by Jill Lynn
She hoped so.
“Are you sure you shouldn’t just stay? I could sleep in the barn.”
Emma laughed. Those were drastic measures to avoid a night with Hudson. And also very much like something she would read in one of her historical romance novels, with the man trying to save the woman’s reputation from being tarnished.
“No need for that. You’ll be fine.” Her voice was bright. Phony to her own ears. “If you need anything or have a question—big or small—call me. I’ll answer any time of the night.” She kissed Hudson’s forehead, silently praying that things would go well for him and Gage. “I’ll see you two in the morning.”
Crisp air nipped at her as she hurried to her car. The temperature had dropped dramatically once the sun had slipped behind the mountains. She got in, started the engine but then didn’t budge.
Would Gage and Hudson be okay? What if the baby screamed all night? Should she be doing something more? Her windpipe shrunk down to straw proportions.
“God, I need You to handle this. Please.” Emma couldn’t fix this situation for any of them. And Gage had to step into his role as Hudson’s caregiver. Emma would help him as much as she could, but the two of them needed to bond. If they formed an attachment, it would go yards toward Gage keeping Hudson. The kind of healing the man was unknowingly desperate for was currently in his arms in the shape of a wiggly baby boy.
Emma blasted the heat, then turned her phone up to the highest volume for texts or calls and switched off the other app notifications. If Gage needed her, she didn’t want to miss him.
While she had her phone in hand, she sent a text to her sister-in-law, Cate. I’m doing the right thing leaving them, right? Guilt over abandoning Gage was piling up.
Thankfully Cate answered quickly.
Yes! If you stay, it will just prolong Gage figuring this out on his own. And, unfortunately, he has to. Zeke didn’t name you as the baby’s guardian. (Though had he known you, I have no doubt you’d have been number one on his list.) This is Gage’s situation to handle. Come home.
Okay. You’re right. Thanks.
Anytime. And if you happen to bring home a pizza, I won’t complain. Kidding! Because I know you’d do exactly that. I already have heartburn and don’t want to add to it.
Emma chuckled. Cate was eating for three, and she was doing an excellent job of it. And Luc was as doting as a husband could be. If Emma wasn’t such a romantic, their relationship would be cause for mucho eye rolling. As it was, she was faintly envious of what they had. Luc and Cate had started off rocky, but once they’d figured out they were both still crazy about each other, they’d been solid. Steady.
Even with unexpected twins on the way.
The front light on Gage’s house switched off. Was that a good sign? Was Hudson asleep? Why hadn’t Emma thought to install some sort of video baby monitor? There was probably a kind that would have hooked up to an app on her phone. That would have been an excellent idea.
And completely intrusive.
Emma had claimed not to be a stalker, but based on her current thoughts, the accusation would definitely stick.
“Fine. I’ll wait it out. Just for a bit.” She switched off the engine. There was nothing wrong with sitting there for a little while just to make sure Gage or Hudson didn’t panic. That way if Gage called or texted, she’d be close by to assist. If not, he didn’t need to know she hadn’t left yet. And she wasn’t about to text Cate and relay her new plan, because she was pretty sure it wouldn’t be met with approval.
Emma found a sweatshirt in the back that she could scrunch up as a pillow, reclined her seat and closed her eyes. After a short nap, she’d head home and no one would be the wiser.
* * *
She’d left him. Emma had promised to help, and now Gage was alone with a baby. He didn’t even know how to change a diaper! Should he set an alarm for that sort of thing? Or would Hudson let him know when it was time? Wasn’t there something about the diaper—or a line on it—changing color? Emma had explained it all earlier when she’d given him a lesson. He had listened, but now he couldn’t remember the details.
Babies should come with a manual. A legal contract would be even better.
Gage walked with Hudson through the kitchen and back into the living room, copying what he’d seen Emma do. But, instead of resting his head on Gage’s shoulder, Hudson arched back to study his new mode of transportation. The soft material of the navy blue footed pajamas Emma had changed him into stretched with the movement.
Hudson peered up with curious blue eyes. His hair held a hint of auburn, but mostly brown. His chubby fist grasped Gage’s shirt near his collar. He didn’t look tired. When Emma had been holding him, he had, but now?
Not even close.
“What are we going to do with each other?”
No answer. No smiles like Ruby had conjured.
Might as well lay him down and see what happened. Earlier today the crew at his house had set up a portable crib/playpen in his guest bedroom. Gage didn’t have a permanent crib yet, and he wouldn’t be needing one if things went according to plan.
He headed down the hall and into the bedroom, settling Hudson into the portable crib with his blanket and a stuffed elephant. Hudson stared as he backed away.
What now? Would he put himself to sleep?
Gage retreated to the master bedroom, giving his king-size bed a longing glance as he entered his bathroom. Could he risk sleeping in here tonight? What if Hudson cried and he couldn’t hear him? Maybe he should have put the portable crib in his room for the first night. Was it too late for that?
A wail sounded as he rinsed his toothbrush and deposited it back into the holder.
Guess that answered his worry about being too far away. Even someone hard of hearing wouldn’t be able to miss the tornado siren coming from across the hall.
He found Hudson twisted up with his blanket, as if he’d been rolling around and got stuck. Fat, sad tears rolled down the baby’s cheeks, which had turned splotchy.
Gage pulled him out of the mess, snagged the blanket and held it against Hudson’s back. What now? He walked into the living room. Hudson peered this way and that, probably looking for Emma. Or his dad. Or his nanny.
“I’m sorry you’re stuck with me, buddy. I’d be upset, too. Are you hungry? Or not tired? What’s going on?”
When did kids start talking? Hopefully, around nine months old, because Gage could use some answers from the tyke.
It might be worth trying to feed him. What could it hurt?
Gage somehow managed to make a bottle while holding Hudson, though numerous powder spills and drops of water lined the counter after the impressive feat.
He headed for the espresso leather recliner in the living room and sat. Hudson drank a little, then stared at him. Nibbled on the bottle a bit more. Emma had only fed him the hour before so he probably wasn’t hungry, but Gage wasn’t sure what else to do. He didn’t have a lot of baby-whispering options up the sleeve of his waffle shirt.
He gave up on the bottle, setting it on the floor next to the chair.
Hudson’s head rested in the crook of Gage’s arm. His eyes flooded. A whimper escaped, followed by a cry.
All day, Gage had held himself in check. Not allowing himself to reflect on what Hudson had been through. What he’d lost. First his mother. Now his dad. It was too much for a baby to contend with. That’s why Gage wanted to find him the perfect forever home, and fast. Hudson needed a mom and a dad. Ones who knew what they were doing. Who could give him the love he deserved and the family he needed.
“Your dad was my closest friend in law school.” Like a rusty engine, Hudson’s cry stuttered. “He was the kind of guy who would do anything for you.”
Somehow, he’d gained the baby’s rapt attention. And he wasn’t about to lose it and have him start crying again, so Gage
kept talking. “When things went bad with Nicole, he was there for me. I’m not sure I was as there for him when your mom—” Gage swallowed. “When she went to heaven. I tried, but I just...didn’t know what I was doing.”
If only Zeke hadn’t attempted to outfly that storm, he’d be holding his son right now instead of an inept Gage.
Zeke had been rushing to get back from a meeting in Aspen. He’d had his pilot’s license for years and was meticulous about following protocol. That’s why the accident had come as such a shock. But he’d hurried through his preflight check in order to beat the weather and then encountered mechanical issues that could have been avoided.
Moisture coated Gage’s eyes, and he blinked to clear it away. If Hudson went to another home, would they keep Zeke’s memory alive for the boy?
He’d never thought about that before.
Hudson’s face contorted, and he howled again, adding some kicks of frustration. Gage understood the sentiment.
“There was this one time in school...”
Once again, Hudson paused to listen. Perhaps he was searching, hoping to hear his dad’s voice. Either way, Gage kept talking. He told Hudson about his dad. He started with their first year of law school, and by the time he was three stories in, the boy was asleep.
Long lashes rested against his plump cheeks, body limp in Gage’s arms. Sweet boy. Zeke and Leila had sure made a cute kid.
Gently, Gage eased the recliner footrest up. He didn’t want to move and wake Hudson, so he’d close his eyes and rest here for a minute.
And maybe when he woke up, his life would make sense again.
Chapter Three
Why was her nose so cold? Had it frozen off her face?
Emma’s hand snaked up, rubbing the extremity. Like a sleeping limb, it buzzed, attempting to return from the land of glaciers. Had the heat kicked off in the cabin during the night?
She scrounged for her blankets, recognition of her whereabouts quickly registering when she latched onto her car’s steering wheel instead. A painful new kink in her neck made its presence known when she moved her seat to an upright position.
Emma scrambled for her phone. No messages or calls, so Gage and Hudson must be okay. And it was five in the morning.
Oops. The car was freezing, and so was she. She rubbed her arms through the sleeves of her down jacket. How could she have slept so long in such poor conditions?
“Birdie, I need you to start up nice and quiet now.” Emma tapped the dash of her Mini Cooper. When she’d purchased it, an I See Birds sticker had adorned the bumper. She’d since removed it, but the birding phrase had prompted her to choose the name.
The car’s engine, usually a gentle purr, roared. “Shh. Did you turn into a lion overnight? That’s enough noise out of you.” She kept her headlights off as she slowly eased down Gage’s drive. Emma had no desire to wake anyone up or notify Gage that she’d slept in front of his house for the last few hours.
When she got back to the cabin, Emma snuck inside quietly, attempting not to disturb her sister, Mackenzie, who slept in the other bedroom.
She climbed into bed, the warmth a comfort, but couldn’t shake the chill from her body. After about an hour of hoping sleep would come, she gave up and readied for the day. A hot shower and a cup of tea did wonders for bringing her back to normal temps. She dressed in a black T-shirt—Best Aunt Ever scrawled across it in white print—along with skinny jeans and a long, comfortable cardigan.
She was sitting at the small kitchen table, nursing a second cup of tea, eating toast and reading her morning devotions when Mackenzie came out of her room in pajama bottoms and an old T-shirt sporting their high school mascot—a mustang. Even groggy and half-awake, Mackenzie was long and willowy and strong and feminine all at the same time.
Emma had gotten used to their sister roles long ago. She was of the plain and simple variety and liked reading, tea and binging on chick flicks. Mackenzie was far more adventurous, always needing to conquer the next thing. She could be found white-water rafting or taking bull riding lessons. Actually, she hadn’t tried that last thing. Yet.
“Hey, you’re up early.” Mackenzie shuffled to the coffeepot and gazed longingly at it as if sheer desire might make the necessary contents jump inside.
“Didn’t sleep great this morning. I’m about to head back over to Gage’s. See if he and Hudson survived the night.”
“That’s right.” Mackenzie removed the coffee from the freezer and filled the reusable filter with grounds, then added water from the pitcher in the fridge. The girl liked her coffee a certain way, so Emma never attempted to make it for her. “I’m sure they were fine. Gage will do great with him,” she added with a dismissive wave.
Her sister didn’t have the same concern over Gage and the baby that Emma did. But then, she hadn’t been the one to encourage Gage to keep Hudson in the first place when he’d wanted to find someone else right away.
He’d tried, though. Right now there weren’t any other options. So Emma really hadn’t pushed him into a decision he wouldn’t have come to on his own.
“Still, I should get over there. You know how hard taking care of a baby can be.”
Mackenzie got out a mug with the new Wilder Ranch logo that Cate had recently designed. None of the mugs in their cupboard matched, and Emma liked it that way. Each morning she picked out one that best fit her day. Her mood. Today hers was one she’d made in ceramics class back in high school. Just the right size but a little off-kilter.
Her sister covered a yawn. “Not really.”
True. Mackenzie didn’t involve herself much with the Kids’ Club that Emma ran. And when they’d been younger, Emma had babysat a ton while Mackenzie had given riding lessons to earn spending money.
The two of them were night-and-day different but managed to get along. For that, Emma was thankful.
She cleared her dishes and said goodbye to her sister, then hopped back into her car, which still held a bit of the warmth from when she’d driven it home early this morning.
When she arrived at Gage’s, the time on her dash read seven thirty. It was crazy early in the morning to arrive at someone’s house, but she doubted Gage would complain.
Emma grabbed her purse and her to-go mug of steeping tea. Three cups was more than her norm, but she needed the extra—albeit small—boost of caffeine it would offer.
She stood on the step of Gage’s sprawling ranch house and knocked lightly. It had been his uncle’s ranch until a few years ago. Kip Frasier. A quiet but sweet man who always kept candy in his pocket at church and would dole it out to kids. He’d never married or had children of his own. When he’d passed away, he’d left the ranch to Gage. People really liked to leave things to the man. Land. House. Baby.
Gage had lived here only a little over two years.
The door swung open. Gage’s hair was damp as if he’d recently showered, and he wore a plaid shirt unbuttoned over a white T-shirt with jeans and leather slippers.
Gage Frasier, you are one attractive man.
One who, unfortunately, didn’t see her as anything more than a neighbor or his friend’s little sister. Emma wasn’t even on his datable radar.
The only good part about Gage not being interested in her in that way—besides the fact that she’d never be able to give up on the dream of having children—was that she wouldn’t have to admit to him that she had something in common with his ex-wife.
Before Nicole had run off with James the Homewrecker, Emma had dated him.
The whole ordeal was embarrassing. Mortifying. She’d been so naive and foolish. Emma should have known immediately that everything James spouted was a lie—as if anyone would ever find her as irresistible as he had claimed she was—but she’d allowed herself to be swept away by his flattering words and gestures. He’d been as fake and slimy as the toy goo her niece Ruby liked to play with.
/>
“Morning.” Gage’s voice had that scratchy, unused-as-of-yet quality.
“How’s Hudson? How’d the night go? Did either of you sleep?”
His mouth tugged up at the corners, and her girlish hopes and dreams gave a collective sigh at what would never be. “Come in, Emma.”
She did, the quiet click of the door sounding behind her. There was no sign of the baby anywhere...
She took off her coat, and Gage hung it in the front closet, storing her purse, too. She set her tea on the entry table as Gage motioned for her to follow him. They walked down the hall and into the guest bedroom. With beige walls and a simple olive green bedspread on the full-size bed, the room was masculine. If Hudson stayed, she’d offer to help redo it into something more fitting for a baby boy. Maybe with a vintage airplane theme in honor of his father, Zeke. A nice framed sketch or two, with a light blue color on the walls. Brown accents.
Getting ahead of yourself, girl. Rein it in.
Emma didn’t even know how the night had gone, and here she was, planning the future.
Hudson was asleep on his back in the portable crib, one chubby hand above his head in a fist like he was cheering in victory. As if sensing their presence, his eyelids fluttered, then opened.
“What a good boy you are! You slept in your own bed? Such a big boy.” Emma had him in her arms before he could consider crying.
“Actually, he slept with me in the recliner for most of the night.” Visions of Hudson snoozing on Gage’s chest made her own constrict.
Was there a more attractive picture than that?
Emma laid him on the bed and proceeded to change his diaper while he studied both her and Gage. Hudson arched his back when she tried to put his footie pajamas back on his feet, so she tickled his tummy, distracting him so that she could finish the task.
“Are you hungry?” Emma asked Hudson as she picked him back up.
“Ba.”
“Ba,” she repeated back to him. “That could mean yes. Or no. Or nothing.” Her amusement earned a drowsy smile from him in return. “Do you like scrambled eggs?” Those were soft. Or he might prefer a bottle or pureed baby food. “Let’s go figure out some breakfast.”