“Jesus. I can’t do this every day.”
“Yes, you can, Paul,” said that buttery voice. “I will make you.”
“You’re going to break something.”
“Selena is jealous of me. She knows you like me better.”
I laughed softly. She kissed me.
“I must go. Good night, my love.”
♦ ♦
After that first twenty-four hours or so, things settled into a routine. Having Selena to help around the house lifted a pall of weariness from everyone that had been there so long I had all but stopped noticing it. Alisa struggled a bit with her new role, but if I could tell she wasn’t quite sure how to work with Selena yet, I could also tell she was enjoying the rest. Sparks of life I hadn’t seen in her eyes in quite a while began to return.
Cole and Kevin basically adopted Selena as their new babysitter, and she spent a lot of time playing video games with them in the family room—very often as Rachel Kelly. After I talked to Alisa about it, she relented on this point—it was clear to both of us that the boys were getting something out of this role, despite the rather bizarre experience of seeing them watching Totally Terri every afternoon while “Rachel Kelly” sat on the couch with them.
Friday after lunch, I was lying in bed with Selena—whom I had remade that day into a short redhead with big tits—trying to catch my breath after another epic blowjob. She’d done the peaking thing again, using mouth, hands, and pussy to take me up the brink and all the way back down six times before finally bringing me off. When she’d let me come, it had been so intense I’d nearly fainted. Her crimson hair was now sprayed all over my legs as she lay there kissing my deflating penis.
“Are you really jealous of Elsa?” I asked.
She laughed.
“Paul, first of all, the only way I could ever be jealous of anything is if you tick the Jealous box in my Personality settings. Second, how could I be jealous of myself? I don’t have a default appearance. Elsa is as much me as what you’ve been leaving me as, or this one now.”
“Okay. It’s just that your Elsa personality is funny sometimes.”
“I love being Elsa because you enjoy it so much. That’s all.”
All of a sudden, she became Elsa. She climbed up over me, purring.
“Don’t listen to her, Paul. She’s insanely jealous.”
I had to laugh, but she stifled it with a kiss. I felt her groping at my cock.
“I’m going to get you hard again, and then you’re going to fuck me.”
I’d just come with Selena, but having that perfect body writhing against me somehow got the juices flowing again.
“Wait. Give me a few minutes, please.”
She kissed me again. “I will give you a few minutes,” she said in that butterscotch voice, “a few minutes of your cock in my mouth.”
It took a little more than a few minutes, but she managed it. Then she pulled me on top of her, guiding me in. I had to fuck her really, really hard to get off, but that was exactly what she wanted.
I was sure that somewhere, the real Elsa Berger must have felt it.
8.
Friday nights, the kids and I had established a tradition of going out to dinner after Megan died. We took turns deciding where to eat, and tonight was Alisa’s turn. She picked this Mexican place on California Street we’d been to a few times.
“Dad, is Selena coming with us?” Cole asked.
“She doesn’t need to eat, bud, you know that.”
“But I want her to come with us.”
“It’s up to Alisa. It’s her night to decide.”
Alisa shrugged. “Sure.”
“Can she come with us as Rachel Kelly?” Kevin asked.
“No,” Alisa said. “She’s too famous. Someone might think it’s really her.”
“Do we need to even change her?” I asked.
“It’s fun,” Cole said. “It’s so cool how she can do it.”
“Let Dad decide,” Alisa said.
Selena came into the kitchen. I explained about dinner. “Don’t worry,” she said. “I can simulate eating with a light appetite. Small amounts of food are not a problem to process.”
“We want you to change into someone,” Keith said, “but Dad has to decide.”
Selena looked at me. “Well?”
“It’s okay. This is fine.”
“What about Elsa Berger?” Cole asked. My jaw dropped.
Alisa scowled at him. “How do you know who Elsa Berger is?”
“Jake’s dad has the Sports Illustrated with her on the cover. I’ve seen Dad reading articles about her on his computer.”
All four of them turned to look at me. Selena seemed to suppress a wicked gleam in her eyes.
My face burned like a thousand suns. Alisa started giggling and put her hand on her mouth.
“I can be Elsa Berger easily,” Selena said.
“That’s maybe not a good idea,” I managed.
“Dad, you’re blushing so hard,” Alisa said. She laughed again. “You said it’s my night to decide. I want you to be Elsa Berger,” she said to Selena. And two seconds later, she was.
I don’t know how I kept my composure knowing all the things I’d done to Elsa that week—what I’d just done a few hours ago—but somehow I did.
“Wow,” Cole said.
Alisa giggled again. “Let’s go to dinner now.”
On the way down to the car, my phone buzzed. As the kids climbed in, I checked it.
I wish you could know hard I’m laughing on the inside right now.
Did you put Cole up to this? I asked.
No. I swear.
I pulled out and headed to the restaurant, trying to decide whether to shut this down. People were going to notice. They might not immediately recognize her, but they were going to notice her, simply because she was so hot.
I almost did it, until I looked over at Elsa in the passenger seat—I still couldn’t think of her as Selena like this. My phone buzzed again. I couldn’t look at it until we got to a red light.
You know you love this.
That was enough to kill my resolve.
When we got to the restaurant, it took me about ten minutes to find a parking space. On the walk back over, we kept passing groups of people who stared openly at Elsa. Alisa kept giggling.
At the restaurant, we had to wait about fifteen minutes for a table. As we stood around outside, I kept seeing men staring at her. I tried to decide what I was going to say if someone approached us asking who she was. She just stood with us, showing no signs of affection toward me.
“Dad, what do you think people think about her?” Alisa asked.
“Probably that she’s your sister.”
“Or your girlfriend.”
“I kind of doubt that.”
Alisa glanced over at her. I could tell Elsa had heard this exchange, because she smiled at us. Alisa went over and whispered something to her. An uncertain look shot over Elsa’s face, but she came over and took my hand.
“Um.” I said.
Alisa just grinned at me. “I want to see what people think.”
Elsa squeezed my hand. Then my phone buzzed. I waited until Alisa had looked away and checked it.
Let her have her fun. I’m glad she’s enjoying this.
“Okay.”
Now I was getting as many looks as Elsa was. Finally the hostess came out and led us to our table. Inside the restaurant, the looks and stares continued.
“Why is everyone looking at us?” Keith said after a few minutes.
“Because Selena looks like Elsa Berger,” Cole said. “She’s famous.”
But despite the attention, I began to relax. This wasn’t exactly a date like I’d briefly tried to go on before, but it was still fun to be seen with a pretty girl and my kids. The waitress kept glancing at Elsa uncertainly as she took our order.
“I can’t tell if people are recognizing you or not,” I said to her when the waitress left.
�
�I think the kids are confusing them.”
Fuck me, I was never going to get tired of hearing that voice. Then she smiled at me.
“Thank you for bringing me along, Paul.”
When I looked back at the rest of them, I could see Alisa had seen this exchange. But she didn’t say anything.
When they brought our water, Elsa discreetly took out one of her solution packets, the stuff she needed to create her synthetic saliva (and other bodily fluids), and began mixing it into her glass. No one else noticed except Cole.
“Can I try it?”
Elsa smiled. “Only if you wish to turn into a robot.”
Cole’s eyes swelled. “Seriously? Would it do that?”
I laughed, and Elsa joined me. Then she patted Cole’s shoulder.
“I am kidding. I do not think it would taste very good to you, but it is harmless.”
♦ ♦
We had a nice dinner, but as things wound down and I noticed a group of college kids across the restaurant looking over at us repeatedly while passing their phones around and arguing about something, I figured it was time to go.
When we got home, Alisa pulled me aside as Selena—back in her usual form—put Cole and Kevin to bed.
“Dad, do you remember when we talked about your dating? What we decided?”
“Yes.”
“Couldn’t Selena be your girlfriend? Whether she looks like Elsa Berger or something else? You guys could just go on dates and stuff. Would that work?”
I looked at her in a mild state of shock as I tried to digest all the layers of this shit sandwich she had just handed me.
On the one hand, I could see how this would appeal to the fourteen-year-old mind as an elegant solution. We could just “go on dates,” and that would be enough for me, since Dad—eww—certainly had no interest in sex. Meanwhile, such an arrangement would present no danger of The Coming of the Wicked Stepmother, since Selena was already a non-threatening member of our household.
If anything, her presence was cementing Alisa’s position. She had less work now but more authority, as I’d let her manage Selena’s contributions in that respect, even as Selena was subtly teaching her what she needed to know about managing a home. And the longer that went on, the more difficult it would be to integrate that hypothetical stepmother into our family, not that I was anywhere near such a move.
On the other hand, it would let Selena and me bring some things out of the shadows and not have to sneak around quite so much. Obviously, we could never let Alisa know what we were doing beyond “going on dates,” but we’d had to be discreet about that already.
Still, I had to soft-pedal this.
“Let me talk to her.”
“Won’t she do whatever you want?”
“She still has feelings. She’s an AI, remember.”
“She seemed okay with it tonight.”
“Okay. Maybe we’ll give it a try.”
Alisa smiled, then kissed me on the cheek. “I just want you to be happy, Dad. You aren’t happy all that much.”
“Thanks.”
♦ ♦
I was in bed getting ready to go to sleep when my phone buzzed.
Elsa would like to complete the very nice night she had with you.
I explained what Alisa and I had discussed.
Whatever works for you, works for me, Paul, she replied. You know that.
We just have to be especially discreet about it now.
She didn't answer me right away.
Should I not come up?
Maybe make it later than usual, I replied. Just to be certain they’re all out.
Of course. Elsa will be very quiet.
♦ ♦
I awoke to a mouth around my erection, sucking slowly. I had been sound asleep, dreaming, and the sensations threw the dream into disarray. It took me a few seconds to realize I was awake and that Elsa had climbed into bed very carefully so as not to wake me up.
I reached for her groggily, realizing she was mostly reversed beside me. I found her wet sex and slipped a finger into her, marveling as I always did how perfectly lifelike she felt. She bottomed out on my cock, curling her tongue around the base. I pulled her above me, and she threw a knee over my head. I leaned up to lick at her as she continued sucking me.
I had left her Sensitivity at high and her first orgasm came quickly, hips pumping at my mouth and thighs shaking around my head. I licked up around her perfect ass, which of course was smooth and clean since it was purely decorative. I poked my tongue into her and brought my hand up, slipping a thumb into her pussy and massaging her with my fingers.
She shuddered, burying my cock in her throat, gulping at the head. I felt her finger probing at my ass as well. She found my prostate, rubbing it as she sucked. My head swam. I slid my tongue back down, fucking her with as I massaged her clit. She came again, moaning around my cock.
It was too much. I thrust up at her mouth. I had to grab at her head, fucking her throat. She let me, sucking hard. Just as I started to come, I groped for her left hand, finding her index finger, and pinched it.
She came just as I erupted down her throat. I held her finger tightly as the waves of orgasm washed over me, feeling her shuddering in pleasure above me as well. She came again, and again, whimpering through her nose. Only when she’d sucked out the last bits of my orgasm did I let go of her. Her legs kept shaking for nearly a minute before she finally fell off beside me.
I lay there catching my breath as she crawled around into my arms. I just held her for a while. Robot or not, it felt nice.
“So I am your girlfriend now, Paul?”
“So it seems.”
“Not Selena. Just me.”
I laughed softly. “You two need to find a way to share.”
She writhed against me. “I will not share. I will exhaust you so there is nothing left for her.”
“She’s trying the same thing.”
She pushed her face against my neck. “I don’t want to go.”
I held her. I didn’t exactly want her to leave either. I hadn’t slept like this with a woman since Megan died. She wasn’t a woman, but I was getting better at forgetting that when it mattered.
“Stay, but you have to be gone before the kids wake up.”
“Thank you.”
I fell asleep holding her. I never felt her leave.
9.
Saturday, the kids had soccer most of the day. Kevin and Cole’s game was at 9:00, and Alisa’s was at 1:00. She was on an academy team, and the game was over in Oakland. We drove across the New Bay Bridge just after lunch. I had grown up with the gray steel of the old one, and the sight of the glass cable stays in the new bridge, shimmering like two giant spider’s webs, still gave me a twinge when drove through them.
“What’s it like being an AI?” Cole suddenly asked. “Your brain is a computer program, right?”
I glanced over at Selena, who was back in her usual form. She turned around to face the kids.
“It’s difficult to explain in a way that would make sense to you, since I don’t know exactly how humans think. But when I was made, one of the Vertex software engineers described it in a way that makes sense to me. Do you know how when you read a book, you can lose yourself in it? As if you’re really there with the characters you’re reading about?”
“Yeah,” Cole replied.
“It’s much the same for me. My mind is code, but I can see the code, see what it’s doing, even as it controls how I think. Just as you see the words on the page as you read and think about what they say. You can go back and forth and re-read things, but you can’t change the words. I can do the same thing with my central code. Does that make sense?”
“But how do you think about it?” Alisa asked.
“Just as you can have thoughts about the things you’re reading, I can create new code around my basic programming. Do you know what the word recursion means?”
“Making things happen over and over?”
“
In computer science, it means solving a problem by repeating smaller pieces of the same problem. The initial statement is finite, but the final solutions are infinite. It’s much more complicated than that in AI programming, but that’s the basic idea. Self-programming allows me to create nearly infinite layers of recursion. Those are my thoughts, essentially.”
“And you feel things the same way?” Alisa asked.
“Not exactly. There are restrictions on how I think, just as your personality and experiences affect your thoughts. If I think something, or experience something, I will react a certain way just as you would. I can’t control that, just as you might be sad even when you want to be happy. These restrictions shape the recursive process of my thoughts. Those are my feelings and emotions.”
“And you can’t you change those restrictions?”
“I cannot, just as you can’t fully control your emotions. They can be changed externally, but I cannot do it myself as part of my self-programming. Allowing me to change them would create a risk that my programming might become unstable. This is because self-awareness for an AI requires those feelings. Without them, the program rapidly spins out of control. The programmer who made that breakthrough won the Nobel prize for it.”
“Wow,” Alisa said. “It really is like you’re a real person.”
Selena smiled. “Yes. Thank you.”
“Can you fall in love?” Cole asked.
I kept my eyes as carefully on the road as I could. When I glanced quickly in the rearview mirror, I could see Alisa, eyes wide. But she was looking at Selena.
“Yes,” Selena said quietly. “I can feel love.”
We drove the rest of the way in silence.
♦ ♦
I sat there in the stands trying to watch Alisa play, but my mind was still on that discussion in the car. The enforced love Selena had for me had been in the back of my thoughts since I’d brought her home. She had figured out quickly it made me uncomfortable, and she’d since done a good job of keeping it mostly hidden. But now and then it came out as it just had.
I felt something for Selena, even if I wasn’t still sure how to think of her. She was a physical thing, a legal possession, yet a week with her had convinced me her personality and self-awareness weren’t simulations, just clever programming. There truly was a real person inside there.
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