by Andrew Grey
“Johan… I….”
“No. It has to be someone, so why not you? We will live whatever time we have together as though it is our last. That way we regret nothing.” He drew Robin closer.
“Are you going to tell me what happened to you?” Robin asked.
“Does it matter?” Johan asked.
Robin thought about it, realizing it didn’t at all. He shook his head, and Johan sat still and quiet, holding him as they waited together in the wooded parking lot. Robin had seen castles and mountains, the grandest cathedrals, and the world’s most fabulous works of art, but nothing compared to the simple wooded view out of the front window of the bus… with Johan.
“I got meningitis when I was twelve. They didn’t think I would live. I remember being only partly aware of what was happening around me. People coming and going, shots, tests—I suppose you know the whole drill.”
Robin definitely did.
“I remember my mama crying at the side of my bed, and I tried to move my hand to pat her head. I wanted to tell her that it was all right, that I was going to be okay, but I couldn’t. Then I must have slept or something. When I woke up again, it was quiet and Mama was there with me. She smiled when she saw me, and I told her ‘trinken.’ I don’t think I have ever seen my mama smile so big before. After that, I got better, but it took time. They told me when I was older that I almost died.” Johan turned to look at him. “I never thought I would die, even when I was so sick. It was when I was older that it hit me, and I figured I’d been given a second chance.” He rested their heads together. “I do understand second chances and being given something back.”
Robin nodded and sat still. “I do love you.”
“Me too, Liebling. That’s the hard part. Now we only have to figure out what we’re going to do about it.”
Robin shrugged. “I have a tiny apartment in Frankfurt for the season. It isn’t very big and is sort of quirky, but it’s enough for the two of us.”
Johan nodded. “Do you have to live there? We could live in Baden-Baden near my family. They could get to know you better, and I have an apartment… well, rooms above the restaurant there. Most of the family cooking is done there, so I only have a tiny kitchen, but there’s a great view of the town from the upper floor, and it’s mine. We could take the train when we need to go on a tour. It’s much quieter and prettier than Frankfurt.”
Robin didn’t really mind where he lived. “I have to give them a month’s notice, but….” He shrugged. “They can probably rent it quickly.” Apartments were in high demand in most of Germany, so there was little chance of Robin being out too much.
“No doubt. You will like Würzburg, and my mother already likes you.”
“I’ll be gone quite a bit leading tours anyway, and after that, we can visit my family and figure things out from there.” Maybe he and Johan would make Würzburg their permanent home. That wasn’t the worst thing.
They sat quietly once again, Robin thinking of the things he had to pack as the group approached the bus. He had completely lost track of time. Johan returned to his seat, and Robin met the happy group as they got back on the bus.
“Did you have a great time?”
Chapter 8
THE TRIP up the Rhine should have been the most relaxing day of the tour. Once Robin got the group on the riverboat, they got to sit back and watch German history pass by. Castles, ruins, vineyards, and the Loreley all passed as they sat, ate, and drank a little, with something new to see around each and every bend. It should have been easy and restful, but Robin wished Johan was with him. It made the day a little less sunny, but they each had their jobs to do, and Robin told himself he needed to man up and quit whining to himself.
“How many times have you done this tour before?” Margaret asked as she and Lily sat next to him near the bow of the boat for the very best view.
“I think this is my sixth or seventh time, but it’s some of the most amazing scenery in Europe.” Robin pointed ahead as a small water castle came into view, built on an island in the river. “I always wanted that one right there. Boats going by all day, my own castle on an island.” He smiled as they glided by, an automated tour recording explaining what they were seeing in German and then English.
“That would be awesome.” Margaret turned to Lily. “This has been a great trip, but I think I’m getting to the point where I’m ready to go home.”
Lily sighed. “You don’t have to go back to the messy pieces of a divorce.”
“Maybe not,” Robin told her. “But, you aren’t the same person you were that first day either.”
“Yeah, you’ve seen castles and cathedrals, and went to a spa naked. You can kick the cheating bastard’s ass.” Margaret held up her glass, and Lily clinked it, smiling again.
“Sometimes I wonder if anyone is ever the same after seeing all this.” Robin sat back in his chair. He wanted to close his eyes and doze, but that wasn’t a good idea. “Think about it. Back home, the country is over two hundred years old, but some of these castles have been ruins for longer than that. Julius Caesar crossed this very river in an effort to conquer Germania. This land remembers the good and the bad. It’s happened here, and people survived and flourished over centuries.” He was feeling a little romantic and decided he’d probably said enough already.
“Does it change much from year to year?” Lily asked.
Robin shook his head. “Nope. This view is pretty much the same as when I first took this tour my first summer of college. It’s one of the things I like most about it.”
He scooted over as Grant, Oliver, and Javier joined them. Pretty soon most of the group had gathered together, watching the scenery slide past.
The day waned slowly and the sun eventually set behind the hills on the riverbank. Once they arrived at their final stop, they all got off, and Johan was there to meet them. As night fell, clouds rolled in, and once everyone was on the bus, huge drops pelted the windshield and sides.
“Was that a good time?”
“Awesome” seemed to be the word used most.
“We’re going to head to dinner and then the hotel in Mainz. Tomorrow we’ll look around the town before heading to Frankfurt, where we’ve arranged a special farewell evening. The drive isn’t too long, so sit back and relax. Johan is going to turn out the lights so he can see better, and we’ll arrive soon.” Robin sat down and patiently waited as Johan navigated through the town and pulled up to the restaurant.
It was raining more heavily, and everyone hurried off the bus and inside to the dining room.
“Please sit down and relax. We’re a little early, but they’re doing what they can to accommodate us.” Robin worked with the restaurant, and they began bringing out the food that was ready. Conversations started at the same time all over the room. Robin heard snippets about the cruise and all the things they’d done together.
“You did this,” Johan said. “Look at them. They didn’t know one another a week ago and now they’re all talking like old friends. They’ve had fun, and maybe some of them have grown a little. Mostly they’re a group now.”
“Yeah, and tomorrow is the last day and then they go home.”
“True. But some of them will stay in touch, and they’ll all have great memories. That’s what you gave them. A chance for something they’ll be able to talk about for the next twenty years.” Johan took his hand. “I know I’ll remember this trip for a very long time.” He grew quiet as their food arrived, and Robin and Johan ate schnitzel. It was a good thing he liked the stuff, because they tended to get it a lot.
“To schnitzel,” Javier said, raising his glass.
The others all chuckled and toasted. There was strudel for dessert. It wasn’t original, but it was good, filling, and Robin was glad for every single bite.
Unfortunately, the weather was such that going out was out of the question, but there were amusements in the lobby area, and everyone broke into groups, playing games, even doing a puzzle, and having a quie
t night in.
“Come join us!” Lily called, and Robin pulled out a chair at the table. “It’s Cards Against Humanity. I think it’s the British edition, and it’s hilarious. I have no idea who half these people are, and it’s still funny.”
Pretty soon everyone was gathered around the table having the time of their lives. Lightning flashed outside and thunder rumbled, but the laughter kept on well into the evening. It was a pretty amazing highlight of the day. Well, at least until Johan got him alone in their room. Apparently he was feeling better, and he carefully showed Robin just how special he was.
Thankfully the thunder drowned out most of the cries of passion.
THE LAST part of the tour went off swimmingly, and late the following afternoon, Johan pulled the bus up in front of the group’s final hotel in Frankfurt. It was modern, relatively new, and probably the most uninteresting one they’d stayed at.
“How will we get to the airport in the morning?” Grant and Billy asked before getting off the bus.
Robin stopped everyone and made a general announcement. “The hotel has a service they contract with. I believe it’s five euros a person, and all you need to do is talk with the desk clerk and they will arrange for the ride and contact you in the morning when they are ready to go. It’s very easy and a bargain. Subway tickets will cost you almost as much. And you all know about the farewell dinner. The hotel has a dining room on the top floor, and we will meet there at seven this evening. That’s nineteen hundred Uhr for all you who have gotten used to German time.” He smiled and was met with happiness in return. “Johan and I will see you then.”
Robin got off the bus, and the others followed. He made sure everyone got their luggage, Javier pitching in to help so Johan didn’t hurt his arm.
“Where are you staying tonight?” Johan asked once everyone was inside and only the two of them stood next to the bus.
“At my apartment. I never stay at the hotel here in Frankfurt, to save Albert the expense.” Robin smiled. “In a way I’m ready to be settled for a while. We pick up our next group in a few days and start this all over again.”
“We don’t start everything again….” Johan winked, and Robin smiled back. They already had a good start.
“No, we don’t.” Robin shifted closer, and Johan slipped his good arm around his waist. “But what are we going to do until dinner?”
“We could make out in the back of the bus?” Johan offered.
Robin snickered. As interesting as that sounded…. “Or we could wait and make love in my bed once we get back to the apartment.” He leaned against Johan, sighing softly. “We still have a few hours, and I need to make phone calls.”
“I need to get the bus back.” Johan smirked. “Duty calls.” He moved away and got back in the bus, then pulled out into traffic.
ROBIN ENDED up taking the subway to his apartment. He made his phone calls and opened the place up, letting it air out. He also turned on the refrigerator and made a quick run to the local grocery to get some food in the place. It was nice to be back.
Schnitzel the cat seemed pleased too, when he bounded in through the window, purring softly as Robin petted him.
“Yeah, I missed you too. But I bet Mrs. K is wondering where you are.”
Schnitzel didn’t seem to care, and after making himself comfortable in Robin’s chair, he proceeded to fall asleep in the sun.
Robin changed and brought the cat to his grateful owner before taking the train back to the hotel and heading up to the top floor.
Everyone had gathered and the party had already started. A buffet dinner had been set up, and plates were being filled, the entire room alive with conversation.
Javier pressed a Schorle into Robin’s hand. “This was a great trip. Just what Oliver and I needed.” He held Oliver’s hand and a wide grin split his face.
“You two have a safe trip home and be good to each other.”
Their attention shifted to the door, and Robin turned as Johan came in, a vision in black pants and shirt.
“You do the same,” Oliver said.
But Robin barely heard him. Johan strolled over and cupped Robin’s cheeks. He kissed him right there, to whoops from the rest of the group and even a cry of “get a room,” which set everyone laughing, considering they had been sharing one the entire trip.
Robin blinked when Johan pulled back and turned to the others, his cheeks heating.
“It’s true….” Lily quipped. “The good ones really are gay.”
“You better believe it, honey,” Billy quipped back as he and Kyle shared a kiss that threatened to light a fire.
Robin slipped an arm around Johan’s waist and leaned against him.
“To an amazing trip,” Grant said, raising his glass. The others followed, toasting and drinking, and then the conversation began once again.
After everyone had a chance to eat, Robin stood and clinked his glass to get everyone’s attention. “I want to thank you all for a memorable tour.” He glanced at Johan, whose dark eyes grew steamy for a second. “I don’t think I will ever forget it.” He extended his hand, and Johan took it, standing beside him. “You were an amazing group, and it was a fun tour. I’m so glad you all seemed to enjoy it. I’ve sent a sheet around the room. Anyone who wishes can add their name and email address. I will then send a group email to those who sign up. That way you’ll have addresses if you wish to contact each other.”
“Have you heard anything about Mason?”
Johan cleared his throat. “I checked with the police in Trier, and they confirmed that they are holding him on theft charges and working to get the items he stole back to their rightful owners.”
Robin cleared his throat to try to change the subject. It was a party after all. “Please have a wonderful evening, and thank you all for coming along with me. I wish you all a safe and easy journey home.” Robin raised his glass, and everyone did the same.
The conversation began again in earnest, and Johan turned to him, heat once again rising in his eyes. “How long do you have to stay?” He tugged Robin closer. “I don’t want you to get too tired. I think we should go back to your apartment and not come out for days. I hope.”
“Smooching on the job,” Albert said as he came in, and Robin rolled his eyes as he backed out of Johan’s embrace.
“Like you didn’t have anything to do with this.” He mock-glared at his boss before breaking into a smile.
Someone started glasses clinking, and the conversation died. Kyle cleared his throat. “Billy and I want to thank Johan and especially Robin for a great trip. Robin listens a lot and gives good advice.”
“Kyle…,” Billy said softly as Kyle took his hand, and Robin eased closer to Johan, putting his arm around his waist as excitement built.
“I know what and who I want in my life now. My eyes are open and I see you for all you are to me.” Kyle pulled a small box out of his pocket. “I got this in Trier. It’s a Roman coin.” He slipped the chain over Billy’s neck. “That coin is two thousand years old, and that’s how long I promise to love you. Will you be my love and my life… forever?”
Billy’s answer was lost as he launched himself at Kyle, and they embraced and kissed deeply.
Robin turned away and found Johan looking back at him. Love was definitely in the air. Oliver and Javier had moved closer together, Javier with his arm around Oliver’s waist. The other couples had done the same, all standing together, happy, watching the newest pair join their loving ranks.
“Hey,” Johan said softly, tilting Robin’s head upward. “I see what you want.”
Robin smiled. “I already have what I truly want.” He swallowed hard. “And I want to grow old with him.” Johan closed the distance between them.
Epilogue
The Following Spring
“LIEBLING,” JOHAN soothed as Robin fussed through the apartment. He fluffed the pillows on the sofa and went into the second small bedroom to make sure the bed was perfect. “It’s okay. Your mom and
dad are going to have a good time, and they’re going to be happy just to see you.”
“I know, but it’s been since last fall, and I’m looking forward to their visit. They haven’t been back to Germany in a long time, and I want things to be perfect.” Robin closed the bedroom door and checked through their small living room and kitchen.
“My parents are looking forward to meeting them, and I know your mom and my mom, they are going to spend hours together in the kitchen.” Apparently the two of them had already been swapping recipes. “So don’t worry. You spent all that time as tour guide, so you know where to take them without wearing them out. They’re here for two whole weeks, so….”
Robin sat down and took a deep breath, checking his watch for the eighth time in almost as many minutes. “It’s going to take us some time to get to the airport, and their flight lands in a few hours. I checked and it’s running on time.”
Johan took his hand. “Come on. If we get there early, we can stop for a Schorle.”
Schnitzel jumped up on the sofa and crawled into Robin’s lap, purring loudly as he made a nest for himself. “You ready to meet your grandma?”
Mrs. K had developed health issues a week before Robin was scheduled to move out, and she couldn’t take care of Schnitzel any longer. Robin had agreed to take him. Johan still wasn’t so sure, even though the cat adored him and followed Johan everywhere—or tried to. Sometimes Robin wondered if Johan rubbed fish on his clothes.
“We have to go, so you be good while we’re gone.” Robin lifted Schnitzel onto the cushions and stood to follow Johan out and down to the car. In the States, the Smart car would have been dwarfed by everything on the road, but here it was eminently practical, especially with the high cost of fuel.