"I don't remember much. It was just a feeling."
"A feeling?"
"Everything was dark, and I just had to force myself to fight through it, and then when I did, I woke up here."
"Holy shit." Olivia looked up at the television attached to the wall. "Electricity, how I've missed you. She bowed down to it."
"Is that Corey?" Dana asked. The TV showed a news bulletin, and a breaking news banner flashed along the screen. Corey's face flashed up on screen like a ghost. It was him at some award ceremony. There was no sound coming from the TV, but the subtitles said that he had killed himself. Hung in a closet at his rehab clinic. "Shit." Olivia stared, transfixed, until everything became a blur.
"Are you okay?" Dana asked.
"I don't feel right."
***
As she awoke, disorientated, Olivia was being carted to her room.
"We've been looking for you," said the doctor. "All your test results have come back. Nothing to worry about. You haven't done any long-term damage."
"Do you know why I passed out? I mean, I have a habit of it anyway, but..."
"You're pregnant."
"That's impossible," she blurted, dumbfounded.
"A false positive is extremely rare, but you can always get a second opinion."
"I need to be alone." She felt as if she would be sick and tried to control her ragged breathing.
***
Despite the non-stop thoughts churning through her mind, Olivia managed to fall asleep quickly and didn't awake until the next morning. Her body craved unconsciousness. After a solid nine hours of sleep, she was discharged. She went to the smoking area to make a call before going back to see Michael. Her fingers danced over the cellphone screen like it was the most natural thing in the world. Muscle memory. She put in the country code, and then her mother's number.
"Hey."
"Olivia, is that you? You're cracking up."
"Yes, it's me."
"Are you enjoying your trip?"
"Yeah. Looking forward to going home though."
"Well that makes a change."
"It's so good to hear your voice."
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I'm good."
"Listen, it's nice to speak to you, but your dad's in the process of burning the house down again." The fire alarm started blaring in the background.
"Later mum," she shouted before hanging up.
Olivia ran back to Michael's room and burst through the door. "I've got some stuff to tell you."
"Go on."
"Dana is alive. She's here, and Corey died. We saw it on the news."
"I know. She came to visit. She told me about Corey. She told me you passed out. I was worried."
"I'm fine. Just the stress of finding out Corey was dead. You know me. I'm always fainting. I faint so much I could probably do with a fainting couch in my place."
"I wonder why he died, but we didn't?"
"Michael. There's something I have to go do. I promise I will come back and see you as soon as I can, though."
"Of course. Whatever you need." He looked concerned but did not probe any further.
"I have to go back to the bridge and see if Luke is there. If he would be anywhere, it would be there."
"Just look after yourself."
"You're the best." Olivia gave him a kiss, grabbed her bag and headed for the door.
MEANS TO AN END
The drive seemed to take forever, and all the bridges looked so similar. She was so used to driving with no other moving cars on the road that it came as a shock, having to abide by the laws of the road, resisting the urge to speed. Suddenly everything started to look very familiar, and she pulled over onto the side of the road with a screech, kicking up dust. As she walked up the embankment, she hoped no police noticed her abandoned car. The ranger had been kind enough to arrange for the car to be towed to the hospital for her when she went in the ambulance.
***
When Olivia got to the top of the bridge, Luke was already there, standing right at the edge. No other drivers had noticed him, or if they had, they didn't stop.
"Luke." She spoke softly, not wanting to startle him.
He put his hand out. "Don't come any closer."
"What are you doing?"
"What do you think I'm doing?"
"I don't know. Something stupid, probably."
"I'm at the point of no return Olivia."
"Why. Tell me exactly why you're doing this."
"I don't owe you an explanation. Besides, what's responsible for your complete 180."
"Look. You can kill yourself at any time. Why now? If you need help, I'm here." She edged closer.
"You know how it is. You have to act when you have the resolve."
Olivia struggled to find the words. The exact words in the perfect order. The words that could change his mind.
"I thought you were like me. I thought you were the real deal." He looked over to see cars hurtling below. "But you're just like the rest of them."
"I don't understand."
"We're just animals, you know. Stupid animals. We're just wandering through this world, acting on our instincts, no better than any other species. Why the hell do we think we're so fucking special anyway? We're pathetic."
"I agree." She got even closer. "Humans suck. Well, most of us. But the few that don't suck, I just want to help them get through this mess. At least for as long as I feel I can."
"And that's your prerogative." He stepped up onto the concrete parapet.
"Come on, Luke. Let's talk about this somewhere safe."
"You've got some nerve. Acting all holier than thou. Now that you've changed your mind, everyone else has to."
"That is not my intention."
"Is it because you're pregnant? You think that makes you important or something?"
"No, I don't think it makes me important. It just sort of happened."
"You want to know why I'm doing this. I might as well tell you."
"Tell me."
"You want to know why I dropped out of med school? Why I'm such a piece of shit."
"Why are you doing this? Just tell me. I'm sure it's not as bad as you're making it in your head."
"You know I said I was a virgin."
"Yeah."
"Well, I'm not. I lied. I had sex with this girl at medical school. I really liked her, maybe a little too much."
"Okay." She inched a little closer.
"We were both crazy drunk. It was one of those parties where everyone is out of it. Myself included."
Olivia got that feeling. The one where she didn't want to hear anymore. She wondered if she could tell him to stop talking before it was too late.
"She reported me to the dean. I was finished there."
"What did you do to her?"
"I don't remember. Like I told you, I was wasted." He glanced back and then looked down at the road again.
Olivia didn't know what to say but endeavoured to keep him talking. "Whatever happened has happened. All you can control is what you do now. Remember when you saved me from that crazy doctor? Or when you held them off when they came for us at the hotel. You were the last one there. You basically died for us."
"What's going on?" A car stopped behind them, and a woman got out.
"Nothing, can you stay back? It's a delicate situation." Olivia turned her back on Luke and the woman's face dropped. A look of shock that Olivia would never forget. The lady screamed and ran to the side of the bridge. Luke had disappeared off the side, and she could not bring herself to look over the edge.
The sound of commotion broke out down below. Horns blaring, car doors opening and people screaming. Olivia started to run as her body worked on pure instinct, the overwhelming urge to get away.
"Hey, where are you going?" The woman called after her.
She practically slid down the embankment and once she got to her car, she shut herself inside, gasping for breath. Without even looking at what was g
oing on, she knew he was dead. She could feel it. In her peripheral vision she could see the blood, and that was enough. Bile rose up her esophagus, burning on the way out, as she doubled over and vomited all over the upholstery of the seat next to her. As the nausea subsided, she drove away before anyone could stop her and start asking questions. One lane was still open, and she just concentrated on the road ahead. If she didn't look, then it didn't happen.
THE END OF THE BEGINNING
1 year later- England
A hotel worker arrived with a silver tray of champagne, and Zoe was the first person to take a flute.
Dana took a glass and held it up in the air. "To Olivia. Soon to be Mrs Olivia Weston."
"Thank you. I'm so glad you two could make it." They sat outside. The weather was surprisingly beautiful. An Indian summer with no rain in sight.
"I still can't get over your dress. It's stunning." Zoe took a sip of champagne.
"What this old thing."
"You got it so cheap too."
"I don't need anything expensive. The venue cost an arm and a leg. I even made the cake myself."
"You didn't?"
"It was easy. I love baking. Wanted to save some money. It was a no brainer."
"Well, everything looks amazing. You must be so excited."
"I really am. Not looking forward to saying my vows in front of loads of people, though. I hope I don't embarrass myself."
"You should pretend it's just the two of you talking to each other. Block everything else out."
"I still can't believe I let my mum talk me into having a priest. I'm not even religious."
"I saw him arrive a few minutes ago. He's kinda hot for his age," said Zoe.
"Zoe, there is no way you are banging my priest."
"Spoil sport."
"Anyway, I better slow down on the champagne. Don't want to be shit-faced when I say my vows. Although it might give me a bit of Dutch courage."
"You'll be fine." Dana got up from her chair. "I'm going to get Alison. You can say hi before you walk down the aisle."
"See you in a sec."
Zoe pulled her chair closer to Olivia. "How are you? I haven't really had a chance to speak to you since the adoption. You've been so busy planning this wedding."
"Honestly. It just felt right. When I saw Dana with Alison, I knew she would do anything for her." Olivia took a large gulp from her glass. "The thing that made me laugh was how Michael's parents came crawling back, wanting to be part of his life once they found out a baby was involved. They cut all ties with their only son years ago, yet are now obsessed with their supposed grandchild. I bet they'd lose interest once she grew up. Once she started having thoughts and opinions of her own. I know this sounds messed up, but I took great pleasure in telling them that she was being adopted by Dana. I know I'm petty."
"Dana is so good with her. You did a good thing."
"Sorry I've been so busy planning and getting ready, I forgot to ask how you are."
"Great thanks. Those first few months were tough. Getting over Corey. I've been trying to get out of my shell recently. I booked an around the world flight a few days ago. I'm freaking out a bit but can't wait."
"Good for you. I want to see so many photo's."
"It's time." Olivia's father approached the table. "You ready?"
"Ready as I'll ever be."
"Zoe, you better go find a seat. Where did Dana go anyway?"
"I'm here." Dana rushed with Alison in her arms.
"I need to do this before I go down the aisle." Olivia passed everyone a glass. "I want to toast to Corey and Luke. We miss them like crazy, but us of all people can appreciate why they decided not to come back."
Zoe interjected. "Did you see that interview with Corey's parents' after he died? All they seemed to care about was his career and how his suicide reflected on them."
"Yeah, they really annoyed me, I had to turn it off," said Dana.
"So come on guys, what do you think actually happened to us? Was it heaven, hell, purgatory, a dream, a hallucination?" Zoe asked, adjusting her teal dress.
"I know what it was," said Dana. "It was a test. We were given a choice. A second chance. We chose to take it. I think we deserve to toast ourselves."
Olivia's parents came back to the table. "Come on! You're keeping everyone waiting."
"Sorry." Olivia got up and straightened her dress. "Do I look okay."
"You look beautiful. Now go get married." Zoe followed her over to where the ceremony was set up and split off to go and sit down.
***
Michael was waiting for her at the front of the aisle, and as she arrived the music started. The sun was shining, and the garden was decorated all over with flowers. Her hands started sweating as the sun beat down and she realised all eyes were on her. She concentrated on Michael in his dark, tailored suit. There was something about suits that really did it for her. She couldn't wait to get him back to the hotel room and imagined pulling him into the room by his lapels, slowly undoing his tie and loosening his belt. As she looked up, the priest locked eyes with her, bringing her back to the moment, and she decided to get her mind out of the gutter.
When she stood in front of Michael, he had a sparkle in his eyes and a grin on his face that made her wonder if he could read her mind. He was so going to get it at the first chance she could find. Stood in front of the makeshift alter, everything went quiet as everyone waited for the priest to start speaking. Her mother had talked her into the classic wedding, as per every romantic film she had seen. Catching the bouquet, white dress, we are gathered here today, ect, ect.
"You weren't supposed to bring anything back," the priest said. His voice was quiet enough that the guests would not hear.
"Sorry, what did you say?" Olivia asked.
"You were never meant to get pregnant. You can't bring someone back from the other side," he said in a low, matter-of-fact voice.
"What are you talking about?" Something shifted in the corner of her eye, and she turned her head. Dana and Zoe waved from their seats, but that was not what had caught her attention.
"It has come to take Alison back where she belongs." The priest's face was blank, as if there were no emotion whatsoever behind his words.
"Shut up. Just shut up." Olivia shouted, not wanting to acknowledge what he was saying.
The mist appeared in the distance, creeping towards them. She closed her eyes and opened them again, willing it away. When she opened her eyes again it was still there, closer than before and creeping past the hedges. She looked up and she knew Michael had seen it too.
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