Harry swung his son around and plopped him onto the bed before tickling him in all the places Oliver loved. “Where do you get all this energy, huh?” he asked, mussing Oliver’s hair. “I wish you could give me some.”
“Maybe this will help,” Zoey said.
Harry looked up. She stood in the doorway of his bedroom, a mug of coffee in her hand. Even after only four hours of sleep, she looked rested and beautiful. Her hair was pulled back into a ponytail, and her face was bare, different than the glamorous look she’d worn the night before. But she was no less stunning.
She crossed the room and handed him the mug, her eyes roving over his bare chest and shoulders. “I tried to keep him busy hoping you were still sleeping, but once he realized you were awake, there was no keeping him from you.”
Harry ran a hand across his face. “That’s okay. I’ve been up a little while.” He took a sip of the coffee then placed it on the small table beside his bed. “How are you? Exhausted?”
She offered a small smile. “Not too bad.”
He reached for her from where he sat on the edge of the bed, curling an arm around her waist and pulling her close. At the same time, Oliver climbed onto his back, nuzzling his face into Harry’s neck, and reached a tiny hand out, curling it over Zoey’s shoulder to loop them in an awkward three-way hug.
Warmth bloomed in Harry’s chest. He’d missed feeling like a family. Feeling complete.
Hannah stumbled in a few minutes later. “Why are we all hanging out in here?” she asked, climbing onto the bed.
“Because your Dad was out super late last night,” Zoey said. “But now he’s got to get ready for work which means we need to go get some breakfast.”
She scooped Oliver into her arms and reached for Hannah’s hand. “Are you hungry?”
Hannah hardly looked Harry’s way before taking Zoey’s hand and following her to the kitchen. Contentment settled over him. His kids really did love Zoey.
Charlotte’s warning from a few weeks before pinged in his mind. It would likely devastate the kids if Zoey decided to go back to Chicago. Even though it had only been a month and a half, she was fully integrated into their lives. The kids trusted her, relied on her. Once the week before, Oliver had fallen and bumped his head and ran to Zoey instead of Harry for comfort. She’d said she wasn’t going anywhere the night before, and he trusted her. But for how long? That she didn’t want to talk about Chicago made him nervous, yet he wasn’t sure he wanted to push her. If he pushed too hard, would it do the opposite of what he wanted and push her away?
Still, Charlotte had been right. He had to think about his kids’ feelings. What was best for them? It was so much more complicated than just what he wanted.
After showering and getting ready, he found Zoey and the kids in the kitchen. He moved to the sink and rinsed out his coffee mug. “What do you guys have planned for the day?” he asked.
“I want to go see Spencer,” Hannah said from her place at the table. She scooped up a big bite of cereal. “Can we, Zoey? Can we go see Spencer?”
Zoey looked at Harry, an eyebrow raised. “Would Charlotte care?”
Spencer was Charlotte’s second oldest and was one of Hannah’s closest friends. She’d likely been missing hanging out with her cousin.
“Actually, she might appreciate a visit today. She texted this morning and she’s feeling really terrible. Morning sickness. And Brian’s out of town and I don’t know. She seemed pretty low. It’d probably be nice for her to have someone else around to help with the kids.”
Zoey didn’t respond right away, and Harry wondered if he’d overstepped by asking. Was it too familiar of a thing for her to do? They’d hung out with Charlotte a few times, and it seemed like the women got along, but tripling the number of children in Zoey’s care was a big ask.
“Are you asking like a boyfriend, wanting his girlfriend to help out his pregnant sister? Or are you asking as an employer who needs his nanny to watch his nephews for the day?”
Harry grinned. She’d said boyfriend.
“What?” Zoey said, mirroring his smile. “Why are you smiling?”
“Because you said boyfriend.”
She pursed her lips and folded her arms. “I did, didn’t I?”
Harry stepped close to her and rested his hands on her hips. He leaned in and kissed her quickly, not wanting to linger with the kids just behind them. “I would never pressure you into watching four extra kids all day as my girlfriend or as my nanny. I won’t be mad if you want to chill here all day and relax. Especially after how little sleep you got last night.”
“But?”
“No buts. Genuinely. I already had Jason order Charlotte some groceries, and I had a green smoothie delivered to her house for breakfast. I honestly wouldn’t have even thought about you going over there had Hannah not mentioned Spencer.”
Zoey nodded. “You’re a good brother. You know that, right?”
Harry lifted one shoulder into a shrug. It had been too many years since he’d had the bandwidth or the appropriate perspective to be as good a sibling to Charlotte as she had been to him. “Just making up for lost time,” he said.
Chapter 13
Just before lunch, Zoey ended up going over to Charlotte’s after all. Not because she felt any sort of pressure from Harry to go, but because Hannah had been particularly clingy all morning. Playing with her cousins might give Zoey a little bit of a break. She’d thought about texting Ashley to see if Rowan was available to play, but she wasn’t sure she was quite ready to face Harrison Beckford’s adoring public so soon after their appearance at the charity event. Ashley had been cool, but a picture of Harrison and Zoey had already been featured on multiple entertainment news sites that morning. It just felt safer sticking to family members who already knew the ins and outs of their relationship.
Charlotte’s oldest son let Zoey and the kids in. “Mom’s in her bedroom,” he said. He pointed down the hall. “That way.”
Zoey put Oliver in the living room where the Disney Channel was showing reruns of his favorite cartoon. After asking the other kids to keep an eye on him, she went to find Charlotte.
“Charlotte?” Zoey called from the bedroom door.
Charlotte appeared in the bathroom doorway, a rag pressed to her face. Dark circles lined her eyes and strands of damp hair clung to her forehead.
“Hey,” Zoey said, compassion filling her voice. “That bad, huh?”
Charlotte collapsed onto her bed. “I’ve seriously thrown up so many times in the past week. It’s the worst. I’m so hungry, but nothing sounds good.”
“Harry told me you weren’t feeling good. I’m going to stay a few hours if that’s okay. I’ll feed the kids. Get them outside for a little bit. Is there anything else I can do for you?”
Charlotte shook her head. “Even just that is amazing. Thanks for coming over.”
“It’s not a big deal. Hannah’s been missing Spencer anyway.”
Charlotte smiled. “Those two are the cutest. They’ve been like that since they were tiny.”
Zoey picked up Charlotte’s water bottle from her nightstand. “Can I refill this for you?”
“Yes, please.”
After a quick trip to the kitchen, with a slight detour through the living room to check on Oliver, Zoey took the filled bottle back to Charlotte. She paused in the doorway when her phone beeped with an incoming message. She pulled it out of her back pocket and froze.
The message was an email from Channel 4 in Chicago. They liked the clips she’d sent in. And they wanted her to come in for an interview as soon as possible. She forced a breath in through her nose and out through her mouth. She didn’t have to respond right away. It’s not like they’d given her a specific day they wanted to see her. They’d just said as soon as possible. That could mean within a week, even two weeks, couldn’t it?
She pushed the worry from her mind. She for sure couldn’t figure things out while she was hanging out with Harry’s sister.
“I saw the pictures,” Charlotte said as Zoey set the water bottle down. “From last night. You guys make a cute couple.”
“Thanks.” She sat on the edge of Charlotte’s bed. “I’ve been afraid to look at them.”
“I bet. I’m sure it’s overwhelming to see yourself all over national entertainment news. But from what I’ve seen, it’s all complimentary. A lot of stuff about people being happy to see Harry dating again. Speculation about how long you’ve been together, whether or not there are wedding bells in your future.”
“Oh, geez. That might be a little premature.”
Charlotte smiled. “I don’t know. Harry tends to fall hard and fast into everything he does. It might not be as far off as you think.”
Zoey looked at her hands, squeezing them into fists in her lap. How was she supposed to respond to that?
“Can I be honest for a sec?” Charlotte asked.
Zoey looked up and met her eyes. “Of course.”
“He really likes you, Zoey.”
Zoey bit her lip. He loved her, even. He’d nearly told her as much the night before.
“He hasn’t dated that much since the divorce. Definitely not anything serious. But it seems like things are different with you. He’s different. I know you didn’t come to California planning to stay. And that’s totally your thing. I’m just worried about his kids. I don’t want Harry to get hurt, but I worry more about Hannah and Oliver. The more they spend time with you and the more they see you and Harry together, the harder it’s going to be for them to understand what’s going on.”
Zoey shook her head. “I know that. I’m not trying—”
“I’ve mentioned this to Harry, too,” Charlotte said, cutting her off. “I know he doesn’t want to pressure you because he doesn’t want to push you away. But you can’t string him along, Zoey. If you aren’t planning on sticking around? He deserves to know.”
Zoey tensed, trying to fight the defensiveness rising inside her. It’s not like she’d been dating Harry for months and months. It had been weeks.
“It feels really early in our relationship for me to feel that kind of pressure,” Zoey finally said, happy that her voice sounded so steady. “I’m not stringing him along. It hasn’t even been two months.”
“I know,” Charlotte said. “It isn’t really fair. But it is what it is, and it’s definitely more complicated because the kids are involved and because you never intended to be here full time. If it were me making the decisions, I wouldn’t have told the kids the two of you were dating. Just to make it easier on them should you decide to leave.”
Zoey sighed. “I had that thought. But Harry seemed so sure. So much of the time we spend together is with the kids. He didn’t want to have to pretend.”
“I get that. Harry also tends to give everyone and every situation the benefit of the doubt without always thinking through the consequences. Plus, when he finds something or someone that he’s passionate about, he’s all in. I’m sure he’s mostly thinking about the future you guys could have once you decide to stay.”
“You mean, if I decide to stay.”
“That’s just it,” Charlotte said. “You’re saying if. I’m saying if. My hunch is that Harry is saying when.”
“We haven’t had the conversation though.”
“Which means you haven’t told him you’re leaving, but you also haven’t told him you’re staying. Like I said. He’s an eternal optimist. Prone to giving everyone the benefit of the doubt.”
Zoey stifled a frustrated laugh. “Does the man not have any flaws? Any walls that he hides behind?”
Charlotte tilted her head thoughtfully. “He’s pretty transparent. Granted, he made some stupid decisions when he first got famous. And his priorities were all kinds of messed up. But he’s been so much better the past year or so.”
“Yeah. He’s told me about that a little. About how much he’s changed.”
“Zoey, look. I don’t want to pressure you into making a decision right now. Just, be careful, okay? Think about the kids, too. And maybe talk to Harry about your decision. If you guys are a couple, you should make it together, right?”
Zoey did think about the kids. And about Harry. And about how much she didn’t want to lose them. But she still couldn’t bring herself to tell Channel 4 she wasn’t interested. It felt so final. So . . . life changing. There would be other jobs. And Harry was right that she could always try and find a job in Los Angeles. But she’d worked so hard to establish herself in Chicago. And the Channel 4 job was the job she’d been thinking about for years. Starting over felt huge.
For three days she stared at the email, unable to respond.
Harry noticed she was distracted.
Nana noticed she was distracted.
Even Hannah asked her why she was always staring into space and not talking.
Zoey hardly knew how to answer. She was paralyzed. Overwhelmed. Terrified of making the wrong decision.
On Thursday morning, she took the kids to Park Play, deciding they needed the entertainment—she’d hardly been on her A-game the past few days—and since she’d have to face the mommy brigade eventually, she might as well go ahead and get it over with.
It took less than five minutes for Rebecca to descend upon her, ushering her into the circle of moms sitting next to the sandbox.
“Okay,” Rebecca said. “Tell us everything. You’ve obviously been keeping some secrets.”
“Lay off,” Ashley said, immediately coming to Zoey’s defense. “Can you blame her? We circled like vultures the first time we met her.”
“Vultures is maybe a little harsh,” Rebecca said. “Come on. Spill it. You were gorgeous, by the way. Loved the dress. But why didn’t you tell us? How long have you been dating?”
Zoey forced a smile. “I, um, it’s complicated.”
“But you are dating, right?” Rebecca said.
“I thought that was pretty obvious after all the pictures and everything,” Zoey said.
Rebecca closed her eyes. “Seriously. I’m so jealous. So tell us how it happened. And also, how does a news anchor from Chicago end up working as a nanny in California? I’ve been trying to figure that part out for days.”
At least that was a question Zoey could answer. “I’m here taking care of my grandmother. She’s recovering from a stroke and she needed someone to be with her in the evenings and on the weekends. I’m between jobs, so nannying felt like an easy thing to do to cover my expenses while I’m here.”
“Right. So you just casually looked for a nannying job and started working for Harrison Beckford?”
“He’s a friend of my grandmother’s,” Zoey explained. “I wasn’t looking for a nannying job.”
“Do you think you’ll go back to Chicago?” Ashley asked. The gravity in her voice told Zoey she didn’t ask the question lightly or just out of curiosity. Zoey sensed Ashley understood the multilayered nature of the question.
Before she could respond, Rebecca scoffed. “Are you kidding? Why would she leave now? She’s dating Harrison freaking Beckford.”
Ashley rolled her eyes. “Because her life is in Chicago. Her career is there.”
“But she could move her career,” another woman said, this one someone Zoey had never spoken to before. “Better yet, just give it up. She’s with Harrison now. That’s all I’d need if it were me.”
“No joke,” Rebecca said. “Plus, there are already two kids to take care of. That’s basically a full-time career as it is. Why work if she doesn’t have to?” Rebecca suddenly stood up, yelling across the playground as she ran after a little girl Zoey could only assume was her kid.
Zoey looked back at Ashley, fighting the panic rising in her throat. She’d been battling her fears since her conversation with Charlotte earlier that week. But Rebecca’s comments seemed to ratchet everything up a notch.
“Hey, Harrison could afford another nanny,” Ashley said calmly. “It’s not like if you keep dating him you have to be an insta
-mom.”
But she would be, wouldn’t she? She didn’t need a degree in psychology to recognize that she’d filled a hole in Hannah’s life by being with her every day. The last few days, they’d spent hours talking about kindergarten coming up in a couple of weeks. About all the things Hannah was afraid of, all the things she was excited about. They’d talked about first-day-of-school outfits and whether or not she wanted her dad to walk her all the way into her classroom or just drop her off at the door of the school like all of the bigger kids.
Hannah had even called her from Harry’s phone before bed the night before so she and Oliver could say goodnight to her before they went to sleep.
It was too late to backpedal now.
Zoey had always dreamed of having a family. But in her head, it had always been something she would build slowly. She’d meet the guy. Fall in love with the guy. Marry the guy. Build the career. Buy the house. Then have a baby. When she felt ready. Jumping into a ready-made family with both feet, especially when her entire Chicago life was on the line was a big ask, even if the asker was the famous Harrison Beckford.
“Well, speak of the devil,” Rebecca said, lowering her sunglasses and staring at something over Zoey’s shoulder.
Zoey turned and saw Harry climbing out of his truck. She quickly stood and crossed the playground to meet him.
“Hey,” he said as she approached.
She stopped in front of him. “Hi. What are you doing here?”
“I finished early. I thought we could take the kids somewhere together. To the zoo, maybe.” He looked over her shoulder. “Would it help or hurt your situation if I kissed you hello?”
Zoey shrugged. “What if you just kiss me hello because I want you to?”
He grinned. “That is a good enough reason.” He leaned down, his hand lingering on the small of her back while his lips pressed against hers. The intensity of the kiss caught Zoey by surprise. It wasn’t a hello peck; it was more of a steamy, hey baby kind of kiss. Zoey was pretty sure more than one of the moms behind her gasped out loud.
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