by Scott, S. L.
“Why is that so hot?”
“Because you’re insatiable. Want to make a pit stop?”
“I’m not having sex in a gas station bathroom.”
Chuckling, he rubs my leg. “Don’t worry, I was thinking of stopping by the lake to reminisce.”
Just before we reach town, he travels down a road that’s off the beaten path. With the windows down, the wind whips through the cab, and I hold my arm out, feeling the freedom in the falling that I tasted so many years ago.
He puts his arm out and looks over at me, a smile that makes my heart melt and a gaze that speaks its own language to mine—telling me he loves me. He’ll always protect me. He only breathes because of me. Reaching over, I take his offered hand, the connection always so strong that it takes me time to acclimate to the headiness of it.
Even now.
Seven years after the first time we held hands.
I lean forward to take in the grandeur. The trees clear, and I feel peace wash through me as I take in the rippling water ahead and the branches and leaves scattered on the ground. The rocks where I stood too scared to take a leap of faith until he taught me how to trust, how to love with my soul, how to be who I am. As if reserved just for us, there’s never another soul around.
He parks the truck that holds our entire lives of stuff worth keeping in the back. We left the rest in the past. Leaning against the wheel, he stares ahead. “Mangata.”
“Let’s go. Let’s drive straight to the moon just to say we did it.”
Popping the door open, he gets out, looking across the SUV at me. “I remember a time that I used to be the more spontaneous one.”
“Times change, and so do we.” He comes to open my door, but I beat him to it. “Wonder if that Dwight guy still works on the property?”
“No. He was fired a few years back.”
Resting against the truck, I ask, “For what?”
“Being an asshole.”
I struggle to decide where to look. Both the moon and Joshua have such big and competing presences. I force my gaze to the lake. “No wonder we had the ceremony without interruption.”
He peers down at me from the corners of his eyes. “Bryant now patrols. I told him we’d be here, so he’d leave us alone.”
I hip bump him. “This pit stop was planned all along? So much for spontaneity.”
“I can be a planner just like you.” He bumps me right back.
Kicking off my flip-flops, I start taking my shorts down. “Sometimes, planning takes all the fun out of the adventure.”
Not to be outdone, his clothes come off as fast as mine do. But as we stand there, neither of us rush into the water without the other because the water’s cold, even for a summer night. Joshua looks at me, taking hold of my hand, and asks, “What’s next?”
“We just jump right in.” He still waits by my side. But I don’t have those same fears I did years ago, so I take the first step and then another with him coming with me. “There’s nothing to be afraid of,” I say. “It’s not like there are sharks in this lake.”
“Nope.” He chuckles as we get deeper. “No sharks.” When we get waist deep, we lift our legs and swim.
Treading water doesn’t bother me as much anymore. It didn’t take long to find a job I’d like in New Haven, the man of my dreams next to me, and an endless lake of hope ahead. Wrapping my arms around him, I whisper, “You know, we never did make love in a lake.”
His feet plant, and he holds me to him, kissing me until we both fall under, not the water, but each other once again, spellbound by one another. I’m held tight, so tight, his cheek scratches against the skin of my neck. I love the feel of him burying himself in me in ways that others will never understand.
Moving my hair behind my shoulder, he whispers, “Not a day that goes by, not a minute or even a second when you aren’t at the forefront of my mind. Everything. Everything I say and breathe is because you give me the strength to do so. I will always be your strength, your shoulder, your ever after no matter what a new day brings.”
Although the sound of my heart beating is lost under the lapping of the water around us, I feel it as big as the moon and as strong as a bass drum.
I thought I lost the ability to cry, but no. I’d lost him, the soul that gave me the depth of emotion. So as I start to cry, I hug him as we swim as one.
“It’s funny to remember standing in your way when you entered my apartment seven years ago, barging right into my life, into my heart, and becoming the only plan worth sticking to. I realize now that I was only standing in my own damn way.” Slicking his hair back, I kiss his forehead. “I’m no longer afraid to jump all the way in if I’m jumping into your arms.”
“Prove it,” he says, smirking.
I roll my eyes because he’s so damn cocky. And handsome, and smart, and loving, and he puts up with me when my emotions spin into little hurricanes now and again. He’s my salvation. He’s my safe place. “I already did when I married you.” I’m kissed, and then I kiss him because I’m his haven as well. I’m the one he tells everything to, who allows him to be who he is, and who loves him to his core. I say, “I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
We start to make love in the lake, but no, it’s too murky and then a fish touches my leg, so I’m out of there. He gets a blanket from the back and spreads it out, the leaves like downy underneath. Music drifts from the speakers of the SUV as we sit down facing the lake. He says, “I was thinking we might want to live by the lake. Right here. Build a house in this very spot. What do you think?”
My gaze skims the water and I smile because it’s fun to dream. “The moon lighting the back porch.”
My response makes him grin. “Fresh fish for dinner.”
“Skinny-dipping in summer.”
“Kids learning to swim right out there.” He points. “We can build a dock.”
To hear him bring up the topic of kids takes me by surprise. Maybe it shouldn’t since we’re now married, but it’s a big jump for anyone to get used to. “I like when we dream together.” Taking another look at the lake, I add, “I know you have the money—”
“It’s not my money; it’s our money.”
“But this land will cost a fortune.”
“What if I told you it came as a package deal?”
I stare at him, slowly blinking, trying to catch myself up to what he’s saying. “What’s the package deal?”
“Everything I have is yours, Chloe. Earnings from the restaurant, money from investments, the apartment . . . and forty acres of land, this land.”
Is he saying what I think he is? “Your dad owned this land?”
“Yes. I actually wanted to give it to you as a gift after the wedding, but I got caught up in you, in the ceremony and the celebration after. I forgot.”
“You always were a romantic.” I look out at this gorgeous view, at our land and the little piece of the lake that will always feel like ours alone. My heart starts beating hard in my chest from feeling this happy.
As I recall from the first time we were here, threats were exchanged between him and Dwight. Most details remain too vague. But if he owned it in the past few years . . . “You fired Dwight?”
“Call me petty,” he says with a shrug. I can call him many things—honorable, talented in everything he sets his mind to, and passionate. Petty isn’t one of them.
“And that’s why we weren’t arrested?” I narrow my eyes at him. “I thought we were trespassing and being rebels. I don’t know, wild and spontaneous. I proved I could be a bad girl by skinny-dipping. My name was put on the bad girl list. Remember?”
“It was, and you sure did enjoy the punishment—Ow!”
“You deserved that knuckle sandwich for letting me believe I’d broken the rules. I was actually worried.” I cross my arms over my chest and twist my lips to the side. “All this time, I thought I was a bad girl, but I’m still just a Goody Two-shoes.” His chuckling becomes increasingly annoying.
“Do you mind not laughing at me?”
Pulling me to him, he wraps his arms around me and kisses my head. “I’m not laughing at . . . yeah, I’m totally laughing at you. But you’re so damn cute when you’re mad.”
I pull a solid few seconds pretending to be upset before I give in and laugh with him. He finally says, “If it makes you feel better, we were breaking rules. It used to piss my dad off that I would come out here at all hours of the night. I don’t know why, but I found it to be a good escape. If I couldn’t have him, I could enjoy the hell out of his lake.”
Those secrets shared in moments like these always tighten the tether on our heartstrings. I can’t stay mad at him. I lean over and kiss him before coaxing him to lie down on the blanket. He takes my clothes off, and I remove his, and we lie together under another blanket. It doesn’t take long, it never does, for me to want to feel him and for him to want to be a part of me. He hovers over me as I butterfly open for him. Our eyes stay fixed, our hands bonded, as we kiss and moan, love and thrust on the first night of our new life.
I whisper, “Bigger than the sky,” because he is to me, like our love has always been.
When he replies, “Bigger than the universe,” I believe him. Always him.
I can blame it on the moonlight or that we’re newlyweds, but this is different, we’re different. Starting a new adventure together, we’re carving our own path along the way. Things may not have worked out how I planned, and we may not have New York, but we have New Haven and this little piece of heaven.
Under the stars in the summer air, my body is set free from the expectations of others as we chase the moon and find our release. Most of all, we find each other under gentle kisses peppering my skin until we both fall asleep to the lull of the water and under the stars. I never want to forget a moment.
When I wake up, the sun hasn’t broken the horizon. When I turn, Joshua is looking at me, and I find safety in his eyes and arms. He smiles, and it’s not arrogant or full of anything but sweetness. “Hi.”
I reach over and touch his cheek. “Hi.”
“We’re married.”
Smiling, I let this joy build, let him fill me to the brim with this happiness. “I’m your wife, and you’re my husband.”
He says, “We can build wherever you want because my home will always be found in you.”
Swooning so hard that my cheeks hurt from smiling, I sit up, staring at the stunning view ahead. “Building our home here will be the perfect place to make memories.”
His arm comes around me, and we sit in the quiet of the morning. “The perfect place to have a long life together.”
“To raise a family.” The warmth of his hand rubbing my back is transferred, and I rest my head on his shoulder.
He kisses my head, and I relish this moment—everything about it—from him to the view, the memories and the future.
Before long, we pack up and get back in the Blazer. After spending a few minutes misting and preening the bonsais, I climb up front and buckle in. “Surely, having sex with you in the great outdoors earned me a bad girl title.”
He starts the engine and chuckles. Pulling away, he says, “Nah, that’s not the part that made you a bad girl last night.”
“Then what did?”
He cocks an eyebrow and then waggles both. “When you begged me to have sex even though we didn’t have a condom.”
“Oh, right.” Tapping my chin, I nod. “I forgot about that.”
Epilogue
Joshua
Two months later . . .
I rush in the door, expecting to see her, but I don’t. “Chloe?” This apartment is tiny, so finding her shouldn’t be difficult. “Chloe?” I drop the bag on the coffee table and head for the bedroom.
“In here.”
Following the sound of her voice, I narrow it down to the bathroom. Passing the empty spot that used to hold her treadmill years ago, I don’t miss it one damn bit. We run outside in the fresh air or burn off the calories in bed. Our love will always move us forward, never stuck in one place. That’s who we are for each other, pushing each other to be better, learning to love bigger.
Moving into her old apartment building while we build our dream home by the lake made sense. I’m close to the diner, and she’s near the hospital. It feels good to be in the space where it all started. Where we began.
Opening the bathroom door, I find her sitting on the edge of the tub crying. Seeing my wife in pain guts me. I go to her, kneeling, and bringing her into an embrace. “What’s wrong?”
With tear-streaked cheeks, she looks at me. “Joshua, tell me you love me.”
“I love you.” I run my fingers over the apples of her cheeks before lifting to kiss each one. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. It’s just all so right. We are. Our life. Everything.”
As much as I try, I don’t think I’ll ever fully understand women. “I don’t understand why you’re crying then.”
Her arm flies up, and she points at Frankie and Dwayne Evans. “Because that happened.” I can riddle my way through this. Scratching over my chin, I turn back to her, but before I can ask again, she says, “You should see for yourself.”
Standing, I move to the bathroom cabinet and see the usual stuff, except for one. “This little pot?”
“That’s Frankie’s and Dwayne Evan’s baby pot. I’m going to try to propagate.” She sniffles, rubbing her hand over her stomach
I’m not sure this news warranted a get home stat text, but I keep my mouth shut when it comes to that. “That’s cool, but I’m still lost.” Crossing her arms over her chest, she tilts her head. “I’m clearly missing the obvious.”
She nods, a restrained grin fighting to be seen. “Look inside the pot, Evans.”
A rational man might react differently, but I never claimed to be. I blink and then blink again. “What is that?”
“What do you think, Daddy?”
Staring down at the white stick, I read the word over and over again. My gaze darts to her again. “You’re pregnant?”
She stands and comes to my side, wrapping herself around me. “I’m pregnant.”
The tears make a lot more sense now. I swipe at my own that are weighing heavy in the corners of my eyes. I hug her, kiss her head and then caress her face. “We’re having a baby.”
A giggle escapes her. “We are.”
“I didn’t think life could get better, but you showed me.”
“Pfft. Since I couldn’t do this alone, let’s just call it even.”
“Even.” I kiss her again, letting those annoying tears fall because not only did she make me the happiest man when she married me but she’s making me a dad. “Thank you.”
Her hands cover mine, and my wife rests her head against me. “Bigger than the sky.
“Bigger than the universe.”
She says, “I also propagated the bonsai. It’s a great day all around.”
Her stomach growls. “Did I hear the crinkle of a bag? Did you bring me food?”
I chuckle. “I did.”
“You’re the best.” A kiss is planted on my chin before she heads out of the bathroom. I give Dwayne Evans a little fist bump against his pot. “Way to go, man. You’re going to be a dad, too.”
When I enter the living room, she has her nose stuck in the bag. “Smells heavenly.
“I brought you the special.”
Catching my eyes, she winks. “I thought I got the special every night.”
When she opens the container, her smile has me feeling like the luckiest man in the world. “You brought me chicken and dumplings? Just like the first time.”
“It all comes back to chicken and dumplings.” Wrapping my arms around her from behind, I kiss her neck and rest my hands on her stomach.
She’s still working on finding balance. She doesn’t half-ass anything. But I found my inner peace when I found her.
We were once many things—young, naïve, in love, apart, together again, and the
six years we pretend don’t exist. It all comes back to us because we were once, but we are again, forever. Hope and salvation for each other and always meant to be.
We even have the tattoos to prove it.
* * *
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Copyright © 2017 by S.L. SCOTT
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No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
Ben Edwards
He remembered, almost like it was yesterday. It wasn’t, but he relived every second of that morning like it was, hoping to find the one clue he missed . . .
She opened the door, but stopped before leaving. Large tears clouded the beautiful hazel eyes he could describe from memory. Every color reflected a different emotion, and he loved that he could read her so clearly. This morning the colors were blurred like their emotions. “I’ve got to go or I’ll miss my flight.” Her tone was remorseful and hurt, and he hated it. “Are you really going to let me leave like this, Ben?” A little stupid and a lot hurt, he didn’t reply. “We’ll talk later. I love you.”