He shrugged his shoulders. “I guess it’s for seniors,” Troy replied, sighing. “She asked me to get one so I got one.”
I tilted my head back and forth, agreeing. It made sense. Apparently everything was a little different when you were a senior.
I was by no means an evil bitch, but seeing how miserable Corinne looked, having to wave her pompoms when Connor and the football team entered the gym might have been the highlight of my day. Don’t get me wrong, I had no beef with Corinne, but she did have dibs on Connor for as long as I could remember, so seeing the finalization of their break up covering her face was heaven for me.
Okay, maybe I was a little evil.
But even with their breakup and even with it being because of me, nothing changed between Connor and me. Maybe he was a little flirtier in class, but that was really it. We smiled in passing in the halls like we always had, and sometimes exchanged a friendly “hey,” but that was it, sadly, nothing more.
I tried to make myself a little more visible for him. Not like the crazy obsessive other girls, but I’d make an attempt to walk by his locker every time on the way to mine, and more frequently than I had to. Abby and I even stopped to make small talk with his people around his locker, hoping to strike up a conversation between us, but yeah…nothing.
My childhood dream of Connor and I someday riding off into the sunset, madly in love (yes, I used to dream this—don’t judge, I was like five…or ten…or—it doesn’t matter!) was slowly starting to fade away. Maybe it was all just too crazy to actually happen anyway.
I nudged Abby’s arm. “He’s walking towards us.”
Okay, Cassidy, stay cool.
“Blah, blah…blah, blah blah…” I said entertainingly to Abby like I was carrying on with this hysterical conversation, totally unaware, or seemingly so, as he continued to walk towards us.
And then Connor stopped. Some dumb girl, Meredith, I think her name was, grabbed his arm and started chatting it up with him.
Ugh. Back away, girlfriend!
“Hey,” Graham said from beside me, making me jump.
I held my chest then sighed. “Hey.”
“Someone’s a little jumpy,” Graham teased, chuckling.
“No, I just…” I started, but stopped. Graham hated Connor. I didn’t know why, but he did. Any time I brought Connor’s name up it was like smoke started pouring out from every opening of Graham’s body, so I decided to keep the angry bull at bay. “What’s up?” I asked instead.
“Nothing—just checking to see if you needed a ride?”
“Uhh…” I looked at the clock on the gym wall and then at Abby. It was only two o’clock. We still had three hours until the game started. If I didn’t get a ride home with Graham now, I’d have to sit around here until then. This rule with me not driving with anyone but him was really becoming an inconvenience. It’d be so much easier if my parents would at least let me drive with Abby. They’d known her almost as long as Graham.
And then Connor butted in, saying, “Hey, Cassidy.”
Um… I totally froze. Where the heck did he come from?
“Connor…hey. What’s up?” I said, acting as unaffected as possible, pushing my hair behind my ear. I knew I had to be blushing. I could feel the heat on my face.
Darn it!
I hope I didn’t look like an idiot. It was just Connor.
Ugh! I could feel my heart rate increasing and the palms of my hands getting sweaty.
Why…why, was I acting like a complete moron?!
“We’re all heading over to Caz Pizza before the game. You guys should come.”
For real? He was inviting me to come with them?
Casual. Act casual, Cassidy.
“Uh, yeah, sure,” I said in a no big deal tone, but I needed to breathe. I was pretty sure I hadn’t yet.
Okay, I did, leisurely. Much better.
“Awesome. I’ll see you there,” Connor said in reply and then winked before he walked away, allowing me to finally melt into the floor. Not literally, but enough to relax the pent up reaction I was inwardly having from him standing in front of me, asking me on a date. Okay, not a date, but to go somewhere…with him.
Eep!
“So, uh, I guess you don’t need a ride home then?” Graham said, interrupting my moment of bliss. I’d honestly forgotten he was still standing there.
Ooops.
I looked at him apologetically. “Sorry, Graham. No, I guess I don’t.” I smiled. “Thanks, though.”
He exhaled, annoyed, then almost glared at the floor, lost in thought. I wasn’t sure what he was doing. He looked up before I could ask.
“We’re still going to the dance together, right?” Graham questioned. His eyes were soft and his tone almost sounded defeated. He was acting so weird, I couldn’t understand what was happening.
It was awkward, and the mood was almost somber.
I looked at him, puzzled. Why wouldn’t we still be going together?
“Yeah, of course,” I told him, genuinely. “Are you okay?” His mood change was borderline concerning.
A smile reappeared as he answered, “Yeah, yeah…” His hand ran through his hair. “This day has just been exhausting, and then Connor showed up…”
I was over this Connor/Graham resentment, so I cut him off.
“What is up with you guys?” I asked point blank. “Why do you have this grudge… or whatever it is with each other? We’ve been friends forever, Graham.” I paused. “All of us!”
He rubbed his face with both hands. This conversation was not something he wanted to have. Ever. I knew that but I didn’t care. I was over it. Nothing had changed. We’d known each other forever. Connor had always been the object of my affection. It’s never been a secret. I’d dreamt of the day that we’d become something more. So why the heck was it so God darn awful now?
Graham took a long exhale before responding. He licked his lips then opened his mouth to say something, but q
uickly closed it afterwards. It was something. Something was wrong. Did something happen?
He sighed. “It’s nothing, Cass.”
I shook my head, my arms crossed over my chest. I wasn’t buying it. If there was one thing I knew for sure, it was that Graham was an awful liar. He was lying.
“Graham Michael Wagner…” I began to say like a mom full of authority, but I felt a yank on my arm, redirecting my attention.
“All right, all right,” Abby butted in. “As much as I love a good love triangle, we need to go.”
She added a weird glance in Graham’s direction as she spoke. I was just about to touch base on that, too (I was already boiling with adrenaline to just get to the bottom of everything—I was on a roll!), but Abby was right. We’d already wasted enough time. Clearly Graham wasn’t budging on whatever animosity he had towards Connor, so I ended it. Let it go.
“Fine.” I glared at Graham. “But I know something is up. I know you, Wagner!” I added with a half grin. As much as Graham and his ways annoyed the crap out of me sometimes, he was still Graham. He was still my cute, quirky neighbor. There was no being mad at him. It was more of an I know you’re hiding something, and I need to know what it is kind of situation. I’d get it out of him eventually. I always did.
Snickering at my accusation, he answered, “ You have no idea.”
I rolled my eyes before turning on my heels to walk away.
“Hey, sweetcheeks!” Graham called out a second later from behind me.
I whipped around immediately, almost embarrassed. He’s called me by that name a million times, but never that loudly…and public! With my eyes almost bulging out of my head, mortified, I questioned, “What?”
“What color is your dress?” Graham asked with a devilish grin, his hands stuffed into his pockets.
I tilted my head, confused. “My dress?”
“Yeah, for the dance,” he clarified.
Biting down on my lip, I couldn’t help but smile. He cared. He was making an effort. “It’s blue.”
“Blue. Of course it is, Ms. Cazenovia.”
I simply shrugged my shoulders. There was a warmth inside of me that I couldn’t explain.
“Enjoy your pizza, Cass,” Graham added, not waiting for any kind of response from me first, and then turned and walked away.
I took a big breath. It was crazy how I could get so freaking irritated with Graham one minute, and then feel completely comforted by him the next. It was no wonder our relationship confused the crap out of everyone. It kind of did to me sometimes, too.
It bothered me. I had no clue why, but it did. The entire drive home, I wanted to kill Connor Blakely. Yeah, Cassidy and I ended on a nice note, but that’s only because I made it that way. Well, I kind of have to give some credit to Abby, too. Impeccable timing with the interruption. Shit, man! Before she chimed in, I was at a loss for words. I had jack for a response. The truth wasn’t something I was about to divulge to Cassidy just yet…or ever. I had no fucking clue me going over there to ask Cass if she needed a ride home was going to turn into that. My initial plan was to bring Cass home then go with the soccer guys to Caz Pizza. We’d already made those plans earlier in the day, but to hell with that! No way was I going to watch Connor and Cassidy together. As much as by the end of Cassidy’s and my conversation I was all like, go enjoy your pizza, no big deal, I still was not okay with it.
Connor seemed to be changing since he and Corinne broke up. He was becoming an even cockier son of a bitch, and it was eating at every last nerve of mine. To watch him pretend he was God with Cassidy, expecting her to meet him wherever he suggested…yeah, no fucking way!
I could see it all playing out in front of me. Connor was all about being Mr. Single now, which fine, I got it—there were a lot of dickheads that craved the rush and getting in as many panties as possible, but with Cass?
I ran my hand through my hair.
I couldn’t. I couldn’t just sit back and let it happen, let her get used and hurt by him.
I sat in my driveway, thinking about it all. God, it was driving me nuts. I felt like a fucking lunatic. My anger and emotions were going in every fucking direction.
I didn’t know what to do.
Cassidy wasn’t my girlfriend. I had no claim on her and no legitimate reason to be angry or jealous. But she sure as hell was my best friend. I felt the need to protect her just like I’d always done. It wasn’t about being in love with her or anything like that. It was just being there for her.
My mind was made up.
I put the car in reverse. I didn’t know what I was going to say or do, if anything, but I sure as hell was going to be there. I didn’t know what Connor’s intentions were with Cassidy or what she meant to him, but if he only saw her as a piece of ass, it’d be over my dead body.
Like any girls, Abby and I stopped by the bathrooms first to freshen up before we left school. Caz Pizza was insanely packed when we walked in, and Connor was nowhere in sight.
“Do you see him?” I asked Abby, practically yelling above all the noise as I stood on my tippy-toes, looking around in every direction.
“No,” she yelled back. “But the crowd seems more dense over there.” She pointed to the row of booths and tables in the corner. I could hardly see because there were so many students sitting and standing around them, but having been here many times over the years, I knew that they were there. “I’m going to guess he may be in that vicinity.”
“Yeah, probably,” I agreed, but I was skeptical. Getting through the swarm of people didn’t seem possible, especially since the person that we were looking for was most likely right smack in the middle. But I wasn’t going to let that deter me from hanging out with Connor. He invited me here, therefore he wanted to spend time with me. I was going to get through all of those people if my life depended on it!
Grabbing Abby’s arm, I squeezed tight so we wouldn’t lose each other, and took a deep breath. “Ready?”
It was like I was getting into game mode, ready to take on all the blonde bitches in my way, because yeah, most of the swarm around him consisted of girls. It was like a five to one ratio of girls to guys; another indication that Connor was over there.
“Lead the way, sista!”
I was all elbows-out as I pushed and weaved through the swarm. We got a few dirty looks, but I definitely didn’t care. When I spotted Connor it was like the golden gate to heaven opened. He didn’t see me right away, which was fine. It gave me a second to take in his beautifulness. He was talking to a bunch of the guys from the football team. Everything about him looked perfect. Even his teeth sparkled when he smiled and laughed.
“Uh, hello!” Abby snapped me out of my daze, nudging me forward.
Oh…yeah. Keep moving.
“Cassidy!” Connor shouted out when he finally saw me standing there. My smile literally reached each side of my face, excitement flourishing my body. “Come here.” He waved me over, pushing Brayden Michaels out of the seat next to him.
“What the hell, man?” Brayden yelled, aggravated, but Connor didn’t seem to care.
“Cassidy needs a place to sit,” Connor said simply.
Lord, my heart was going crazy.
I was chuckling about Brayden’s scowl, but so giddy, and probably blushing, over Connor’s kind gesture.
So cute!
Brayden rolled his eyes but stood, giving up his chair.
“Thanks,” I said as Abby and I passed him.
Even though there was only one available chair, Abby and I both squeezed our butts together on it. We’d shared much smaller things. This was no big deal.
Connor’s arm immediately draped behind my back, resting on the top of the chair. It wasn’t touching me, but it was so close I could feel the heat from it. This was the closest Connor and I had ever been in our lives. He smelled so good and so manly.
Sigh.
“I thought you guys were ditching me,” Connor said, leaning into my ear.
I swallo
wed hard. His mouth so close to my face it was distracting. Warm thoughts quickly rushed through me.
Lord, I needed to stop!
“Seriously?” I asked like he was out of his mind. “No way!” I giggled, pushing my loose strands of hair behind my ear as I did.
“Well, thanks for not ditching me. I feel like with as long as we’ve known each other, we haven’t hung out nearly enough,” Connor explained, his face and body still so close to mine.
“Yeah well, somebody had a girlfriend,” I pointed out, tilting my head with a little bit of sass as I said it.
Connor wet his lips with his tongue and gave me a devilish grin.
I wanted to die. He was so flipping gorgeous. Sitting next to him and being so close only made my obsession worse. Connor was in no way a Monet. He looked just as good up close as he did from far away.
Connor leaned in closer, his lips almost touching my ear. I couldn’t breathe. He was so close…so amazingly close. My insides were seriously going crazy.
“Well, that somebody doesn’t anymore,” he whispered.
Dying.
Yup, hook, line, and sinker, I was done-zo. Completely infatuated. What Connor Blakely could do to me was amazingly frightening.
Connor plus Cassidy equals sold.
My hands clenched into fists. He was practically breathing down her throat. I tried my best to put up a calm front, acting like I couldn’t care less that Cassidy was in the corner of Caz Pizza acting like that, eating right out of Connor’s fucking hand, but I wanted to lose it, jump across the place, and strangle the kid.
Cassidy was so much better than this…this spectacle that revolved around Connor. I didn’t get it.
“You okay there, buddy?” Caleb asked, leaning in so nobody else could hear him.
Apparently, I wasn’t being as discreet as I intended. Maybe the veins I could feel popping out from my neck and forehead gave it away. I broke my glare from both Connor and Cassidy. If I kept watching, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to keep it together.
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