Kamikaze Boys

by Jay Bell

  David sounded impressed, and Connor loved him all the more for it. “The house is owned by two old ladies. Lesbians, of course. Tracy rents a couple of rooms on the top floor. I think her girlfriend lives with her as well.” Connor put the car in park and killed the engine. Already it clinked as it tried to cool. “Hey, don’t let on that we’re together, okay?”

  “What? Why?”

  “Because my sister always pulls the same shit when I bring a friend around. Trust me, you won’t have to play closet-case for long.”

  He could tell this suggestion made David uncomfortable, but it would be worth getting back at his sister. They grabbed their bags from the backseat and stepped out into an evening warm enough to be day, but with stars above rather than the blinding sun. Connor couldn’t wait to hit the beach and feel the sand beneath his feet. He imagined a quick “hello” to his sister before dragging David back out into the night.

  He stabbed at the doorbell a few times, no corresponding chime or buzz inside the house, so Connor knocked. Half a minute later the door swung open, warm light spilling out onto the dark patio.

  “What’s up, Con-man?”

  Connor’s older sister could have been his plucky younger brother and had been mistaken for such on more than one occasion. She was built like a sixteen-year-old boy. Well, one a little more athletic than David, at least. She kept her blond hair buzzed short, the longer hair on top gelled and spiked forward like a rooster in reverse. None of the women in Connor’s family had much in the chest department, and Tracy used this to her advantage. A loose gray tank top and a pair of baggy jeans helped confuse her gender.

  Tracy sprang out of the doorway, locking Connor in a hug that threatened to crack one of his ribs before she turned to look at David.

  “So he’s finally got a new friend!” she said. “After Sanchez moved out of the trailer park, I thought he’d be spending every Saturday night with Mom.”

  David, confused by her humor, smiled and clumsily introduced himself. Oh man, Tracy was going to love teasing him! Connor probably should have given David a crash course on his sister’s personality, but he’d learn soon enough.

  “Well, come in!” Tracy grabbed the duffle bag from Connor’s hand.

  They followed her in, barely able to take in the details of the house as she tromped upstairs. The banister and stairs were made from real wood, the surrounding walls painted a deep burgundy. The women who owned the house obviously gave all their attention to the interior—not that it wasn’t shabby as well, but here the wear and tear was caused by decades of living. Each wooden step was worn down in the front where countless people had walked, different tenants dragging furniture up and down as they came and went. The wood of the handrail was a darker shade, naturally oiled by the touch of many hands.

  The upper floor was simple. Directly ahead was a bathroom; to each side one of Tracy’s rooms. She brought them into the largest. Most of it was full of living room furniture, except for a corner sectioned off by a decorative dressing screen that failed to hide a bed.

  Tracy tossed Connor’s bag aside and hopped onto the couch, spreading her arms wide. “Are you hungry?”

  “No, we grabbed some fast food just outside town.”

  “That’s good because I didn’t cook anything.”

  She grinned at them both before patting the cushions on either side of her. Naturally she was sitting in the middle, which would be awkward for them. She thought she was being funny. Connor shoved her aside, Tracy doing her best to resist and wrestle him back, howling with laughter all the while. Connor grabbed her by the ankles and was about to pull her off the couch when she finally submitted.

  When he turned around, he found David staring at them both with a puzzled expression. All right, so maybe most guys didn’t wrestle with their older sister, but Tracy was the exception to rules that hadn’t been invented yet.

  “Can I use the restroom?” David asked quietly.

  “Depends on what you want to use it for,” Tracy responded.

  “It’s fine,” Connor said. “Just go.”

  “He’s cute,” Tracy said as soon as David had gone. “You didn’t bring him down here to try and get in his pants, did you?”

  And that was the best part. She didn’t have a clue about their relationship. “Straight as an arrow, I’m afraid. If this dry spell keeps up, I’ll probably go back to women.”

  Tracy slapped his arm. “Oh god! Well, I hope you have better taste now than in junior high. Remember Mary Jacobs? She was all metal and antennas.”

  “Hey, she didn’t have the head gear when we started dating,” Connor said.

  “Did her parents take her to a dentist from the seventies? I’ve never seen so much steel crammed into one mouth. Tell me you didn’t kiss her!”

  “If I had, would I still have lips?” Connor missed this—the strange banter of siblings that was so superficial, yet so comfortingly familiar. He didn’t have this with Tommy yet, since he was still so young, but someday Tommy would be bringing girlfriends around and Connor would be teasing him about his awkward years.

  “You know you guys are crashing on the couch, right?”

  “This one?” Connor asked.

  “No, not with Daniela staying here. You’re sleeping downstairs.”

  “I thought your girlfriend’s name was Sarah?”

  Tracy scoffed. “Her? Ancient history. I forgot she even existed.”

  “You moved down here to be with her.”

  “Did I? I thought I moved down here for the Cuban bonitas.” Tracy’s grin was shameless.

  “Seriously, you have a spare room, right? We can make a bed on the floor or something.”

  Tracy shook her head. “That room is crammed to the brim with junk. The grannies have been promising to clear it out since I moved in, but I don’t think they ever will.”

  Well, that put a damper on their lodgings. “Do you get cheaper rent at least?”

  “That’s just it. The room was supposed to be a ‘bonus’ to renting here. If they could make more money off me, they’d have it cleared out in record time.”

  When David returned, he wasn’t alone. Behind him was one of the Cuban beauties. Her long, dark hair fell in curled tangles around her creamy mocha skin. She was every bit as feminine as Tracy wasn’t, her nails and makeup done to perfection.

  David held the door open for her, like they were at a restaurant or something.

  “David, Connor, this is Daniela.” Tracy stood and walked over to her, making sure David was looking. She was so predictable. “Daniela is my girlfriend.”

  Tracy wrapped an arm around Daniela and pulled her close before engaging in a kiss that was anything but subtle. Connor couldn’t count the number of times she had pulled this stunt, either in front of the few friends he brought home or out in public. He supposed he had taken inspiration from her when the cop was giving him and David a hard time outside of school, but she still needed to be taught a lesson.

  David stared for a second, then moved around them to join Connor on the couch. As soon as Tracy came up for air, she turned a self-satisfied smirk on them. David looked uncomfortable, but only because he was naturally shy.

  “I wish you wouldn’t do that,” Connor said. “You’re going to scare away my buddy here.” He moved like he was going to give David a comforting pat on the back, but then he went further, bringing his face close to David’s. Their kiss was much more dignified. He gave David a gentle peck on the lips before nuzzling their noses together and kissing him again.

  His sister squealed, proving just how girly she could be. “Oh my god, I can’t believe it! My little brother has a boyfriend!”

  “That was good,” Daniela said with a smoky chuckle. “Now maybe she’ll stop shoving her tongue down my throat at the most embarrassing times.”

  Tracy ignored her, hopping up and down like she had just won the Showcase Showdown. “How did you meet? How long have you been together? You have to tell me everything!”

 
; “No, I don’t,” Connor said, taking David’s hand and standing. “I’m bringing my boyfriend to the beach before you terrify him any further.”

  “You can’t! You have to stay. I’ll even cook, I swear!”

  Connor rushed David out of the house like a celebrity being hounded by a mob of fans, represented here by one crazy lesbian. To her credit, Tracy only followed them to the front door before she gave up.

  “She’s not always that wired,” Connor said as soon as they were in the car. “Give her time and she’ll calm down. A little bit.”

  “She’s a little overwhelming,” David admitted. “It’s probably just weird for me because I don’t have a brother or sister.”

  Connor tried to imagine a female version of David, the curly hair grown out past his shoulders and bright red lipstick smeared across his lips. She would probably be just as bookish and shy as her brother. Rather than wrestling, they would probably sit side by side playing video games all night. No doubt Gordon would have a hopeless crush on her.

  Connor shook this image from his mind and put the car in gear. They had an ocean to see!

  The beach, it turned out, was walled away from the world by hotels, resorts, and high-priced condos. These institutions had long ago staked their claim on the coast, offering their patrons exclusive access to the beach. Connor drove up and down searching for a way in. He had pictured them driving onto the sand just like in the movies, but in the end they had to settle for parking at a restaurant with a deck jutting out over the sand. They snuck around the side of the restaurant, hopping a low fence and slinking past windows that were venting steam and kitchen noise into the night.

  Tracy worked here, if Connor had the right place, so if they were caught he could at least mention her name. The pavement ended and the ground descended, steadily blending from earth to sand. By the time they passed the deck, they were already below its height. The restaurant was having an eighties night, judging by the cheesy music blaring both inside and from deck speakers, but even over the music and chatting diners, they could hear the roar of the waves.

  David slipped in the sand, but Connor caught him by the arm and took his hand. Then they ran together toward the water, laughing like two madmen broken free from the asylum.

  “Let’s take off our shoes,” David said, plopping down on the sand and ripping at his shoelaces.

  Connor watched him, happy to be the one showing David more of the world. Then he lifted his foot to get his own shoes off, hopping around on one leg until he toppled over, causing David to laugh again.

  As soon as they were barefoot they ran down the beach, leaving footprints in the sand that wound back and forth across each other before being washed away. They stomped into the water, waves soaking the bottoms of their shorts, but they didn’t care. Connor would have gladly stripped off the rest of his clothes and dragged David into the water if he hadn’t felt the pull of the undertow during his last visit. David was the first to scoop up water and toss it at Connor, and soon they were splashing each other, dodging and leaping to avoid being hit.

  When they tired, they began a leisurely stroll back toward the restaurant.

  “Two weeks of this?” David asked as if he still couldn’t believe it.

  Connor nodded. “Yup. Just you and me. Well, and four lesbians. I told you we’re crashing on the couch, right?”

  David shrugged. “Sounds like paradise.”

  Eighties night was still going strong when they reached the beach outside the restaurant. Turning their backs to the building, they held hands and faced the great empty expanse ahead. Moonlight glittered off the nearest waves, beyond this a comforting darkness, as if they could step into the empty space and make of it anything they desired. Connor couldn’t imagine anything he wanted more than this moment, being together with David and away from the bosses and bullies of the world.

  Behind them, the synth-fueled pop gave way to a slower song that began with a simple guitar riff before bass and drums joined in. Crowded House serenaded them, telling them they shouldn’t dream it was over, even if the world came between them. Connor had heard the song countless times, but now it spoke to him directly, like a message from the universe.

  “I still owe you that birthday dance,” he said, turning to David and putting an arm around his waist. David wrapped his arms around him in return, pulling him closer. Then their bodies moved as one, swaying to the music. Connor bowed his head, let his lips brush against David’s neck before breathing in the smell of salt water on his skin.

  David was right. This was paradise.

  Chapter Thirteen

  “Rise and shine, lovelies! I made you some yummy breakfast!”

  David groaned and pulled a pillow over his head, but he knew it was hopeless. The last three mornings had begun like this, with one of the grannies waking them up for breakfast at the crack of dawn. He could feel someone watching him, so he shoved the pillow away and found a face close to his. This one was Glasses, as he had come to think of her.

  The two old ladies who owned the house were nearly identical. Both were short, pleasantly plump women with a bob of white-grey hair. David could only distinguish them by the reading glasses one always had perched at the end of her nose and by the overalls the other wore. As far as he knew, the grannies didn’t have grandkids and seemed to be making up for lost time with Connor and him.

  Granted, the breakfasts were phenomenal. He could smell it already, which was enough encouragement for him to mutter he was coming, sending the old woman away. As good as the food was, what David really wanted was to sleep late with Connor. A little privacy once they woke up would also be welcome.

  “Is she gone?” Connor grumbled from behind him. They could only rest on their sides, which meant being wrapped in Connor’s arms all night, so it wasn’t all bad.

  “Yeah, she’s gone.”

  They enjoyed a brief moment of quiet before rising and trudging into the kitchen. Both grannies were seated there, Overalls reading the morning paper while Glasses beamed and waited for them to be seated. Omelettes with a side of pancakes were on the menu today, a breakfast hearty enough that they could probably skip lunch.

  “Someone didn’t sleep well,” Glasses said when Connor’s first few bites didn’t chase away the crease in his brow. She always watched them eat like it was the most thrilling thing in the world.

  “It’s a little early is all,” David said, hoping the hint would be enough.

  “Well, our news program comes on at half eight,” Overalls grumped, “so we’d wake you then anyway.”

  “Shame about the extra room upstairs,” Connor said. “We’d be out of your way if it was cleared out.”

  Glasses nodded sympathetically. “There’s even a bed in there.”

  “Is not,” Overalls said, rustling the newspaper as if to banish the topic.

  David knew why: The room upstairs was stuffed with her belongings.

  “There is too a bed,” Glasses scolded. “The last time someone slept in there, it was half-covered with your boxes. I remember being so embarrassed!”

  “When was this?” David said.

  “Gosh.” Glasses put a hand to her cheek. “Let’s see. Nineteen— No. Was Reagan or Carter in office?”

  “She’s being dramatic,” Overalls said.

  “No, I’m not! We went to all the trouble of drywalling the basement to move your things there, and that was back in the nineties. I think we celebrated by going to a Color Me Badd concert. That should tell you something!”

  Overalls lowered the newspaper. “It was a Sarah McLachlan concert.”

  “Well, has she done anything since the nineties?”

  Overalls shrugged, and Glasses resumed eating, the topic fleeing their minds as it always did, but David wasn’t giving up.

  “You know, if you have a place in the basement where we could put the stuff, Connor and I could clear out the room. We’d be glad to do it.”

  “That would be wonderful!”

  �
��It’s fine how it is.”

  “But Margie, if they’re willing to do the work … You always say it’s your back.”

  “It is my back, and everything is fine where it is.”

  As the two old ladies argued back and forth, David kept his attention on his food. By the time he cleaned his plate, the battle was over and Glasses had won.

  After he and Connor showered, they went to the extra room and opened the door. It looked like someone had walled in a prisoner with cardboard boxes instead of bricks. Connor gave David a hopeless look, but David wasn’t dissuaded. With a little bit of work, they should … could … might have their own room tonight.

  Except the task wasn’t quite that easy. David was carrying the first box down the basement stairs when Overalls stopped him and asked to check the contents. She flipped back the cardboard flaps revealing dusty old newspapers inside. As she examined a few with careful fingers, David caught a date of 1983, meaning Glasses wasn’t kidding about how long it had been.

  “No, I think I need to keep these upstairs where it’s dry,” the old woman said.

  “Do they have articles that you wrote or something?”

  “No.” Overalls turned to check Connor’s box next, which was full of old T-shirts with even older political slogans on them. She held up one with the words “Out of the Closets and into the Streets" that was about five sizes too small for her.

  “I can still wear this,” she said. “Maybe we should keep it upstairs.”

  Connor glared at her from behind, his eyes starting to get that crazy look, so David promised to take the boxes back upstairs. Instead he went straight to the living room where Glasses was working on a crossword puzzle. One desperate look from him, and she understood.

  After a heated conversation, the grannies left to go shopping and have lunch. Once they were safely out of the way, David sprang into action. He hauled boxes down to the basement so fast that he never stopped sweating. Even when Connor took a break, David kept going.

  In a way, David felt like he was building them a home. The last few days had been full of beach trips or short drives to check out how different everything was compared to Kansas. David had spent nearly two hours in a grocery store, marveling at the Cuban foods that he had never seen before. Everything was new and exciting, and the idea of having their own space would make it easier to pretend that this was their life.