by Amy Sumida
“Tima?” Kirill laid his hand on my head. “Vervain, it vill be all right. Ve'll figure it out.”
I turned and settled in against Kirill, and he wrapped me into a tight embrace. I sobbed against his chest as he held me. There had been times when I had wished for a different life; when I complained about the hardships or the complications of the way I lived. But now, I was terrified that they might be taken away. Because with those traumas had come treasures; people and experiences that were worth any amount of pain or problems.
But crying wasn't going to help.
I sniffed, wiped at my face, and looked up at Kirill. “Arach and I did a blood spell to ensure that our souls recognized each other.”
“You did?” Kirill blinked in surprise and then in revelation. “And ve have already done such a spell.”
“Yeah; our Blood to Heart.” I nodded. “That can't be undone; no matter what happens to time. Faerie told me that time refashioned is different than an original timeline; certain things can't be undone.”
“Even vithout our bond, I know ve vould find each other,” he said with a peaceful smile. “Ve are meant to be, Vervain. Zere is no other future for me zat makes sense. You make my life real; vithout you, zere is no me.”
“I can't live without you either,” I whispered. “So, we had better make sure that we find this time god and...”
“Vervain?”
A cold shiver was creeping over my body and with it came a thick darkness.
“Kirill!” I grasped at him in terror, and his eyes widened.
“I love you, Vervain,” he said urgently. “I love you; hold onto that.”
Kirill pulled me in tightly to his chest, and we gripped each other as if someone were trying to tear us apart. Which is exactly what was happening. Despite the strength of our love and our arms, the dark consumed us, and we were lost to it.
Chapter Six
I sighed and stretched awake; the salt breeze reviving me. Sun streaked in through the open balcony along with the ocean air, but it didn't reach the massive bed that I shared with my husband. I rolled over with a satisfied smile and ran my hand over the expanse of his hard stomach; scrunching my fingers in the sprinkling of hair there. He moaned softly awake, but when my hand wandered lower, he inhaled sharply as his arms tightened around me.
“Good morning,” he rumbled with a sleep-roughened voice.
“Good morning.” I gave him a quick kiss and then continued my kisses down his chiseled jaw.
His hands threaded through my hair as I made my way down his chest—pausing to flick my tongue over his hard nipple—and then over his belly. I settled under the covers—between his thighs—and took him in my mouth; taking care not to nick him with my teeth.
When he was writhing in rapture, I flung back the blankets and straddled him; sliding him into me with a satisfied moan. I began a rapid pace; my hands braced on his massive chest as his went to my breasts. The sun caught the red tones in his pale hair and turned him into a fiery angel. I frowned and blinked; an angel? Where had that come from?
No matter; my passion was rising and with it came my need for other things. I smiled slowly at Thor, and he grinned back before he turned his head and offered me his throat. As my climax took hold of me, I struck; biting into Thor's thick neck. His blood washed over my tongue, and I tasted all that was him; the strength, honor, and love inside him. As I drank, my bite sent Thor into orgasm, and he held my hips tightly to his as he bucked up into me. When the shouting was over, I licked the tiny marks in his throat and then eased off him.
“I couldn't ask for a better way to start my day,” Thor said as he leaned over to kiss me. “How's my lovely Vampire Goddess this morning?”
“You know how much I hate that title,” I grumbled half-heartedly.
Honestly, it wasn't the title that bothered me so much as the way I had received it. I'd had a run-in with an Aztec god named Huitzilopochtli. He was the God of Sun and War, and also the Father of Vampires. I had thought that he had some good in him; that perhaps I could save him. But, in the end, Blue—that's the nickname I'd given him—tried to turn me into his vampire slave. In self-defense, I started draining his magic—a trick I'd only learned weeks before—and ended up taking all of it. Blue had died, and I had become his magic's new host.
Blue's priests attacked me next, but since I held the magic that sustained them, it was a simple matter to subdue them. Unfortunately, they were extremely loyal to Blue, and even under my influence, they were unstable. I finally had to cut them off from the magic entirely; killing them in the process. That had been awful to watch; although they seemed to die painlessly, their bodies withered and then turned to dust. I'd never seen anything like it. The whole thing had been a horrible situation that left me with magic that I would have preferred not to have.
But it did have its perks.
“We are what we are, darling,” Thor said gently as he lowered his face to kiss the lightning-shaped scar on my neck; the scar that covered a bite that Blue had given me. “There should be no shame or regret in that. You did what you had to do, and you survived because of it. I, for one, rejoice in your title because it means that you'll live forever.”
Forever; that had been a problem for us before. I had been human, and I didn't think that a relationship with a god could go anywhere. But then I became a goddess and my protests became moot. Thor proposed shortly after I took Blue's magic, and we were married twice; once for my traditions and once for his. Our first ceremony had been in Hawaii. It had been beautiful; all of my family and friends mingling with gods unknowingly. There had been a few comments about Thor's gorgeous family and friends, but who would possibly jump to the conclusion that they were all Atlanteans who had used their magic to become gods? No one would because that's just ridiculous.
Isn't it funny how ridiculous the truth is?
“Maybe you're right,” I conceded. “It's far better to live with the title than to be killed by the man who last bore the magic.”
“Exactly.” Thor's Caribbean Quartz eyes went soft and a little sad.
“Hades,” I said; knowing exactly where Thor's thoughts had turned; or rather, who they had turned to.
“I think we should visit him today.” Thor nodded.
“It's been years since Persephone was murdered,” I said. “How long do you think he'll mourn her?”
“My father mourned Sabine for centuries,” he said grimly. “I don't doubt that Hades loves Persephone just as strongly.”
“Of course, he does.” I immediately felt horrible. “She was an amazing person, and I'll miss her for as long as I live.”
A soft meow interrupted us as Nick, my gray tabby, jumped up on the bed.
“Hey, baby,” I said as Nick found a spot between Thor and me and started kneading the blankets.
“This cat always comes between us,” Thor said teasingly as he scratched Nick's head. “But I suppose he's better than another man.”
“Why would you say that?” I looked at Thor in surprise.
“I have no idea,” he said with the same amount of surprise. “I'm sorry, darling; I didn't mean anything by it.”
“It's okay,” I said brightly. “I feel kind of strange this morning too.”
“Perhaps we need some breakfast,” Thor suggested.
“First, I need a bath,” I declared before I kissed Nick and then Thor.
I headed toward the bathroom; my gaze wandering out over Asgard as I did. Across the lake from us was Valhalla; the golden shields that adorned its walls were catching the sunlight and magnifying it. I blinked against the glare and a flash of Odin's face filled my mind. I stumbled and caught myself against the door frame.
What the fuck? Odin? Why was I thinking about Odin? As soon as I wondered it, I began to get more images; whole episodes that seemed like memories. It was Odin and me, except I wasn't me—not this me—and Odin wasn't his current self either. For one thing, he had both of his eyes.
“Vervain?” Thor ask
ed with concern.
“I'm fine. It's fine; everything is fine.” I sent a shaky smile over my shoulder before I hurried into the bathroom and closed the door.
I leaned back against the door and took a deep breath. Sensual tingles were running over my skin as more images filled my head; Odin wrapped around me, Odin above and inside me, Odin's magic stroking and filling me; they went on and on. I slid to the cool floor and closed my eyes as I gave in to the visions and the pleasure they brought.
They poured through me, and by the time they were over, I was certain of two things; I had once been Sabine, Odin's dead wife, and my soul—Sabine's soul—loved Odin as much as he had loved me. As much as he might love me still.
“Oh, fuck me,” I whispered. “This is not good.”
Chapter Seven
When I joined Thor in Bilskinir's dining hall, I found him talking to Morpheus. Morph was the God Squad's newest member. We'd had a rocky start, but he turned out to be a damn good guy. He was a god of dreams in the Greek Pantheon, and even though he'd joined us, his brothers and his parents are still our enemies.
Morpheus and his family had been killing humans in their dreams because Zeus, head of the Greek Pantheon, controlled Ambrosia—the Greek immortality food, and would only distribute it to gods who obeyed him. Morpheus and his family didn't want to be slaves to Zeus, so they found another way to get their immortality. I found out about it after Morpheus mistook me for a regular human and attacked me in a dream. I convinced Morpheus to stop killing and join us, but now, I had to do something about Zeus. Morpheus needed Ambrosia, and the other Greek gods needed to be freed from Zeus' control.
Unfortunately, with Hades drunk half the time and comatose the other half, we couldn't gather enough support with the Greeks to rally them against Zeus. Morpheus had been working with Pan to change that, but they simply didn't have the influence that Hades did.
I figured that Morpheus was here to talk to us about going at Zeus from another angle. I was wrong.
“Hey, V,” Morpheus said in a tired tone. “How's it fanging?”
“How's it what?” I scrunched my face at him.
“You know; fanging, instead of hanging,” he explained. “I thought it would be funny because of the whole vampire thing. Never mind; I'm tired. Sorry.”
“What's going on, Morph?” I asked.
“Hades is neglecting his duties,” Morpheus said.
“Tell me something I don't know,” I said as I accepted a cup of coffee from Thor.
“Zeus is taking advantage of it.” Morpheus clenched his jaw before continuing. “He's calling for a vote from the Twelve Olympians to have Hades cast out of the Underworld.”
“He can't do that,” I huffed. “Hades built that place; his magic is entwined with the territory.”
“It's a collective territory, and Zeus has always wanted to expand his control to Hades,” Morpheus said. “Hades, as in the Underworld, not the man.”
“Yes; we're following,” Thor said gently. “Why don't you sit down, Morpheus?”
“Uh, thanks.” Morpheus fell into a chair and slumped. “I don't know what to do; Hades doesn't even care. He won't listen to me.”
“We were intending on going there today anyway,” Thor said. “We'll talk to him.”
“Thank you,” Morpheus said in relief. “If Zeus gets control of the Underworld, we're all fucked.”
“He won't,” I promised. “Zeus is meant to fall.”
I blinked and looked away from Morpheus' surprised face. Why had I said that?
“I like your confidence, V,” Morpheus said. “But Zeus has most of Olympus under his thumb. It would take a miracle to take him down.”
“Hey, guys!” Ull said merrily as he walked into the dining hall. “Look who's with me.”
Odin walked in after Ull, and I stared at him in shock; he rarely came to Bilskinir. Odin had once been on the opposite side of the God War from Thor and me, but he had given up his position as a wedding present to us and had been trying to repair his family ties. Vali and Vidar, Thor's brothers, had returned to Valaskjalf at Odin's request but things were still awkward among them. Ull, Thor's son by his ex-wife, had been trying to get everyone past that awkwardness.
Seeing Odin when those visions were still fresh in my mind was disturbing. I found myself superimposing images of the old him over the new one, and it was hard to look at my father-in-law without blushing. This was so fucked up. Should I tell Thor? Should I tell Odin? Should I just keep my damn mouth shut? I met Odin's gaze and realized that I didn't have to tell him; Odin already knew. I had a feeling that he'd known for some time.
Past interactions I'd had with Odin replayed in my head; the time he'd given me tarot cards for Yule—cards which had belonged to Sabine, the way he'd stare at me, the way he said my name strangely. As I looked at him now, Odin's single eye widened, and his lips parted. He knew that I knew. Great.
I shifted my gaze to Ull and froze. Ull's eyes suddenly drew me closer, and the next thing I knew, I was hugging him tightly.
“Uh, okay.” Ull laughed as he hugged me back. “It's good to see you too, Mom.”
“Mom?” I blinked as I leaned away from him.
Ull frowned and looked at Thor for help. “Why is Mom acting weird?”
“You know that she's still adjusting to your penchant for calling her 'Mom,'” Thor chided his son.
“Mom,” I whispered again as another vision rose up in my mind.
Mommy! Please don't forget me!
“Oh, fuck,” I whispered as I covered my eyes; I was tearing up.
“Vervain?” Thor asked with horror as he slid an arm around me. “What is it, darling?”
“I remembered something,” I whispered.
“Vervain, perhaps you should give yourself some time to process,” Odin said hurriedly. “Sit down.”
“I'm okay,” I said but I sat down anyway. “I've just been having strange visions this morning.”
“Visions?” Ull asked; his stare going sharp. “What kind of visions?”
“I don't know,” I whispered. “But I just heard your voice, Ull. Except it wasn't your voice.”
“Ull? Your vision was about Ull?” Odin looked surprised and then relieved. “What did he say?”
“He begged me not to forget him,” I said as I stared at Ull. Suddenly, his eyes were in another face; a child's face. I started to cry again. “I'm sorry,” I sobbed. “I don't know why I'm crying.”
“I've been seeing things too,” Ull said as he sat beside me and took my hand. “I saw myself standing before me, and that other me was a dragon.”
“A dragon?” Thor asked with huge eyes. “What the hell is happening?”
“I don't know,” Odin mused, “but this feels wrong. Everything about this day feels wrong.”
“As if I'm in another person's life,” Morpheus added with a nod. “Do you think someone has enchanted us?”
“Toward what end?” Thor huffed. “Come on; we're gods. No one has enchanted us; we're all just tired and stressed over this situation with Hades.”
“Maybe,” I murmured as I glanced at Odin.
Odin slightly shook his head.
I stood abruptly, and everyone looked at me in surprise.
“I'm going to make us breakfast,” I declared as if it were a call to war. “You guys stay here and relax; I think we could all use some food in our bellies.”
“Thank you, darling,” Thor kissed my forehead and took a seat.
“I'll help you,” Odin offered. “I don't think you should be alone right now.”
“Thanks, Dad,” Thor said with a smile toward Odin.
I nodded absently and headed into the kitchen. Thor's kitchen was all stainless steel and modern appliances. I guess it was my kitchen too, but it didn't feel like it. I'd been meaning to add a few Vervain touches but all I'd done so far was put out my latte maker and a hanging basket for fruit. Now, I was in the massive, cold room with Thor's father and, ironically, it felt more l
ike home.
“Am I Sabine?” I turned on Odin immediately.
Odin flinched and then his face sort of crumpled. He ran a hand tiredly over his eyes and swallowed roughly before answering.
“I believe so,” he whispered.
“Oh, this is so fucked up,” I groaned. “How long have you known?”
“I suspected it when we first met,” he admitted. “But I didn't know for certain until the wedding. When I saw you walking down the aisle toward my son, I also saw Sabine; walking toward me on our wedding day.”
“Jesus Christ,” I whispered.
“Well, that's hardly appropriate,” Odin said with a little smile.
I made a surprised bark of laughter and then shook my head. “What are we going to do?”
“Do?” Odin asked in surprise. “Nothing, Vervain. You are not my wife anymore; this is a new life for you, and you found happiness with my son. It tears at me, of course, but I also rejoice to know that you live again. It's enough for me to simply see you and be able to speak with you again. I hope that you won't be unsettled by this and take that from me.”
“Of course not,” I whispered. “Thank you for not trying to...”
“To break apart your marriage?” Odin asked with lifted brows. “Having lost you once myself, I would never wish that upon my son. A parent will sacrifice anything for their child; even their own happiness.”
“The things I saw, Odin,” I drew closer to him. “Is Vidar...?” I swallowed as Odin's eyes went large. “Is he our son?”
“Yes,” Odin whispered. “But I don't see how we can tell him.”
“How can we not? His mother is alive.”
I started to cry again, although I wasn't sure who it was for. I still had the image of a blue-eyed boy in my head, but I was certain he was not Vidar. So, who was he?
“Easy now, sweetheart,” Odin cooed as he hugged me. “We'll figure this out. You can never have too much love; it's the lack of it that kills you. Trust me; I know. I've been slowly dying from the moment I lost you.”