by C L Lassila
Mary walked through the brush, coming out of the forest behind the recently constructed whore house. It was a modest, two story wood frame house with a small porch on the back. It had not yet been painted and was still the color of the wood planks from which it was constructed. The snow that had begun to fall was blowing sideways across the lawn as Mary walked up to the back steps. A house of ill morals was where she would fit she thought.
With snow clinging to her eye lashes she knocked on the back door. A young negro girl in a yellow dress opened the door and stood staring at Mary.
“Miss Pauline,” the girl yelled.
A statuesque woman with blonde hair walked into the room.
“Minnie, close that door. You are letting the cold air in,” the woman addressed the girl in a stern voice. “Lord knows it’s cold enough in here all ready.”
Miss Pauline came and stood in front of Mary, studying the girl.
“What is it that you want, girl?” she asked.
Mary stood quietly looking at the floor.
“Are you a mute? I must say that you are a pretty thing. But we can’t be having any babies here. You can come back and work here after you are done with that,” Miss Pauline said in a sharp tone. “We will be busy in the spring. Come back then. I’ll need more girls.”
Mary still had not said a word. She stood and looked at the floor.
Miss Pauline brushed by her and opened the door.
“Get now,” she said. “Get on out of here.”
Mary turned around and walked back out into the cold. The door slammed behind her. Not knowing where to go she sat down on the steps. She pulled her knees up under her coat and sat huddled against the door with the wind driven snow swirling around her.
****
The snowfall had become blinding and the wind was so fierce that Jonas had no choice but to stop the men. It had become too hazardous to continue. With the visibility practically nil and struggling to maneuver along an almost indiscernible path with a stretcher, it had become impossible to continue. They would have to look for a minimum of shelter, enough to provide a break from the wind so that they could start a fire. Jonas knew that the situation he and the men were in was a dangerous one. They inched their way forward hoping to find something that would provide shelter but soon they found themselves in whiteout conditions. They would have to make whatever shelter they could out of the nearby trees.
****
Adelaide woke up in the middle of the night and saw that the fire in the fireplace had been reduced to little more than embers. The wind was still howling outside and the loss of the flames had caused the room to grow cold. Reluctantly she slipped from the warmth of the bed to rebuild the fire. As she placed small sticks on the embers the flames began to grow and she immediately felt their warmth. When the flames were high enough she placed two large pieces of wood in the fireplace to feed the blaze until morning. She stood up to place the screen back in front of the fire when suddenly she felt a piercing pain in her abdomen.
The pain was so intense that it caused her to double over. Although she felt chilled her body broke out into a sweat. Adelaide managed to get back to the bed. Lying on her side in the fetal position she pulled the blankets over her. The sharp pain in her stomach continued.
Darwin, who could sense that something was wrong, stood up on the bed and began to lick her face.
“Lie back down, Dar,” she told the dog. “I’ll be all right.”
****
Mary didn’t know how long she had stayed huddled up by the door of the whore house. She had stayed there unnoticed until the young negro girl Minnie came out to empty the chamber pot.
“You still here?” she said. “You better get. Miss Pauline don’t want you around here. And she be mean when she get mad.”
Mary stood up as Minnie threw the contents of the chamber pot past her and into the snow. She was freezing cold anyway. Stamping her feet she tried to shake off some of the snow that covered her. She walked down the stairs and headed off into the storm. No one would be at the church. She would go there.
****
Jonas and the men did what they could to try and find some shelter in the trees. Any protection from the wind and snow would be welcome. They moved a short way off of the path into a small thicket of evergreens. The wind whipped the branches that provided just a minimum of shelter. It would be impossible to start a fire. Their hope was that the wind would soon die down. Until then they would huddle together and completely cover themselves with the few blankets that they had with them.
The stretcher was set on the ground and the seven men surrounded it, hunching down close to one another. John Mallard had been covered in a blanket while being carried and that blanket remained in place. The other blankets were removed from the men’s bedrolls and pulled over their heads to create a makeshift tent. The relentless wind tore at the blankets and the men had to hold them tight. John Mallard’s whiskey bottle was passed around, each man taking a sip. They sat in silence, covered by the blankets, some of them rocking back and forth in an attempt to keep warm. Not one of them wanted to admit the fear that he was feeling.
****
Calix had returned to Lanse Township. He had made the difficult choice to leave Copper Harbor without seeing Adelaide again. He did not want to disrupt her life by having Jonas possibly discover them together. Even though he was aware of the reality of their relationship, it had become difficult to leave her. And now he was missing her more than he had when they were separated in the past.
He had been traveling with Ten Crows. The two of them spent a short time in Lanse where they did some day work and engaged in some trading and gambling before heading on to Calix’s cabin. Ten Crows, who was staying with Calix for a few days before returning to his village, had noticed a change in his friend, who had been obviously distracted since they had left Copper Harbor. Although Calix was an individual who was prone to periods of contemplation, he had been unusually quiet on the trip. The two men had sat down to supper, when Ten Crows decided to address the situation.
“If you leave a place and you leave so much of yourself behind that you are no longer a whole man, maybe the place that you left is the place that you are meant to be,” Ten Crows said.
Calix looked at him.
“What?” he asked.
“Your heart and your mind are back in Copper Harbor,” Ten Crows continued. “Maybe it is time that you had a wife.”
“She is with another man, Ten Crows,” Calix said.
“But is he the man that she belongs with?” Ten Crows asked.
Calix looked at his friend and shook his head. He then began to laugh. “Where’s the whiskey bottle?” he said.
****
The night shirt that Adelaide was wearing had become drenched in sweat, yet she still could not get warm enough. She focused her eyes on the shadows dancing on the wall and tried to not think about the pain that she was feeling. Eventually she was able to sleep for a while.
An intense, stabbing pain brought her back to consciousness. She pulled her knees up to her body trying to find some relief from the discomfort. Suddenly she felt a warm, wetness between her thighs. She pulled one of the quilts from where it lay covering her and shoved it between her legs. Adelaide raised herself up but the room began to spin. The feeling of light headedness made her lie back down. As she set her head down she fixed her eyes on the dancing shadows. The faintness overtook her. Everything slipped into blackness.
****
Mary, battling against the strong wind and almost blinded by the snow, somehow found her way to the church. When she pushed open the wooden door she could hear Reverend Fay’s words, “I now pronounce you husband and wife.” They reverberated in her mind. “I now pronounce you husband and wife, I now pronounce you husband and wife, I now pronounce you husband and wife,” over and over again.
The snow had transformed her into a figure in white. The heavy, wet snow coated her bonnet and covered her coat and dress, but
Mary was oblivious to it. She walked into the church and closed the door behind her. Very little light could penetrate the snow covered windows, leaving the church in darkness. As Mary walked down the aisle, in her mind she saw Nathan in front of the altar holding hands with the woman who had taken him away. She hated that woman and she hated god.
Mary knew where the reverend kept the matches and candles. Off of the sanctuary was a small room that the reverend used as a sacristy. There, in a small, roughly hewn, wooden box were the items that she was seeking. Within the wooden box she found the medal box that contained the matches and opened it. As she struck the match the odor released by the chemical reaction filled her nostrils. Selecting one of the candles from the box, she placed its wick into the small, flickering flame and watched as the circle of light provided by the match amplified. When the heat produced by the small fire burning on the matches’ head reached her fingers, Mary let the match drop. She raised the smarting finger to her mouth and with the candle in the other hand she walked back into the sanctuary.
****
Eventually the whiskey bottle was empty. The cramped men, confined beneath the blankets which were providing only scant protection, tried to move their limbs without disturbing the blankets or the other men too much. It was impossible to ward off the cold. John Mallard had stopped moaning, perhaps the result of the whiskey. Jonas suggested to the men, all of whom he knew to be fellow Methodists, that they pray. They all began to speak in unison. John Mallard was the only one to remain silent. Their voices joined together until they became one voice, reciting the words that each man knew so well.
“Our Father which art in heaven, hallowed be thy name, thy kingdom come, thy will be done, in earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive them that trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen”
When the prayer was finished they said it again. They kept repeating the words until it became a chant. Over and over again they said, “Our Father, who art in heaven…” The words were recited in a rhythmic fashion. The men found comfort in the words. The chanting allowed them to lose themselves in the words and the saying of them. It offered a temporary escape, a distraction from the physical discomfort and fear that the men were feeling.
Over the next several hours, whenever one of the men felt himself succumbing to despair, he would begin to sing those comforting words. The others would join in and together they would fight off despondency. By appealing to god, by praying, they felt that they had the power to affect the outcome of their present situation, a situation in which they were at the mercy of the elements. But in the praying they found hope.
****
There were candles on the altar. Mary lit them one by one, touching the wicks with the lit candle that she carried. As each wick caught fire she watched the flames join together and flare up, dancing in the draft that blew in from the sacristy. Mary moved over to the lectern where the reverend’s bible sat. She held the candle over it and watched the wax drip onto the black leather cover. The wax fell onto the letters printed in gold and slowly, as the drops continued to fall, the words ‘Holy Bible’ disappeared from view. Mary opened the bible and held the candle over the page. She lowered the candle closer and closer to the beautifully printed paper. The edge of the gold rimmed page began to turn black and curl up upon its self. Mary pulled the candle away.
At the end of each pew, standing in a neat stack, were the hymnals. As Mary walked back down the aisle she became aware of the weight of her coat and dress. The snow that had been covering them when she came in from outside had all melted. Her garments was now soaking wet. She moved a stack of hymnals from the pew down onto the floor setting them in the center of the aisle. She knelt down next to them and opened the book at the top of the stack. Lowering the candle she held it at the edge of the page and watched as the flame of the candle blackened the paper and then spread to the book. She stood up and walked back toward the altar.
A strong draft suddenly blew out the candle that she was holding. But the church was illuminated. Bothered by the weight of her coat and dress she undid the garments and let them fall to the floor. Now free of the burden of her wet clothing she returned to the altar. Smoke was coming into the church from beneath the door of the sacristy. Mary removed a candle from its place on the altar and walked to the lectern. Holding the candle close to the page she read the words that had now lost all meaning to her. She was pleased as she watched the char crawl up the page and then grow into a flame. She sat down in front of the altar and pulled her knees up to her chest. With her arms wrapped around her knees, she began to gently rock back and forth, singing in a small voice, “Jimmy crack corn and I don’t care. Jimmy crack corn and I don’t care. Jimmy crack corn and I don’t care. My masters gone away”
****
Adelaide awoke to a room lightened by the dawn of a new day. Darwin was standing on the bed licking her face. The pain in her stomach had subsided somewhat but her bedding and night shirt were damp. As she sat up she felt weak, but she knew that she had to rebuild the fire and get out of the wet shirt and bedding. She took a moment to garner her strength and listened to the rooster crowing. The chickens had made it through the storm. When the rooster had finished his morning greeting she noticed the silence. The windows were no longer rattling. The raging wind had quieted down. Perhaps the storm had passed.
Adelaide pushed herself to get out of bed. When she threw aside the blankets and quilts that had been covering her, she saw the quilt that had been down between her legs. It was stained red, soaked in her blood. Trying not to panic, she steadied herself as Darwin jumped up onto the bed and began to sniff at the quilt. She pulled her legs from around the blanket. Sections of the fabric had dried and had adhered to her skin. After loosening those sections, she threw her legs over the side of the bed and stood up. Darwin had continued to sniff the bedding.
“Leave it, Dar,” she said. “Let’s go.”
The first thing that Adelaide needed to do was build the fire back up. She felt dizzy for a moment after standing up, but that passed. Darwin followed her to the fireplace where she coaxed the embers back into a blaze. The immediate warmth cast by the flames was welcome.
“Well, Dar,” she said. “You probably want to go outside.”
She reached out and scratched the dog behind the ear. Pulling herself to her feet she pulled the blood stained night shirt off, over her head. It was startling to see the blood dried on her thighs. Adelaide attempted to wipe her thighs clean with the shirt but the blood had dried. She would wash later. She moved quickly to dress, knowing that the rest of the house would be cold. As she tied her boots she looked over at the bed, she would deal with the soiled bedding later too.
Adelaide once again felt lightheaded as she walked into the next room. She braced herself against the wall. She would find the strength to do what she had to do. In the kitchen, she took a dipper of water from the bucket and filled a bowl for Darwin. She then poured some of the cold water into a cup and sat down while she drank it. Summoning a second wind she got up and went to the stove. The fire had gone out during the night, so she pulled a chair over and sat down while she worked to ignite the kindling and get the fire blazing. It seemed that anything that she did drained the small reserve of energy that she possessed. So she sat for a moment.
Darwin was standing by the back door, waiting to be let out. Wondering where she was, he walked into the kitchen and looked at her before turning and walking back to the door.
“I’ll be right there, Dar,” she said.
After putting on her coat, Adelaide opened the door to let Darwin outside. Much of the snow had been blown from the porch by the strong winds, but the stairs were buried. Darwin walked back and forth along the porch nervous about the snow. Adelaide took a broom and started to brush the heavy snow from the steps. Winded from the exertion, she stopped and looked out at a white world. The wet snow clung to almost every su
rface, painting the trunks of the trees, the shed and the barn white. The sky had not yet cleared. A few flakes still fell, drifting gently to the ground. There was very little color in the landscape. Then Adelaide heard the familiar caw of the crows. One flew down and attempted to land in the snow not far in front of her but startled by its depth it flew up to the roof of the chicken coop. Adelaide stepped off of the porch into snow up to her knees. She pushed through it to the spot where the crow had landed and stopped to admire the design left by its wings when they brushed over the snow’s surface. After just a few steps she was exhausted. It would take a long time to get anything accomplished today.
Darwin had done what he needed to do and had already returned to the porch.
“Too much snow for you, Dar?” Adelaide said, laughing at the dog’s lack of enthusiasm. “Crows be patient. I will have something for you in a bit,” she continued before going back inside of the house.
Knowing that she did not have the energy required to draw water, she filled a bucket with snow and set it inside to melt. She would bring it out to the chickens later. The coffee had warmed and after building a fire in the fireplace that heated the main room, she sat and drank a cup before attempting to make breakfast. She had diverted her thoughts from the blood stained bedding. Although she felt weak, the pain in her stomach had subsided and the chills and sweats that she endured last night had not carried over into the morning.
Breakfast was last night’s stew, reheated, and left over bread. Darwin happily emptied his bowl, his tail wagging. He then went to lie in his favorite spot by the fireplace. Before sitting down to eat herself she took a large piece of bread to place outside for the crows. Not knowing if they would land on the soft snow to eat, she broke it apart and left the pieces on the back steps certain that they would come down to eat once she had gone back indoors.