by Cathy Glass
Leaving the hall, I jogged up the stairs and to the spare bedroom to make some last-minute changes so that it was suitable for when Jade arrived and she felt comfortable. I didn’t think she’d mind the soft toys dotted around the room, but I removed the toy box. Then I changed the duvet cover and pillowcase, replacing the pictures of Batman with plain pale yellow. Satisfied the room was clean and welcoming, I returned downstairs. As a foster carer and an individual I try not to be judgemental, and if I thought Jade was far too young to be having a baby and that she should have been more careful I didn’t dwell on it. Who knew what past experience had brought Jade to this point in her life and self-righteous recrimination is never helpful. My role was to look after Jade and her unborn baby, which I intended to do to the best of my ability, and if she left me feeling less alone and better able to face the world then I would be delighted.
Jill telephoned again two hours later, by which time I had vacuumed the carpets, dusted the shelves, tidied the house and begun the preparation of the spaghetti bolognese for dinner. Although it was only lunchtime, I knew from experience that when a new child arrives time evaporates; I’d been caught out before by suddenly finding it was seven o’clock and no dinner was ready. Now, having been fostering for eleven years, I was better prepared. However, the only news Jill had was that she didn’t know when Jade would be arriving, as Rachel hadn’t been able to contact her. Apparently Jade wasn’t in school and Meryl didn’t know where she was.
‘I’ll phone as soon as I know more,’ Jill said.
Such uncertainty isn’t unusual in fostering, so I wasn’t fazed. Plans change and I knew enough about teenagers to know that their timekeeping was fluid and their appointment keeping variable.
As the afternoon was cold but bright I put the washing on the line to dry, and then with some time to spare I began a new fostering folder in preparation for Jade’s arrival. In this would go the forms the social worker would bring with her, as well as the daily record all foster carers have to keep of the child they are looking after. This includes medical, education and social-care appointments, any significant events, details of contact and the child’s general disposition. This record keeping allows the child’s progress to be monitored so that additional help can be accessed if necessary. The notes are confidential and when the child leaves the foster carer they are placed on the child’s file at the social services. Even though Jade would be with me for only a short while I had to start a file, although I couldn’t include much at present other than her name, age and today’s date. More information would follow with the social worker when she placed Jade.
Having heard no more from Jill that afternoon, I left the house at 3.00 to collect Paula from school. Adrian, as normal, would make his own way home from secondary school; usually he walked with his friends. I knew I needed to prepare both children for Jade’s arrival. Although they were used to children suddenly appearing and starting to live with us, a heavily pregnant teenager was something different – as new to them as it was for me.
I took the opportunity to talk to Paula on the way home. Once she’d finished telling me her news from her day at school, I said: ‘Jill phoned today and she’s asked us if we can look after a teenage girl for about a month.’
‘Good, I’m pleased we’re having a girl,’ Paula said. She always preferred fostering girls so that she had someone to play with, while Adrian preferred boys for the same reason, although in the end they usually all played together, and of course we had no choice as to which sex the child would be: it was matter of which child needed a foster home.
‘Yes, a big girl,’ I said. ‘She’s seventeen.’
‘Will she still want to play with me?’ Paula asked.
‘I am sure she will sometimes, although she’ll need a lot of rest. She’s expecting a baby.’
Paula went quiet for a moment and I could almost hear her thought processes ticking. I would wait for her next question rather than rush in.
‘Is the daddy coming to live with us too?’ Paula asked. Aged eight, Paula knew that babies had daddies, although they didn’t always live with their child.
‘No. It will just be Jade,’ I confirmed.
‘And the baby is still in her tummy?’
‘Yes. That’s right.’
‘Will it come out while she’s living with us?’ Paula asked, pulling a face. She also knew where babies came from and that giving birth was a messy business, from seeing baby rabbits being born.
‘No. Jade will leave us before the baby is born,’ I said. ‘Although there’s nothing to be squeamish about. Giving birth is perfectly natural.’
‘I’d rather be a bird and lay eggs,’ Paula said.
I smiled. ‘And have to build a nest each year? And then sit on the eggs until they hatch?’
Paula laughed and then fell silent again. I could see she was thinking again. ‘Do teenagers normally have babies?’ she asked. ‘Our teacher said you had to be an adult.’
‘It’s best to be an adult,’ I said, ‘although a teenager can have a baby. But it’s a big responsibility, so it’s much better to wait until you are older and have a nice home and a husband to help you.’ It might have sounded as though I was lecturing Paula, but I thought it was important she knew what was generally considered the better option. Paula was young and impressionable and looked up to older girls. I didn’t want her using Jade as a role model; pregnant at seventeen with nowhere to live – what mother would?
We’d just got home when the telephone rang. It was Jill. She said that Jade had been found and was now with her social worker, Rachel, and they would be with us at about five o’clock. Jill also said she was aiming to be with us just before then. As my support social worker, whenever possible she was present when a child was placed – to check the paperwork and that I had everything I needed to look after the child, and generally to be supportive and give advice where necessary.
Adrian arrived home at 4.30, and as he helped himself to a glass of milk and a banana I quickly brought him up to date.
‘Is that the girl that teacher wanted us to have?’ he asked. After Meryl had left the evening before, Adrian and Paula had asked what she’d wanted and I’d briefly told them.
‘Yes, the same one,’ I said. ‘Meryl – the teacher – phoned the social services first thing this morning. I’ve said we’ll look after Jade just for a month, until they’ve found her somewhere else to live.’
Adrian nodded and, having finished his snack, went off to play with his Nintendo in his room, which was far more interesting than a teenage girl coming to stay. Paula watched some children’s television. Then at 4.50 the doorbell rang and it was Jill. Paula knew we would need the sitting room and scampered off upstairs to play – either with Adrian or in her own room. Jill called hi to her and then came with me into the kitchen while I made her a cup of coffee.
Jill didn’t have any more details about Jade, so we’d have to wait until Rachel arrived with Jade. We went through to the sitting room with the coffee and Jill commented that snow was forecast, and also that it was good of Meryl to take such an interest in Jade. I agreed, although I didn’t tell Jill that Meryl’s interest was partly due to her having experienced something similar, as I thought she’d told me that in confidence.
At just gone 5.00 the doorbell rang and, feeling a little nervous and apprehensive, I left the sitting room and went down the hall to answer it. As I opened the front door the cold air rushed in.
‘Hello.’ I smiled. ‘I’m Cathy.’
‘Hello, I’m Rachel,’ the social worker said, shaking my hand and stepping into the hall first. ‘This is Jade, and this is Tyler, Jade’s boyfriend.’
‘It’s nice to meet you.’ I smiled again. Then, without thinking, I added to Tyler: ‘I wasn’t expecting you.’
‘No, nether was I,’ Rachel said pointedly.
‘I wanted him here,’ Jade put in a little grumpily.
‘OK,’ I said. ‘Welcome.’
‘He’ll just b
e here for a short while,’ Rachel said. ‘So he knows Jade is all right, and then he’ll be leaving.’
Tyler looked about aged twelve and beside Jade looked more like her son than boyfriend. Not only was she taller than him by a good two inches, but she was also about twice his width and matronly. I thought she’d probably been a bit overweight before her pregnancy but now with her stomach distended she was certainly a big girl and, to use a saying, looked as though she could have eaten him for dinner. She was plain but not unattractive, with chin-length brown hair. She was dressed in black leggings and a long jumper, which was stretched tightly over her bump.
Tyler was carrying a zipped holdall, which I assumed contained Jade’s belongings, and I suggested he left it in the hall. I then showed the three of them through to the sitting room, where Jill stood to greet them. I asked Rachel, Jade and Tyler if they would like something to drink but they didn’t want anything. Jade and Tyler sat close together at one end of the sofa and Rachel sat at the other, while Jill and I took the single chairs. Rachel was tall and slender and I guessed in her late twenties. She had a pleasant manner, warm and vibrant, although I thought she could be firm when necessary.
‘Thank you for agreeing to take Jade,’ Rachel said, removing a wodge of papers from her large bag-cum-briefcase. ‘She’s promised me she’s going to behave herself.’ Which suggested she might not have behaved herself in the past.
I smiled at Jade. She linked her arm through Tyler’s but didn’t smile back and concentrated on the carpet.
‘I’m pleased to be able to help,’ I said brightly. ‘I’m sure Jade and I will get along fine. I’m looking forward to having a teenager in the house.’
Tyler glanced at me, while Jade continued staring at the carpet.
‘Everything you need should be in here,’ Rachel said, passing a set of paperwork to me and then another to Jill. ‘Essential information and consent form – for the fostering. I’ve run through the contents with Jade and at her age she’ll sign the consent as well.’
I nodded and quickly flicked through the papers, which included the contact details of the social services; Jade’s mother’s address, which Jade had given as her permanent home; the names and dates of birth of Jade’s siblings; and the names and date of birth of the baby’s father, from which I quickly calculated Tyler to be only sixteen. Jill was also glancing through the paperwork.
‘Cathy,’ Rachel said after a moment, ‘I would like you to make sure Jade attends her antenatal appointments. She’s missed some in the past and they are important.’
‘Absolutely,’ I said. ‘When is the next one due?’
‘Next week,’ Rachel said. ‘She attends the Lakeview Health Centre for her antenatal care.’
‘I want Tyler to come too,’ Jade said, finally raising her eyes from the floor to look at Rachel.
‘That’s fine,’ Rachel said, ‘as long as he doesn’t miss school. You’ve got exams this year, haven’t you?’
Tyler shrugged. ‘Maybe. Dunno. I’m leaving school as soon as I can.’
‘When exactly is the appointment?’ Jill now asked.
‘Jade has the appointment card in her bag,’ Rachel said.
‘It’s in the hall. I’ll get it later,’ Jade said.
‘Make sure you tell Cathy the date in plenty of time,’ Jill said to Jade. ‘Cathy has two children and she has to work around their commitments too.’
Jade nodded sullenly, but I appreciated she had a lot to cope with and how difficult all this must be for her.
‘Jade has some of her clothes with her,’ Rachel said, moving on, ‘enough for tonight and a couple of days, but she’s hoping to collect some more of her belongings from home tomorrow. Aren’t you, Jade?’
Jade nodded.
‘Jade won’t be attending school any more,’ Rachel continued, looking at me, ‘so perhaps the two of you could go to her home tomorrow and pick up her things? Jade has a front door key if no one is in.’
‘That’s fine with me,’ I said. ‘We’ll go in my car.’
‘Will Jade’s mother be home?’ Jill asked, mindful that some parents are angry towards the foster carer when their child is taken into care.
Rachel looked at Jade, who shrugged. ‘Dunno,’ she said.
‘Jade’s mother works part time,’ Rachel said. ‘But she’s all right with me, so there shouldn’t be a problem meeting you. She’s happy for Jade to visit whenever she wants to.’
‘Are you comfortable going?’ Jill asked me.
‘Yes,’ I said. I was usually able to work with the parents whose children I fostered. However, I was becoming increasingly aware of just how different it was going to be fostering a teenager compared to a younger child; for example, children in care normally only see their parents at supervised contact, whereas Jade could go and see her mother any time. Another reminder followed quickly, as Rachel said: ‘I’ve told Jade that this placement is for her only. She can see Tyler but he is not to stay here overnight.’
Chapter Three
Awkward
‘So where can he sleep?’ Jade asked, somewhat disgruntled.
‘My mum says if I’m not staying at your place I have to go home,’ Tyler said.
‘Very sensible,’ Rachel said. ‘That solves the problem.’ Then, addressing Jill and me, Rachel explained: ‘Tyler has been sleeping at Jade’s house for some time but it was very overcrowded.’
‘No it wasn’t,’ Jade said. ‘He slept with me – in my room.’
Jill and I exchanged a glance, for it would appear that Jade’s mother had actively encouraged her seventeen-year-old daughter to sleep with her sixteen-year-old boyfriend and now she was pregnant had thrown her out.
Rachel didn’t respond to Jade’s comment but continued with the paperwork, checking through her copy and pointing out details that were relevant to me looking after Jade, while Jill and I followed on our copies. I read that Jade was the eldest of five children and she and the two elder siblings had the same surname, while the younger two had a different surname. Jade’s mother’s date of birth made her thirty-five, so she must have been eighteen when she’d had Jade. Jade’s father’s name and date of birth were given – he was the same age as Jade’s mother – but he didn’t live with Jade’s mother, and there was no contact address for him. In the section headed ‘health of young person’ it stated that Jade was pregnant – approximately thirty weeks – and her emotional and developmental health was age appropriate. Under ‘education’ it showed that Jade had gained six GCSEs the summer before and that she was part way through an A-level course, which she hoped to continue after her baby was born.
‘You mentioned that Jade might be receiving some home tuition,’ Jill asked Rachel.
‘We’ve decided to leave it until after the baby is born,’ Rachel said. ‘Jade felt she wouldn’t be able to concentrate at present with everything else.’ Which I fully appreciated, although I wondered how she would be able to concentrate on studying with a young baby to look after. ‘Perhaps you could teach Jade some home-care skills?’ Rachel asked me. ‘Basic cooking, for example, to help prepare her for when she lives independently.’
‘Yes, I’d be pleased to,’ I said, again smiling at Jade.
‘I can cook already,’ Jade said a little dourly.
‘Great. You can help me, then,’ I said lightly, throwing her another smile.
Rachel ran through the rest of the forms and then the four of us signed the last page, which formed the contract: Jade was signing to give her consent to being in care, Rachel signed as the social worker responsible, Jill signed as the representative of the fostering agency and my support social worker, and I signed to agree to the terms of looking after Jade. If I wanted to end a placement early I had to give the social services and Homefinders twenty-eight days’ notice in writing, but that hadn’t happened yet.
‘So what are you going to do this evening, then?’ Rachel asked Jade as she packed away her copy of the papers.
Jade shrugged
.
‘We’ll be having dinner soon,’ I said, for I noticed it was nearly half past six.
‘That sounds good,’ Rachel said. ‘What are you going to have?’
‘Spaghetti bolognese,’ I replied.
‘Lovely. I expect you’re hungry,’ Rachel said to Jade as she closed her briefcase.
Jade shrugged. ‘Can Ty stay for dinner?’
‘That will be up to Cathy,’ Rachel said decisively.
Jade and Tyler now looked at me expectantly. ‘Yes, there’s plenty,’ I said.
‘Excellent. What time does your mother want you home?’ Rachel asked Tyler. The contrast between the man (who’d created a baby and was shortly to be a father) and the boy (whose mother wanted him home at a set time) was not lost on Jill and I saw the briefest of smiles flicker across her face.
‘After dinner, I guess,’ Tyler said easily.
‘I think we should set a time for Tyler to leave,’ Jill said. Tyler was settled so comfortably on my sofa that he looked as though he was there for the night. ‘What time do you think is reasonable?’ Jill asked.
While I wanted Jade to feel welcome in what would be her home for the next month, I thought that it could be quite disruptive to the household routine and to Adrian and Paula if Tyler was here every evening until late. ‘I have to see to my daughter, Paula,’ I said. ‘And Adrian has homework to do, so is eight o’clock on a weekday all right? Later at weekends.’