But that was the cowardly thing to do. And I had never wanted to be a closed-off hermit, hiding my feelings from someone because I thought that they might not reciprocate.
Besides, from Bailey’s reaction at seeing me here in Vegas, I had to assume that she liked me as much as I liked her. Maybe even loved me as well.
Bailey sighed and leaned into me for a moment. “I wish you could stay longer,” she said. “I know you have things that you need to get back to. Like the resort. Thank you again for taking things over for me while I’m gone.” She paused, nudging her eggs around on her plate. “But I wish that you could be here. Or that I could be back there.” She wrinkled her nose. “Really, I just wish that I could be back there.”
“Soon,” I promised her, even though I knew it wasn’t up to me. I was relieved to see the way that she smiled at me, though. She really was planning on coming back to Utah, then. A weight lifted from my heart.
“Anyway, we have a lot to do if you only have a couple days here,” Bailey continued. She glanced over at the clock and giggled a little. “Especially since we’ve already wasted nearly half the day!”
“It’s only ten,” I pointed out, shrugging. “We have plenty of time.”
Bailey looked back at me, eyes twinkling. “Yeah, but I need a shower. And I assume you want one as well. And we might as well shower together. So there goes quite a bit of time already.”
I smirked at her. “Fair enough,” I said, liking how natural things felt between us. We were on the same page. And it was great. I wasn’t even sure that Beth and I had ever clicked this perfectly.
“So what is there to see in Vegas other than casinos, anyway?” I asked Bailey as we continued to eat.
“Oh, we’ll start with the casinos and see what else we have time for,” Bailey said.
“I don’t know, I’m not much of a gambling man,” I protested. I knew that while I was in Vegas, I probably had to see at least some of the spectacle of the place. But to be honest, the longer I sat here next to Bailey, the more I wanted to just keep her there in bed with me for the entire weekend. I didn’t want slot machines and stupid card games to get in the way of that.
Bailey laughed as though she had expected me to say that. “Don’t worry,” she said, her eyes twinkling. “I think I can figure out a way to make gambling fun for you.”
Sure enough, as we walked into the casino later, her dressed in a cute green dress she had changed into when we stopped by her place as she led me towards the blackjack table, I had to admit that I was more interested in this than I ever would have imagined. There was something sexy about watching Bailey, so confident and comfortable here as she greeted the dealer. And that grin that she flashed over at me?
I suddenly wondered just what I had gotten myself into.
56
Bailey
No matter how much help I and the dealer tried to give to Adam, he still was pretty terrible at blackjack. But he was game enough to keep playing. And from the heated looks that he kept shooting me, I could tell that part of it was because I was the one sitting there near him, my legs artfully arranged to show off their length.
There was no mistaking the fact that he’d rather take me back upstairs and strip me down. And the thrill of this, teasing him like this, having that kind of power over him? Well, it turned me on as well. But I didn’t want to end the tease just yet.
I leaned over towards Adam as the dealer shuffled the cards. His shoulder felt warm beneath my hand as I steadied myself against him, my lips just brushing his ear. “You bored?” I asked him.
Adam grinned and shrugged. “Thought you were going to show me all that Vegas had to offer,” he teased. “And so far, all I’ve seen is this one blackjack table. And the bedroom.”
I laughed and straightened up. “Let’s go, then,” I suggested. There was plenty more that I wanted to show him.
I didn’t know why I wanted to show him around so much. Well, part of it was that I wanted to show him off. I knew people here in Vegas, and they knew me. I had seen the way Matt, the dealer, had looked at us in surprise as I walked up on Adam’s arm. He had given Adam a once-over, and I could tell from his expression that he knew just how attractive Adam was. And he approved of that.
I wanted everyone to know that I was with Adam. That he had flown all the way out to Vegas to be with me. Oh, they might not all know the full story about Brooks Mountain Resort and the fact that Adam was the mechanic there. Probably best that they didn’t, really. But I wanted everyone to know that I was taken.
Because I really was taken. I had known that I had missed Adam, in the time that I had been here in Vegas. Seeing him again had only made me realize how much. And waking up next to him that morning? I couldn’t quite put a name to the expression that I had seen in his eyes, but I knew that it was reflected back at him in my own gaze.
There was no way that I was letting him go.
So I wanted to show him everything that there was to see here in Vegas. This might not be my whole life anymore. I still couldn’t wait to get back to Utah. But this place was a part of me. It had made me who I was in so many ways, especially when it came to business. I wanted Adam to know all of that.
Besides, it was kind of fun to have fun with Adam there. I never really got to experience Vegas like everyone else. Normally if I was at the casinos, it was because I was working. I wasn’t just out to gamble and have fun. I had forgotten some of the charm of the place. The way time just seemed to pass as you wandered through the elaborate hallways of the different casinos, marveling at the architecture, the shops, the glitz and the glamor.
Adam laughed and shook his head as we wandered. “This place is just nuts,” he said, craning his neck to look up at the high, painted ceilings.
“It is,” I agreed. “Honestly, even I am afraid that I’ll get lost here sometimes. I know that’s crazy, but it just feels like there’s always more to discover.” I shrugged and leaned into him. “Vegas is such a love-it or hate-it kind of place, but for me, I definitely love it. I guess I’m biased, though.”
“I don’t know if I love it,” Adam admitted, looking down at me. “But today has definitely been fun.”
“Worth leaving Utah for?” I joked, and Adam laughed.
“Oh yeah,” he said, and I knew he wasn’t just saying that because of the tour of the city that I was trying to give him.
We wandered in silence for a bit down fake cobblestoned streets, and I couldn’t help sneaking glances up at Adam, watching his expression. He looked fascinated and amused, and I counted that as a win.
“Come on, let’s get ice cream,” I suggested, steering him towards one of my favorite places.
Adam raised an eyebrow at me. “Shouldn’t we eat some proper food?” he asked. “Lunch? Or dinner?” He frowned, glancing at his watch. “This place is kind of like the Twilight Zone,” he said. “You can’t even tell what time of day it is here.”
“All the better to keep people in here,” I pointed out. “If you don’t realize just how much time you’ve spent in here, then you don’t realize that it’s time for you to leave. Besides, the passage of time would kill the fantasy of it all.”
Adam snorted. “Yeah, I guess that makes sense.” He looked around. “I can’t imagine living in a place like this.”
I tried not to feel disappointed at that. Did he think of me differently because I had lived here for so long? Did he look down on people like me? “Well, if you live here, to be honest, you probably don’t come out to the casinos all the time. I mean, there are some people who do. But it just kind of becomes the same after a while, you know? And I’ve never really been interested in gambling. Ian does more of that than I do.”
“I didn’t mean it like it was a bad thing,” Adam said hurriedly, like he was afraid that he had offended me. “I just meant that I can’t imagine living here. But I’m sure most of these people can’t imagine living like I do either.”
“What do you mean?” I asked curiously.
>
Adam shrugged. “I’m way out in the middle of nowhere,” he said. “I mean, I’m not. The town isn’t that far away. But you’ve seen where I am. It’s just Dad and I out there. And Ethan. If we want to go anywhere else, we have to drive. Most people just don’t want to live like that.”
“I guess not,” I said slowly, shrugging my shoulders. “Honestly, I can’t wait until I’m back in Utah. Things just seem so much more relaxed there. So much more real.”
We were still lingering outside the ice cream shop. After a moment, Adam seemed to finally realize it. He grinned and steered me inside. “I guess I’m on vacation,” he said. “If I want to eat ice cream for dinner, then I can do that.”
I laughed. “That’s the spirit,” I said.
We got ice cream and sat down at one of the wrought-iron bistro tables with a good view of the ‘street’. It might be a random Saturday in January, but there was still plenty of foot traffic strolling by us.
“So, you can’t wait until you’re back in Utah?” Adam asked slowly. His tone was carefully measured, and there was something in the way that he was carefully not looking at me, staring down into his ice cream as he stirred it around with his spoon, that told me there was a certain subtext to what he was saying.
“I’m coming back to Utah,” I said quietly but firmly. I set my ice cream down on the table, reaching over to catch his hand. “I know that it hasn’t exactly been fair, me dumping all this work on you. Or asking you to wait for me. Especially since I haven’t been able to tell you when I planned on coming back. I know it’s been difficult. But I am definitely coming back.”
I saw relief break across Adam’s face, and my heart twisted in my chest. Here I had been, wondering if he was even interested in me anymore, if there had been something about the fact that he had asked me if this was just some seasonal fling, what he and I had. I hadn’t thought that he might be doubting us just the same way. I hadn’t thought about the fact that I had done nothing but give him things to doubt since I had come here to Vegas.
“All right,” Adam said. He took a bite of his ice cream, and I could tell that he had something that he wanted to say. I waited patiently. “It’s not the work that really bothers me,” he finally said slowly. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, I don’t exactly love taking over the weekly meetings and that kind of stuff. I’m a lot happier working with my hands than I am doing basic administrative stuff. But that’s all fine.”
He paused again and then took a deep breath. “But I’ve missed seeing you around. And not knowing if you were really coming back…” He trailed off.
“I told you that I was coming back,” I reminded him, even though I knew that wasn’t exactly fair. I had told him that I was coming back, and he had told me that he would wait for me. But that had been one of those dramatic moments while we were at the airport, while we were losing one another. And things had changed. I hadn’t really trusted what he had told me either.
Adam sighed and smiled at me. “I know you told me that you were coming back,” he acknowledged, nodding at me. “But there were a few people at work who didn’t believe you were. Something about you taking yourself off payroll. And Kayla says that she’s barely heard anything from you.”
I winced. How to explain this? “I took myself off payroll because it’s not fair for me to be taking in money from the resort when I’m not actually working there,” I said, shrugging. “And besides, we’ve taken a bit of a cut on our profits lately because of Ian. I managed to return most of the stuff that he had ordered, but there were some deposits or percentages of certain payments that the mountain couldn’t get back.”
“You’re not responsible for that,” Adam protested.
“I know I’m not,” I said. “At least not entirely. But I am responsible for making sure that we go through with all the investments that we’ve already promised to our customers. And the only way that we’re going to be able to do everything that I want us to do is to make sure that we keep things operating in the green.” I shrugged. “Anyway, I hate to say it, but it’s not like I need the money. I put a lot of my money into buying the resort and my condo, but I’m not exactly in a tough place right now.”
“And I guess the casino is paying you for the work you’re doing to help Ian,” Adam surmised, nodding. He sighed. “That makes me feel better.”
“I’m sorry I made you worry,” I said quietly.
Adam grinned ruefully at me. “Also not your fault,” he said. “Not entirely, anyway.” He took a deep breath, looking down at his hands. “I just care about you. You probably already know that, but I’m not sure you know how much.”
“How much?” I asked softly, barely daring to hope for the answer.
Adam laughed, looking quickly up at me. “I miss Utah,” he said. “But I realized this morning that if you needed to stay here long-term, or if you didn’t want to come back at some point? Well, I’d stay here with you. I’d do whatever it took.” He paused. “I know I told you before, and I’ll tell you again; you’re going to have to be patient with me. I was sure that after I lost Beth, I was never going to be able to care about anyone like that again.”
He swallowed. “You can’t imagine what it feels like, watching someone you love slowly wither away into nothing. She got sick, and then she got sicker. And the whole time, I couldn’t help but think that it was all my fault. I know, logically, that it wasn’t. But if I had just noticed the signs sooner, if I had been around to help out with Ethan more, maybe she would have gotten checked out sooner and maybe things would have been different.”
He took a deep breath. “I spent the final months of Beth’s life closing myself off to everyone. Refusing to ever feel that kind of hurt again.”
“But you’re not closed off with Ethan,” I reminded him quietly.
Adam looked surprised for a moment. “No, I’m not,” he finally said. “You’re right. And out of everyone in the world, Ethan is the person I would most hate to lose.” He grinned ruefully at me. “But you’re creeping up there, I have to admit.”
I laughed, my heart soaring. That was as close to admitting he loved me as he could manage, I was sure. And it made my own pulse quicken in response. I had already told him, back at the airport before I left Park City, that I cared about him. But I was starting to realize that I cared about him even more than I had realized. And it sounded like maybe, just maybe, he felt the same way about me.
“I’m kind of worried that I’m never going to be as great as Beth was.” I blurted out the words before I had even given voice to that mild jealousy inside of my head.
Adam looked taken aback. I expected him to brush it off, to voice some quiet platitude to make me feel better. I knew that Beth must have been so important to him. That she would always be important to him, whether she was here or not. She lived on in Adam’s memories, and in Ethan.
It was part of why relationships had always made me nervous. I knew that my parents would always love one another, even though they were separated. And I knew that it made every other relationship difficult for them. There were always those comparisons between what you had now and what you had had before. How could I possibly measure up to someone that Adam had chosen to be the mother of his first child?
But Adam didn’t patronize me. Instead, he nodded seriously. “That’s a fair worry,” he said. “And to be honest, I’m really worried that I’ll do something careless to make you feel like you’re second-best.” He paused, and I tried not to let those words hurt me. Did he think that I was second-best? Was he just making do with me because he couldn’t have Beth any longer?
He wasn’t finished yet, however. “I love Beth, still. But you’re so different from her, in so many ways. There isn’t really a comparison there. And I don’t want you to ever feel like you need to live up to who she was. You’re so special in your own way, Bailey.” He shook his head. “Honestly, I didn’t think that I was ever going to be able to open myself up to anyone again, but with you, it was like I never
even had a choice. You make me want to be the best person that I can be, all for you.”
I stared at him for a moment, shocked to hear that. Of course, on some level, I had known that that was how he was feeling, but I hadn’t really expected to hear him say that. Not just yet, anyway. I couldn’t help feeling moved by it. I reached out to tangle my fingers in his, squeezing lightly. “I’m coming back to Utah,” I promised him, wondering if he could hear how choked with emotion my voice was in that moment. “We’re going to figure this out.”
I didn’t know how we were going to make things work. I knew that he kept cautioning me that I would need to be patient with him, and I knew that he would need to be patient with me as well. I hadn’t ever been in a relationship like this before. Not a relationship that really felt like it might last.
Not only that, but I didn’t know how we were going to manage to keep things going while I was here in Vegas. I knew that he couldn’t stay here with me for the next few weeks, as much as I might like that. He had responsibilities back in Park City, with the mountain and with his son. I had responsibilities here; the board of directors wanted me to stick around for a little while longer to keep Ian in check.
And the whole reason Ian had brought Adam out here was to thank me for helping him save his job. Speaking of which, I needed to remember to give Ian a call and thank him for this. I still could barely believe what he had done.
But I had a feeling Ian wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t hear from me until Monday when Adam was on his way back to Utah.
For a moment, I wondered if I should feel guilty about taking a whole weekend to disappear with Adam. I should still be making sure that Ian was okay, that he was doing his work as usual. Especially after he had taken the previous day off, maybe I should check in with the board and make sure that they were still happy with the current arrangements.
One Shot At Love: A Billionaire Single Father Romance Page 32