by Jahquel J
“Yep, five.”
“Can you move them away from lunch? I want to take lunch today.” When I requested her to remove my appointments from lunch, her eyes narrowed in on me, and she stared at me until I finally broke and told her.
“Denim wants to take me to lunch. What?”
“I told you that you’re messing with fire, Hazel. That man wants you, and you know it, but want to keep playing games. You can’t play tit for tat with Yolani, with this man’s heart.”
“I hear you, Mo. All I’m trying to do is have lunch and reconnect with a friend. Why is it so wrong for me to go out and enjoy someone else’s company, but Yolani is free to do whatever she wants?”
“Because I know that’s not what you’re about. If Yolani was doing everything she was supposed to, you wouldn’t be worried about Denim. He could have called you and you would have had his number blocked the next time he tried to call you. Two wrongs don’t make a right.”
“They don’t? I could of sworn they did.” Mo rolled her eyes and stood up with her hand on her hip.
“I’m not going to deal with you today. I got actual work that needs to be done, and you playing around. I’ll move your appointments around, so you can go to your little lunch.”
“That’s all I ask. Thank you!” I smirked as she closed the door behind me.
Two wrongs didn’t make a right and I completely understood that. Still, while Yolani was out doing what she wanted, I was the only one in our marriage. It was a lonely feeling when the person you were supposed to be with, played you off to go run the streets. The infidelity wasn’t something I witnessed with my own eyes. The rumors were enough for me to accuse her and when I did she would get upset and yell about how I stay listening to bitches. Any bitch that decided to come to me as a woman, was going to have me come to them like a doctor, ‘cause they were going to be a patient in somebody’s hospital. It was bad enough that I had tried to calm down from my craziness. Yoshon had to continue to tell me that every situation didn’t need a reaction from me, and he was right. Bitches wanted to be in my place and would kill to be Yolani’s wife. They saw the cars, house, nail shop and the fact that I had any and everything that came out, and they wanted it. If only they were able to see the lonely nights, miscommunication, verbal disrespect and the constant begging I did to be a priority in Yolani’s wife. If they saw all of that, the designer shoes and foreign cars wouldn’t be all that appealing then.
“What are you doing here?” I gasped when Denim walked through the doors of YoYo’s. He smiled and came over and wrapped me in a huge hug.
His hugs were everything and the way he swooped me up and then kissed the crook of my neck made me want to melt into his arms. “You dubbed my call for lunch, so I’m gonna take you out for dinner tonight.”
“Dinner? You know what happened last time we had dinner,” I pulled him into my office as I whispered.
We had a few people getting their nails finished that were staring and whispering. I didn’t need everybody in my damn business. “We were super busy today. I tried to move some appointments around, but they weren’t having it today. Business comes first,” I explained.
He walked up to me and stood in front of me, blocking any chance of me slipping away from him. Sitting on the edge of my desk, I stared up into his eyes. Everything that Mo had said to me ran through my mind. Denim wasn’t playing, and he wanted this.
“I know what happened last time, and I want it to keep happening. You got plans or something?” He snuck a kiss on my lips and I allowed him to. It felt so good to be loved on and feel wanted. I just wanted to soak all his attention up and bottle it up for later.
“I didn’t have any plans as of yet. The night is still young.”
“Nah, you had plans now. You know the hotel I’m staying in.” He pecked me on the lips and then headed out of my office.
“What if I—”
“Not trying to hear none of that today. Go home and handle whatever you gotta do with your wifey, and then I’ll see you at my hotel room.” I wanted to ask why we were going to a hotel when he had a condo we could go to. Instead, I kept my mouth shut and smiled as he closed the door behind him.
Thankfully, Mo had left for the day. If she was here, she would have had a mouth full, and I didn’t need that right now. The devil was talking to me on my shoulder and he was telling me to do what I wanted. The angel on my shoulder was somewhere tied up with tape because she wasn’t speaking to me, and I didn’t need her input right about now. When I came out of my office, the two nail techs were finishing up their clients. Eisha was sitting at her station on the phone. It didn’t matter how early or late I needed her to be here; she would be here. Along with being talented with her skill, she was also loyal and just wanted to do her work and go home at the end of the day. Unlike other shops, there weren’t drama between my girls. They all got along, kept personal business out the shop and did what they had to do.
“I’m gone… lock up the shop when these ladies are done,” I told her and passed the shop’s keys to her. “I know you have two early clients, so you’ll need to open too.”
“Thanks, Haze. See you tomorrow.” She smiled and then continued with her conversation. Since I owned the shop, I was able to park right out front. Sliding into my car, I started the engine and headed toward home. All I wanted was a shower and then a second to think about if I was going to take Denim up on his offer.
Soon as I walked through the door, I was annoyed. Yolani’s shoes were all over the foyer and I could spot three pairs of pants laid out on the stairs. She always complained that we needed to bring the huge mirror in our living room, upstairs, so she would get dress downstairs, so she could stare at herself in the mirror. Sighing, I kicked her shoes to the side and made my way into the kitchen where I heard her on the phone – as always. When she saw me, she gave me a simple head nod. A head nod like I was another one of her workers in the streets, not her wife. This was how my wife greeted me after not seeing or hearing from me all day.
“What’s all of this? You’re gonna clean all of this up, right?” she waved at me to shut my mouth and the continued conducting business. Looking around, I know she didn’t shush me in my own damn house. “Have you fucking lost your mind?”
Her eyes widened, and she huffed as she rushed off the phone. “Why the fuck you gotta come in here yelling and shit? I’ve been trying to hook up with this nigga and his team for months. He finally had time to chat and you come in being loud as fuck while popping those damn gums!” she hollered at me.
“I don’t give a damn about who you’ve been trying to fucking hook up with. You got my house with your shoes and clothes all over the damn place. Then, you got dishes in the sink with the ketchup sitting out on the counter with dried ketchup around it. If that isn’t the worst of it, you gonna nod your head like I’m some nigga in the streets!” I slammed my hands down on the counter as she stared blankly at me.
It was a look she always gave me, and I couldn’t place my finger on it. She always seemed to be spaced out and not paying attention to me. It was as if her body was in front of me, but her soul was elsewhere. Snapping out of it, she sniffled and went into the fridge, ignoring everything I said.
“I’m out. You always trying to bitch about something. When the fuck do I come home to something cooked and my wife not nagging? The fuck.”
“You deadass right now? Yolani Santana, you don’t ever come the fuck home for me to do any of that. Like now, you’re leaving.” She tried to walk past me, and I shoved her. I watched her stumble back a few inches and then suck her teeth. “No!” I screamed.
“You deadass, Haze?” Stop acting like a little ass girl.” She shoved me hard. I stumbled back and regained my balance and ran to the front door.
“You’re not leaving until you talk to me! Leaving every time we argue isn’t going to solve anything!” I hollered.
Tears were forming, and I was upset. Marriages weren’t easy and they took time, still, people
made it work. Yolani made time for shit she wanted to do, and I or our marriage wasn’t what she wanted to do.
“Move the fuck out my face before I punch you in your shit!” she sneered and yanked me away from the door and tossed me onto the floor.
Her actions had me so stunned that I didn’t move from under the foyer table. I sat there shocked that she had handled me that way and then continued to walk out the door, not bothering to check on me. Instead, I was met with the loud slam of our front door. A few seconds later, I heard her screech out of our driveway. Breaking down, I pulled my legs close to my chest and sobbed. How did things get so bad? Why didn’t she want to work on this like I did? If she didn’t make it clear before, Yolani made it crystal clear that she didn’t want to have anything to do with me or our marriage. The pain of being rejected by someone you loved hurt physically. People didn’t understand the pain of heartbreak. It felt like someone was gripping your heart so tight that you couldn’t eat, sleep or think without wanting to break down. My chest felt tight and I felt like I was going to pass out.
Picking myself up on the floor, I grabbed my purse and keys from the counter in the kitchen and locked up behind myself. With tears streaming down my eyes and snot coming out my nose, I dialed Denim’s number and he answered almost immediately.
“Can I see you?” I sobbed into the phone.
“Yo, what’s wrong with you?”
“I just need to see you,” I wailed as I tossed my purse into my car and slammed the door after I got in.
“Yeah, come to my crib. I’m texting you the address now. Hurry up too,” he told me and we ended the call.
Making the drive to Denim’s house was long and painful. Being in the car with my thoughts drove me up the wall. How could she do me like I was nothing? Yolani acted as if she didn’t know me and I was some stranger she was pushing around. My blood boiled, my heart ached, and my feelings were all over the place. Why me? Why us? My parents tried to warn me that just because we were good friends didn’t mean we would be good in a relationship. When the words left my mother’s mouth, I knew she was hating. Me and Yolani completed each other’s sentences, how wouldn’t we work in a relationship. The saying a hard head makes a soft ass was ringing true right about now.
When I made it to Denim’s condo, he was waiting downstairs for me. I parked in the guest parking spot and he whisked me upstairs. Snot and tears invaded my face as people in the building stared at me, confused. If they only knew, I felt like my entire life had just ended and couldn’t be fixed. Yolani was tough and she rarely showed emotion. It was part of the reason I fell for her. As a friend, I was able to always break down that wall and get her to reveal her feelings to me. When we got into a relationship, it’s like she worked double time to keep that wall up and prevent from me tearing it down. I understood she had been through a lot and some stuff wasn’t as easy to get over, but to push me out the way she did, hurt me to my core.
“What happened? She put her hands on you?” Denim questioned as he held my arms and bent down to stare me in the eyes.
“No,” I lied. She did put her hands on me when she tossed me onto the floor like a rag doll. Denim didn’t know that much, so I kept it to myself. My feelings were more hurt than my knees and hands when I hit the floor.
“Ma, come on, so I can get you some tissue. What happened that she got you out here with snot and shit all over your face? This isn’t the Hazel that I know.” He lifted me up and sat on his kitchen counter.
“The Hazel you knew was overrated,” I mumbled and messed around with my jeans. The Hazel he knew would have took her ass to California and got everything she wanted. She would have been married with that little cute girl he called his daughter as her own.
“Stop,” he told me and handed me the wet napkin. “What are you really doing, Haze? Shorty got you crying and shit, for what?”
“I’m married to her, Denim. You don’t understand because you’re not married. It’s more than just up and leaving her.”
“Word? So, you want to sit and fix this shit with her? Let me know, because I don’t need to be wasting my time. If you gonna choose her again, let me know so I can work on mending my heart now.”
“No, it’s… it’s not what I’m saying, Dem. You’re putting everything on me right now and I don’t know anything!” I screamed, and tears came down my face. I cried and cried hard.
Denim dropped his shoulders and pulled me to his chest while I cried. “My bad. I don’t mean to make this shit hard on you. I apologize, Hazel,” he whispered in my ear and kissed me on the ear.
“I just want to be happy.” He listened to me sob into his chest.
He pulled me away from his chest and kissed me on the lips. Our tongues danced around in each other’s mouth before he broke our kiss. “That’s something you have to do. It’s not something me or Yolani can give you. Yeah, I know I can make you happy, but that shit starts from you first.”
“Fuck me, Dem,” I demanded. My mind was all over and all I wanted to do was fuck. I wanted him to pull my hair and spank me from behind.
“Not like this.” He kissed me on the lips and left the kitchen.
Jumping down from the counter, I followed him into his bedroom. He had just sat down on his bed, and I jumped between his legs and unbuckled his jeans and belt. Pulling his dick out, it was hard as 11th grade math. My mouth watered at the sight of how pretty his dick was. Bending down, I placed my entire mouth over his dick and made it touch the back of my throat. His grip on my hair let me know I was doing my job right. Gagging, I spit on his dick and shoved it back down my throat with force, and he whimpered. Just because Yolani didn’t have a dick didn’t mean my head game wasn’t something serious. When he was on the verge of cumming, he pulled me up and snatched my jeans down. Bending me over the bed, he shoved all his dick into me with force. Gasping, I leaned over and made my ass clap as he held me tight around my waist.
“Uhh, right there, harder!” I screamed and the more I screamed, the harder he fucked me.
Grabbing a hold of my hair, he pulled my head back. “Tell me how much you want it,” he demanded.
“I want it baaaaddddd, baby,” I cried out.
The way he was working this curved dick, it was hitting parts of my walls I never knew existed. He pulled out, slapped it on my ass and then slammed it right back inside of me. My lip quivered, the dick was so damn good. Shaking my ass, I pushed it back on him, and he dug his nails into my waist as he pumped harder and harder. When he pulled it out again and slammed it back in, I creamed all over him. Denim was far from done, because he flipped me over and entered me from the front while staring into my eyes.
“You know I still love the shit out of you,” he told me and then came. I wrapped my legs around him and planted a kiss on him. We stayed in that position and kissed while being in each other’s arms. It felt good to feel wanted and appreciated. When I stared into Denim’s eyes, I knew he wanted and loved me. In fact, he never stopped. The last thing I wanted was to break his heart. I was scared to lose love, but even more scared of starting over it again.
11
Yolani
“How the hell did you get into my apartment?” Cherry questioned as she sat her grocery bags down on the kitchen table. “And why do you have all this coke scattered everywhere?” she continued with that nagging shit that I couldn’t stand.
“Instead of you fucking beefing soon as you walk through the door, how about you greet me, bitch?” I responded and continued to sprinkle the coke onto my blunts. My nose was raw as fuck from sniffing, so I was trying to find other ways to get my high. A nigga wasn’t about to be smoking no damn crack, so this was the next option besides snorting.
Hazel had me fucked up when she came into the crib from work. She fucked a call for me and then she came in screaming about dumb shit. All she had to do was clean the shit up when I left. Instead she wanna get all fucking childish and put her hands on me. The way I swung her, I didn’t mean to do that shit. Haz
el knew how to push buttons that weren’t meant to be pushed. When she stood in front of the door, I blacked. All I saw was her laying on the floor when I realized what I did. Yeah, I should have stayed and helped her off the floor. With how mad I was feeling, it was best for me to leave before shit go worst. It wasn’t no secret that I had a hand problem, and it was something I promised myself I would never do to Hazel. I would never be able to forgive myself if I laid hands on her.
“What the fuck?” I jumped up when Cherry flipped her entire kitchen table over. The table was glass and shattered soon as it hit the floor.
“I’m tired of you coming when you and your bitch get into a fight. When you’re good with her, you don’t come the fuck around here. I’m also tired of you fucking coming here to be a fucking junkie. Bitch, go and use a damn trap house, this isn’t one of them!” she yelled as she slammed shit around.
Coke was all over the floor along with weed and my roll up. First, Hazel came home with her shit, and I got away from there without putting hands on her, but Cherry was about to catch all the anger I got handed today. Staring at her, she continued to go on and on about what I didn’t do for her, and how I was only around when I needed her. There was no lie and she was speaking the truth. Cherry was there when I was going through it with Hazel. It had been a minute since me and Hazel been on the same page, so I frequented her house, handled business from here and acted like it was my second crib. Why go out and get another crib when I could lay up here without having to do much. At first, Cherry was so damn excited to have me in her crib that I got home cooked meals damn near every night. Then, it stopped, and the bitching and moaning came after. She cried about not going out or how I didn’t claim her when I saw her out in the hood. Why the fuck would I? She knew when I stepped to her that I was spoken for, and she continued to pursue me. Why did bitches think they could persuade you to leave your woman for them? Bitch, the whole reason I entertained fucking with you is because I needed someone to do my laundry when I went MIA on Hazel. I was trying to have a peaceful space to come and chill, not hear the same shit I could hear at home.