He had expected her to look twenty years older, in her mid-forties, but she looked closer to seventy. Years of drug abuse and prostitution had ground her body down to a shell of a woman. Her hand trembled as she leaned against the table and sat down. Her head shook slightly with an almost constant tremor.
Replacement took his hand in hers. He didn’t move. The woman who had haunted a thousand of his dreams sat only a few feet from him, but it was all wrong. In his mind, he’d always had this conversation with the mother he remembered: a strong, beautiful young woman who was supposed to protect him and hadn’t. As he looked at this broken husk of a person, anger clawed its way to the surface and burned inside him. Time had cheated him of the chance to confront the woman who had scarred him for life. How could the woman who hurt him so deeply and the poor creature who rocked back and forth in a chair muttering to herself be the same person?
But it’s her. This is my mother.
The doctor sat in the chair next to Jack’s mother. “Patricia?” She looked up, smiled at the doctor, and gave him a quick, spasmodic wave. “Some people are here to see you. We talked about it this morning.”
She nodded, but Jack could see in her eyes that she had no idea what he was talking about.
The doctor pointed at Jack, and she turned to look at him for the first time. She gave him a scared smile and the same spastic, quick wave.
Nothing. No recognition. Wonderful. She doesn’t know her own son.
Replacement squeezed his hand. After a long minute, Jack said, “Hi.”
Patty’s face went white, and her eyes widened with a mix of terror and bewilderment. She raised a bony, trembling hand to her mouth. “Steven?” she gasped.
Who’s Steven? Is that my name?
His mother exhaled and let her hands fall into her lap. “You’re okay. I’m so glad. I was so worried about you. How are you?” She leaned forward in her chair and smiled.
There was a long pause. Jack tried to smile too, but he couldn’t. He swallowed and slowly nodded. “I’m fine.”
“You’re fine? Really?”
“Yes. Thank you.”
Her eyes narrowed, and she leaned so close to Jack he wanted to slide his chair back. Her breath wafted across his skin in little puffs as she searched his face. She shook her head from side to side. “No . . . no, you’re not.”
“Patricia, this is your son,” the doctor tried to explain.
“I had his son . . .”
His son? She thinks I’m my father. Do I look like him?
“I tried to take care of him, but . . .” She spoke to the doctor, but she didn’t take her eyes off Jack. “I couldn’t anymore. I . . .” She shook. “You’re not fine.” Her lips pulled back in a pained grimace. “You’re dead.”
The doctor placed a hand on her shoulder. “Patricia, it’s okay.”
“It’s not okay. He’s dead!” She thrust her hands out at Jack.
The doctor just shrugged when Jack looked to him for help.
“I didn’t know. I didn’t know they were going to . . .” She stood up, and her chair scraped loudly against the floor.
“Mom . . .” Jack cringed when he said the word.
She moved back to the wall. “I didn’t know they were going to be there. I didn’t know they’d hurt you. I didn’t . . .” She started to cry hysterically.
The doctor looked at Jack as if to say “I’m sorry,” and then waved to someone on the other side of the door, which was still open. Jack knew the orderlies would be there soon.
Jack stood up. “What happened?”
His mother covered her face. “Terry told me to get you to meet us. Sorry! I’m sorry . . . Please?” She moaned. “You . . . I came to the pond and you forgave me. You . . . love me. Why?”
“What happened? When?”
His mother sobbed and pushed herself into the wall. “It was . . . There was . . . Right after I found out about it. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know . . . You were so nice. Why would you . . . ? You couldn’t love me. No one could love me.” She let out an enormous sob. “You’re dead. They stabbed you . . .”
As the orderlies rushed into the room, the doctor held out his hand to Patty. “It’s okay.”
She screamed, “No!” over and over, as if Satan himself had walked into the room.
Jack took a step forward. “Who’s Terry? What’s his last name?”
Patty covered her ears with her hands. “Don’t go there! Stay away from them.” Her lips curled back in fear. “They’ll kill you.”
“I need to know. What happened?”
She wailed and pounded her fists against the wall.
The doctor motioned to the orderlies. Jack looked away as the big men restrained her and took her away.
The doctor ushered Jack and Replacement toward the door and back down the hallway to the stairs. “I’m sorry. I’m sure you can find your way out from here. I need to make sure she’s all right.” He turned and hurried back, leaving them alone.
Replacement took him by the hand.
“I need to go,” Jack muttered.
Replacement led him down the stairs, past all the patients, nurses, and orderlies. When they reached the front entrance, Jack pushed the big doors open and stumbled outside. He gasped for breath, like a drowning man whose head had just broken the surface of the water. He stopped and tried to breathe deeply.
Replacement rubbed his back. “It’ll be okay,” she whispered.
Jack’s words came out as a low growl. “How? How will it be okay? She’s totally off-the-rails crazy, and she thinks I’m my father. She just said he’s dead. Stabbed. How is that going to be okay?” Jack stood up and pressed his hands against the sides of his head. He took two steps forward, then turned and looked up at the third floor. “Did you hear her?”
Replacement nodded.
“That was just crazy talk, right? She’s just nuts. Do you think . . . ? I thought he wanted nothing to do with me.” Jack looked at her. “Do you think my father’s dead?”
3
Home
In the parking lot, Jack sat staring straight ahead, his hands frozen on the steering wheel. An old man in a tan work jacket got out of the car next to them. He was carrying a package of flowers and a cardboard box, and there was a look of resolve on his face. Jack had seen that look a hundred times. It didn’t matter whether it was a soldier going out on patrol or a policeman going on a raid, the look was the same.
It’s called doing what you’ve gotta do, no matter how much it sucks.
The man turned, and Jack watched him walk toward the brick building.
Replacement put her hand on his. “Do you want me to drive?”
“No. What I want is some answers.”
Replacement patted his arm.
Jack shoved the door open and headed back to the hospital. “Come on.”
Replacement hurried after him. “Jack, I don’t think they’ll let you talk to her again today.”
Jack didn’t turn around. “I need to talk to the doctor.”
They headed back to the third floor and found the doctor in the main hallway, speaking to an orderly. When Dr. Jamison saw Jack, he sighed and rubbed his eyes, then whispered something to the orderly before walking over.
“I’m sorry, Mr. Stratton, but—”
“I only have two questions.” Jack held his hand up. “First, what she said about my father—do you know if that actually happened? Or is she hallucinating?”
The doctor looked away, and his eyebrows knit together. “I can’t be certain, but if I had to guess, I’d say she was talking about an event that actually took place. Patricia doesn’t speak often, but when she has, she’s never had any manifestations or hallucinations.”
“Would it be possible for someone to monitor what she says from now on? Anything at all.”
The doctor nodded. “I can pass that along.”
“Just one more question. When will I be able to speak with her again?”
The doctor
’s face fell, and he looked at the floor. “That will need to be determined. As you witnessed, your visit was traumatic for her.”
She’s not the only one.
“I understand. Do you know if I can talk to someone who has her case files? I need to find out her hometown.”
“I can help you there. The name of the town stuck in my head. Hope Falls.” The doctor adjusted his glasses as Jack stared at him. “When I first met Patricia, she didn’t speak for weeks. We were going through an identification game, looking through pictures, and she yelled out, ‘Alphie’ and started clapping. I asked her about it, but I didn’t get anywhere. I went back through the pictures again, but she didn’t respond. But then I asked her where Alphie was, and she said, ‘Home. Hope Falls.’ It sounded picturesque, so I looked it up. It’s just over the border. If I ever got a week off, I intended to go poke around up there.”
“Thank you, Doctor.” Jack shook the man’s hand, and he and Replacement headed back to the car.
Replacement jogged to catch up to him. “What are you planning to do?”
Jack looked up the road. “I’m going home.”
4
Be a Good One
The traffic on the highway as they headed north toward Hope Falls was so heavy Jack had to stay in the righthand lane. He drove with one hand on the steering wheel and the window halfway down. Even with the sting of cold air hitting him in the face, he had to force himself to pay attention to the car in front of him.
“I have a bad feeling about this,” Replacement said.
“About what?”
“Going to Hope Falls.”
Jack glanced over at her.
“Whatever it was that happened up there freaked Patty out. Don’t you think we might be stirring up a hornets’ nest?”
Jack focused on the road. “Part of me agrees with you. This guy Steven, he’s probably a scumbag. What kind of man gets a prostitute pregnant? But . . . I don’t feel like I have a choice here. I need to know. I spent my whole life thinking the guy wanted nothing to do with me . . .” He trailed off as he saw the fork for the interstate ahead. He debated for only a second before switching lanes. As they got onto the on-ramp to head to Hope Falls, he looked again at Replacement. “I need to know.”
She crossed her arms and sat back. “In that case, count me in.”
After fifty more miles, the interstate narrowed, and it soon resembled a sparsely populated main street more than a highway. Just as they neared a gas station, the low fuel light on the dashboard clicked on. Jack tapped the brakes and took a sharp turn into the lot, catching Replacement with his right arm as she slid forward.
“Doofus,” she snapped.
Jack laughed. “I told you to wear your seat belt.”
“So that means you can drive like a wacko?”
He ignored her. “I need to get something. Can you pump the gas?”
“Already? We just got some.”
“It’s an old car; I need a refueling plane following us. Just pump the gas.”
“I’m a girl,” she protested. “My hands will get all gassy.”
“Gassy?” Jack stifled a laugh. “Fine,” he huffed. He got out and shut the door, catching a glimpse of Replacement’s triumphant smile as she put her feet up on the dash. Jack shook his head.
He filled the tank, then ran into the little station. A teenage boy was reading a thick book at the counter. Jack grabbed two sodas and some chips. As he headed back to the register, he noticed a map rack with a large sign above it that read Take a Road Trip, with a picture of a highway stretching out into the distance. He picked one up and brought it to the counter, added a tin of mints, and tossed down some bills.
“Will that be all, sir?” The clerk looked about eighteen, and his black hair was pulled back in cornrows. His name tag read Titus.
“What’re you studying, Titus?”
“Calculus.” He gave his open book a push. On the counter was a coffee can labeled College Fund.
“What’re you planning to major in?”
“Mathematics. I’m going to be a teacher.”
“That’s a coincidence—my father’s a math teacher.” Jack reached for his wallet. “A good friend of mine planned to be one, too.” Jack smiled as he remembered Chandler. After paying for the sodas and chips, he snuck two twenty-dollar bills into the can.
As he left the store, he looked back at the kid. “Do me a favor?”
“What?”
“Be a good one.”
Titus smiled and nodded.
Jack jogged to the car, hopped in, and handed Replacement the map and a soda.
“Thank you. What’s this?” She took a swig from her soda and held the map at arm’s length.
“A map. Do you know how to read it?”
“Of course. Why did you get it?”
Jack spoke mockingly. “So we can look at the map and find how to get to our destination.”
“Or I could use my smartphone with the built-in GPS?” She loved to ridicule him about his old-fashioned ways.
“Shut up.” He knew he was backward when it came to technology and needed to catch up. His phone had GPS, but he hated using it.
Happy to do her own thing, Replacement tucked her legs up underneath her and pressed the screen on her phone, while Jack pulled the rearview mirror down and studied his reflection.
“Do you think I look like him?”
Replacement studied him for a moment, unsure what to say. “Like your father, you mean?”
“Did you see Patty’s eyes when she saw me? Something in her clicked. She recognized me. Not me, but my biological father. I always tried to guess what he looked like, but I never guessed he would look like . . . me.”
“Well, if he did,” Replacement pressed her lips together in a tight smile, “he must have been a handsome guy.” Their eyes locked for a minute, then she looked away, embarrassed.
Jack gave her a crooked grin. “Thanks.”
Replacement typed something into her phone. “It’s a three-hour drive to Hope Falls.”
“We’ll have to find a hotel.”
“Really? We’re staying in a hotel?” She sat bolt upright.
“Sure. Why not?”
“Awesome. Can I look for one? I’ve got this neat app I’ve been wanting to try.”
“Knock yourself out.”
She pretended to punch herself on the jaw and then he heard some pings and beeps while she messed with her phone some more. “There’s a bed-and-breakfast—that’s like a hotel, right?” Jack nodded. “It’s right when we get off the highway.”
“Can you reserve a room with that thing too?”
“Hold on.” She tapped a few times. “Yep.” Her smile came crashing down. “But it’s a hundred thirty-five dollars a night. We can never afford that.”
“Yes, I can. Go for it.” He dug his wallet out of his pocket and held it out to her. “I mean it. Use the MasterCard.”
She looked at him quickly to make sure he was serious.
“Go on,” he said. She was already entering the numbers. Jack shook his head. The way she acted, you’d think he was taking her to Disney World. Not for the first time, he wondered why she had never gotten placed. She’d grown up in foster care, just like he had. Sure, she was on the older side for adoption, but she was still only nine or so when she first went into the system.
“It’s booked,” she said proudly, handing him back his wallet.
“Can I ask you something personal?” he asked.
She leaned in. “What?” Her face was so close to his that if he turned his head he’d be talking into her mouth.
He leaned his head away. “A little personal space, okay?”
“What? I brushed,” she said, with a one-shouldered shrug. Then she frowned. “Hey, I won’t have a toothbrush at the hotel.”
“They’ll have them there.” Jack turned to look at her with one eyebrow arched. “You’ve never . . .”
She turned red and scooted back. “I’ve
never what?”
“Stayed in a hotel.”
“No.” She smiled crookedly and played with her phone for a moment. “Was that what you were going to ask me?”
What am I going to say? ‘I want to know why no one adopted you. You looked like a normal kid, so why did you get passed over? Why didn’t anybody want you?’
He cleared his throat. “Um, I’m thinking we’ll need . . . some stuff. A change of clothes. Can that magic device find a Walmart?”
“Sweet! Yeah, hold on.”
They crossed over the state line, and almost immediately a siren clicked on behind them. Blue lights filled Jack’s rearview mirror.
“Great,” he muttered as he pulled over. “Don’t say it,” he grumbled. “I know you kept trying to tell me to slow down.”
Her head bounced up and down in agreement, but she refrained from saying anything. After several minutes of waiting, she looked back.
“Don’t turn around,” Jack said.
“What’s he doing?”
“He’s running my plate. You want to call in the car to make sure nothing’s flagged and see if everything is in line with the car and the driver.”
Replacement’s neck lengthened. “You mean you have no idea who you’re pulling over when you go up to a car? That’s so dangerous.”
Jack nodded. “I wish more people understood that. It could be just someone who’s late getting home to dinner, or someone who just killed five people.” He rolled down his window. “Here he comes. Let me do the talking.”
The trooper was about five foot six with wide shoulders and a determined stride. His hat was pulled low so Jack couldn’t see his face.
Jack opened his wallet and made sure that his badge was visible, along with his license.
The trooper stopped beside Jack’s window. He crossed his arms over his chest but kept his head down. His voice was gruff. “Are you blind or didn’t you see the speed limit sign?”
“I saw the sign, sir, but . . .”
“But nothing. You saw that sign—you didn’t see me. Did you, Stratton? Boom!” The trooper’s arms swung wide and a huge grin spread across his face.
Detective Jack Stratton Box Set Page 30