by Ashley Erin
“Fine you win.” Tilting the phone on my dresser so she can’t see me, I change quickly. The panties are lacy cheekies, selected because I favor this type of panty over all others and it was the only way I was agreeing to a more risqué top.
Kensi picked out a black corset that ties in front, spots where bare skin peeks out but still covering enough that I don’t feel completely naked. It’s lacy but not see-through over the breasts with a little frill peeking out at the top of the cup. After fighting with her for over half an hour she had put away an entirely see through one and found this one instead. Adjusting the phone again, I stand in front of her staring at my feet and fidgeting with the ties.
“Damn girl, your hard work is really paying off. I would totally do you and I’m straight. Well except for that time, you know.” She winks at me and I laugh.
“I just don’t feel like I pull it off.” Turning to look in the full length mirror, I examine myself. Maybe I do look kind of hot. “Ok, I have to admit, it’s kind of freeing wearing this.” Kensi claps her hands gleefully.
“I love that you’re coming out of your shell. It’s about damn time! Now, find those Silver jeans that make your ass look amazing and that cute oversized sweater. You look great in it and you won’t be able to see the corset through it. To top it off, if you’re outside, wear your black winter boots, that gorgeous black coat you bought last year, and finally your matching mittens, scarf and hat. Not the red one’s but those really cute purple ones.” Pulling out the clothes she is listing, I put them on and look at my reflection.
“Thanks Kens, I couldn’t have done this without you. Even with the stupid dare.”
“You know you feel hot! I miss you.” She smiles at me and in that moment I wish I could pull her through the phone.
“I miss you too. Fall Break can’t come quickly enough!” Glancing at my alarm clock, I swallow hard when I see I have less than 15 minutes before my date with Lucas. “Why do I feel so nervous? We’ve been dating for almost two months, shouldn’t it get easier?”
“Hun, it’s harder because you’re falling for him. You just haven’t realized it yet because you are the most oblivious person I know when it comes to your feelings for that boy. Go, finish getting ready. Enjoy your date. Have hot sex and then tell me about it afterwards because by the time I get laid again I’m going to forget what I’m doing.” We end the conversation and I collapse on the bed.
I’m falling for him? Wouldn’t I be aware of that happening? Standing shakily, I head to the bathroom to do my makeup and think about Lucas. Just his name makes me smile. Ever since I really got to know him, my initial assumption has been completely unraveled and thrown away. He is sweet, sexy, caring and creative. His passion and generosity in every aspect of our relationship makes me weak in the knees. Oh fuck. I am falling for him. Somewhere deep inside I knew this, I just had not admitted it to myself. I can’t deny it any longer.
My eyeliner falls from my hand as I stare at my reflection in the mirror. Eyes wide, hands shaking and heart pounding, I’m in shock. When did this happen? How did this happen? He completely weaseled his way in and is starting to steal my heart. My breathing picks up as I start to panic. I don’t know how to do this, I don’t even know if I CAN do this.
A knock on the bathroom door startles me and Dax peeks his head in. “Are you almost done?” His voice peters off as he takes in my panicked expression. Sliding in, he shuts the door behind him. Lucas must be here already. “Andie? Are you okay?”
Drawing in a shaky breath, I shrug and try to think of how to express what’s going on. I need to talk to someone and Dax is one of the three people I know I can turn to. One of four. Lucas needs to be counted in there. “I just had a realization and I’m processing because I honestly never thought it would happen.”
“You’re falling for Lucas.” Dax states this matter-of-factly and my jaw drops.
“How does everyone see this before I do?” Gasping, “Does Lucas know?”
“Lucas has no clue.”
“I just don’t know when it happened. Things are going well, but I’m always waiting for reality to come crashing in, taking away my happiness and proving my initial assumptions right. Then when I think of telling him things, I realize I want to, but the words don’t want to work with me. What if he hurts me? What if he doesn’t feel the same?” My fears are bubbling to the surface and they are spewing out as I speak softly to Dax. If Lucas is out there, I don’t want him hearing.
“Andie, even those of us who have gone through more hurt than we deserve will eventually find someone who believes we are worth loving. Now you just need to believe it too.” Dax kisses my forehead and turns to leave. “Lucas is here.” He leaves the bathroom and shuts the door.
Am I worth loving? On some level I’ve never thought so, maybe that’s why I’ve always dated guys like DB who I knew wouldn’t stick around. Part of me had still expected Lucas to bolt, on some level I’m still waiting for that to happen. My thoughts continue on this path as I quickly finish putting on a subtle amount of makeup and leave the bathroom.
Lucas stands from where he is seated on the couch and smiles appreciatively at me as I walk into the living room. His dimple peeks out and my heart starts fluttering. I do deserve to find someone to love me.
The me who has gone through hell at the hands of her father. The me who has placed all men in the category of asshole for years. The me who still doesn’t fully trust the man who is taking my heart. I just hope he believes it too.
Speechless as Andie smiles at me, I hop over the back of the couch and pull her into my arms. My lips seek out hers and she moans softly into my mouth as we kiss.
“Hellloooooooo! I’m right here and didn’t realize I was on the set of some high class porn movie. Dude, at least take my sister out before you maul her.” Dax’s humor filled voice teases us as I reluctantly pull away, laughing as Andie rolls her eyes and gives Dax the finger.
“Fuck you jackass. Let the man kiss me!” Andie teases him back and it’s moments like these that make me want to freefall into giving her the rest of me. She has opened up so much and seeing the playful sassy side to her is a huge turn on.
Laughing, I pull her to the door and hand her the snow shoes I bought for her today. “Do you have your winter gear? We’re going snow shoeing.” Excitement lights up her eyes and she runs to grab her coat, pulling it on. Once her hat, mittens and scarf is on, I wrap my hand around the back of her neck and pull her towards me, kissing her lightly on the lips.
“Beautiful.” She smiles and we head out the door, waving at Dax.
Setting off down the hiking trail, Andie gasps at the sight before us. The tiki lanterns flicker causing the snow to glitter where the light hits and shadows to dance where it doesn’t. They run along the shortest trail which loops in an oval. Periodically someone walks the trail to ensure they are still lit and they will be through to put them out by midnight.
“Wow.” Andie’s breath creates a cloud even through her scarf, her eyes sparkling in the light of the lanterns. Reaching over, I grab her hand and we start snow shoeing down the trail.
The snow softly falls around us and as Andie bends down scooping up some snow and throwing it at me before running away laughing, I realize that I’m no longer falling in love with her. I am in love with her. The freefall has ended with a crashing realization that this woman holds my heart in her hands.
The urge to pull her into my arms and tell her is strong, but something holds me back. She still hasn’t fully opened up to me and I worry she will bolt if I tell her and she isn’t ready. So instead, I ball up some snow and throw it back before chasing her and tackling her to the ground. Laughing, we wrestle and play in the snow before I pin her down and kiss her. Shivers run through me as her hands grip my shoulders and she deepens the kiss. Soon we are both shaking and not just from how turned on we are, but from the cold. Helping her up, we finish walking the trail hand in hand. The trail is so romantic, the soft sounds of our snow sh
oes stepping in sync on the snow, we are comfortably silent as we just enjoy being together.
“Lucas wait.” She stops me from leading her to the entrance of our building. “We need to make snow angels first.” Nudging me to go first, she pulls out her phone and snaps my picture as I move my arms and legs back and forth. Carefully standing so I don’t wreck it, I take my phone out and motion for her to do the same. We don’t have many photos together, Andie is shy in front of the camera, so I’m taking advantage of this moment.
I’ve noticed a shift in her this evening. It’s hard to say what exactly has changed, but she almost seems more confidant as though she is less worried I won’t accept what she is hiding and more faith in herself that it’s okay to be who she is. Looking at her as she carefully stands and moves away from her angel, those three words tease the tip of my tongue, but once again I swallow them back.
“This date has been perfect. Maybe one more picture with the two of us?” She softly suggests and I quickly pull her into my arms and hold out my phone before she can change her mind. The lights around our building illuminate us and we take the picture before going inside.
Our cheeks are flushed from the cold, droplets of moisture glisten all over our bodies from the snow melting and we both have big smiles that reach our eyes. My breath catches as I look at the photo and notice that Andie’s eyes are trained on me and not on the phone. Biting my tongue from spilling out the words that have decided they refuse to go away, I kiss her and show her the picture.
Sending her the photo in a text, I can’t help but smile as I realize it’s our first picture together. “It’s about time we have a photo together.” I tease her as we enter my apartment and I put the kettle on to boil water for hot chocolate.
“It’s going to be a tough one to top.” Andie hangs her coat and places her mittens and toque over the heat register to dry before grabbing mine and doing the same. She settles on the couch, her sweater falling off her shoulder which is bare. Is she not wearing a bra? Instantly aroused, my hands shake with desire as I make our hot chocolate and carry it to the couch. Andie smiles at me and we cuddle together and watch the snow out my living room window.
“I’m just going to the washroom real quick, I will be right back.” Watching her walk away makes my insides flop and my dick is standing at attention, waiting for her to come back. Leaning my head back against the couch, I close my eyes feeling more content than I can remember ever feeling.
Lips meet mine and Andie straddles me on the couch causing me to groan with desire, she has never taken control so boldly before. My hands move to her hips and I break away from her lips in shock, she’s only wearing her underwear. Opening my eyes, I meet her gaze. Her eyes are filled with anxiety and I wonder why she is anxious when she is the one calling the shots. She lowers her gaze and I follow her eyes down her body.
It takes a moment for my brain to register what my eyes are seeing. Andie is wearing the fucking hottest corset I have ever seen. If it wasn’t for experience and control, I would be coming in my pants at the sight of her.
“Holy shit.”
Devouring her with my eyes, my erection is straining against the restraint of my jeans. A guttural growl sounds from my throat as I pull my eyes away from her body and look into her eyes. Crushing my lips onto hers, I flip her onto her back and trail my lips down her neck to the curve of her breast bursting out of the corset. Teasing her with my tongue as my hands run up and down her thighs before gripping her hips and pushing my hard-on into her hot wet pussy, frustrated at the clothes that separate us.
“Do you have any idea what you do to me?” My words are rough with need and all traces of anxiety disappear from her eyes, lust and longing filling them instead. She shakes her head so I grind against her again, the friction from my jeans making both of us tremble and I revel in the moans escaping her throat. Standing, I scoop her into my arms and carry her to my room, the need to properly love her whole body filling every space of my mind.
She watches me as I undress swiftly before crawling up her body, kissing her ankle, up her calf, pausing to focus on the sensitive spot behind her knee and then up her thigh. She whimpers when I don’t stop and taste her, but I want to draw this out, slow and sweet. As I get to her collarbone, I trail kisses lightly all along it before devouring her neck and her lips. She curses me softly as I move back down her other side, but sighs with pleasure as I slowly pull her panties down her legs and toss them to the floor.
Blowing softly on her core, she squirms her body, begging me to quit teasing. Running my tongue over her pussy, she is dripping she is so aroused and I lose all self-control at her sweet taste, licking and sucking until her body is quivering.
I slowly take in the sexy as hell corset one more time before slowly untying it, my eyes meeting Andie’s and holding her gaze. Sliding it off her body, I reach over to my nightstand and grab a condom, quickly rolling it on before pushing into Andie’s tight core slowly, torturously. We are both breathing heavily as I lay over her and kiss her as we slowly move together. My body feels everything and I know I’m not going to be able to hold out much longer so I begin moving more quickly, teasing her clit with my fingers. She comes quickly and as her walls tighten around me, I thrust into her with my own release. Meeting her eyes as I slowly pull out, I lay beside her, kissing her face and gazing into her eyes. I love you.
Thursday afternoon I meet Lucas after class and make him rush with me to our building, Kensi is here! Running up the stairs to my apartment, I’m so excited to see Kensi that I dropped Lucas’s hand and left him at the bottom of the stairs. I can hear his laughter drifting up and heat unfurls in my belly. Shaking it off, I finally reach the top of the stairs and burst into my apartment, leaving the door wide open.
Kensi is sitting on the couch, folded up and chatting with Dax. Her blonde hair is pulled into a messy bun and she looks tired from the drive. Lunging over the top of the couch I throw myself on top of her, unearthly squeals coming from both of us. We both start talking at once and then collapse in a fit a giggles, gasping for air.
“Well this is eye opening.” Lucas’s teasing voice sounds from behind us and we both turn. Kensi’s eye widen and she turns to me.
“He is way hotter in person than over FaceTime. Seriously, you’re way hotter in person.” She turns back to Lucas and eyes him up and down until he is squirming. Despite knowing that Kensi is teasing and would never do anything, I can’t help the jealousy that coils in my stomach.
“Ok Kens, stop eye-fucking my boyfriend.” I teasingly jab her. She knows me too well and smirks at me and the jealousy behind my words. Turning back to Lucas, the smile on his face makes me blush. Busted.
Suitcases I didn’t see in my attempts to get to Kensi as quickly as possible litter my entryway and living room floor. “Seriously Kensi, how much shit do you need for a four day weekend?” There are approximately four suitcases and at least five boxes. She is eyeing me, waiting for it to sink in. “You’re here for good?”
“Yeah, I decided to finish the semester off via correspondence and stay with you until the apartment downstairs is ready.”
“That’s so fucking awesome! Let’s grab your stuff now and then we can catch up!” The guys help us haul Kensi’s belongings into my room. I notice Lucas looking around and it dawns on me that he has never been inside my room. Looking around my room with new eyes, I’m relieved I cleaned it today.
“I’m glad your room is free of traces from all your sexcapades.” Kensi looks around with pretend relief as she teases us. My cheeks heat up with a blush and I stare at my feet, shifting in place.
“Actually, this is the first time Lucas has been in here.” Meeting his eyes, I feel oddly apprehensive. I hope he didn’t take it personally.
“Yeah, I’m always around and they kindly keep their amorous activities confined in Lucas’s apartment.” Dax grimaces at Kensi, before winking at us.
Walking over to Lucas as Kensi and Dax stack boxes against the wall, I tu
ck myself into his side. “I’m sorry, I didn’t purposely keep you away.”
He chuckles and kisses me gently. “I know. It’s like I’ve finally been allowed into an exclusive club.” Dimples peek at me show that he is teasing and I relax.
“I don’t know how we’re going to fit all her crap in here. Maybe we should pop by housing and see if she can move into her apartment sooner. Her furniture still needs to go somewhere.” Lucas agrees and we excuse ourselves as Kensi continues to spread her stuff throughout my room.
Housing decided to allow Kensi to move into her place early. It’s Saturday morning and we’ve just finished hauling all of her stuff to the third floor.
“My furniture arrives Monday. I really appreciate you guys talking to housing, I guess I didn’t think my actions through all the way. I just needed to get here sooner.” Sadness rings her eyes and I am guessing her ex has something to do with the sudden decision. “Thanks Lucas for lending me the cot.”
“No problem, you were stealing Andie away from me, I needed to do something.” Her eyes lighten as she laughs and looks around. Each of the apartments are laid out exactly the same. Galley kitchen in the center, living room on one side and hallway to the bedrooms and bathroom on the other. The entrance way is centered between the kitchen and living room. At first I thought the set up was weird, but now I really find it handy, especially because the bedrooms feel so separate from the rest of the space.
“This is so much better than the dorm at Springbrook. My student loans transferred over no problem, but it would be nice to have a roommate to share the costs.” Kensi’s parents help her with her expenses, but she still needs to contribute. We both have been debating getting part time jobs to help ease the budgeting strain. Student loans and scholarships only go so far.