by t. h. snyder
I get out and dry myself off from head to toe. Pulling my hair out of the towel, I look in the mirror. My hazel eyes are trimmed in red and the bags under my eyes are bigger than they were yesterday. The stress of the past few months is seriously getting to me. There has to be a way to relieve myself of some burdens before I have a nervous breakdown.
My phone begins to chirp in the bedroom and I rush in to grab it before I miss the call.
“Hello?”
“Hey, Em,” my brother replies through the other end.
“Hey, tool! We still on for lunch today?”
“Yeah, about that, I think we need to seriously sit down and talk, Em. Can I just come over? I really don’t feel like having this conversation out in public.”
“Riley, what the hell are you talking about? What conversation can’t we have in public?” “Em, I’ll talk to you about it when I get there. I’m leaving a work site right now, thanks to your husband. He sent me out of town and I’m about two hours away from you.”
I start to say something back to him, but the line disconnects.
What the fuck was that all about? Why would Keith send him out of town and then pull him from another crew?
Things are really starting to get fucked up, and sooner or later I’ll have to intervene.
I go back to the bathroom and dry my hair, pull my eyeliner and mascara from the basket and apply my makeup. I head back to the bedroom and grab a pair of shorts and a tee shirt to get myself dressed.
Since I have all the time in the world now, I decide to tidy up the house and start some laundry.
After about two hours I’m finally done folding and putting away the last load. Shit, I hate this tedious chore.
By the time I make it downstairs the doorbell is ringing. I open the door to the disheveled shell of my little brother.
“Riley, what the hell happened to you?” I ask, moving to the side for him to come in.
He shakes his head while walking into the house. Riley pulls his Red Sox baseball cap off his head and runs his fingers through his short brown hair. He looks over at me with his hazel eyes, both trimmed with the same redness I just saw in my own a few moments ago.
“Come on, let’s go to the kitchen and I’ll make us something to eat.”
I move toward the kitchen and hear his footsteps following me.
“Is a sandwich okay?” I ask.
I reach into the refrigerator and pull out some cheese and cold cuts.
“Yeah, it’s fine. Do you have any of those sweet gherkins?” he asks, looking over to me with sad puppy dog eyes.
I nod my head and smile at him, “I even have your favorite sour cream ‘n onion chips, too.
“You know, you really are the best big sister, Em. You remind me so much of Mom that sometimes it hurts,” he says, taking a seat at the kitchen table.
“I miss them a lot, too, Riley.”
“Do you think I’m more like Mom or Dad?” he asks with a sad look on his handsome face.
“I think you are a lot like both of them, Riley, and they would be proud of you no matter what.”
I drop the conversation on that note and busy myself making us each a plate of turkey and cheese sandwiches with a pickle and a handful of chips.
“Can I get you something to drink?”
“Yeah, water’s fine. Thanks, Em.”
We sit in silence as we eat our lunch, but the curiosity of what he wants to talk about is killing me.
“So, what’s going on that you needed to come here to talk to me about?” I ask, looking across the table at him.
He sets down his bottle of water and pushes his empty plate away from him.
“Em, I’m having a real issue with the way things are being run at RPK Contracting and today was the straw that broke the camel’s back.”
“Why? What happened?” I ask, having no clue what’s been going on between Riley and Keith.
“Your fucking husband is what happened! Ever since Mom and Dad passed away he’s run that place like it’s his own. I’ve gotten cut from all of my crews but one and now I’ve lost that crew as of this morning.”
“What? How?”
“Em, I don’t want to put you in the middle of this, I really don’t. It’s bad over there and I don’t know what to do anymore. Last week I confronted Keith and told him I thought it was time for me to step in as part owner. I went to the bank and tried to take out a loan to buy him out, but I couldn’t get approved. I feel like everything I ever wanted is now gone, all because of your asshole husband.”
I put my head in between my hands and lean forward. I said from the start I didn’t want to get into this between them, but now I feel like I don’t have a choice. I know Riley is hurting and he’s my brother. I also know that my husband is running my father’s business, and if I choose to take Riley’s side it could ruin everything my father worked so hard to create.
I have a serious decision to make on what I want to stand behind. Either way, I’m going to hurt one of the most important men in my life. I never thought it would come to this, but now there is too much at stake for me to step back. I need to do something before the three of us lose it all. If Mom and Dad were here things would be so much different. Unfortunately, they aren’t and I’m the one who has to make one of the most difficult decisions of my life.
I look up at Riley—he’s so sad, he’s hurting—but there’s only one thing I can do to make all of this right. I just need to find the strength to do it knowing very well I will lose him in the process.
My nerves are peaking with what I’m about to tell my little brother. Knowing how hurt he’s been about losing his part of the family business is one thing, but I think I’m about to break his heart all together. I know it has to be done, I…no we can’t risk losing the business because of his faults. As much as he wants this to be his, it’s not worth the troubles he’s been causing.
I will stand by my husband and pretend to be the perfect wife. I’ll do whatever it takes to keep RPK Contracting running smoothly; it’s the least I can do for my parents. It’s the only thing I can do to keep their memories alive in this community. They were such a valuable asset to this town and loved by so many. I can’t have their name dragged through the mud because Riley is making errors on the job.
On nervous, wobbly legs, I get up to stand from the table and grab our empty plates. Standing on the other side of the kitchen I look over at my brother who is now gazing out the window.
I wish I knew what was going through his mind right now. I have no clue what’s gotten into him or why he’d jeopardize the reputation of the family business. We are both grieving over our loss, but he still has no excuse to throw away his job.
It’s now or never; I have to say something. My hands are shaking and my stomach is in knots. I can almost feel my lunch getting ready to come up and make an appearance all over the tile floor.
“Riley,” I say in almost a whisper.
He looks over at me and nods his head.
“I know that things have been tough since Mom and Dad passed away, it’s been really hard on all of us. Have you ever thought about stepping back from RPK for a while to see what else is out there for you?”
He looks at me with shock on his face.
“What the fuck did you just ask me?! Leave the business, or should I say what’s left of it, altogether?”
Pure anger comes across his face, and for the first time in a long time I don’t know how my brother is going to react to what I have to say next.
“Look, Riley, I sure as hell don’t want to cause an argument with you. I’m just saying with the lack of accountability you’ve had, it’s no surprise Keith has taken crews away from you.”
“Really, Em? Seriously! Are you fucking kidding me right now?!” he screams at me, throwing his hands up in the air. “I’ve done nothing but bust my ass on these crews and your fucktard of a husband is pulling me off my jobs. I haven’t done a damn thing wrong. I know this business in my sleep and
would never do anything to destroy what Dad and I worked so hard to create.”
“You’re obviously upset right now, Riley, and I can see that. It’s just that I don’t know if this is the kind of business you should be in anymore. I mean without Dad here it seems like you’ve fallen apart. We need someone to run RPK Contracting like Dad would have and right now I don’t think you’re the guy for the job. For Christ’s sake, Riley you’re still a kid. This is a serious business, do you really think you can be half the man Dad was at your age?”
As the words come out of my mouth I see the sword being pushed further into my brother’s heart. It’s too late to take it back; it’s been said, and by the look on my brother’s face, there’s no way I’ll ever be able to erase the words from his memory.
He moves to stand from the table and slams the chair against the wood.
“I’m glad to know how you really feel, Em. All this time I thought we were a family and would be able to get through these hard times together. Obviously I was way off. Well, don’t worry, I won’t burden you or your precious husband ever again. Don’t worry about showing me to the door; I don’t want you slamming it against my back on the way out. Good luck, Em, I hope you and your thief of a husband have a happy life together taking away what was rightfully mine.”
Riley grabs his hat from the table and storms out of my house.
I can’t move; my feet are like two blocks of cement. My mouth is hanging wide open. I’m hurt, shocked and at a loss from the conversation I just had with my little brother. Never in a million years would I have thought things would have ended this way. I mean, I knew we would argue, but I didn’t think he’d be hurting this badly.
There’s no point in running after him. As much as I wish I could’ve said something else to let him know how I was really feeling, it’s out in the open now.
I listen as Riley’s tires screech against the wet street in front of our house. With all the rain we’ve had the past few days, and the fact that it’s now getting darker, I hope he’s careful.
Good God, what have I done? I should’ve just stayed in bed today. I knew there was a reason I felt the way I did.
I begin to move my unstable legs and make my way back up to my bedroom. If nothing else, I can lie back down in my bed and drown in a puddle of my own tears. Not only do I have a husband that barely talks to me, but I just lost the only other man in my life that meant the world to me.
I curl up on my bed and pull the afghan over me that my grandmother had made for me and as a wedding gift. Closing my eyes, the last thing I see is the hurt in my brother’s hazel eyes.
My phone starts to chirp and I reach my arm around to find it. After searching through the covers, the noise finally stops.
I quickly sit up in my bed and look around my room. It’s now dark and I have no clue how long I’ve been sleeping. Looking to the bedroom window, I see that it’s still raining and now completely dark outside. The clock on Keith’s nightstand shows it’s well after seven o’clock.
Shit! I’ve been napping for more than three hours.
I finally find my phone on the floor and check for my last missed call.
The phone starts to chirp in my hand. I don’t recognize the number, but I still accept the call.
“Emma,” a male voice says.
“Yes, this is Emma.”
“Hey, it’s Ted from the club.”
“Umm, hey Ted,” I respond with uncertainty to my voice. “Er…umm…Keith’s not here. You may want to try his cell phone. Do you need the number?”
“No, Emma, Keith is here with me and the guys at the Batting Yard down on Wilson Avenue. Well actually, he’s passed out on the floor. It seems that Riley and Keith got into an argument and your brother beat the shit out him. I don’t know if it was the beers packing the punches or what, but your hubby is banged up pretty bad. You might want to get down here and get his ass to a hospital.”
“Are you kidding me right now, Ted, ‘cause this really isn’t a joking matter.”
“No, Emma, get down here as quickly as you can. We have him in the back office, but like I said, he may need medical attention. At least a few stitches if nothing else.”
“I’ll be right there and thanks for calling, Ted.”
This is fucking unbelievable and I hate to think that it’s entirely my fault.
I quickly gather my thoughts and hop out of bed. Running down the stairs, I pull on a pair of flip flops and head out the door.
The entire way over to the Batting Yard all I can think about is if I would’ve handled things differently with Riley this wouldn’t have happened.
I pull up to the bar and park in one of the front spots. As I’m walking to the door Ted comes out to meet me.
“Hey, Emma, good to see you, sorry you had to come down here like this. We tried to clean him up the best we could, but he’ still knocked out cold.”
I look over to him and wonder why a room full of grown men couldn’t help a friend out by taking him to the hospital.
I shake my head at him, “Where is he so I can get him home?” I ask in a bitter tone.
“Follow me,” he replies.
He takes me back to a hallway of closed doors. When he opens the last door on the right, a sight appears before me that I didn’t expect.
“Holy shit!” I scream. “You guys should’ve taken him to the fucking hospital, not called me to come here.”
I look at my husband lying on the cold tile floor of a bar room office.
His face, neck and shirt are covered in blood. For all I know his nose and jaw are broken.
“Emma, we didn’t know what you would have wanted us to do. If it were me lying on the floor, my wife would have wanted to be called first.”
“Well, thank God I’m not your wife, Ted, because I would be kicking your ass right now. How the hell am I supposed to get him to the hospital by myself?”
The two guys standing behind Ted must sense my anger; I’m sure as hell not holding it in.
“I’ll call for an ambulance.”
“Too little too late now, assholes,” I say through clenched teeth.
I crouch to the floor and attempt to wake Keith. After a few attempts of trying to wake him, he finally comes to and opens his eyes.
“Keith!” I yell. “You have some serious explaining to do, but right now I need to get you to the hospital. The guys here will be coming with me because there is no way in hell I can pick you up if you fall down.”
He nods his head, but doesn’t utter a word.
I point to the two guys behind Ted, “You and you, get your asses over here and help him up. Ted, help them get him in my car and follow me over to General Pines—that’s if you’re sober enough to drive.”
“Yeah, Emma, I’m good. I think the shock of all this has killed my buzz by this point.”
“Too fucking bad for you,” I reply. “Maybe the next time four grown men walk into a bar they’ll be smart enough not to get into a fight. Where the hell is my brother, anyway?” I look between Keith, Ted and the two other morons in the room.
“He took off after he gave Keith here his award winning knock out. Lucky for him, he left without a scratch on him.”
“Does anyone know where he went?” I ask.
The three guys shake their heads no and Keith just mumbles nonsense.
“Ugh, you’re all worthless, do you know that?”
Climbing to my feet, I brush off my hands and knees. I follow close behind as the three guys attempt to assist my dumbass of a husband out of the bar and into my car.
This honestly cannot be happening to me.
Mom, wherever you are, please give me the strength to make it through this night without killing one of these four men. God only knows the thoughts that are crossing my mind, and when I get a hold of my brother there will be serious hell to pay. I don’t care what the hell has happened in the past few hours, this is unacceptable.
The past week I’ve been living in hell.
Ever since the fallout between Riley and Keith, I’ve been walking on eggshells in my own home. The slightest look in the wrong direction is setting Keith off and my cell phone rings nonstop with calls from my brother.
I’m exactly where I don’t want to be: stuck in the middle of these two men.
No matter how much Keith says Riley attacked him that night at the bar, I still don’t understand what would make him so angry that he’d go off like that. Riley’s never hurt so much as a fly; it was all so out of character for him.
Keith felt so defensive about the whole fight that he banned Riley from RPK Contracting all together. If Riley so much as steps foot on the property or a crew site, he’s to be immediately removed.
In my opinion, Keith has taken things too far, but with everything else going on I’m keeping myself out of it. Not only is Keith pissed off about the actions my brother took against him, but he’s livid the way I treated his friends at the bar. I feel like I’m in an episode of the Twilight Zone and there’s nowhere for me to escape.
Thankfully, some of the ladies from the club were meeting for lunch, and after much hesitation I decided to join them. It was nice to get out and socialize with a group of old friends, that’s until I’d had enough of them. Hearing their happy love stories and plans of summer family vacations started to piss me off. Feeling self-pity is one thing, but having these ladies drudge up the latest gossip about my life was enough for me. After a few hours of cucumber sandwiches and cocktails I decided to head home and organize my life.
When I pull up to the driveway, I see Keith’s car parked in the garage and a sick feeling starts to form in the pit of my stomach. I hate the fact that just the thought of him churns my gut.
I know deep down I love my husband, but after all we’ve been through the past few months I honestly can’t stand the sight of him anymore. I feel as though I’ve been living with a different man. He’s rarely ever home and when he is there’s a constant argument about something.
I’ve been trying to get into RPK Contracting for the past few months to go through Dad’s office, but for some reason or another Keith wants me nowhere near the place. Legally, this business is mine, too; I have every right to come and go as I please.