The Handbook

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The Handbook Page 16

by H. P. Mallory

“You’re going to wait here?” I asked when she didn’t unbuckle her seat belt.

  “Yeah, is that okay?”

  “I guess so,” I answered as I hightailed it into the store. We were on a mission to pick up donuts. In the midst of studying The Femme Fatale Handbook, Dani and I were experiencing a bout of low blood sugar which was compromising our ability to focus. And the answer to an inability to study due to low energy is donuts. I scooped up two boxes of them, paid for them and was on my way out, when I nearly walked headfirst into … Beau?

  “Shit,” I said in shock, mostly because I nearly found myself up close and personal with his chest.

  “I’m glad to see you too,” he smirked down at me.

  I glanced over at Dani and found she was looking down at something, probably her phone, and didn’t even realize who I’d just had the misfortune of nearly colliding with. Reminding myself that Beau had just said something to me, I was about to respond with a snide comment, but then Jane’s voice piped up in my head, reminding me to keep my cool. Femme fatales didn’t say snide comments. Luckily, Beau spared me the opportunity to come up with something to say on the spot.

  “Donuts,” he said as he glanced down at the boxes in my hand and his grin broadened. “Please tell me you’re bringing those to my house?”

  Even though his comment irritated the shit out of me, I calmly smiled up at him and mentally reminded myself to channel Marilyn Monroe and my own innocent, inner child. “Actually, I’m headed back to my room but,” I started and then smiled as sweetly as I was able to, even though I had a hell of a time ungritting my teeth. “Would you like one?”

  “How can I refuse?” he asked with a smile.

  I forced a laugh, all the while promising myself that this was the best way to deal with him. Showing anger would make me appear like I cared too much. And I no longer cared about him at all. Yes, friendly indifference was the way to go. “I don’t think you can,” I responded as I held out both boxes. “Chocolate or powdered?”

  “Chocolate, please.”

  I didn’t respond but opened the box and held it out in front of him, offering him his pick. He gave me another charming smile and reached in, grabbing the donut closest to him.

  “Thanks, Nikki,” he said as he opened his mouth and took a huge bite. Only half of the thing remained.

  “You’re welcome,” I answered, all the while trying to look as sweet and unconcerned about the fact that this asshole had dumped me as soon as he’d slept with me. No, thoughts like that did not occupy my mind. Instead, I was cool and calculated. Calculated in as much as I would make sure this jerkoff was taken down a peg or two.

  I glanced back at my car and noticed Dani was now looking right at me. She pointed at Beau and made the motion of getting out of the car, as if asking me if she needed to intervene. I quickly shook my head before facing Beau again, all the while hoping he hadn’t noticed.

  “I meant to tell you,” he continued, apparently oblivious to the fact that Dani was in my car and watching us. He wiped a few crumbs off his lower lip after finishing the second half of the donut in one bite. “You’ve been looking really good lately. I kept noticing you in class, but I never said anything since we kind of ended on bad terms.”

  Yeah, because you were a jerk and never called me back after sleeping with me! I railed inside. But outside I maintained my breezy sensuality and smiled even more broadly. “Oh, thank you. That’s really nice of you to say.”

  “Hey, if you aren’t busy, you want to get together again? We could do a movie or dinner or just … stay in?”

  I nearly choked on his less-than-subtle insinuation about staying in but managed to hold myself together. “Oh, you know, I would love to, but I’m actually going to be pretty busy for a while.”

  “That’s the excuse you gave me last time.”

  I sighed as I nodded. “This time it’s actually true,” I said with a large smile.

  “I don’t know how you’d be busy when school is over,” he rebutted, looking confused and offended at the same time.

  “Maybe for some students, but I’m actually T.A.ing for Professor Anderson,” I responded proudly.

  “But you’re an undergraduate,” he continued with another frown.

  “Right, but that didn’t seem to faze Derek when he offered the job to me,” I answered, secretly relishing the fact that my use of Derek’s first name caused Beau to arch his eyebrows with unconcealed surprise. I laughed and then shook my head. “I guess he believes I’m qualified enough.”

  “Or maybe he’s got ulterior motives,” he pointed out.

  You mean, like you do? I thought to myself but managed not to say anything. “Oh, I doubt it. He’s a professor. I’m a student—you know how that goes.”

  “Just be careful, Nik,” he continued as he took a step closer to me. “I would hate it if anyone ever took advantage of you.”

  I wanted to tell him just what I thought of him, but instead I stood up straight and tall and smiled up at him as I batted my lashes a few times. “Thank you for worrying about me. I do appreciate it.” Then I glanced at my cell phone. “But I really have to get going. I’m so glad I ran into you though. It was really nice to see you.”

  “I’m going to let you go for now,” Beau answered, talking a bit louder because I’d already started making my way toward my car. “But I’m going to call you for dinner this week.”

  “Okay,” I answered as I unlocked the car door, and handing the boxes to Dani, said underneath my breath, “but I won’t take you up on it.”

  “I’m really happy I saw you, Nikki,” he continued as he started toward the minimart but continued looking back at me. He glanced at Dani momentarily and gave her a little, surprised wave, like he’d only now just noticed she was there.

  I seated myself behind the wheel and waved to him as I started the engine.

  “You okay?” Dani asked as she faced me with concern.

  “Yeah, I’m fine,” I answered and gave her a big smile. “I’m actually more than fine.”

  Yes, I had done very well. I hadn’t come off as bitter or angry and, instead, I’d rekindled Beau’s interest by playing attentive yet occupied. Keep up the game and he’d be eating out of my hand soon enough. Jane would be proud.

  “What were you talking about?” Dani asked as I backed out of the parking spot and headed toward the driveway.

  “Um, he asked me out again.”

  “What?” Dani asked, her mouth dropping open. “What an asshole!”

  “Yep.”

  “So what did you say?”

  “I said I was busy.”

  “And what did he say?”

  “That he would call me next week.”

  “And what did you say?”

  I shrugged as I pulled up to a red light and turned to face her. “I said okay.”

  “What?” she asked with a frown. “Don’t tell me …”

  “No, no, no,” I interrupted. “I’m playing the game, Dani. I’m going to turn the tables on him.”

  “Ohhhh,” Dani said as she nodded. “You smart, conniving bitch.”

  We both laughed as I pulled into the drive-thru at the Major Burger. We rarely ate hamburgers, but I suddenly had a craving.

  “You do realize that we just pulled into the Major Burger, right?” Dani asked.

  “I’ve got this incredible craving for French fries and a strawberry shake,” I replied.

  “Oh, my God, that sounds so good, but make mine a chocolate shake.” She took a breath. “I think you deserve fries, a shake and plenty of donuts after that spectacular performance.”

  “I think I have to agree.”

  After we ordered and drove through to pick up and pay, I pulled out onto the street and headed for the park. It was well past midnight when we sat down at one of the picnic tables near the swings and dug into our well-deserved food.

  “This is so going to put zits all over my face,” Dani giggled. “But, oh, my God, it’s been so long since we did t
his.”

  “I know,” I said as I replayed the conversation I’d just had with Beau. Suddenly, I wasn’t sure if I really was doing the right thing. I mean, who was to say that everything in the notebook was really something worth following? “Dani?” I asked as I sucked down a few gulps of shake.

  “Yeah?”

  “Do you think we’re doing the right thing?” I asked.

  “What do you mean?”

  I shrugged. “I don’t know. It just occurred to me that maybe what we’re doing isn’t the right thing to be doing? I mean, I feel like that notebook has definitely helped me to regain control of my life, but what if the opposite is actually true? What if we’re way too concerned with controlling people and, in Beau’s case, revenge?”

  “I don’t look at it that way at all. And I don’t think you should either.”

  “I’m just wondering if we’re playing with fire by doing this,” I said as I piled a few fries into my mouth.

  “I think you’re having a moment of guilt after your interaction with Beau,” Dani said. “But what I would point out is that he used you for sex and then dumped you on your ass.”

  “Yes, I guess that’s true,” I said. “But does that make what I’m planning on doing to him right?”

  “What are you planning on doing to him?” she asked.

  I shrugged. “I don’t know. I guess I just want to wrap him around my finger so I can treat him the way he treated me. Well, minus the sex part.”

  “Okay,” Dani said with a quick nod as she dove into a powdered donut. “And are you forcing him in some way to fall for you?”

  “Well, no,” I said. “I don’t even know if he will fall for me.”

  “But if he does, he’s doing so by the freedom of his own will, right?” she asked. I nodded and she continued. “So, as far as I can tell, you aren’t forcing anything on him. If he’s gullible enough to fall for you and you play him, then that’s his own problem. Just like it was your own problem for sleeping with him and getting dumped.”

  “You have a blunt way of putting things,” I said with a laugh, but I knew she was right.

  “Mean what you say and say what you mean,” she announced. “And regarding the femme fatale stuff, you said yourself that it made you feel freer and more in control of your life, right?” she asked as I nodded. “So, that can’t be all bad, can it?”

  “I guess you’re right. It can’t be all bad. I mean, we’re becoming more self-confident and we aren’t letting guys treat us the way they used to. I feel more in control of my life and my emotions too, so maybe I’m looking at this wrong.”

  “I think so,” she said as she dipped back into her basket of fries. “You are woman, hear you roar, remember?”

  I laughed as I remembered my meeting with Derek earlier. “So, I took Derek up on the position of his assistant.”

  “Good for you. That will certainly make seducing him easier.”

  I nodded as I remembered his smile when we were teasing each other. “I have to admit, I’m sort of looking forward to seducing him.”

  “Ah, you’re finally realizing how hot he is?”

  I cocked my head to the side as I considered it. “I’m not sure it’s that, although, yes, I can admit he’s pretty good looking.”

  “Hot, Nikki, he’s hot.”

  “Okay, he’s hot,” I admitted with a laugh. “There’s just something else about him that makes me laugh. It’s almost like he’s got this boyish charm that’s exasperating at the same time that it’s kind of … cute.”

  “Uh oh,” Dani said as she shook her head.

  “What do you mean?” I demanded.

  “Don’t go falling for your target,” she insisted, her manner now serious. “Remember that, Nikki.”

  “Oh my God, I’m not going to fall for him,” I ground out, irritated that she would even think that was a possibility.

  “Okay, just wanted to make sure,” she said as she studied me with narrowed eyes. “Remember why you’re doing this. To prove to yourself and to me that it really works. And if you get a boyfriend out of it, all the better I guess.”

  “I don’t want Derek to be my boyfriend,” I insisted.

  “Keep telling yourself that,” she answered as she sucked the last of her chocolate shake through the straw and I frowned at her. “No, I mean it—keep telling yourself that. Because the moment you get attached and give up the game, that’s the moment you lose.”

  TWENTY-FOUR

  The Femme Fatale Handbook

  Part Two: Putting all of this to use

  Chapter Eight: Keep Him Guessing

  What’s the number one killer to a successful seduction and to relationships in general? Boredom. Once he loses interest in you or guesses your game, you’re no longer playing. So, how do we make sure that doesn’t happen? It’s easy—you have to keep him on his toes. Don’t ever let him figure you out.

  Most people in general wear their emotions on their sleeves which makes them sooo easy to figure out. Be the opposite. Be a contradiction. Test—if someone is able to describe you in a word or two, that means it’s time to change it up. If people think of you as overly sensitive, learn how to get a tougher exterior. If you’re usually the joking, takes-nothing-too-seriously person, develop a pensive and thoughtful side. If you’re usually timid and naive about everything, learn how to find your own inner cunning.

  And remember, it’s not enough to capture his interest with a sexy outfit, a provocative glance or a seductive smile. That’s just the beginning—just tricks of the trade to get him to make the first move. The key is to capture him, to ensnare him with your magical spell and keep him enthralled, and the only way you can do that is through your personality. Make him think there’s more to you than what he sees on the surface. Men love to figure things out. They’re driven to conquer, and what better way to placate that instinct within them than to supply them with a riddle they think they can figure out but never do?

  The key to keeping him on his toes and forever guessing is not something that you need to work on over time. It needs to happen as soon as you both open your mouths and initiate conversation. Send mixed signals from the very start, that way he doesn’t jump to conclusions about you, conclusions which are usually very hard to break. Within those first few minutes of meeting you, maybe he starts to formulate the opinion that you’re confident, funny and smart, but then you pique his interest by very subtly hinting at a shy or devilish side to your personality.

  And don’t be afraid to be a little bad. Not all of your characteristics need to be good ones. When was the last time you fell in love with a hero in a romance novel who was entirely good? Never, right? Instead, you fell for the rogue with the questionable background who wants to be better than he is but somehow he just can’t seem to ignore his baser, lustful and animalistic nature. The same thing goes for men. They won’t be drawn in by the innocent prairie girl with the braids who’s only thinking about marriage. They will, however, be drawn in by the innocent girl with the devilish glint in her eyes who seems shy but then drops a few hints that she’s anything but.

  ***

  NIKKI

  “So I’ve discovered one drawback to all of this seduction stuff,” I said as I took a sip of my margarita and chomped on a tortilla chip loaded with guacamole. We were having dinner at a local Mexican restaurant, Guadalupe’s. In about three hours, all the tables in the bar would be cleared in favor of a dance floor.

  “Oh?” Dani asked. “What’s that?”

  “I’m freaking horny!” I responded with a little laugh. “I mean, all of this teasing is fine and good, but I’m getting sick of tending to my own sexual needs.”

  Dani shrugged as she appeared to think about it. “Well, do you think it goes against the rules to have a lover? I mean, if he’s just used for that express purpose and nothing else?”

  I took a swig of my margarita and was quiet as I considered her question. “I guess not. As long as we don’t want anything serious with him.�
�� Then I sighed. “But, seriously, it’s getting to be too much.”

  “I know,” she answered. “I kind of wanted to nail that guy last night.” She was talking about some guy we’d met while we were working out at the school gym.

  “They’re the ones who are supposed to do the nailing,” I laughed. “You don’t really have the hammer or the nail.”

  “I’m serious, dude.”

  I nodded. “Aren’t you losing your mind?”

  “Yeah, of course! I mean, we have all these cute guys we’re talking to and we can’t do anything with them. It’s like being a kid in a toy store and you aren’t allowed to play with any of the toys.”

  “True, but I guess we could always go back to the way we used to be,” I said with a shrug. “We’re the ones who decided to do this. No one’s forcing us.”

  “Ugh,” Dani grumbled. “I hate it when you talk all devil’s advocate on me.” I munched another chip and took the last remaining blob of guacamole. “Thanks for hogging all the guac, by the way,” she said with a frown.

  “It’s not my fault that you don’t like it as much as I do!” I responded with a little laugh. “And, anyway, you should be able to tell me why I’m feeling this way, right?”

  I was referring to the fact that Dani was in the process of getting her degree in psychology. “Swallow that mouthful so I don’t have to continue to be grossed out and maybe I’ll tell you what I think.”

  I smiled as I downed the offending bite with a gulp of margarita and then faced her expectantly. “I love it when you put your soon-to-be psychology degree to practice.”

  “So do I, because it reminds me that all this money I’m spending on an education is actually worth a damn. Not that figuring out your sexual frustration is of any economical advantage to me …”

  “So what, get to the good stuff,” I insisted as I waved her away with an unconcerned hand.

  “I think you’re channeling your inner man.”

  “Um, what?” I asked as the waiter stopped in front of our table and unloaded a plate of enchiladas in front of me and a taco salad in front of Dani. We thanked him, and once he walked away, she continued.

 

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