by Aly Martinez
He shook his head. “Me. It’s all just me. I didn’t show you who I wanted you to see to seduce you, Cora. If you recall, the only seducing I did was begging you to stay away from me for fear that we would find ourselves sitting right here, right now.”
“So it’s my fault.”
“No. Not at all. I just mean I didn’t have to pretend with you. Yes, I omitted a lot of stuff about my past and even lied to you about my motives. But every smile. Every laugh. Every kiss. Every touch. That was me. That was us. And that was the truth.”
“Maybe. But that’s the thing about lies, Penn. They taint the truth until you have no idea what to believe.”
A vise in my chest cranked down until I thought my ribs would break. I knew for a fact that crawling into his lap and feeling his strong hands gliding up and down my back would ease it. But what I wanted and what I would allow myself to get sucked into again were two different stories. He’d said that he wanted to protect me. But in the process, he broke me in ways that Dante, Marcos, or even Thomas never could. There wasn’t enough of me left to take that chance again.
“I believe you. I think you did have my best interest at heart, but I also think you highly underestimated who I am as a person. All I know for sure right now is that, despite that your heart is beating, Penn Walker died in that fire. And you need to accept that we aren’t just falling back into us. I have to figure out for myself how much of the man I loved is left inside this Shane guy, but it’s going to take time.” I got to my feet and walked over to him, extending a hand down to help him up. “Time that is going to have to wait. After tonight, there is a storm brewing around us. We all need to sit down and figure out what to do about Thomas. There are three girls out there who have been through some pretty traumatic stuff. Our problems don’t matter until we make theirs disappear.”
He stared up at me, his blue eyes locked on mine. “You don’t have to worry about Thomas.”
I scoffed. “That might be the biggest lie you’ve ever told me.”
He took my hand and pulled himself up. When he got to his feet, he gave me a sharp tug, sending me stumbling into his chest. I didn’t have a chance to react before his arm snaked around me, dragging me closer until our bodies became flush, head to toe.
My breathing sped as his warmth encompassed me, driving out the chill that settled in my bones since he’d been gone. His chest moved with mine, rising and falling in a synchronized dance as though even our exhales desired each other. He dipped his head, the hairs on his jaw tickling my cheek, eliciting countless memories of his face scrubbing mine as he surged inside me, our bodies fevered and frenzied.
Better judgment told me to back away. I’d asked for time. Thirty seconds wasn’t what I’d meant.
But then his breath flittered across my skin, causing a wave of chills to wash over me as he said, “This thing between us was never about truths or lies. We both felt it before the first word had ever been spoken. That day in your bathroom when you grabbed my arm, begging me not to expose Savannah, you might as well have crawled inside me and recoded my DNA, because two seconds later, my life started all over again. You felt it then.” He gave me a pointed squeeze. “And I know you feel it now. So take all the time you need, baby. But consider this fair warning: Penn Walker didn’t die. I’m very much alive and coming for you.”
I gasped when his lips touched just below my ear, igniting sparks inside me.
And then all too soon, he released me and started toward the bedroom door. “I need to make sure Drew got back.”
I blinked. Like a million times.
What the hell was happening?
I’d known Penn’s wife.
She’d told him about me.
His name was Shane.
Drew wasn’t his brother.
Thomas had killed Lexy.
Penn was going to kill him.
He’d already killed Dante and Marcos.
Savannah was back.
So was Catalina.
Thomas had tried to shoot her.
And Penn was alive…and coming for me.
What the hell was going on?
“Did you have dinner?” Penn asked, swinging the door open.
I did another round of the blinks.
“Right,” he mumbled. “Let me see if I can find a delivery place that’s still open. Any preference?”
“Yes. One that can deliver me a new life.”
He winked. “I’ll see what I can do.” He tilted his head toward the door. “You coming?”
I wanted to say no. I wanted to lock that door and crash into his bed, which was probably bajillionaire comfortable and smelled like him. I wanted to sleep for a month and hopefully wake up in a world that made sense. But River was out there, more than likely worried sick. And Savannah was out there, healthy and smiling. And if my memory served me correctly, she was wearing pajamas that actually made her look her age and not twenty-six. That alone was a miracle far bigger than Penn coming back from the dead.
And with all of that in mind, I put one foot in front of the other and said, “Yeah. I’m coming.”
He stood at the door, holding it open until I walked through it, at which point he proved that he had no concept of time whatsoever because he placed his hands on the small of my back.
At which point my body followed suit, proving that it had no desire for time, by arching into it. Dammit!
“Oh, thank God, you’re back,” Penn said as he ushered me into the open living area.
Drew was sitting on a barstool while Catalina hovered over him, putting a bandage over his left eye. I caught sight of Savannah, Isabel, and River huddled together on one of the brown overstuffed leather couches, and when all of their heads turned our way, I shot them a reassuring smile. Isabel and Savannah returned it, but River was too busy watching Penn as though she were waiting for him to disappear. God, how long could I delay telling her that Lexy was actually Penn’s wife? She was going to be crushed, and after the last few weeks, guilt was not something else I wanted to add to her plate.
“Is everything…okay?” Drew asked, flicking his gaze between me and Penn.
Penn walked straight to the fridge. “Yeah. Cora needs time. I don’t. We’ll be fine.”
I shot him a glare that I hope singed his chest hair.
His response was to lift a beer in my direction. “Drink?”
I could use a drink. Dammit squared.
After stomping over, I snatched the open bottle from his hand. “The jury is still out on whether we’ll be fine, Shane.”
“Penn,” he corrected. “And we’ll be fine, Cora.” He twisted the top off his bottle, clinked it with mine, and then tipped it to his mouth for a long pull. Asshole didn’t even try to hide his beautiful, beautiful smile.
Desperate to get away from him for fear that my body’s next move was curling into his side, I walked around the island and stopped beside Catalina. “How bad is it?”
She gave me a quick once-over. “It’s just a gash. It’ll scar, but he won’t die.”
“Good. Good,” I said just before poking him hard on the bandage.
Drew jumped away, cradling his eye. “What the hell, woman?”
I stabbed a finger at him. “That was for lying to me.”
He swung a hand out to Penn. “That was his idea!”
“Hey!” Penn objected. “Don’t blame me for all of this. You were the one who wanted me to make her think I was stealing all her money.”
I bulged my eyes at Drew, switching the beer in my other hand before going in for another poke.
He dodged it. “Shit, stop.”
“Oh, this is just the beginning, Drew.” I prowled toward him. He backed away, but I kept advancing until I was all but chasing him around the kitchen. “You watched me cry for days. You sat there with a front-row seat while I fell apart. You better sleep with one eye open, because when I’m done with you”—I pointed to his bandage, taking great pride in the way he jumped back—“the only scar you’re
going to have is my fingerprint right there.”
Catalina and the girls giggled.
However, Drew’s mouth fell open. “Jesus, you’re scary.”
“You have no idea,” Catalina said and then snapped her fingers. “Sit. I’m not done with you yet.”
“You gonna be able to protect me from her while you finish?” he asked Catalina, keeping his gaze locked on mine as he meandered over to the stool.
“Probably not,” she replied, flashing him a teasing smile. “But if you hurry up, I’ll give you an extra layer of gauze for padding while you sleep.”
Just as he sat back down, I lurched toward him, my finger poised.
He shot right back to his feet, throwing his hands up to block his face. “Come on. Quit. This isn’t funny.”
The twitch of my lips on a night when I’d thought it was impossible said otherwise.
Cora
“You can fuck right the hell off with that shit,” Catalina whisper-yelled while pacing a hole in Penn’s hardwoods. Her straight, long, brown hair floated behind her with every turn. “You didn’t live with that monster.”
Drew’s nostrils flared as he watched her every movement, his fists opening and closing at his sides. He’d been staring at her all night. But this was different.
Unable to sit still, he’d abandoned the couch at least twenty minutes earlier and was currently leaning against the wall at the mouth of the hallway, constantly shifting his weight from one foot to the other. “No. I didn’t. But I promise you, if the man is still getting an hour of time under my fucking sun and three meals a day, it’s too much for me.”
I looked at Penn, who was sitting on the couch adjacent to mine. We were on opposite ends, literally as far away as the seating would allow.
“Still nothing?” I asked him, incredulous.
His blue gaze lifted to mine, but he said not the first word. He’d been silent since this argument had started.
After Penn had ordered an army’s worth of Chinese food, we’d all gathered around the island, forks in hand, and devoured it—sans plates.
I’d received countless hugs from Savannah and Isabel, while River had mainly kept to herself, that is if you didn’t count the way she never tore her suspicious gaze off Penn. At first, I’d thought she was just shocked to see him again, but the longer I watched her watching him, I got the feeling that she was living by the “keep your enemies close” theory. I couldn’t blame her. My implicit trust in him had vanished too, but for her sake, I’d smiled as we’d all piled onto the couches with full bellies.
Not long after, the girls had one by one wandered down the hall to Savannah’s room and shut the door. They were still awake—hence the whisper-yells. But the “what to do with Thomas Lyons” conversation was in full effect.
Drew wanted to kill him.
Catalina wanted to send him to jail for the rest of his life.
Penn had been quiet, but he’d been clenching his teeth to the point that I’d wanted to Google nearby emergency dentists just in case.
And I… Well, I sat there in my new constant state of being: confusion.
“Under your sun?” Catalina snapped, crossing her arms over her chest. “Who died and left you the universe?”
“My sister,” he snarled.
Catalina’s eyes narrowed on him. “Then you know that death is too good for a vile, self-absorbed piece of shit like that. I want him to rot in a cell, with fear terrorizing him the way he made sure it terrorized me. I want him to wake up every morning wondering if it’s his last. I want him to pause, his palms sweating and his heart racing, before he walks around a corner. Every time a person passes him, I want his stomach to spasm while waiting for the blow to land in his gut. And God willing, I want there to be a man who teaches him the same way that he taught me that no doesn’t ever mean no. Too many nights, I lay in bed until the sun rose, my mind tormenting me with every possible scenario of what would happen when he found me. Sometimes I’d even manage to fall asleep only to wake up screaming at the top of my lungs when the fear followed me into slumber. I want all of that for him, because for fourteen fucking years—fourteen years, Drew—I’ve lived like that. It’s his turn now.”
He cracked his neck and shoved off the wall. “Don’t worry. I’ll make sure he’s good and scared before I slit his throat.”
We were all coming at this from a dark and desperate place. Our personal pain and anguish were guiding our path.
Catalina had lived in fear—so she wanted Thomas to do the same.
Drew had lost his sister—so he wanted Thomas to lose his life.
And while Penn hadn’t directly stated it yet, I assumed that his reign of terror against his molars each time Catalina would speak meant he disagreed with her. He’d watched his wife be murdered—so he wanted to torture Thomas in the same way.
But I was in an interesting situation. Short of Manuel Guerrero, I hated Thomas Lyons more than anyone left on the Earth. He’d abused my best friend, killed a kind and good woman, and most recently had me arrested and put my daughter into a group home. Whether he ended up in jail or six feet under, it was all fine by me. However, I wasn’t driven by unspeakable loss or blinded by hatred. From where I was sitting, all I could see were three innocent people I cared about allowing their emotions to cloud reality.
I’d done that too many times while trying to escape the Guerreros over the years. I’d gotten so pissed or scared that I’d jumped out of the plane without checking to see if I had a parachute. The truth was taking Thomas down wasn’t going to be as easy as Catalina storming back in and going to the police anymore. He’d proven that when he’d somehow shown up at Catalina’s door, a gun aimed at Drew’s face, two of his lowlife pals pulling up the rear.
Nor was it as easy as Drew and Penn putting him in a grave. Thomas hadn’t gotten to where he was by being outsmarted. Penn had used the element of surprise with Marcos and Dante, but if what Thomas had said earlier about Drew losing his sister was in fact the threat I thought it was, they were already in his crosshairs too.
Tapping my fingers to my palm, I stood up. “Can we have a timeout for a minute?”
All of their scowls softened when they landed on me.
“I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but after tonight, I think we need to figure out plan C. Thomas knows you’re back, Cat. I’d be willing to bet my life that, right now, that man is already working on a preemptive strike against you. It wouldn’t surprise me one bit if he already had a laundry list of charges and a smear campaign ready for the moment you reemerge.” I turned to look at Drew. “And you. He knows who you are and he’s put two and two together with Lisa.” I turned to Penn. “Which means he’s probably already on to you as well. He’s not going to go down without a fight, and while Thomas is the law, he has never once followed it. It’s going to get bad. He knows the buttons of every person in this room and I have not one doubt he’s going to press all of them in the next few days. So, if we can’t even stop fighting amongst ourselves, we’re hopeless against him.”
Catalina sucked in a deep breath. “You’re right.”
Drew scoffed. “No, she’s not right. She’s the antithesis of right. She’s so obviously wrong, right won’t even claim her anymore. She’s beyond—”
“Enough,” Penn growled. “Right. Wrong. Purple. Banana. It doesn’t fucking matter tonight. It’s late. We all need to get some rest. First thing in the morning, we can regroup and figure out the details. But, for now, I need sleep. Catalina, you’re in the spare. Drew, you’ve got the couch. Cora, you’re with me.”
I laughed, loud and genuine, complete with folding an arm over my stomach and doubling over. “Oh, God, that was funny.” I pointed at Penn. “Nice touch there at the end.”
He arched an eyebrow, his face stoic as ever. “Who’s joking? Let’s go. You can be pissed all you want, but—”
All humor dissipated. “Do not finish that statement. Do not think for one second that you are going to tell me what
I’m going to do. You will lose. Every single time. I’m a big girl, with big-girl feelings and a big-girl brain. I can decide where I want to sleep, and tonight, after the day I’ve had, that is not with you.”
His eyes flashed dark, but then, just as quickly, they cut over my shoulder. “All I meant—”
“Oh, I know what you meant. No need to explain. You don’t need time—I got it. But I do. And that does not involve crawling into your bed. So, tonight, Isabel can sleep with her mom, I’ll sleep with River and Savannah, and you and Drew can play rock-paper-scissors for the master for all I care.”
His lips thinned. “It’s only one queen bed, Cora. You’ll wake up with bruises you sleep in there with the two of them.”
I shrugged. “Better on the outside than allowing you to put any more on my inside.”
He frowned—gorgeous and frustrated.
I held his stare—pinchy-faced and perturbed.
Eventually, he gave up, planting a hand on his hip as he turned his glare on the floor. “Christ, you are stubborn.”
“Not a revelation.” I walked over to Catalina and gave her arm a squeeze. “You gonna be able to sleep tonight?”
She smiled, her whole beautiful face warming. “Probably not, but I’m exhausted.”
“Me too.”
We started down the hall, leaving the guys alone in the living room. Neither of us had anything to sleep in, but all we really needed were the three girls in the bedroom and a deadbolt on the front door.
Story of my life.
Just before I opened Savannah’s bedroom door, I peeked over my shoulder at Penn. He was standing at the mouth of the hall, his smoldering gaze locked on my back. Yeah, I’d escaped sleeping in his bed that night, but I had no idea how much longer that would last. I wanted to be with him—desperately and deeply. But I also needed space to decide if that was even a plausible idea anymore.
He’d lied to me more times than I could count.
But even through the paralyzing betrayal, I could understand why he’d thought that was best.