by Jahquel J
“What? I didn’t try to fuck Darian. Cindy, you know me and know that is not how I move. Why would I do that?” My heart was beating out of chest so hard in fear.
“Golden, you never have a nigga, and I’ve been watching how you walk around him. He told me everything. If you didn’t have the money for the game that was fine, but to offer pussy… you’re a filth.”
“I swear on my son’s life that he came on to me. He touched me and wanted to have sex with me. It’s snowing and supposed to be a storm, what am I supposed to do?”
“Hold on,” she sighed and closed the door and then opened it. Pushing the plastic bag with our blankets and pillows toward me. “You can come in the morning when Darian is at his interview to pick up your stuff.” She shut the door in my face and tears poured down my face.
What was I supposed to tell Gyan? He wouldn’t understand all of this. All he would understand was the fact that we weren’t able to stay in Cindy’s apartment and we were back to sleeping in the car. At this moment, I felt like a failure and a shitty ass mother for letting the one person I was supposed to protect down. Bending down, I grabbed the plastic bag and headed down the stairs. Cindy might have had a valid reason if it was any other person. Except, it was me, and she knew I wasn’t like that at all. Darian was the one who had cheated on her with his baby mother. Still, it was easier to point the blame my way, instead of facing the reality that her nigga was no good.
We barely made it back to the car because of how hard the snow was coming down. Gyan was a heavy sleeper, so he slept the entire way back to the car. Popping the locks, I sat him in the front seat and then got into the driver’s side. Pulling away, I found a secluded block and left the car on for a while. I didn’t want to put more gas into the car tomorrow, but we needed to be warm through the night. The house across the street had a little traffic, but everyone seemed to be in their own world and not paying attention to my car in the back of the block. Every night we slept in this car, I prayed that no one found us or called child protective services on us. My son was my world and I don’t know what I would do if something happened to him because of me. When Teri suggested I move back to New York, it seemed like the best fit. My grandmother would have welcomed me and my son in with welcoming arms. It seems like soon as I entered New York, nothing went right for me.
I couldn’t afford the apartments here, my grandmother was dead, and we were sleeping in our car for the entire six months we’ve been here. Now, I could add that my only friend accused me of trying to sleep with her boyfriend and tossed us back on the streets. Tomorrow, I didn’t plan to make her believe me or see my side of things. Cindy’s mind was made up, and she was going to believe what she wanted for the sake of keeping a man beside her every night. Although she did me wrong, I was going to allow Karma to do his job and pray for her. Hopefully, she woke up and realized that the man that she loved so much wasn’t worthy of her love. Pulling Gyan’s blanket over him, I reclined my chair back and wrapped mine around me and checked my surroundings before closing my eyes to get a little sleep.
6
Yoshon
“Why the fuck did I have to come to Brooklyn in the middle of a storm for this?” I slammed my hand on the wooden table. It wobbled and the fear in all our street soldiers’ eyes doubled.
I wasn’t the type that liked to throw around my position and act like the boss. That wasn’t me and I liked to play low-key. Apparently, these niggas thought it was okay to take money out my pocket like they were handing out free money out here. Yolani called me to have a meeting with them tonight because we couldn’t afford to continue to lose money. Drugs wasn’t where I got the majority of our money from, but that didn’t mean I had money to keep throwing out when I re-upped. This was Yolani’s business and it was something she took pride in. They had to set one of our traps on fire and then another one got hit. These niggas didn’t even look like they put up a damn fight. If I didn’t know better, it seemed like they helped load the shit up for these niggas.
“Boss, we didn’t know that a hit was coming. We were bagging the work like Yo said and we got hit,” the oldest of the crew replied.
“You never know when a hit is coming, dumb ass!” I barked and he cowered in the corner like the pussy he was. “Find me who the fuck is responsible for this shit. For tonight, shut all the traps down. It’s snowing, and these niggas will try and hit all of them up. Shut down shop and bring all the work to the warehouse in the city until further notice,” I demanded.
They all stood around and stared at me like I spoke Spanish or something. “Tonight, niggas!” Yolani raised her voice and they scattered like the roaches on the walls.
“What you got up your sleeves?”
“We about to pull all traps out the hood.”
Yolani stared at me with a grill that would intimidate her team, not me. “What the fuck you mean?”
“We’re supplying the hoods with that product and fucking up our neighborhoods. We need to bring the supply to the nice areas where the white folks at. They get higher than we do.”
Grape knew me like the back of his hand, and I knew him the same. I didn’t need to elaborate because he already knew what I meant. “How the crackheads supposed to get to us? This shit is stupid, if you ask me.”
“Just because something is stupid to you, doesn’t mean that it’s not right. A crackhead will cross the Atlantic Ocean to get a hit. We move, and they’ll come… trust,” Grape patted her on the back. “I’m heading home. Hit me in the morning and let me know the move so I can put the team on.”
“Bet,” Yolani said as she sat down at the table. From her expression, she didn’t agree with how things were going to be handled from now on. Still, she ran things in my absence, but it was me who made the final call, and if it wasn’t me, it was Grape.
“When am I going to get to have a say in shit? You tell me that I run this, and then you come and make decisions for me.”
“When you stop calling me, I’ll stop making the decisions for you. Go home. Hazel has been calling you.”
Standing up, she dapped me. “You good here?”
“Yeah, I’ll lock up and head home. Pit Pat made some lasagna,” I informed her. “You need to come by and spend more time with the old lady.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“Drive safe,” I said and pulled her in for a hug.
I looked around the house before I got the text message from Eva. She wanted to come spend the night, and after the day I had, I didn’t want to sleep alone tonight. After sending her a message back, I stepped onto the porch and lit a cigar. These niggas had me so pissed with the way they were moving. A lot of these niggas were going to find themselves on the unemployment line. In the new houses, there would be my top-ranking generals working there. The niggas that could hold down a simple crib in the suburbs. As I pulled on my cigar, I spotted a car a couple cars down from the house. These niggas had me so mad that I was smoking a cigar in the middle of a snowstorm. I would have drawn my gun except the Spiderman blanket stopped me. Then, a woman turned on her side and kissed a little boy’s forehead as she got as comfortable as she could.
Jogging down the steps, I walked over to the car and examined the little boy and woman closer. She had dried up tears on her face as she tried to get comfortable. If she was lying in a bed, she would have been tossing and turning with whatever that was on her mind. Putting the cigar out, I tapped on the window lightly. She jumped up and reached for something in her purse. Holding my hands up, I backed away from the car.
“Chill. It ain’t even like that.” I assured her. Pointing to the crib I had just come out of, I continued. “I own that crib right there.”
She rolled the window down with irritation and fear written all over her face. “W…what do you want?” she stammered.
“You good?”
“We’re fine,” she confirmed.
“Nah, you sleeping in the car and it’s snowing. Let me help you,” I offered and she sniffled. I co
uld tell from her eyes that she wanted to continue to cry.
“No, thank you. We don’t need your help; we’re fine. Just don’t call the police and we’ll be fine,” she told me and rolled the window back up.
Rubbing my hands together, I tapped the window for the second time. Rolling it back down, she had just irritation written all over her face. “I don’t know what you think this is. No, I’m not a crack head, and no, I’m not going to sleep with you. Just leave me the hell alone,” she snapped.
“Chill, that’s not what I’m looking for at all. I want to help you out, on the real. My condo isn’t too far from here, let me help you out.” Although my crib was in Jersey, I had a two-bedroom condo in the city for nights when I needed to get away from Pit Pat. I loved my grandmother to death, but she could tap dance on my nerves sometimes.
“As if I would go and stay in some strange man’s apartment with my child. Man, please get the fuck out my face.” Shorty was definitely feisty.
The street light glared on her face and all I saw was nothing but Melanin Magic. She was the color of a Hersey’s chocolate bar. Women looked for the perfect lighting to get the kind of glow she was giving me, and all she had was a dim and dingy street light. When she spoke, I caught a glimpse of her teeth, and they were perfectly aligned with each other and white. Her hair was pulled into a messy bun with a few pieces hanging in her face and in the back. Her diamond shaped eyes were a golden hue. The light shined right into them and they gave off their own light of their own.
“Ma, I can’t go home and climb into my bed knowing you and your seed are sleeping in a car,” I replied.
“Act like you didn’t see it then,” she quickly snapped and rolled her neck. “I don’t need you standing here trying to help me. Nobody has ever helped me without wanting something in return.”
“Then you ain't been meeting or hanging with the right people. Look, I have a condo not to—”
“Awh, shit! Please don’t tell me this shit!” she slammed her hand on the steering wheel and messed with the keys in the ignition. “I just got something fixed on this piece of shit,” she vented to herself.
“You definitely can’t stay out here tonight. Your window is open and you both will freeze before the salt trucks make it around.”
“My window would have been up if you didn’t keep harassing me. Just leave us alone.”
“Bet. I’ll just call child protective services in the morning. Little shorty don’t deserve to be out here in this cold. He’s fucking shivering,” I raised my voice.
Stepping out the car, she stared up at me, and it was then that I noticed lil’ mama was thicker than a snicker. The leggings she wore were practically clinging to her thick thighs and ass. “Who the fuck do you think you are telling me what my son don’t deserve!” she yelled and pointed her little chipped nail in my face.
“Here. Take my wallet and look at my address and all my information. Take my keys and you can drive us there.” I dug in my pockets and shoved everything into her hands. “Wait, here take my gun too. I stay strapped, so I didn’t want to alarm you.”
She stood there with everything in her hands and was still skeptical. “Just drive us to a laundry mat. He can sleep on the chairs while I wash his clothes for school tomorrow,” she instructed.
“Ma, you don’t see the weather. Ain’t gonna be no damn school tomorrow. Let me take you to my crib and I promise I’ll leave.”
She fought with her decision as she stared me up and down. “Mom, turn the heat up, I’m cold,” her son mumbled and pulled his blanket further up on his body.
“See…” my voice trailed off.
“Can you bring me back to my car tomorrow morning? And I’ll call 911 if you try something. I’m very good with descriptions,” she threatened me.
“You got it. Come on, grab your stuff and get into my car.” I helped her grab their things and picked up her son. She watched me like a hawk as I placed him gently in the back of my Tesla.
“Get inside; you’re shivering yourself.” I walked around to the passenger side and held the door open for her. When she slipped inside, she leaned back and closed her eyes briefly.
Hopping in, I hit the button to start the car and let the car heat up. When the heat came to the vents, I could of sworn I heard a moan escape from her lips. She rubbed her hands together and then rubbed her thighs. Staring at her, it made me wonder how such a beautiful woman ended up in a situation like this. Women and kids were homeless every day, but with her, she seemed like she was kept. As if she came from money or had money in the past. Something about her didn’t rub me that she had been struggling and ended up homeless.
“I have a condo in Prospect Heights. It’s two bedrooms, you can use either bedroom, and I’ll let you both stay there alone tonight… cool?”
“I… I don’t usually do this,” she broke out with tears. “I don’t get into men’s cars and stay in their condos with my son. That’s not the type of woman I am, I swear. I literally have sixty dollars to my name to last me until next week.” She sobbed into her hands.
I looked between her and the street. “I’m not judging you, Ma. I’d rather it be my car and condo then some of these other niggas. I’m not trying to ask for anything in return; I just can’t go lay my head down knowing that you and your seed was sleeping in the car tonight. Look at it as you helping me out.”
She laughed.
“See, you laugh. We would still be going back and forth in the snow if your son didn’t say he was cold. I could tell you love and value your son; you’re not going to hear no judgment from me.”
“Thank you.” Was all she said. “I can pay you back when I get paid.”
“I told you, I don’t want no money from you. All I want is for you and your son to get a good night’s sleep.”
“Okay. We’ll be out your hair in the morning.”
“We’ll talk and sort this shit out in the morning. Sit back and enjoy the heat, ight?”
“Thank you.”
“You don’t have to keep thanking me. My grandmother would put me over her knee if she knew I walked away from you tonight.”
“Her knee? I highly doubt that.”
“Oh, you ain’t never meet my grandmother then,” I shot back.
“Grandmothers.”
“Yeah, but I wouldn’t be who I am if it wasn’t for mine.”
“Mine raised me to be this smart mouth woman who didn’t take nonsense from no man. Somehow along the journey, I lost myself.”
“People never lose themselves; they hide themselves. Don’t know your story, but whoever you were with had you hiding. You never lost yourself.”
“That makes sense.”
“It does.”
We arrived at my building, and I pulled into the parking garage and into the reserved spot. I hadn’t been to this crib in over a month. The housekeeper came every week and refilled the fridge with fresh food like clockwork. Although I hadn’t been here in a month, she never knew when I was gonna pop up and stay in the city versus my crib in Jersey. She tried to grab her son and I stopped her. Picking him up, I carried him to the elevator and used my key card to access the elevator. She watched as I pressed the 10th floor and sat staring around the elevator. The door chimed when it made it to my floor. We walked down the hall and I let us into my condo. It wasn’t something all crazy. It was a two-bedroom condo with two bathrooms with views of a tree-lined street with brownstones. The shit cost an arm and a leg, yet it was quiet and not in the middle of everything, so I bought it.
“This is beautiful. It doesn’t even look lived in.”
“Don’t really stay here. I come here once in a blue, but make yourself at home. There’s food in the fridge, cable, and wifi. The bedrooms and bathrooms are down that way. The washer and dryer are in that closet.” I gave her a quick tour while holding her son. “Come,” I called her to follow me.
I placed her son down on the king size bed in the guest bedroom. She watched and then came and took his
coat off and put him under the covers to warm up. Kissing him on the forehead, she followed me out the room.
“I really appreciate you doing this for me. I don’t know how to thank you for this.”
“Shorty, you don’t need to keep thanking me. Get some sleep and we’ll talk in the morning. I’ll have my guy come out and look at your whip too.”
“Okay,” she quietly replied and walked me to the door. “It’s coming down really bad out there… I don’t want anything to happen to you driving in this. You should stay, I mean it’s your home.”
“I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable. I’m good; I’ll make it to the crib.”
“No, I’m fine. With you, I don’t feel that feeling I usually feel when something is off. Can you stay, I would feel like shit if you had to drive in this.” she walked over to the huge floor to ceiling windows and pointed to the snow. It was barely visible out there and she was right. Trying to drive to Jersey in this would be a nightmare.
“Ight, I’ll stay. I’m gonna be in the bedroom down the hall, if you need anything, let me know.” I took my coat off and sat it on the stool in the kitchen. “Try and get some sleep.”
“I’ll try,” she replied as I made my way down the hall.
A nigga was thirty-eight, which meant I wasn’t a spring chicken. I had to get me ten hours of sleep or else the next day would be hell. I took vitamins, exercised and ate right when I could. All that no sleeping hood nigga shit wasn’t for me. I was one of those hood niggas that needed sleep to function. Closing the door behind myself, I went into the adjourning bathroom and ran a shower. After, I planned on jumping in bed and sleeping until my Pit Pat called to make sure I was alright.
“My son was hungry, so I made some pancakes, eggs, and bacon,” she explained soon as she saw me walk into the kitchen.
The little boy sat at the counter stuffing food into his mouth. It was crazy that this woman was sitting in my crib making breakfast and I didn’t know her name, and she didn’t know mine. She held a plate up and placed it down on the empty spot on the kitchen island.