“No attorneys,” Mark said, and she felt the breath she’d held leave her.
“It’s about doctors and hospitals,” he said instead as he stood up.
“Oh.” That was its own set of problems. She looked over to make sure Jeremy wasn’t sneaking out into the hallway. He wasn’t. She turned back to Mark. “We might as well go into the kitchen. You can eat while we talk.”
The light felt subdued when Hannah stepped back into the kitchen. The bulb had a yellow cast to it and the whole room looked older than it did in the daytime. She supposed her father had forgotten to buy the regular bulbs and used one they kept for the barn. She had scrubbed and mopped the tile floor after Mrs. Hargrove left, though, so that looked adequate, at least.
“I’ve tried to keep all the places clean where Jeremy and I live,” she said to Mark. She was aware that if she didn’t it would be points against her in a custody battle. “I can’t always afford the best apartments around, but I make sure they’re neat. Jeremy is past the stage of crawling, but I use disinfectant on all the floors where I can. And I clean the carpets.”
She sat down at the table, opposite where she’d laid the dishes out for Mark.
“You work too hard,” Mark said as he slid into the other chair.
For the first time, she noticed the red color on his face. She supposed the shadows had hid it until now. “You weren’t sunburned when you came in at noon.”
“I know,” he said. “The sun came on strong about two o’clock. And the chaff didn’t help. Some of this is windburn.”
“My father should have some salve for that,” Hannah said as she started to rise. “It’ll be in the medicine cabinet.”
“The burn doesn’t hurt,” Mark said. “I’d rather eat first, if that’s okay. I do want to talk.”
She sat back down.
Mark looked at her for a moment and then held out his hand. “Would you mind praying with me before I eat?”
She reluctantly took his hand. She could hardly refuse to pray with someone, but she worried it might take the edge off her resistance. And she sensed there was more to come in this conversation. Still, when Mark bowed his head, she did as well.
“Father,” Mark prayed. “We are grateful for all Your provisions for us today and we ask Your guidance as we go forward into tomorrow. We ask that You protect Hannah’s father throughout the night and be with our son. We ask these things in Jesus’s name. Amen.”
“Amen,” Hannah said and opened her eyes.
She was relieved to see that Mark was looking down at his soup.
“This smells good,” he said with a smile as he reached for his spoon.
He ate with relish and Hannah relaxed. “My father doesn’t keep much in the house for food, but Lois said she’d arrange for me to get some groceries tomorrow.”
“Nothing wrong with a bowl of vegetable soup,” Mark said as he scooped up the last bite. He’d already eaten the sandwich. “I’ll bring some fresh fruit over from our house when I come in the morning. Jeremy could use some oranges.”
Hannah wrapped her arms around herself. She knew what was coming.
“Is there anything else he needs to be eating to get well?” Mark asked. “Milk? Eggs? Just let me know and I’ll get it.”
Hannah shook her head, blinking away her tears.
“It’s not about food,” she said. “He’s a precious boy. He worries about other people—”
“He sure was concerned about me,” Mark said with a grin. “I’ve never had anybody check my eyeballs before. Not even in the hospital nursing home. I’m wondering what is wrong with him.”
Hannah smiled back even though she could feel the tears starting to fall down her cheeks. “I don’t know how it happened, but the doctor says Jeremy has leukemia.”
Mark went still. The grin dropped from his face.
Everything was silent.
“Did you say leukemia?” Mark finally asked.
Hannah nodded. “Some kind of a cancer. Not very many kids get this kind—six thousand a year around the country—and it took some time for our doctor at the time to find it. This was when we lived up next to Canada on the Hi-Line. At first, the doctor thought it was some kind of flu. But Jeremy just got weaker and weaker. Finally the doctor did enough tests to find it. He suggested I take him to a specialist in Billings.”
She stopped, but Mark didn’t say anything. He was looking at her intently, waiting for her to finish.
“We went just the once. It was the specialist who found not only the leukemia, but also a tumor in the bone of his leg.” Hannah stopped to reach in her pocket, searching for a tissue. She wiped away her tears. Then she started to hiccup. She didn’t know why, but every time she started to cry she ended up with the hiccups.
“Let me get you a glass of water,” Mark said as he stood up and walked over to the counter. He reached up into the cupboard and brought down a glass, then filled it at the faucet.
When he brought it back to the table, he set it down. “Here you go.”
By this time, the hiccups were so deep that they were painful. Hannah reached for the water and had a hard time bringing the glass to her lips. She couldn’t control the tears any longer.
Mark reached out and steadied the glass as she drank. The cool water soothed her throat. She finished the glass and Mark held it. Then she laid her face down on the top of the table. She heard the sound of Mark setting the glass down and then felt his hands start rubbing circles on the middle of her back. He used to do that when they were kids and she got her hiccup attacks. There was nothing that helped to ease them better.
She looked up and he enveloped her in a gentle hug.
They stayed like that for five or so minutes. By then the hiccups were completely gone. She wasn’t inclined to move, though. Her emotions were spent. She hadn’t told anyone else about the leukemia, and she realized it had been hard for her to carry it alone inside her. She didn’t want Jeremy to have people worried about him, though. He was a sensitive child and he’d know something was very wrong if that happened.
She felt Mark kiss the top of her head.
“You haven’t told Jeremy, have you?” Mark asked softly. He was so close, his hand was still on her back and his face was only inches away.
Hannah shook her head. “I figured we should go to our meeting with the doctor on Wednesday before I say anything. I won’t be able to answer Jeremy’s questions until then anyway.”
“The doctor in Billings?”
“Yes,” she answered. “They have a children’s cancer center there and they do experimental treatments. The leukemia is a kind that they can treat, but the tumor in the leg is something else. It’s unusual. I read about a stem cell treatment that can be done to help with the leukemia and the tumor, but I’m not sure if our insurance will cover it. The procedure hasn’t been approved for regular treatment yet, but this cancer center has done it many times.”
“I’d like to go to the doctor with you,” Mark said.
Hannah lifted her head. She hadn’t thought this through. “I don’t know.”
“I’m his father,” Mark said. “Maybe I could be a donor or something for this stem cell treatment—if that’s what he needs.”
“I don’t know that much about it yet,” Hannah said. Their doctor had it in his charts, but she realized she didn’t know Jeremy’s blood type. Of course, that likely wouldn’t affect stem cells anyway.
“We’ll figure it out together,” Mark said. “You’ve got tomorrow to think about it. Today’s Monday.”
Hannah nodded. She’d be able to make a better decision after she had some rest. She wished she could foresee how long Mark would be willing to be involved with Jeremy if their son was sick.
“You know Jeremy might not be able to walk very well,” she cautioned him. She looked for any reaction.
M
ark paused. “I hope it doesn’t come to that for him.”
Hannah tried to decipher that response and she couldn’t. He didn’t look like he was thinking of distancing himself from Jeremy, but she didn’t know yet. “We’ll talk more tomorrow.”
Mark stood at that point. “You’re tired.”
She nodded. “Totally beat.”
“I’ll see you in the morning, then,” he said. “That’s if I get here before the rest of you leave for Dry Creek.”
“Sounds good,” she said.
“Oh, and I want to fix the door on the small house after I finish the combining,” Mark said. “I might do some painting, too. Before you go in the morning, put your stuff someplace where I won’t get anything on it.”
“Almost everything is still in the car,” she said as she stood, as well. “Do whatever you want in the house. You can’t hurt anything.”
Mark nodded and started walking toward the living room.
“I’ll let myself out,” he said. “Lock the door behind me.”
Hannah watched him leave. Part of her wanted to go with him, even though he was only going over to his family’s ranch. She had not felt so alive in the past four years except—she paused and remembered. It was different, but she’d loved Jeremy, and her days with him were some of the most precious she’d had in her life. She could not afford to be distracted by Mark, not when she had Jeremy to worry about. She was glad she’d told Mark how sick their son was, but she was the one who was ultimately responsible. She was the mother and Jeremy didn’t even know he had a father.
Hannah sighed. That was another problem and one she wasn’t ready to face tonight. At some point, she would have to tell Jeremy just who his father was. Even after the cozy scene she’d seen tonight, she wasn’t sure how her son would feel about having a father.
Chapter Six
Mark drove his pickup onto the Stelling ranch a little before six the next morning, Tuesday. It was still dark outside so he couldn’t see enough of the sky to judge whether it would rain or not. What he did know was that he had to finish the combining as soon as he could. He had passed Hannah’s car outside Dry Creek when he was coming this way. Glad to see her, he stopped to roll down his window and say good morning.
Hannah greeted him, but looked distracted and said she needed to get to work. She had her father tucked into the passenger seat and a sleepy Jeremy in the back seat. Even the cat had left the ranch for the day and was curled up on Jeremy’s shoulders. Mark suspected his son was using the cat as a pillow, but the feline didn’t seem to mind.
Mark decided now was not the time to ask Hannah if she had decided whether he could go with her Wednesday when she took their son to the doctor. She had her hair pulled back in a ponytail and her red T-shirt on. Her eyes were not puffy from crying so he figured she was okay. He wished her well and she drove away. Mark could hear a rattle that told him her old car needed a tune-up, though. He’d add that to the list of things he’d do once he finished the harvesting.
“She won’t find me so easy to send away,” Mark said aloud as he squared his shoulders. No one was there to answer him back, but it didn’t diminish his satisfaction. He liked doing things for her and he intended to do them.
He had known when he left his family’s ranch that he’d be too early to go out into the fields, but he’d come over anyway so he’d have time to work on the lock for that small house. He’d rummaged through the tack room in the Nelson barn last night and found a used lock and key combination that he thought would work. They had obviously been taken off some broken-down door decades ago, but locks hadn’t changed much in all that time and, as far as he knew, keys were ageless.
Just knowing some things stayed the same made him feel optimistic about the future. He hadn’t been left behind that much after being in limbo for those four years.
He was whistling as he pulled his pickup to a stop beside the main house and stepped down. Some twenty minutes later, he had the lock on the door and was trying the attached key when he heard a pickup pull into the yard. He stuck his head out and saw Randy Collins walking up to the main house. Randy was the only paid wrangler on the Nelson horse ranch and, since it was Tuesday, he was likely on his way into Miles City for ranch supplies.
“Hey!” Mark called as he stepped out of the house so he could get Randy’s attention. “I’m over here.”
The other man changed course and started walking toward Mark. “I’m glad to see you.”
Mark noticed Randy’s limp was giving him some trouble. A medium-sized man, the cowboy was bow-legged and as plain as they come. His face was clean-shaven, but had a flatness about it that made him look sturdy rather than handsome, especially when he wore his usual Stetson. Randy instinctively knew how to get a horse to do what he wanted, though, and he was loyal to his friends. In short, he was an old-fashioned cowboy.
Mark patiently waited for the other man to get within easy talking distance. There was no sense in them yelling at each other across the empty yard.
“Lois—” Randy managed to say when he arrived. He was breathing hard from hurrying. Mark knew he meant the waitress at the Dry Creek Café since she was the only Lois around. Besides, Randy had had a crush on the woman for over a year now and was, in his mind, subtly courting her.
“She asked if I would get some groceries for Hannah and her boy,” he said once he got his wind back. “I stopped as the café was opening. Hannah gave five dollars to Lois, who gave it to me.”
Mark figured Randy was making it clear that he wasn’t doing the favor for Hannah. The man knew how Mark felt and wouldn’t want to put himself forward with a woman Mark had strong feelings for.
“Hannah said she wanted some kale and popsicles,” Randy continued. “Red and purple. The popsicles, not the kale. And a couple cans of tomato soup.”
“That’s it?” Mark asked incredulously. “That isn’t enough to keep the two of them fed, and then there’s Mr. Stelling, too.” Mark pulled out the wallet he kept in his shirt pocket and handed two twenty-dollar bills to Randy. “Get them a package of hamburger meat and some vegetables. Maybe apples, too,” he added.
Mark wasn’t sure what his son should be eating, but everyone said apples were good for you. “Maybe carrots for vegetables and a few big potatoes for baking.” He paused. “Didn’t Hannah say she wanted anything else? Kale isn’t enough to make a meal.”
“I offered to give her the chiffon pie I’d ordered for today,” Randy said, his broad face pinking at the words. “Lois made a lemon one. That’s her specialty.”
“You ordered the whole pie?” Mark asked and then grinned. He knew it was the entire thing because Randy had been buying as many of Lois’s pies as he could. “Afraid some of the hands from the other ranches will come in and buy a piece?”
Randy shook his head. “I wouldn’t mind if they bought some pie, but they all seem to want to sit around and talk to Lois while they eat it.” He was silent for a minute. “The truth is, I’m getting kind of tired of chiffon pie. I always preferred apple anyway.”
Mark knew that fact from the pies stacked in the refrigerator in the bunkhouse that he and Randy shared. “Wouldn’t it be easier just to tell Lois how you feel?”
“I’m working up to it,” Randy said defensively. “A man can’t just go up and ask a woman to marry him without some...time.”
“Maybe not, but you could ask her out to dinner,” Mark said.
All of the pink had drained from Randy’s face and he looked white. “She might say no.” His voice was low. “She hasn’t said yes to anyone else and she’s been asked. Lots of times. And if she won’t say yes to Jacob Marsh—and him all duded up in that new Western outfit of his—what chance does a man like me have?”
“Well, then, just—” Mark started and stopped himself. He realized he had absolutely no idea what Randy should do. In years past, Mark would have suggested win
ning a rodeo or dazzling a woman with some fancy moves on a dance floor. Back then, he’d outshone Jacob Marsh. Not that Mark ever really wanted anyone but Hannah. Still, he was popular at dances and he’d heard rumors of girls who wanted to date him.
“Just be yourself,” Mark finished.
“That’s what I’m being,” Randy protested. “Steady and slow.”
Mark nodded. He wasn’t sure that was a winning strategy, but he didn’t want to discourage the man. “Well, she’ll like it when you get groceries for Hannah. Did you bring one of the freezer bags?” The grocery store was in Miles City so when they bought ice cream or anything frozen, they needed to zip it in an insulated freezer bag and put it in a cooler with ice so it would arrive in Dry Creek without melting.
“I’ve got one in the pickup,” Randy said with a nod. “For the popsicles.”
“Well, you’re ready, then,” Mark said.
Randy just stood there a minute.
“I just wanted you to know I’m not moving in on your girl,” Randy finally said as he turned to go. “Your Hannah is real nice, but it’s Lois for me.”
“Thank you,” Mark said as he watched his friend walk away. He wondered if Lois even knew what she was missing by not noticing Randy. He was a good, solid man who would treat a wife like a queen. But then, maybe Lois did want someone with more style. For all he knew, she was holding out for a banker. Or a doctor.
Mark marveled that he’d ever thought he’d known anything about romance. He’d never courted Hannah. They’d been such good friends that the other feelings just sort of snuck up on them. He wondered now if that hadn’t been a mistake. Maybe if they’d officially dated they would have something more defined when they did come together.
As he listened to Randy drive his pickup away from the Stelling house, Mark turned and started walking back to the small house where Hannah and Jeremy would be staying now that Mr. Stelling didn’t need to be awakened every few hours. Mark should be getting out to the field, but he intended to wash the one window in the run-down place that wasn’t boarded over.
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