by Genna Rulon
“Exactly,” Hunter chimed in. “We decided to push his buttons and see how much he would take in order to have you. If he can’t stand some tough questions, then he doesn’t deserve your time. It was a litmus test. Plus, we’ve all assumed that our initial reactions to him were wrong and he didn’t intentionally hurt you and Sam, but we don’t know for certain. This was the easiest way to verify he’s not an evil bastard—he’s just a lawyer,” Hunter added with a chuckle.
Sam, Ev, and I all exchanged looks.
“It was kind of sweet in a twisted big-brother way,” Ev decided.
“I should have known Griffin wouldn’t let any guy near our Meggie without careful screening,” Sam added.
“I appreciate your concern, but you took it too far. Whether he’s screwing my brains out or he’s just the attorney who represented the Varbecks, your actions were extreme. You both owe him an apology.”
They nodded their agreement, but neither appeared truly contrite.
“Good. I’m going to find him,” I announced, but Ev stopped me with a hand on my arm.
“They may have gone about it the wrong way, but their intentions were good. Don’t go after Wes. Wait here and see if he returns. If he does, then continue on your merry way. If he doesn’t, then don’t waste your time.”
I considered her point and found no grounds to argue. Ultimately, Wes was wronged and the guys would have to apologize, but if he couldn’t handle a little heat, then he didn’t deserve my fire.
Returning to my place on the couch, I listened as Sam distracted us all with funny stories from culinary school. Five minutes passed at a snail’s pace, forcing me to acknowledge that Wes was not going to return. I couldn’t blame him, but I was far more disheartened than I should have been. Not good. Maybe it was for the best he slinked off quietly. After only one night, I was entirely too eager for him to return and prove himself.
Resigned that my tryst with Wes had come to an end, I rested my head on the back of the couch and closed my eyes for a moment to savor the memories that would remain.
“I’m sorry, Wes.”
My head popped up in shock as Hunter’s words registered in my brain.
“I overstepped. I wanted you to justify your career and prove yourself worthy of Meg by doing so under hostile conditions. Last year when everything was coming to a head with Sam, your intentions were good even if your approach wasn’t. We all understand that now. I justified my right to test you based on that history. I was wrong,” Hunter finished, approaching Wes with his hand extended. “I still think you’re a cocky bastard—completely unworthy of Meg—but I don’t believe you’re ethically bankrupt…maybe just a little cash poor.”
Wes shook Hunter’s hand, looking as shell-shocked as I felt. Hunter’s apology was more thorough than I’d anticipated. My faith was restored.
Not to be outdone, Griffin picked up the torch.
“I agree. You made a number of valid points, which I’m embarrassed to say I’ve never considered. Despite the snide jokes—which will persist because you’re an easy target—you have a job to do, and it’s a job that needs to be done. I’m not sure what led you to choose criminal defense as your specialty—other than the money—but you have more character than a lot of the sleazeballs out there.”
Griffin extended his giant mitt, which Wes accepted solemnly. Again, my faith was renewed in the men I loved and respected.
“I appreciate the apologies,” Wes responded graciously. “There was some truth in your words as well. I have to walk a fine line to represent my clients to the best of my ability without breaking the law. Most people—the ones with a strong moral compass—would find my job abhorrent. I don’t struggle as much as I probably should,” he said candidly. “And we can all agree Meg deserves much better than me. But I can give her what she needs for now and I won’t hurt her. She and I are on the same page.”
“Would that be a page out of the Kama Sutra, or do you have a different handbook?” Sam asked, straight-faced, breaking the tension as only Sam could. “I have a few books I could lend you two if you need help.”
“Samantha, I could write the book on the topic of sexual positions and lend it to you, I’m that good,” Wes replied, staring at me intently.
My whole body responded to the promise in his stare. I wanted that promise. I wanted it now.
“Wes and I need a to talk about a few things,” I announced, turning toward him, “Do you want to go to your place?”
“Subtlety is not her gift,” Ev whispered to Hunter, loud enough for everyone to hear.
“If that’s not the woolly mammoth calling the yeti hairy, I don’t know what is,” Hunter shot back.
“Did you just call me a yeti?” Ev asked in a voice filled with warning.
“I believe I called you a woolly mammoth,” Hunter said, clearly missing the danger.
“You do realize you pledged your life to me ten days ago. I have decades to make you regret that comment.”
“Angel, I pledged my life to you almost two years ago. It was the day I permanently inked my body for you. You just didn’t know it,” Hunter said with conviction.
“He totally won that point,” Sam called like a referee.
“Oh, yeah,” I replied, an eager spectator.
I could see Ev had been moved by Hunter’s declaration, but our reminder of her most recent defeat restored her focus. We really shouldn’t take such pleasure in riling up these two, but it was hard to feel bad when the entertainment factor was off the charts. Not to mention, verbal warfare was foreplay for them so there really were no losers.
“Are you claiming that your vows and a tattoo grant you the right to compare me to every hideous beast in the wild kingdom?”
“Not unless you specifically make the comparison first,” Hunter qualified.
Ev stood frozen, clearly outmaneuvered by a conversation the rest of us were not privy to. Hopefully Hunter would fill us in.
“When I asked during our honeymoon what your favorite part of married life was, did you or did you not—my beautiful wife—tell me it was the fact that you no longer had to shave unless you felt like it. In fact, I specifically recall you saying, ‘I’ll be a woolly mammoth come winter and you are still legally obligated to love me.’ I believe you finished with a sinister chuckle. So you see, I was just repeating your warning to mentally prepare myself.”
“Thank god he’s not with the DA’s office—he’d be hell on my win stats,” Wes said, earning a laugh from everyone, except a still-pouting Everleigh.
“You promised in our vows to let me win on occasion,” she complained.
“And you promised not to make it too easy for me,” Hunter countered.
“Nevertheless, you called me a hairy beast. Now you need to soothe my wounded pride. It’s your husbandly duty.”
With unparalleled speed, Ev was draped over Hunter’s shoulder and halfway to the door. Hunter’s ‘thanks for dinner’ was barely audible over Ev’s shrieks of feigned indignation.
“I think we’ll make a less dramatic exit,” Wes said, still laughing at Huntleigh. “Thank you for a delicious meal, Sam, and your hospitality. Griffin, it takes a big man—pun intended—to apologize to a prick like me. Thanks.”
Wes twined our fingers and led me to the door as I called my goodbyes to GriffLo. We strolled to his home at a leisurely pace that belied my insufferable need to tear the clothes from his body.
With unexpected gallantry, Wes held the door open, allowing me to enter first. We stopped in the foyer, each taking measure of the other as if gauging whether we had the same goal in mind.
I licked my lips, impatient for his kiss.
Fuse, meet powder keg—boom!
My back was pressed against the wall and legs in the air before I knew what hit me. My t-shirt was whipped off and tossed aside, followed quickly by my favorite lace bra. Yoga pants were stretched to the limits as he tugged one leg free while keeping me levered against the wall. Too frantic to care, I left the o
ther pant leg dangling comically from my ankle. It was lucky I hadn’t bothered with panties because they would never have survived.
In less time than seemed humanly possible, Wes’ pants were down and the condom secured. He didn’t bother to check if I was ready as the answer was obvious. Entering me with one long, powerful stroke, I wiggled to adjust and assist his advance. A breath later, he was pounding into me with raw hunger, his merciless penetration just on the right side of pain.
I devoured his mouth, seeking more of him, wanting him in every part of me all at once. My orgasm built with swift ferocity. I clawed at his back, trying to find purchase to meet his thrusts with the same passionate force.
He chanted my name like a mantra, as if reminding himself I was real and not imagined.
My name on his lips was the last push needed to send me careening over the edge into an abyss of euphoria. I rode the waves of completion as his body tensed. A final thrust and he joined me in paradise, whispering my name one last time.
His arms supported me as he repositioned my body, carrying me with ease to his bed and tucking me under the covers. A few minutes later he joined me, nestling close as I fought the pull of sleep.
“What’s happening with us is special. It won’t last forever, but it’s rare and undeniable. I can’t make you any promises and I know you don’t want them. Can we explore what we have until it runs its course? I’m not done with you—it will take more than a few nights to get you out of my system, and I’d like to enjoy that time without a predetermined expiration date we arbitrarily set for ourselves.”
He was offering me the best of both worlds—life-affirming sex and companionship without the risk of expectations. I could surrender to his pull without guilt or regret.
“No expiration date sounds perfect. I will warn you that I’m moving when the semester finishes—I guess that’s a deadline of sorts—but we’ll probably be done long before then.”
“You’re moving out of Sam’s? Why, is Griffin moving in?”
“No, Griff has his own house near Huntleigh’s. When they move in together, Sam will most likely move in with him. It’s just time for me to get my own place and stop mooching off of Sam,” I answered with a version of the truth.
Wes looked skeptical, clearly trying to decipher the real reason for my move. Dammit! Why did I open my big mouth? I should have just smiled and said ‘sounds perfect.’ I didn’t owe him a timeline.
“Are you planning to move into Hensley’s resident apartments?”
“Heck no. They charge an arm and a leg for those. I found a studio off-campus for half the price when I started grad school,” I said casually, still skirting the truth.
“Sam seems happy with your current arrangement. Why leave?” he probed.
Why, oh why, was I whatever-this-was with a lawyer—cross-examinations sucked!
“There are some issues that require my attention back home. I’ve been putting it off for a while, but it’s time to deal with them. I’m taking a leave of absence from the Ph.D. program until I have it all sorted out.”
“You’re dropping out?” he asked, his shock evident. The reproach in his words prickled.
“No, I’m not dropping out—I’m taking a leave of absence. I’ll finish my doctorate as soon as I’m able. If I can’t come back to Hensley, there are other programs.”
“If you quit now, you’ll never finish. I’ve seen it happen a million times. What is so critical that you would waste all the time you invested and risk your future?”
“How dare you?” I answered angrily. “Just because you’ve screwed me a few times doesn’t mean you get to question my life choices. You may know my body, but you don’t know me. It doesn’t matter how many times you make me scream your name, you have no idea what I will or will not do in the future—or what I’m capable of. I’m leaving,” I announced as I rose from the bed. “Thank you for the orgasms, but as great as they were, they’re not worth subjecting myself to your uninformed assumptions.”
He followed me from the bed, scooting by me to block the exit.
“I want you, and I’ve enjoyed every one of the orgasms I’ve given you. Without a doubt, I know your body and I’d like to get to know it better. As hard as it is for you to believe, I also like you—independent of your body—which is why, despite the drama you just threw at me, I’m blocking you from leaving instead of pushing you out the door. Any other woman would have been history by now,” he said earnestly. “You think I know nothing about you? I know your reaction is a result of your fear that I’m right. I know you evade questions you don’t want to answer, which are any questions that skim below the surface. I know you wouldn’t give up your studies unless the situation was dire, yet you’re pretending whatever you’re facing is nothing more than a minor inconvenience. I may be arrogant and self-centered, but I’m not ignorant or blind.” His face softened as he continued in a gentle voice, “There’s something magnetic about you, Meg. I’ve felt your pull since the first time I saw you, and I haven’t been able to escape it since. I may not be your—or anyone’s—forever guy, but for right now I’m yours. Whatever you’re facing, I want to help. You don’t have to lay it all out for me, but you have to open up a sliver…just a glimpse beneath the surface. That is, if you want what I’m offering.”
“If only it were that simple…I don’t want to lie to you or tell half-truths, but you have no clue what you’re asking of me. You want me to flay myself open for you to poke and prod—would you do the same? What’s beneath your surface? You promote the image of a shady attorney. You revel in your reputation as a self-centered asshole. You proudly declare your roguish, commitment-phobic lifestyle. Is that the real you? It may be in part, but I’ve seen another side, too. To gain access to my psyche, you’ll have to return the favor.”
I was certain he would shoot me down—the intent to dismiss my challenge was written on his face.
“Okay,” he said with resignation. “Ask me anything.”
It was an unexpected boon that I couldn’t ignore. Unfortunately, I didn’t know enough about him to target my questions for maximum potency. Instinct would have to guide me.
“Why are you a defense attorney? You describe yourself as a necessary evil and defended your ethics against Hunter and Griffin’s assault. But based on the contempt with which you regard your clients, I can’t imagine criminal defense was the specialty you intended.”
“Of all the questions to ask, you pick the most challenging to answer. I should have known,” he said with a melancholy smile. He led me to the bed where we sat side by side in silence.
“Where to begin? There is no simple answer so I’ll have to explain the history,” he said as he rose to pace.
“When I was young, my mom had an affair. It completely destroyed my father. Something in him broke that never healed. He was a great man; honorable, smart, and hard-working, which is why I still can’t understand why she risked everything for a meaningless fling.
“My mom stuck around for a while and tried to make it work—for my sake, I guess—but our family was never the same. A couple years later, my dad was diagnosed with a severe case of multiple sclerosis. He never had a period of remission like some MS patients. It was a steady decline that was painful to watch, even in the early days. I guess Mom didn’t love him—or me—enough to stick around when the going got tough. ‘For better or worse, in sickness and in health’ apparently didn’t hold much weight for her. Not that I should have been surprised, since she’d already broken her vow of fidelity.
“Anyway, I was twelve when she left. Dad qualified for disability and social security, along with basic in-home services through Medicaid. They sent a nurse, who taught me everything I needed to know to take care of him, from how to properly assist him in and out of the wheelchair to how to administer his meds…she even taught me the proper way to bathe him when he could no longer manage it himself. Money was tight, but I learned to stretch a dollar and I kept us fed. By fifteen, I was more his
nursemaid than his son. I worked my ass off in school to earn every scholarship imaginable and graduated high school at sixteen—my goal was to finish school and get a secure job with benefits ASAP. I worked my way through undergrad in three years and earned my JD from NYU by the time I was twenty-two. After acing the bar exam, I landed a position with the Suffolk County District Attorney’s office and finally had proper insurance coverage. I petitioned the courts to have my father legally declared a dependent adult and then battled with the insurance company to have him instated on my plan. The coverage, along with my salary, allowed me to provide a better level of care for the last year of life. He passed away just after my twenty-fourth birthday.”
I longed to comfort him but he shook his head, letting me know the story wasn’t finished.
“I loved working in the DA’s office and I was making a name for myself. My record of wins was unprecedented and my methods were aggressive. It didn’t exactly endear me to my coworkers but they had to deal with me—I was too good to get rid of. I’ve never been a knight in shining armor—more like the dark knight caked in mud and gore—but I started out in the DA’s office determined to prosecute criminals and protect the innocent. It was fulfilling and I had no plans to leave, however what I plan and what life throws my way are rarely one and the same.
“About a year after my dad died, my mom showed up out of the blue. I hadn’t received so much as a birthday card in over ten years, yet there she stood telling me she’d been diagnosed with an aggressive form of breast cancer. Of course, she had no insurance, no money to her name, and no one to take care of her. She’d heard through the grapevine that Dad was gone and I was ‘doing well for myself’ and decided it was my duty to help her. She cried and offered a myriad of half-hearted apologies until I explained there was nothing I could do to help her. I couldn’t fight for dependent status because she would never qualify, as she was still physically autonomous. The last of my dad’s medical bills hadn’t even been paid off at that point, so I certainly wasn’t rolling in dough that I could loan her to live on. She eventually left, only to return six months later, knocking at death’s door. There was a treatment the doctors swore would give her a chance, but Medicaid wouldn’t cover it. God—I didn’t want to let her in my life and I sure as shit didn’t feel obligated to take care of her, but I couldn’t let her die, knowing I had the power to prevent it. I may be a lot of things, but I wouldn’t become a monster.