“I don’t either.” His jaw flexes as he hands me a clean plate, his eyes meeting mine. “I can’t in here. Doesn’t mean I regret a damn thing.”
I continue to dry while he washes, the tension in the air thick every time we look at each other. Ten minutes of washing dishes feels like an hour by the time he hands me the last dish once my brother brings in the stuff we left behind.
I can’t even speak to him at this point, because my throat feels dry from him being so close. Every time his hand brushed mine while passing off the dishes, my heart jumpstarted.
“You two done in here?” My brother grabs his keys from the counter, pulling my attention to him. “Easton and I are going to Stiles’ for a bit to chill. Sylvia and Blake will probably be there too. I just have to swing by my house first and change into a nicer shirt, so this guy doesn’t show me up. You coming or what?”
My stomach sinks at the mention of Sylvia and Blake being there too, but I stand strong on my decision, knowing it’s what’s best. “Can’t. I’m meeting Hope at Talon’s. You boys have fun.”
I glance in Easton’s direction, our eyes meeting for a split second, before I turn away and walk back into the dining room to say bye to my parents.
The moment I get outside, away from everyone, I shut the door behind me and fall against it. My hand goes to my racing heart as I take a few deep breaths now that I can finally breathe again with Easton out of touching distance.
It’s never been so hard to be in that house and not want to touch Easton. Or for him to touch me. I’m a shitty person for feeling this way. I couldn’t get out of there fast enough. His lips were so close to mine back in the garage that I’m terrified the next time we’re alone he’ll kiss me, and that I’ll let him. I’m scared I’ll cave over my need for him and betray my sister again. Then what? What happens when I can’t stop and we both get hurt in the end? That’s why I’ll have to just suffer and deal with the fact he’s about to be in the same place as Sylvia. He says he doesn’t want her, but doesn’t mean she won’t try to change his mind. That idea burns my chest, leaving an acidy feeling that I can’t stand.
It’s better than betraying Quinn again. That’s what I tell myself over and over again on the drive to Talon’s house, needing to convince myself no matter how much it hurts.
When I pull up, Hope is sitting in a lawn chair watching Talon work under the hood of her truck. She gives me a confused look as I make my way to her.
“Hey, girlie. You’re not going to Stiles’ with the rest of the gang?”
I shake my head and lean against her truck. “Hey, Talon,” I say when he nods at me. “Need some help?”
“Hell no.” He stands up and wipes a greased covered hand through his light hair. “I told Hope I could do it and I meant it. Why doesn’t anyone believe me?”
“Someone’s got their panties in a wad.” I tease. “Why so tense?”
Hope smiles from her seat. “Talon doesn’t know as much as he thinks he knows about trucks. He just doesn’t like when it’s pointed out, apparently. But personally, I sort of like watching him take out his anger under the hood. It’s entertaining.”
“I agree. I said the same thing when he tried working on a car that came into the shop once. He’s just not very knowledgeable there. Nothing wrong with that, big guy. You still have motorcycles.”
Talon crosses his arms and looks at us in dead silence, before turning away and taking his frustration out on Hope’s truck. “Fuck you both,” he mumbles with a slight smile. “Just sit there and enjoy the view.”
I pull up the other lawn chair, the one that has Talon’s beer in the holder and we both stare at Talon as he works. Well attempts to. She’s right, watching him get angry at the truck every few seconds is entertaining. It’s enough to distract my mind from Easton. For a few minutes at least.
“Why such a sour face?” I turn beside me to find Hope staring at me. “How did dinner go at your parents?”
“It went. Easton was there.”
“Oh wow. The first time since Quinn’s been gone, right?”
I nod and take a drink of Talon’s beer. “I just need to sit here for a bit and clear my head before I go home. Mind if I keep you company while Talon screws up your truck?”
“Dammit! You know what… never mind. You ladies enjoy making jokes at my expense. It’s only going to fuel me more.”
“That’s what we’re hoping,” Hope says with a wink. “Now turn back around and give us that view you promised.”
Talon’s mood changes and he lifts a brow our way. He’s cute and he knows it. With his long blond hair, a nose ring and tattoos. Even I have to admit he’s attractive. Especially when his stubble is just the right length. I’m pretty sure the only thing keeping Hope from going after him is that she’s wanted my brother longer.
“Back to work, blondie.” I laugh and shake my head.
We’re sitting here in silence for a while before Hope nudges me to get my attention. “What are you thinking so hard about?”
Easton’s kiss.
Wanting to kiss him again.
Feeling guilty for wanting to kiss Easton again.
What Sylvia is doing or saying to Easton right now.
The list goes on.
“Nothing. Just getting tired.” I stand and fake a yawn. “I’m going to call it a night. I’ll see you tomorrow.” I walk past Talon and glance his way on the way to my car. “I’ll see you in the morning.”
When I get back home, I go right back to my garage and throw myself into working on the bike. I’m angry at myself for feeling the things I do and even angrier that I can’t stop them.
Dakota
Thankfully I was able to talk my dad into letting me fetch parts today which kept me away from the shop for most of the day, giving me a better chance to avoid Easton as much as possible.
He wasn’t very happy with my absence. I could tell by the tightness of his jaw every time he noticed me come and go. To everyone else he pretended to be lost in work, but since I have a bad habit of not being able to keep my eyes off Easton, I knew where his attention really was. On me.
It had me making up excuses a few times just to make another trip for some bogus parts we don’t even need. My dad won’t be too happy about that once he figures it out, but that’s something I’ll have to deal with later. It seemed like the safer option at the time.
“You coming tonight?” I focus on Talon now that Easton has stepped back into the shop all dirty and sweaty. I can’t look at him looking the way he does right now and not want him.
“Nah, not this time. I’m whooped from working on Hope’s truck all night. There’s so much shit wrong with that piece of junk. I don’t know why she doesn’t upgrade.”
I laugh. “I don’t know. It’s pretty ugly too, but for some reason she loves it. Plan to spend a lot more time working on that beast because there’ll always be something wrong with it.”
“Ain’t that the damn truth.” Talon grabs the keys to his bike and backs up toward the door. “You ladies have fun tonight. Unfortunately, you won’t have as good of a view as last night, but you know… life isn’t always fair.” He shrugs and turns away, nodding to my brother as they pass each other.
“Hey, you ready for game night?” My brother questions, heading in Easton’s direction.
I don’t know why my heart sinks at the mention of Easton joining us for game night. I should’ve known he’d be there tonight. Why wouldn’t he be?
“Yeah.” He answers my brother but looks at me when he speaks. “Mind if we stop by your house so I can borrow a better shirt?”
“Sure thing. I might change too. I’m not feeling this T-shirt now.” My brother’s attention lands on me. “You coming? Hope is already there.”
Easton watches me hard, the look in his eyes causing my emotions to mess with me.
“Yeah. I’m heading out now.” I reach for my keys and try my best to hide my shaky hands. I’m not sure I’m ready to have a game night with E
aston, but it looks like I have no other choice. I already promised Hope I’d be there and if I keep backing out of activities, they’re going to start asking me questions that I can’t answer. “See you guys there.”
I hurry out of the shop and down the hall, anxious to get outside and away from the boys before my brother can catch on to how tense I am around Easton. How the hell am I supposed to act normal tonight when I feel anything but. Last night at dinner was hard enough already. But Easton is right. I can’t avoid him forever. So all I can do is suck it up and be as strong as I can.
When I pull up at the pub, I park my car next to Ben’s truck. He’s leaned against it, smoking a cigarette, but flicks it when he notices me getting out of my car.
“No Crews?” he questions tightly.
“He’s with my brother.” I slam my door shut and he meets me by the trunk, giving me a look that makes me feel slightly uncomfortable. “Hope is waiting for me. I’ll see you inside.”
He sighs and grabs my arm before I can walk away. “You know Crews has a thing for you, right? That he has since we were kids? Watch out, Dakota.”
I swallow and pull my arm free from his grip. “He was Quinn’s boyfriend. Don’t say shit like that.”
Before he can say anything more, I pull the door open and walk straight to the bar, needing a beer.
If Easton doesn’t make me lose my mind tonight, it’s going to be Ben. Either way, this is going to be the tensest game night by far.
Easton
Minutes after Dakota takes off, Roman and I head out to his place so we can change before game night. While he’s in his room looking for a new shirt to wear, I stand in the living room, thinking about what I’m going to say to Dakota to change her mind about us.
I need her to stop hiding from me… from our kiss. We both know it should’ve happened years ago—before anything between Quinn and I started. We were both too scared to admit things. Well, I’m done being scared when it comes to Dakota, but I know it’s going to take time for her to feel the same.
Since the moment I arrived back in town, I could feel her in my soul, taking over every part of me, even though she was nowhere around. When I saw her at the track for the first time in three years, those hate-filled eyes on me, I knew she’d break me before I’d be able to fix us.
I’m ready to be broken. I’m ready to take whatever she throws my way, because after knowing what it’s like to kiss her, there’s no life for me if I can’t have her. I know this now more than ever.
“You cool, man?”
I look up from buttoning up the shirt he loaned me, to see Roman looking at me with concern. I hadn’t even realized I was pacing until now. “I’m good. Just anxious to get a drink in me. It’s been a long day.”
He nods, his eyes suspicious. “Is there some shit I need to know?” He turns away just long enough to grab his keys from the nail on the wall. “Don’t think I haven’t noticed my sister being extra tense whenever you’re in the same room. Don’t fucking lie either. You’re like a brother to me. Like I said, I trust you.”
“You know your sister. She’s still pissed at me for showing my face here again. She can hardly stand to be around me. I can’t say I blame her. It was a shitty move—me not saying goodbye to her before I left town.”
“She’s more than pissed, Easton. You really hurt her when you left. Hurt me too, man.” He runs a hand through his hair and exhales. “Just be careful, okay? People have been talking since you’ve been back, and it’s forcing me to have to be the one to set that shit straight. Don’t give them a reason to talk.”
He walks outside and I follow him to his SUV. “Yeah? Saying what?”
He squeezes the steering wheel, before starting the engine and driving off. “That you and my sister are finally hooking up now that Quinn is out of the picture. It’s bullshit. I don’t want to find out that it’s true. That’s too fucked-up to even grasp.”
I swallow, trying my best to hide my guilt. I hate lying to Roman, and if I had it my way, I’d tell him the truth and fight for what I want. But I can’t do that to Dakota, because her life will be just as affected by my confession as mine would be. Maybe even more.
“You know how people like to talk around here and make shit up. Doesn’t make it true.”
“Good to know.” He sounds unsure, and he should be. “Just making sure. Ben’s dumbass already went behind my back to date my sister. I don’t need you doing the same. Especially when your ass was dating my other sister when she… you know...”
My jaw clenches tightly at the mention of Ben dating Dakota. “Whoa! What the fuck did you just say? Your sister went out with Ben?”
“Yeah.” The look on his face says he wants to kill Ben just as badly as I do. “For about two months, until she dumped his ass. I hate being reminded. I want to choke him whenever someone brings it up.”
I’m sitting here with my heart pounding so hard I’m surprised he can’t fucking feel it himself. Just the thought of Ben putting his lips and hands on Dakota makes me want to murder the son of a bitch.
What makes me even angrier is the fact that Dakota always told me she’d never hook up with Ben. In fact, she made me a promise, and if I had been here, I could’ve stopped it from happening. She’s too good for him. Always has been.
“You good? You look like you’re about to break your phone.”
“I’m good.” Yeah fucking right. I’m far from good, but he can’t know that shit. “Just dealing with some stuff back home at the shop today.” I lie. “There’s always something to take care of.”
“Yeah. I know how that is; dealing with shit for work when you’re not even around,” he says, concentrating on the road. “As long as it’s not my sister that has you strung so fucking tight.”
I don’t say anything as we pull up at the pub and my eyes land on Dakota’s car parked next to Ben’s truck. I can’t fucking speak right now without wanting to punch something.
“Looks like we’re the last ones to arrive.” Roman slams his door shut and walks around his SUV just as I’m shutting mine. “Let’s get this night started.”
I fall into step beside Roman, my jaw tight the whole way through the parking lot, because I have no clue how I’m going to look at Ben’s face and not break it with my fist.
If he says one wrong thing or even looks at Dakota for too long, I’m not so sure I can control myself. Not with the way I’m feeling right now. What makes it even more messed up is I want to get to her more now. I want my lips to make her forget that the douchebag even exists.
Stepping into the pub, I immediately seek out Dakota, needing to see that she’s nowhere near Ben.
I barely even notice Stiles approaching until his arm is slung around my shoulder, distracting me before I can find her. “What’s up, Champ? You ready to get your ass kicked in pool?”
Roman looks him over and laughs. “Dude, I hope you mean by one of the girls and not by you, because we all know that ain’t happening.”
“Seriously? Why do you guys always have to do me like that?” He removes his arm from my shoulder. “I’ll be at the bar getting a drink if you decide you’re brave enough to take me on. I’m not playing around tonight. Just watch.”
Roman laughs again. “Yeah, all right. I guess we’ll see how much you’re not playing pool.”
Stiles rolls his eyes and gives Roman the middle finger with both hands, mouthing, “Fuck you,” before slapping the bar and demanding a drink, which only has Mae laughing now.
“There’s the fucker now.”
I follow Roman’s gaze to the game room where Ben has just pulled out the chair next to Dakota’s. Neither one of them were there just moments ago, which has my mind going a mile a minute, trying to figure out what the hell they were doing.
It doesn’t help that the moment he notices me looking in his direction, his eyes lock on me as he moves his chair closer to Dakota’s, who’s too busy talking to Hope to notice.
I’m sure he can tell by the rage
in my eyes over their closeness that I know about their history, because a small smirk forms on his lips, before he turns away to join in on the girls’ conversation.
“Hey, cutie!” Mae slides a beer in front of me and twists the cap off with a smile. “Looking good in that shirt. Is that Roman’s? I swear I’ve seen it before.”
I nod and bring the bottle to my lips, taking down half the bottle in one gulp. “Yeah.”
“Well don’t tell him, but it looks better on you.” She hands me another beer. “Mind taking this over to Dakota? Hers is almost empty.”
“How many has she had?” I question, eyes on Dakota as she laughs about something Ben says. Seeing her react that way to him only pisses me off more.
“That there will be her second. She told me to keep them coming.”
“Let’s not keep them coming too fast, all right?” I dig into my wallet and slap a twenty down. “Close out her tab and put the rest of her drinks on mine.”
“Sure thing, babe.” She walks away to help another customer, so I grab Dakota’s beer and head in her direction.
She looks up just as I approach the table, her eyes meeting mine. She swallows nervously as I set the beer down in front of her and take a seat so that we’re directly across from each other.
We continue looking at each other in silence until the chair next to me moves and I glance beside me to see Sylvia’s dark, wavy hair surrounding me as she takes a seat. Fucking great. Fighting her off last night was exhausting enough without Dakota being there to see it. I don’t need this shit tonight.
“I’m so happy you made game night. I was hoping you’d come.” She takes a second to look me over as her hands go for my chest. “Someone is looking extra hot tonight. I’ll do my best to keep my hands to myself.” She winks, and from the corner of my eye, I catch Dakota reaching for her bottle and taking a long drink.
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