by Hannah Jay
Step 5: DETAILS
LINENS
Hand towels, bath towels, sheets, and pillow cases are more than necessities for a mistress. She can turn them into little luxuries because believe it or not, clients notice things like this.
Go for the luxe hotel/spa look with all white. Avoid patterns and the appliqué so many towels are festooned with. A simple, clean, plush, terry cloth towel is a terrific luxury for a man showering before or after his pleasure. White has the advantage that it is easy to launder and a little bleach take care of most everything. Don’t try to make your towels last forever. Replace often.
Of course a mistress’s linens need to be fresh, clean, and crisp. And spotless. Treat yourself and your patron to cotton, linen, or bamboo for a really luxurious feel. (For more information on what to look forsee:http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/02/25/sheets-best-buying-guide_n_1302797.html
Once you have purchased the best sheets you can afford, learn how to take care of them properly. And since you will buy new, watch for the sales. Yes, that means owning several sets and doing a lot of laundry. Nature of the business, I’m afraid.
FLOWERS
Fresh flowers are a lovely and fragrant finishing touch to any space. Avoid floristy bouquets---a bunch of bright tulips in a simple vase is much nicer.
Three places for flowers: on your hall table where; on your coffee table as a bright accent; and beside your bed. And a stem or two in the bathroom is unexpected and lovely.
Change out your flowers at the first sign of wilting. Yes, it does cost money, but it’s worth it. Never, ever try to skrimp and save by buying fake ones. Honestly, none is better than these. Ah, so now you have become a woman with a stylish apartment who can be seen carrying home flowers. Tres chic!
MUSIC
For a mistress, music is in the background, not center stage. It helps to set the mood, and that mood is almost never enhanced by Death Metal or Hip Hop, the twang of country, or corny show-tunes. Stick to cool jazz, classical, even some new agey music is inoffensive. Program your music before your date. Most cable companies have music services included.
CANDLES
Only in the evening, or at least at dusk. There is not a woman alive whose beauty is not enhanced by candlelight. But since you will not be attending to them during the course of the evening, avoid tapers and choose unscented tea lights – or better still—votive candles instead. For drama, a couple of dozen are stunning, but every living space can benefit from even a few, strategically placed. The very best candles are made of natural beeswax and they fill the air with a divine aroma.
In the end, a mistress’s space is part of what she brings to her patron. When her patron arrives in her home for the first time he is looking forward to her intimate favours. By thoughtfully creating a pleasing and serene environment, a mistress adds another element to the encounter by engaging even more of her client’s attention. Before he even gets to the bedroom, he has caught a glimpse of the beauty which surrounds her.
Chapter 9 | Ten Things a Modern Mistress Can’t Live Without
What do you really, really need as a mistress? Sure, a great haircut, perfect grooming and a brilliant attitude all help. A pleasing apartement. But let’s get right to the key stuff.
1. A SmartPhone
There is no single invention ever which is as useful to a mistress as a smart phone. Whether you have an iPhone or an Android device, the convenience of having a handheld computer with you wherever you go is critical for success.
Need to tease your patron? Take a quick selfie in a pretty bra and text it to him. Change a time? Text.
From booking to banking, your smart phone can do it all. Plus, it is a flashlight and it can give you directions to your out-call locations. And, of course, as you are waiting for a date, you can play Angry Birds.
As importantly, a smart phone makes texting and other forms of instant messaging a breeze. While you can check your email on a smart phone, text, send those mildly erotic pictures, send your patron shopping suggestions and spur of the moment sweetness. Plus, with a little Bluetooth speaker, you can bring your own music to your encounters with a playlist or just by finding the right internet radio station. A bit of smooth jazz or Sade’s greatest hits can add to the mood.
Of course, if you are a more traditional sort of girl, you can use your smart phone to make and receive phone calls. Low tech, but if you have a nice voice your patron will be delighted.
2. A Little Black Dress
Well, ideally several little black dresses. There is really nothing so versatile whether you are entertaining at home or off for a luxurious dinner before a night cap in your patron’s hotel suite. The LBD can be deliciously demure or dangerously decadent. It can reveal or conceal, but it always adds style to any occasion.
The trick with a little black dress is to look for dresses which are as simple as possible. Even if they are impossibly short or cut incredibly tightly, the fabric should be almost entirely without ornamentation. Perhaps buttons or a bit of stitching on the neckline. The little black dress is all about accentuating your natural beauty. If you have a great figure, a silky knit can cling to every curve. A lovely neck and arms can be set off with a sleeveless or spaghetti strapped little number.
Entertaining at home, you might opt for a fuller, longer skirt and a daring décolletage. However, if you are meeting your date in a bar or restaurant, the plunging neckline may be a bit over the top. Chic girls know that it is never clever to show too much or, worse, be uncomfortable trying to preserve a modicum of modesty in a public place.
The great thing about little black dresses is that they never date. Which means you can often find something brilliant from 1952 in a vintage shop for a tenth of what you will pay for a similar dress at Nordstrom’s. Fabulous shoes, a bright swing coat and a single strand of pearls – tell one of your patrons his mission is to find you a really nice set – and you are dressed for the evening. Of course you’ll need….
3. Stockings
I do go on about stockings and there is a reason: a woman in a pair of stockings, especially sheer, wispy black stockings, most desirably with a seam, looks finished; beautifully turned out; in a word–impeccable.
Of course I know that girls under the age of thirty have often never worn pantyhose, much less stockings. The delights of a bare, suntanned leg have their attractions but mistresses are in the business of creating a pleasing alternative to the ordinary. Stockings are drop-dead extraordinary! Need convincing or inspiration? Check out http://www.laperla.com/
Pretty stockings and a gorgeous but functional garter belt, serve a whole set of functions. For some men, especially those wonderful older, wealthy men, stockings are a depiction of an elegant era, a haunting nostalgia. For others, they are simply a little, delightful, surprise.
There are a few tricks to stockings. Buy more than one pair in the same exact colour. Stockings are very delicate. They will run easily, so if you have a few pairs in the same colour, you can swap the runned one out. To prevent runs, make sure your hands and nails are very smooth when you slip them up your legs. If your hands are a bit rough, a pair of lingerie gloves or other gloves can save you.
Men love to see a glimpse of thigh above your stockings tops; but that should be something you decide to offer, rather than a consequence of sitting down. So, yes, you do need to wear a slightly longer skirt or dress to keep everything concealed until the moment when you flirtily flash a glimpse.
Stockings should not be worn with open-toed shoes. A high-heeled pump is the ticket. Seams, if you are lucky enough to have seamed stockings, should always be straight. Something which can be achieved by fastening the rear garter tab directly above the seam.
Always give yourself an extra five minutes to get the garter belt and stockings on just right. Contrary to the ads, run the garter straps under the panty so that the panties can come off without a great deal of untangling.
4. Candles
Having a few candles is a wonderful way
to set the mood. Half a dozen beeswax tapers or, for out-calls, beeswax votive candles create the flattering candle light which can really enhance your encounter.
Avoid scented candles. Even the nicer ones will leave their scent on your gentleman’s clothing and that, I fear, is a bit of a tip off that he may have been somewhere he shouldn’t. Plus, in general, men are not particularly enamored of the sorts of scents candles typically have. And, there is no pleasing everyone. Beeswax, on the other hand, has a delightful natural scent all its own.
The lovely thing about having a few candles in your bag is that you can take a few minutes to place and light them if you are not entertaining at home. Of course, at home, lighting the candles can be a wonderful way of making the transition to more adult activities. And, it is a touch that shows you care about making the encounter as lovely as possible.
5. A Riding Crop
Even men who are not in the least bit submissive sometimes enjoy a girl with a crop. Nothing elaborate. Just a fifteen-inch black crop, ideally with a leather striker.
Should your date be in need of a little correction, well, you know what to do. Bear in mind that a riding crop makes quite a lot of noise when applied with a bit of vigor. Not ideal for hotels with paper thin walls.
As instruments of correction go, riding crops are mainly for show rather than the infliction of any real pain. But when it becomes apparent that your patron might want to explore his submissive side, having a crop handy makes it easy.
6. Your Favorite Vibe
An hour, much less two hours, can be a very long time. While there are dates where the time just flies by, there are others where your patron is, for whatever reason, somehow not getting into the spirit of the thing. Once you’ve tried the fun of a strip tease and more than a little oral and hand attention, if your patron is still not caught up in the delights of the moment, it may be time to provide a little show.
A discrete, seven inch vibrator fits neatly in your bag and, as you probably already know, can provide hours of fun. But here, it just has to provide a few minutes of erotic distraction. Where a toy show is usually a special request, taking time to warm up with your vibe as your client sits or lies watching, takes a lot of pressure off your client while providing him with a great deal of visual stimulation.
Men are wonderfully visual creatures – thank heavens – and watching a girl and her vibrator is remarkably horny making. But take your time. There are many places where a vibrator can create pleasant sensations and they are all places where your client wants to look. Remember to tease.
Don’t forget that a vibrator also can give a gentleman goose bumps if applied with a degree of firmness and skill.
The point is that having a vibe in your bag means you have the option of bringing it into play. If it is at home on your bedside table and you are in a hotel room, that option is extinguished. So, never leave home without it.
7. Perfect Red Lipstick
There is nothing more classic, or more provocative than scarlet lips. It evokes old Hollywood glamour, pinups, and is even backed up by science (yes, studies prove that men really do love it). Finding your perfect shade is a matter of matching it with your skin tone. If you are new to berry lips, start with sheer. Then work up to something bold and rich. Keep your other makeup simple: crisp black liner, black mascara, and a whisper of blush does the trick. Oh, and don’t forget to smile–red lipstick makes teeth look whiter.
8. Great Towels and Sheets
Your patron comes to your apartment. He is paying a good dollar for the pleasure of your company. But he is also paying for an overall experience–which includes the whole environment. Sadly, mistresses sometimes forget this and simply miss the fact a visit to a man’s mistress should be a wonderful, luxurious, experience. So consider and create an ambience.
Now, the reality is that you may not have a swanky apartment or designer furniture, but if you combine clean with tidy, most men will not even notice a slightly sub-par sofa. Fresh flowers are not expensive and give any room an instant facelift. A bowl of lemons in the spring, pine cones in the winter, are touches that make a statement. Details matter.
What you guest will notice are worn sheets and threadbare towels For not very much money, you can get great towels. Stick to white because when you wash them you can put a little bleach in and they will come out like new. Fabric softener is option as well. For extra fun, run your towels through your dryer ten minutes before your date is scheduled so they are lovely and warm when he has his shower.
Good sheets can be expensive but, if you shop the sales, you can get good sheets at a steep discount. Again, white has the huge advantage of being bleachable. Yes, you can get 500 thread count sheets but the fact is most patron will not really know the difference if you get good, 200 thread count sheets. But, and it is a critical thing, spend the little extra and get pure cotton.
9. Little Black Slip
Under a little black dress, goes a little black slip. Or chemise as their shorter, more risqué cousins are called.
Yes, another piece of lingerie which girls stopped wearing, foolishly, a couple of decades ago. There are a lot of reasons why slips make tremendous sense for any woman wearing a dress or a skirt; but for a mistress, they can be absolutely essential.
What a slip offers is an additional layer between the world and you naked. This means that, as things move from the conversational, you are able to take off your dress but still leave your charms unrevealed. In the gentle world of teasing and pleasing, another layer adds to the excitement. Plus, if you are a little shy, you can easily leave your slip on throughout your encounter.
Slips themselves come in all manner of fabrics and styles. From a very simple unornamented wisp of black to lacy confections with fitted bodices and spaghetti straps. Your best bet for finding nice slips are thrift stores and vintage clothing shops. They are not expensive and owning lots is fun.
If you are handy with a needle, a tuck or two can make a loose slip a bodycon delight but just a bit harder to get on and off.
Of course, slips of a very superior sort are still made in glorious silks and satins. If you enjoy coveting, check out PatriciaFieldwalker.com. A really beautiful silk slip is the perfect Christmas gift for a gentleman to give a lady, and there is no reason why your patron should not know what you love and covet. Gorgeous slips are available from Amazon in silk and all manner of other delicious fabrics.
10. Refreshment
An encounter with a mistress is an essentially social activity. So is eating, and so is having a glass of wine. A mistress entertaining should consider having a little plate of something and a nice glass of wine to go with it.
Wine is very much an option as well as a matter of choice and taste, but here are a few, reasonably priced, suggestions.
Something bubbly.
A mistress should always have a bottle of something sparkling in her refrigerator–it’s a staple. There is something wonderfully decadently about bubbles, and the flute it is served in. However, you need not spurge on real champagne (let’s hope he does, though) to get the taste and the effect.
An Afternoon White
A Chablis, Sancere, Albarino, or Reisling will always be a top pour. And a bit off the beaten track; which shows just how worldly and fascinating you are.
An Afternoon Rose
Walk directly to the French section of the wine shop and pick something from Provence in a pale hue. Winner.
An Evening White
A weightier white with perhaps a touch of oak. Think Chenin Blanc, Chardonnay, Viogner.
An Evening Red
A Pinot Noir always hits the mark as does Cru Beaujolais.
Cocktail Hour
For the girl serious about style and savvy about libations, invest in a chic bar cart on wheels. It makes a striking addition to your décor (especially if it is a unique, vintage piece like an Art Deco glass and chrome design. Ebay is a great resource for such finds.) As far as stock, start with a few staples that you like
, and add more over time. Begin with something oh- so chic and beguiling like St. Germain, a French elderflower liqueur. (See: http://stgermain.fr/)
A little plate of something, for me, means a bit of smoked salmon, capers and toasts. Also failsafe: a pleasing piece of cheese and some bread. Nothing fancy, (but real cheese please; not Kraft) and nothing too much. He is really not there for the food, but the fact you offer some, gives you a chance to sit down and actually chat with your patron.
Of course, a little food and a little wine are soon finished and that is a lovely moment to move the date forward. But, by pacing your own eating and drinking, you can fill a bit of time and establish a degree of connection with your gentleman caller.
Just the Essentials
LBD, stockings, killer red lipstick, riding crop and great sheets plus a few other items and you are good to go. The old saying, “the more you know, the less you need” is especially true for mistresses. Don’t load yourself down with outfits which don’t work or make up which does not flatter.
If you stick to essentials your patron will notice how fabulous you are. He’ll be back for more.