by Dena Christy
“I think it bothered you more, especially the ass slap. I saw your reaction. I thought for a second that you were going to tear the wolf’s head off.” She looked at him from the corner of her eye and she could see the muscle flex in his jaw.
“I was going to. If Logan hadn’t intervened, I would have.” He sighed. “I didn’t like the way they looked at you. It was disrespectful.”
“I can’t do anything about how customers look at me, and as far as the ass slap went, Logan made it clear that this type of behavior wouldn’t be tolerated. Do you want to know why I want to keep working there? When I was serving drinks, interacting with people and joking with Alex, I didn’t have to think about Quinn. For the first time since he died, I had a night where I wasn’t crushed by the hole his death brought into my life.”
Her throat prickled and she blinked her eyes rapidly. She wouldn’t cry.
Rafe sighed and rubbed his hand over his jaw. “I noticed that you seemed lighter than you had in a while. Just don’t run yourself ragged doing this.”
“It’s only part-time. Tonight was supposed to be a trial run because Logan said Tuesdays are usually quiet. If tonight was supposed to be a quiet night, I’d hate to see what busy looks like.” Honor yawned and scooted a little closer to him. She curled her feet up so they were resting on the couch. She put her head on his shoulder and he stiffened for a second. Maybe she should move away, but she was tired and she enjoyed sitting here like this with him.
“This wasn’t a normal Tuesday night. I suspect that almost everyone came out to check out Logan’s new waitress.” He seemed to get used to her leaning against him and he put his arm around her shoulder, tucking her closer to his side. “I’m sure it won’t be as bad the next time you go in.”
“I hope not.” Honor stifled another yawn and closed her eyes.
“And I think you’ve had enough for one night. Time to head up the stairs.”
Oh God, she’d forgotten about the stairs. She winced at the thought of walking all the way up them on her sore feet. As she straightened up and put her feet on the floor, she wished she could just stay here, cuddling with him on the couch. Unfortunately, they didn’t have that kind of relationship.
She stood up and closed her eyes as pain shot through her feet.
“Do you want me to carry you upstairs?” He stood up beside her and put his hand on her back.
“Would you mind?” Not only would it save her from pain in her feet, but she had to admit that she enjoyed feeling just how strong he was.
“I don’t mind.”
She reached for him and he scooped her up in his arms. For a second she wished he was carrying her upstairs to make love with her. She tucked her face against the warm skin of his neck and pushed the thought from her head. Sex would only complicate an already complicated situation, and once their fake mating was over she needed to be able to walk away from him. Having a mate was not what he wanted, he’d said so before. He’d already done so much for her that she didn’t want to complicate his life more than necessary.
He carried her up the stairs and into her darkened bedroom. He let go of her legs and her feet came to rest on the floor. The silence between them thickened. She looked up at him and her eyes darted down to his mouth.
“Good night, Rafe.” More than anything she wanted him to lean down and kiss her. She wasn’t sure if it would lead directly to the bed behind them, but she wanted to feel his lips on hers.
He stood there looking at her for a long time, and his mouth pulled up in the lopsided smile of his. He leaned down and kissed her on the forehead.
“Good night.” And with that he turned and walked out of her bedroom, closing the door behind him.
Honor sank down on the edge of her bed, and disappointment settled inside her. It was silly of her to think that something was going to happen between them tonight. Despite his apparent jealousy, it was clear that this mating would be in name only. The sooner she got used to it, the better it would be for her.
Rafe was packing away his tools at the end of the day, and he couldn’t wait to get home. Honor wasn’t working at the bar tonight, thank God. He didn’t know if he could go through another night like the one he had last night. Sitting there watching all those wolves ogle her and trying not to react to it had taken all his willpower. He’d gone to the gym this morning and pounded the heavy bag extra hard. It hadn’t helped.
He’d been so close to kissing her last night too when they’d stood in her darkened bedroom. He’d seen her eyes dart down to his lips and it would have been so easy to pull her into his arms. Instead, he’d kissed her forehead and gone to his big bed by himself.
His cell phone rang, and he pulled it out of his pocket. It was Honor, and he hit the accept button and put the phone to his ear.
“Hey, what’s up?” He hoped she wasn’t calling him to tell him that she was going in to work tonight. He didn’t think he could go through a repeat of last night again so soon.
“Are you going to be home soon?” Her voice sounded a little shaky and his grip tightened on the phone. Something was wrong and his mind raced over what it could be. Had Barrett done something?
“I’m just packing up now. Is something wrong?”
There was a pause on the other end of the phone and he heard her blow out a slow breath. “Luke is coming over shortly to talk to me about the result of the investigation into Quinn’s accident. I was hoping you could be here with me.”
Rafe closed his eyes for a second. He’d known this had to happen, but he dreaded what the deputy sheriff was going to tell them.
“I’ll be home as soon as I can.” He hung up the phone and stuffed the rest of his tools in his tool bag. His footsteps were rapid when he walked out of Grace’s house and headed for his truck.
He got home as quickly as he could, and when he pulled into the driveway Luke was just getting out of his patrol car. The deputy waited for Rafe to come abreast of him and he reached out his hand.
“Luke.” Rafe shook his hand and together they walked to the door. A knot formed in Rafe’s stomach and he dreaded what Luke would have to say about Quinn. Were his and Honor’s fears that Quinn’s accident had been deliberate about to be realized? He had no way of knowing since Luke’s unsmiling face was neutral.
He walked in the house and Honor was standing in the middle of the living room. He could tell by the look on her face that she was as nervous as he was about what Luke was going to say. He strode over to her and pulled her into his arms. He was glad that she’d called him and he’d gotten here in time. This wasn’t something he wanted her to go through alone. Regardless of what Luke had to say about Quinn’s accident, she was going to need support and he wanted to be the one who gave it to her.
Together they turned to face Luke, with Honor standing by his side with his arm around her. He wished he could spare her the pain he was certain was coming for her, but if she was going to move forward from her brother’s death she needed to know what really happened to him. And if it turned out that Quinn’s death wasn’t an accident, he hoped that the authorities found who was responsible. They wouldn’t have to look any further than Eden Creek’s new alpha.
“Okay, I’m not going to drag this out, since you both probably want to know what happened to Quinn. We conducted a thorough investigation of the scene, and based on the accident investigator’s findings, the sheriff has concluded that it was an accident.”
Honor sagged against him and he tightened his arms around him. He closed his eyes for a second. This was not what he’d expected to hear.
“How did it happen?” Honor’s voice was quiet as she straightened slightly and he loosened his hold but didn’t let go of her completely.
“He was driving at a high rate of speed and it appears that an animal must have darted into the road. He swerved to avoid it, but lost control of his vehicle.” Luke paused, and there was a look of sadness in his eyes when he looked at Honor. His lips pressed together for a second and it was l
ike he didn’t want to tell her the rest. “There were no guardrails on that stretch of road, and the car flipped down the embankment. It landed on the roof and he was crushed.”
Honor gasped and put her hand on her mouth. Rafe's muscles tightened at the picture the deputy painted of Quinn’s last moments. He looked down at the woman beside him, and his heart went out to her. Honor’s face was pale, and Rafe could see she was barely holding herself together.
“Did he suffer?” Her voice was barely audible, and Rafe’s chest was tight when he saw the pain in her eyes and heard it clearly in her voice.
“He died instantly, so no he didn’t suffer.” There was compassion on Luke’s face when he looked at Honor. “I would like to say again how sorry I am for your loss.”
Honor nodded. “Thank you.”
“Do you have any other questions?”
“No. Thank you for coming, Luke.” Honor straightened away from Rafe and reached her hand out to Luke. He took it in his but didn’t shake it. He held it for a moment before letting it fall away.
“I’ll just leave you now, but if you think of anything you want to know, call me. I’ll show myself out.” Luke nodded to Rafe and turned on his heel. He glanced back at them one more time before walking out of the house. The front door closed behind him, and the silence in the house was deafening. It was soon filled by Honor’s shaky voice.
“I was so sure that Barrett had something to do with it. At least then it would have made sense.” Honor drew in a deep breath and released it slowly. She trembled slightly and Rafe moved closer to her. He put his arm around her and she looked up at him, her lower lip trembling. “I always told him that he drove too fast and that it would kill him someday. Why couldn’t he listen?”
Her voice broke on her last sentence, and he pulled her tight into his arms. Like Honor, he’d been sure that Barrett had been responsible for Quinn’s death. He suspected that for both of them it was easier to accept someone killing him to get what they wanted. An accident, particularly if it was one that was the result of Quinn’s own carelessness, was so much harder to deal with.
As he held Honor in his arms and she cried against his chest, he felt anger at Quinn for the first time since he’d died. He’d always had a reckless streak, even when they were kids. Why hadn’t he grown out of it? He had so much in his life that was worth living for. He was alpha of his pack, and he had a responsibility to Honor to look out for her and protect her from douche bags like Barrett Todd. How could he have been so reckless with his life?
Honor stepped back and swiped her hands across her face.
“Are you going to be okay?” She moved around the living room like a caged animal, and Rafe hated seeing her like this. He would do anything to take the pain out of her face. “Honor?’
“I have to get out of here.”
She headed for the back of the house and went out on to the back porch. Thank God she hadn’t headed out the front door to her car. The last thing she needed was to get behind the wheel. His boots thumped on the hardwood floor as he followed her out the back. She looked over at him, and the grief in her eyes sent a knife blade straight into his heart.
“I need to run.” She pulled her shirt off over her head and he averted his eyes from her, to give her some modicum of privacy. Nudity wasn't viewed the same way by werewolves as it was by humans, but there was a part of him that wanted her, and he didn’t want seeing her nude body to add fuel to that fire. There was a rustling of clothes as she stripped, and he gave her a few more moments to complete her change.
A soft whine came to him and he looked over at her. She was sleek and beautiful in her wolf form. Her reddish fur ruffled in the breeze coming across the porch, but what hit him hardest was the sadness he could see in her deep brown eyes. She looked at the woods and then back at him.
“Okay.” He stripped off his jacket and pulled his shirt off over his head. His boots and jeans soon followed as she padded down the porch steps and went to stand at the edge of the woods. He closed his eyes and embraced his change.
Once it was complete, he went down the porch steps and headed toward her. Her body trembled at the edge of the woods, and he knew the urge to outrun her pain was building inside her. As soon as he joined her she took off running towards the woods.
He took off after her, holding back his speed and power as she ran ahead of him. She needed this run to work through the emotions churning inside her, and to achieve clarity. He was only there to provide support, so he let her run. She was always in his sight because while he didn’t think anything would happen to her out here, being in this form, knowing that she was his mate, raised all his protective instincts.
She slowed, and her sides moved in and out from her exertions. She raised her head and a mournful howl was ripped from her throat. He came to stand beside her and tipped his head back. His howl joined hers, and the sorrowful sound of their wolf voices pierced the quiet of the woods as they said goodbye to Quinn in their own way.
She lowered her head and moved toward him. His body was much bigger than hers, and she pressed her face against his neck. He tucked his head around her and they stood like that for a long time as they both tried to process their grief over the man who’d meant so much to both of them.
It was dark by the time they pulled away, and they turned back to go home. There was no running this time, and Rafe kept his big body close to hers as they made their way out of the woods. The house came in sight and they went up the back porch together. He went to where his clothing lay and moved his body so that he couldn’t see her as he called forth the change that would turn him back into a man.
He quickly pulled his clothes on and when he turned around she was just pulling her shirt down and he glimpsed the smooth skin on her belly. It was a tantalizing sight but now was not the time to think about acting on it.
She shivered as the wind picked up and he went toward her, putting his arm around her shoulder.
“It’s cold out here, let’s get into the house.”
She nodded and he tucked her close to his side as they walked back into the house. He turned her so that he could put his arms around her and hold her close in a way that he’d been unable to when he was a wolf.
“Thank you.” Her voice was soft and she pulled back from him so that she could look up at him. It would be so easy to bend his head, to kiss her to blot out the pain lurking in her eyes. But that would lead him to try to comfort her in a more intimate way. While that might comfort her now, it would do untold damage in the future when it was time for them to go their separate ways. So he took a step back and his arms fell away from her.
“You’re welcome.” And he let her turn away to go up the stairs to her room without him.
8
It was a few days after Luke had told Honor the outcome of the investigation and Honor was just starting her shift at Sawyer’s. It was early, only lunchtime, and while there were a few people here it wasn’t that busy. She hoped that would change since she needed the distraction that work provided. Her thoughts were not consumed by her brother Quinn, as she would have suspected, but with Rafe.
When they’d gone for the run in the woods, and when he’d held her after, she’d felt so close to him. That feeling of closeness was giving her ideas. Would it be so bad if they made their mating a true one? She wanted Rafe but had no clue how she would go about seducing him. Dealing with a man like him was so far out of her realm of experience. And she didn’t want to make a move on him only to be rejected.
“Earth to Honor.”
Honor jumped and turned her head to look at Alex. “I’m sorry. What were you saying?”
“Your order is up. Are you okay?” There was concern in Alex’s eyes as he looked at her. She’d been out of sorts since she’d gotten here. She didn’t feel sick, but she didn’t feel like herself either.
“Yeah, I’m fine.” She walked to the pass-through, to get the food order that was waiting for her.
“Are you sure? You
look a little pale.”
“I’m a redhead, I always look pale.” She pushed a smile across her lips as she picked up the two plates of food. Her smile faltered for a second as a dull ache bloomed in her stomach. It wasn’t exactly painful, it was just a hot, heavy feeling in the pit of her belly. Maybe she was coming down with something.
She turned and went to deliver her order. She got to Grace and Faith’s table, and put their food in front of them. She’d had the chance to get to know both women a little, and she liked them. It was a little weird interacting with Faith since Honor didn’t know many humans who knew that werewolves existed.
“Is there anything else I can get you?” Sweat broke out on Honor’s forehead and she hoped she wasn’t getting a fever. The last thing she wanted was to be sick.
“Are you okay?” Faith looked at her, and there was concern on her face. God, she must look like shit if everyone was asking her if she was okay. Now that she thought about it, she felt a little shaky on her feet.
“You’re the second person to ask me that, and to be honest I don’t know what is going on. I certainly don’t feel like myself.” She wasn’t sure what was wrong with her since she’d never felt this strange before. She didn’t feel sick, she just felt odd.
“Sit down for a minute and catch your breath.” Graced moved over in the booth to make a space for her. Honor looked at it, and really wanted to take her up on it but she couldn’t.
“I’m working right now, I can’t sit.”
“Logan won’t care about that if you aren’t feeling well.” Faith looked at her and motioned to the empty seat. “Just sit for a few minutes, to see if you feel better.”
Honor slid into the booth but sitting down didn’t help. “I’m not sick, at least I don’t think I am. I just feel really strange.”
Grace looked at her and a speculative look crossed her face. “You’re living in the same house as Rafe, right?”
“Of course I am, he is my mate.” She didn’t know how much Grace and Faith knew about her situation with Rafe, and she didn’t want to broadcast that her mating with Rafe was in name only. The only way she would be able to keep her place under Cold Bay’s protection was if everyone believed that she and Rafe were truly mated.