by Elise Jae
Blinking, Cindy looks first at me, and then at Core. “That’s an interesting side effect of the bond I haven’t encountered before.”
“I would guess,” I say, moving so I’m as close as I can be to him. “That there are going to be a lot of things you haven’t encountered before.”
I think of how he looked when Hannah was here.
“You can tell them.” He says quietly.
“His eyes glowed.”
“What?” It’s Richter who says it from behind us.
“There was a… situation earlier. It’s what dragged me back to consciousness. Something from the changes in me created what felt like a fusion reaction inside of me.”
“It looked like there was a star inside of him.”
It’s quiet for a heartbeat before...
“Pure energy drawn from your cells by anger.”
We all look at Richter.
His mouth twisted in a scowl, he looks between his brothers.
“The Maker talked about it. It was a goal he had. I watched three of his victims die… consumed by it. A white flash, like a nova. And then, they were nothing.” His gaze drops to the ground. “If the trio hadn’t burned the facility to the ground, I would have done the same the next day.”
Everything about the Maker makes me want to go back in time and hurt him the way he hurt so many others. “Have I mentioned that if he wasn’t dead already, I’d gut him myself?”
“You’re the only one I’d trust to do it right.” Fault drags me up onto the table to sit beside him, wrapping his arm around me and pulling me close.
I let him, because I need to touch him.
Cindy scowls at the readout, tapping through things. “Your metabolism has completely changed. You’re going to be hungrier. And, you should be aware… everything I’ve given you to try to help has burned out of your system in minutes—sometimes before it could even start to perform its purpose.”
“I don’t appear to have needed it.
“What I’m getting at is that I don’t think anything is going to work. Not even the suppressant. I know you said you were planning to wait.”
“Drift will be so pleased.” He says it with the sort of drawl that couldn’t be mistaken for anything but sarcasm.
“Drift can go fuck himself.”
Turning, just a little bit away from us, Cindy looks uncomfortable.
FAULT
Before the others can get too uncomfortable, I pull Wren closer, and half whisper, “Save it for him.”
She casts me a glance and I know she’s not going to say anything else while they’re here.
And it’s time to send them away anyway.
“Thank you, for all your help, but you need to head to the hospital.” I look at Cindy and then my charts behind her. “Whatever this is can wait. Kimba is going to want your support.”
“Why?” Richter says it in the same moment Cindy’s comm chirps.
“Oh! She’s in labor.” Cindy hurries out of the room, Core close on her heels.
As we follow them out, Ric gives me a look. “I think you’ve got some fun new tricks to explain.”
“Later.”
“The next meeting is going to be fun.”
I let him go without correcting him.
“We won’t be at the next meeting.” I say, wrapping my arms around Wren’s shoulders as the door closes once again. “We’ll give Drift and Kimba the opportunity to show off their kid.”
“You would definitely overshadow that.” Turning in my arms so she can wrap hers around my neck, she tugs me closer, just holding me.
The same emotion washes over me that has been like a tide since the Maker gassed me. It’s a sort of exhaustion I’ve never felt.
“You’ve run yourself ragged taking care of me. You need to sleep.”
“I need a little more than that.” I can feel exactly what she means and I grit my teeth against the two desires coiling inside me.
“Sleep, Wren. The rest can wait.”
Because I have absolutely no idea how I’ve actually changed, and I learned long ago that the Maker couldn’t be trusted. There has to be more to what he’s done to me than what we’re able to see… or sense.
But Wren is tired and I don’t want her to sacrifice anything because of what he’s done.
Scooping her up, I carry her downstairs and relish the way she tucks her head against my chest, the contentment that rolls off of her…
I only let her go long enough to help her out of her shoes and pants, then I drag her into bed and settle her, tucking the blanket tightly around her so she doesn’t get any ideas.
“Spoil sport.”
“I don’t know what that means.”
“Yes you do.” She yawns and tucks her hand under her head. “Even if you don’t, you do.”
There’s a weight that has lifted from us both, and I’m willing to sink into this respite, even if I don’t know how long it will last.
Her sleepy words are soft, thick and dreamy. “I was terrified I was going to lose you.”
“You didn’t.”
Eyes closed, hand curled under her cheek, she looks so small… so breakable as she drifts off in my arms.
A few minutes later, her breathing evens out. She’s lost too much sleep over me and her body’s making up for it.
It’s making me drowsy too.
But I can feel so much more through the bond now… and I know she can too, even if she hasn’t yet realized it.
I brush a kiss over her forehead. “I love you too.”
Thirteen
WREN
The next meeting came and went, the Brotherhood abuzz with their latest addition.
Kimba’s beautiful baby burbled and cooed as I accepted the call and both momma and baby appeared on the screen.
“I thought you might like to meet Alyx since you weren’t able to come to the meeting.”
“They’re beautiful.” Some people thought babies were mushed little potatoes until they were of a certain age, but I’d never felt that way. “I want to reach through the screen and steal your sweet thing.”
“You’ll have one of your own soon enough.”
“Drift won’t like you saying that.”
“He’s working on his issues.”
“I hope so.”
She adjusts the baby and looks at me as if she’s looking for something. “How are you two doing? Cindy says he’s perfectly fine, but that’s just an assessment based on medical readouts. Is everything okay?”
“Well, it’s not normal, but yeah. The gas doesn’t seem to have done anything specifically harmful to him… just the physiological changes.” And some other things I’m not sure how to explain yet.
“So,” Kimba says, mouth screwing into a purse before she continues. “The next meeting—the real reason I called.”
“Yes, the big reveal.” I glance at Fault who’s sitting at the table out of sight, staring out into the white distance. “I assume you’ll want us to show up late, so everyone gets to freak out at the same time.”
“Yes, we’ve asked Cindy, Core, Laurel and Richter to not say anything… so you’re definitely going to surprise the rest of them.”
“You don’t want to give them warning?”
“I haven’t seen him, so I can’t be sure.”
Fault comes to me without my having to call him, and I hold out my hand when he’s close enough to take it. Being able to touch him is soothing.
When he’s visible to her, Kimba sits up straight on her couch, brows pinched, but smiling. “Oh, honey. They aren’t going to know what to do with you.”
She studies him for a long moment. “I don’t think we should warn them. They may not see you often, but they all like you. I don’t think anyone’s going to attack.”
“Not even Jessica?”
“Don’t worry. I’ll make sure Drift has this little one, so I can hold Jess back.”
Because the sian biologist of the group was likely going to want to se
e and touch and poke and prod.
“If she tries anything, she’ll have to go through me.”
Kimba smiles so widely, I know she’s holding back a laugh. “We’ll see you soon.
The call disconnects and I look back and up at him. “How bad do you think it’s going to be?”
“It’s going to be worse for Drift in the end.”
It’s unsettling how sure he is of that… as if he can see the future.
Letting out a low sigh, he wraps his arms around me and buries his face in my hair. “Maybe I can.”
FAULT
Kimba’s reaction had been calmer than I expect the others to be. But she did have warning. I don’t know what will happen when we walk through the door to her home.
Walking to the kitchen I start making lunch, the routine methodical, the food something I’ve eaten dozens of times.
When I slide a plate to Wren, she fixes me with a glare. “You’re very focused on distracting me with food.”
“Distracting me from what?”
She doesn't say anything, but I feel the sudden spike of lust. And when I look at her, I’m wary.
She’s right. I have been avoiding it. She’s seen the changes, and I know she’s not worried, but I am.
“What if I hurt you?”
“If you’re referring to those ridges that have gotten more pronounced…. You won’t.” She moves around the counter to me, hands sliding up my chest. “I know you. And I know that you are the one person on this planet who never could.”
I’m not so certain. “The Maker—”
“The Maker was hell bent on the Brotherhood’s propagation after he was ‘finished’ with you. I refuse to believe he would do anything to you that might hinder that.”
“He can’t control every variable. Especially now that he’s dead.”
“I’m giving you a week.” She holds up her hand, because she’s not going to let me argue with her. “After that, I better have you inside of me.”
Jaw clenched, I know what I’m about to say isn’t going to sway her, but.... “What about the pregnancy thing?”
Her brow pinches and I know she’s mad I’d even consider it. “There needs to be more of you in this world. I don’t care what Drift wants or doesn’t want. I care what you want.”
And I want children. Now that they’re a possibility, I realize that I’d shut that desire down, More than that, I want to give her children. Seeing how happy she was to meet Kimba’s child....
“Alright. Within a week.”
But not quite yet.
Because I’m still not certain.
And there’s been something percolating in my mind. Something ugly and terrifying.
“I am going to go outside for a little bit. No matter what you feel, I need you to promise you’ll stay in here.”
She doesn’t like it, but she agrees. “You’re not going to tell me what you’re doing, are you?”
“I need to know what happens when I get mad. If I hadn’t been able to calm down when Hannah was here….” I shake my head. It felt like I was going to explode.
“Will you promise me you won’t hurt yourself?”
“Like you said. The Maker didn’t want us to do certain things… killing myself would be counterproductive to his goals.”
She scowls at me. “That’s not a promise.”
Pulling her close, I kiss her, wanting nothing more than to hold her close and never let her go. “I promise.”
She lets me go, and I don’t bother with any extra clothing when I step out into the snow. My body temperature fluctuates to compensate, and the further into the snow I get, the warmer I feel.
I could do this at the bottom of the slope. But I don’t want Wren to see… just in case.
So I head through the snow, each step a struggle, until I’m on the other side of the promontory that blocks our view of Hazard’s territory.
There’s an empty patch of snow. A flat area that seems to have nothing around it, and when I get to the middle of it… I sit.
It shouldn’t surprise me that the snow still has no effect. That I could be seated on my couch for all the chill bothers me.
And now… the unpleasant part.
It’s not hard to think of things that make me angry.
Drift… the Maker….
Both of them chose to trap me in this life.
But it’s what the Maker almost did to Wren that boils my blood.
The mistake of an Agency escort that put her in the path of a monster far and away worse than the ones we were commissioned to fight.
The idea of her pregnant with that maniac’s child. The idea of him cutting it out of her to sell to the highest bidder…
I know the Maker had him killed in prison.
If he hadn’t I might have strangled the man myself.
Static clings to the air around me. And when I open my eyes, everything is a golden haze.
The Maker used Wren to do this to me. He used her from the moment he found her.
My muscles ache from how I’ve clenched them. My palms burn from my fingers digging into the skin.
Everything hurts. I’ll never get away from that man who cut me open a hundred times, when he should have….
I feel Wren’s worry through the bond, and that’s what tips me over the edge.
A blinding light bursts from me all heat and power and—
I open my eyes and the gold haze is gone… the snow is gone.
I’m in a crater of my own making. Dry rocks and ground.
And no clothes.
They burned off me in the heat of that release.
But I’m still not cold.
Whatever he did to me… it’s destructive, and I don’t know what to do with it.
The walk back to the outpost is shorter. There’s less snow to trudge through. I’d guess I evaporated ten meters worth in all directions… a circle of potential death.
Wren is waiting for me when I get back inside.
She may not have seen it, but she knows.
Fourteen
WREN
I feel a different kind of apprehension when we get to Drift’s garage this time. And I don’t know if it’s his or mine.
Probably a mixture of both.
But Fault doesn’t hesitate as he pushes the door open and lets me precede him inside.
It goes about the way I’d expect, and I take his hand while they go through the predicted stages.
The conversations in the room drop off one by one until we’re met with utter silence. It’s broken by Arc—of course it is.
“Saints, what happened to you?”
“It seems like every time you show up to a meeting, it’s because you have something new and wild to share with us.” Jessica looks at him with a fascination fully related to her profession. “That is so cool.”
“Don’t make me jealous.” Trench says from beside her, but it’s with a smile.
Her fists clenched at her side, I can tell Jessica’s holding back a hundred questions. I would love to indulge her right now—it’d be a distraction—but that’s not my call.
“So, you have something you want to tell us?” Laurel asks, looking between us. “Now that Drift’s been forced to rescind his gag-order, that is.”
I grip his hand tighter. I won’t leave his side, even if he asks me to go.
I always want you at my side.
“The Maker was my father.” He says it lowly, but everyone has hushed to hear. “We all know he did different things to us. Toying with our genetic makeup and piecing us back together after he broke us.”
No one in the room looks happy at that reminder.
“He managed to twist the knife in me one final time from beyond the grave.”
Before anyone can ask questions, I say. “There’s an outpost dug into the inner walls of the caldera. He left behind equipment that inoculated Fault with a protein chain that did this.”
“But it would only have affected you?” Trench asks.
>
It’s Cindy who answers. “According to my check of all your DNA records, Fault is the only one with the genetic marker this protein could latch onto.”
“He left the information, named the base after me… it was a trap and I walked straight into it.”
“Are there any other changes we can’t see?” Jess has a tablet out and is typing on the screen without looking at it.
He hesitates. “If I get angry, I get hot. If I don’t calm down….”
He looks at me and I know he’s trying to decide how to say it, but… “He turns into a mini-sun, incinerating everything around him.”
It’s so quiet, I can hear Laurel swallow.
Fault’s smile is self deprecating and he looks at the floor. “Don’t worry. If I'm about to go, you’ll know.”
“You’ll see it in his eyes.”
Cindy and Jess are both taking notes.
“Whoa.” Cindy says. It’s low, but everyone in the room hears it.
Drift, still spun tight asks, “What?”
“Maybe the Maker liked you more than the others after all.” She turns the screen to us. “Your cells are regenerating like you’re a kid again.”
“What does that mean?”
Shrugging, Cindy says, “He’s gonna heal super fast… Have your scars started to fade?”
He looks at me for the answer, and I nod.
“Don’t get your hopes too high, but with this kind of regeneration… you could probably life forever.”
“You’re saying he got the girl, got the fun new face… and he’s immortal now?” Arc laughs as if he’s never heard anything quite as funny. “I don’t know if I’d call that luck, or a curse.”
The room devolves into scattered conversations, and Fault tugs me toward the empty edge of the couch. He sits, pulling me into his lap, and we listen as the others throw around thoughts, jokes… random ideas.
Our input isn’t needed, so I let myself enjoy the quiet of Fault’s calm.
It takes a while, but I realize that Arc is glaring at Drift. “This is why he hasn’t been to any of the meetings, isn’t it?”