The Shadows Between Us

by Tricia Levenseller

  Love.

  Could love. If he let himself. Which he won’t.

  Then he raises his voice for the whole room to hear. “Lady Alessandra Stathos, will you be my queen? My equal in all things? A protector and ruler of Naxos and the conquered realms? Will you marry me?”

  “Yes.”

  An ear-wrenching cheer goes up from the crowd, and I bask in it. In the attention. In the offer of marriage from the most powerful man in the world. In achieving my greatest goal.

  He’s mine.

  But then a stroke of fear rides in, as I remember someone wants to kill my king. And should we catch this assassin, Kallias will still be a target his entire life. He could be taken from me at any moment.

  Kallias is ignorant to my thoughts as he slides the ring onto my finger, a silver band bearing a black diamond cut into the shape of a rose.

  “A toast!” Lord Vasco says from somewhere nearby. I hate that he has to be a part of this moment.

  Glasses of wine are passed around to all the revelers in just a few short minutes. But those minutes seem to take forever, and dread sinks low in my chest. There are so many people in the room. An assassin could easily sneak in.

  He’s safe, I remind myself. We banned weapons from entering the room. All the guests were thoroughly searched, much to their own irritation. No one can get past the guards surrounding the dais.

  The council members stand below us. Serving maids spread throughout the room to fill glasses to the brim. Kallias thanks the woman who pours deep red liquid into his cup.

  “To the king and future queen!” Lord Ikaros Vasco says, and the crowd repeats the words heartily.

  That’s when I see her. Hidden through the crowd, carrying a load of dirty dishes from the refreshment table.

  It’s the little girl from the gentleman’s club.

  From the place where Kallias was touched. And now, I note with horror, the shadows that had been about his head are completely gone.

  He either hasn’t noticed or isn’t using them.

  “Kallias, don’t!” I shriek. I bat the cup that’s raised to his lips away.

  But it’s too late. He already drank.

  He immediately falls to the ground and starts convulsing. Liquid foams at his mouth, and he closes his eyes.

  Screams go up, and the council tries to rush onto the stage.

  “No!” I yell. “Everyone stay back.”

  The guards close ranks, barring anyone from joining the king and me on the dais. I try to think. I need to keep people from touching him. We don’t know who the murderer is yet and—

  Except we do.

  It was Vasco who proposed the toast and had everyone’s cups filled. We knew one of Kallias’s council members had to be in on it.

  I’m torn. I have to get the little girl out of here, but I don’t want to leave the king’s side.

  And then Leandros, Petros, and Rhouben are trying to get past the guards.

  “Let them through,” I order.

  The guards part just enough to let the three men by.

  “What do we do?” Leandros asks. “He needs a physician.”

  “Don’t let anyone touch him!” I shout. “No one. Stay here with him!”

  I leap from the stage and kick off my heeled boots before running for that little girl. When I’m upon her, I lift her into my arms and sprint for the exit.

  She drops her dirty dishes and grips me for dear life, fearing I will drop her. She makes little protestations, but I ignore her.

  Run, run, run.

  How far is far enough? What did Kallias say? Fifty yards?

  We duck through the kitchens, swerve around overworked kitchen staff, and bound through the back doors. My feet step over rough pebbles and other refuse on the streets, cutting into my skin, but I don’t let that stop me.

  I have to get her away from Kallias. I’m not counting my steps. I’m too frantic. I have no clue where I’m going, but I don’t stop until I’m exhausted, which admittedly, isn’t that far away.

  It’s not often that I have to exert myself.

  We collapse on the ground, and only then do I register that the girl is sobbing, her little hands grasping my neck.

  “I didn’t want to be there,” she’s saying. “They told me to. I didn’t know why, but I knew something was wrong. First they had me touch him and then—and then—”

  She bursts into more tears, her wracking heaves making it impossible to hear anything else she says.

  I don’t want to listen to her crying. I want to go see if Kallias is all right. But I can’t let her get away. She must know or be able to point out who is behind everything.

  “Who are they?” I ask. “Who told you to be here tonight? Who made you touch him?”

  She can’t get any words out. She’s still so shaken from the way I dragged her away from the party and from the sight of the dying man she must now know is partly her fault.

  I want to shake her, to get her to listen. But I know that won’t help. And I know it’s not really her fault. She’s been used by people older and far more powerful than she. I just want her to say Vasco is behind it and have the whole thing done with.

  “Alessandra?” It’s Leandros.

  “Over here.” I bother to actually look around to where “here” is. We’re in some sort of gap between the stables and a small runoff from the mountain.

  When Leandros comes into view, I ask, “How is he?”

  “He’s all right, but he’s asking for you.”

  I look down at the girl. “I can’t leave her.”

  “I’ll stay with her. She’ll be here when you get back.”

  I hand her over, and the little girl allows herself to be held by a new stranger, though somewhat reluctantly. “It’s all right,” I tell her. “He’s a good man.”

  At those words, she lets her face fall into his chest and resumes her sobbing.

  And then I take off again. This time, I actually feel the pinpricks of pain that go through my feet with every step. The scenery is a blur around me as I hurry back in through the kitchens and into the ballroom, a nice streak of brown coating the bottom of my once-yellow dress.

  Kallias is standing, his back to a wall, no shadows in sight, but I hope that is a good thing, not a bad one. His council is trying to order about the guards, escorting party guests away.

  “Are you all right?” I ask.

  Seeing me, Kallias grabs me and pulls me to him. “I’m fine. Look at you! Are you hurt? Where did you go?”

  In as few words as possible, I explain about the little girl and how I rushed her from the room. I tell him Leandros is with her now.

  “Thank goodness for Leandros and this lot.” He points to Petros and Rhouben, who stand on either side of him. “My councilors kept trying to approach me. Vasco has already been carried off to rot in the cells until I’m ready to talk to him. My father’s best friend…”

  I’d forgotten what this means for him. It’s not only about catching the person who is trying to kill him. It’s about obtaining justice for his dead parents.

  “There was more than one,” I say. “I couldn’t get much out of the serving girl, but she clearly said there was more than one person involved in this plot. I’ll go back and question her as soon as we’re done here.”

  “Someone else can do it,” Kallias says as his arms tighten around me.

  “It can’t be you. You must stay away from her. We need to figure out what to do with her. But later. For now, we need to know what she knows, and there are too few people to trust. Where are your shadows?” I tack on at the end.

  “Once I healed from the poison, I wanted to hit things. Vasco’s face, in particular.”

  I resist an eye roll. “You should go upstairs. Rest from this ordeal. I’ll join you as soon as I have more information.”

  Kallias sighs. Then he looks over at the men flanking him. “Go with her. Help her with anything she needs.”

  Somehow, my chest warms at the absence of him
telling them to protect me. He knows I can protect myself. He doesn’t even need to mention it.

  I sit upon the dais and hastily brush off my feet before shrugging on my boots once again. Now that haste isn’t required, I can afford to wear them. Then the three of us return to where I left Leandros and the girl, who appears to have finally calmed down.

  I kneel down to her height. “What’s your name?”

  “Drea,” she says after a sniffle. “Please, I didn’t know he was the king until today. I never saw him before.”

  “It’s okay, Drea,” Leandros says, stroking a hand through her hair, “tell them what you just told me.”

  “There were two of them,” she says. “That man, the one who announced the toast to the king and queen. And the lady.”

  “What lady?” I ask. There’s a woman involved?

  “The one who’s always wearing black. But tonight she’s in green.”

  CHAPTER

  27

  I feel my brows shoot up to my hairline. “Lady Zervas.”

  Of course. Poison is a woman’s weapon. She hated Kallias’s father for not choosing her. Of course she would have him and his wife murdered. And Kallias. She tried to warn me to stay away from him because he wouldn’t be long for this world. Her hatred must run so deep that she would want to kill the offspring of the romantic union that should have been hers.

  Leandros hangs his head. “My uncle. I’m so sorry, Alessandra. I had no idea.”

  “I know,” I say. “It’s all right. We’ve already apprehended him, but I need to alert the guards to Lady Zervas’s treachery as well.”

  “No need. I’ll do it. You—Will you just take care of him and tell him I’m sorry?”

  I place a hand on his shoulder. “You have nothing to be sorry for.”

  “I should have noticed something, surely. I could have—”

  “Stop it. There’s nothing to do but let it go. You helped Kallias today. And you two as well,” I add, turning around to where Petros and Rhouben are keeping a lookout. “I’ll make sure the king remembers it. It’s time he stopped pushing his friends away. Especially with his parents’ murderers finally caught.”

  * * *

  I PLACE THE GIRL in a room on the opposite side of the castle from Kallias and me, giving her over to one of the kitchen staff for safekeeping. I’ll of course have to make more permanent arrangements later, but for now, I’m utterly spent.

  Lady Zervas and Lord Vasco are in separate cells of the dungeon. I finally managed to shoo away the nobles and their questions and congratulations.

  Who was behind it?

  Was my drink poisoned as well? I think I better see a physician.

  Let’s see the ring, Lady Stathos!

  You two are a smart match. Of course, my Clarissa would have also been a good choice for the king.

  I shut the door to my rooms and lean against it for a moment, rubbing at my temples.

  Managing people can be tiresome, but there’s still nothing more satisfying than watching people do exactly what I say.

  “You look how I feel,” Kallias says from my bedroom. He sits on my bed, one foot crossed over the other.

  “I had to assuage the worries of the nobles.”

  “You’re already a fine queen.”

  I kick off my boots, wincing as my torn feet hit the floor. Walking on my heels, I make it over to a cushioned chair and collapse.

  “You’re hurt.”

  “Nothing that a long soak in hot water won’t fix.”

  “I’ll draw you a bath.” Kallias moves methodically to my washroom. I hear him fiddling with the faucets and soaps before the sound of heated water filling a basin can be heard.

  He pads over to me on bare feet, scooping me up in his arms and carrying me over to the tub.

  “It was Zervas,” I tell him when he doesn’t ask. “She was working with Vasco. The girl from the club confirmed his treachery and named her as well. We’ve got them both in the dungeons.”

  When Kallias moves us to the washroom, he’s careful to position me so my rump can sit on the edge of the tub, my back leaning against him, and my feet dangling in the water. I wince once the cuts on my feet make contact. The hem of my now-dirty gown soaks up the water, but I don’t care. It’s already ruined.

  It feels so nice to wiggle my toes in the warm water, and Kallias’s hands start kneading at the knots in my shoulders.

  I’m a little worried by his silence at my revelation, but I give him the time he needs to process everything. I don’t say anything. Just let him focus on me if that’s what he needs right now.

  “I’m relieved that it’s over,” he says at last. “I really am. But I’m also done with this.”

  I swallow, and I’m certain Kallias must feel the sudden tension in me. “Done with what?”

  I don’t know what I’ll do if he says me.

  His hands are in my hair now, letting the strands sift through his fingers. “The whole night, I watched you from afar, save at the end, when I couldn’t stand it any longer. And just now? I stayed hidden from a little girl for fear that someone would be able to touch me.” He gives one shake of his head. “It doesn’t matter what precautions I take. I could lock myself up in a concrete box so nothing could ever hurt me, but that’s no way to live.

  “Being king comes with risks. I’m willing to take those. In the end it’s worth it.” He looks at me now. “You are worth it, Alessandra. I’m done living separately from everyone else. My parents’ murderers will finally be brought to justice. But even if they weren’t, I would still make this choice.”

  “What choice?”

  His hand comes down to the side of my face, and he turns me, tilting my mouth upward.

  I draw in a startled breath, and Kallias uses that parting to place his lips around my lower lip. He licks lightly at my skin as he gently pulls upward.

  Forgetting my injured feet, I stand and shove him so hard, I nearly fall over in the almost-full tub.

  I take the time to shut off the water before stepping out on the other side, keeping the basin between us.

  But it’s already too late.

  “What did you do?” I yell.

  “I kissed you,” he answers simply.

  “You touched me.”

  He stands straight, unafraid of this fight, it would seem. “Weren’t you listening to me? I’m done with it all! I’m not my father. I’m not going to spend my life alone so I can reach a hundred. Three hundred. A millennium. I don’t care about a long life anymore. I can’t stand being alone for one second longer. I can’t stand being apart from you for one second longer.” His face falls as something occurs to him. “But if you don’t feel the same way, I’m sorry I accosted you.”

  Water pools around me on the floor from my dress, but I ignore it. “The same way,” I repeat. “How? How do you feel?”

  Kallias reaches into a pocket of his dress pants and pulls out a folded parchment. “I wrote it on paper.” He opens it, looks at the words, and shakes his head. “I can’t read it aloud. It’s for you to read. Later. Really, I just wanted to prove I could write a better one than Eliades. But I’ll leave it here and go.”

  He turns around and places the letter on a nightstand before heading toward his room.

  “Kallias Maheras, don’t you dare leave me right now.”

  He pauses and manages to find my eyes.

  “Tell me,” I say. “You don’t need to read a letter. Just tell me.”

  He closes his hands into fists at his sides. “I want you.”

  I wait for him to say more. When he doesn’t, I say, “Surely you can do better than that.”

  He narrows his eyes at the challenge. “I’m done watching you flirt with other men. I’m sick of it. I don’t want you kissing or touching anyone but me.”

  I keep a straight face as I rub one hand up my other arm. “That’s awfully selfish of you.”

  “You be quiet now. I’m not done talking. You wanted me to say it. So I’ll say
it all. Selfish or not.

  “When I first saw you, it infuriated me that you never looked at me. Not once during that inane ball. It wasn’t until I approached you that you deigned to meet my eyes. And then you insulted me. You mocked me every chance you got. You didn’t bow and roll over like every other human alive. You challenged me.

  “That’s when I first knew I was doomed.” He takes a step forward. “And then we spent all those meals together, separated by a damned table. And you told me about your dreams. About your fears. And I wanted nothing more than to grant your dreams and remove your fears.”

  He takes another step. “You asked to spend more time with me. It was the one thing I thought I could not give. Because if I spent more time with you, I would fall for you even harder. This girl who didn’t care that I was a king. But then you spent that evening with Leandros, and I realized the one thing worse than not having you was not having you and watching you be with someone else. So I tortured myself by spending more time with you.

  “And you let me talk about my mother. You helped me challenge the council. You put a stop to nearly every problem in my kingdom. You were not only perfect for me, you were perfect for Naxos. So then I knew that marrying you was what I had to do. For the good of the kingdom. Even if it meant I would be miserable every day having you near and not having you.

  “But the most exquisite torture of all was the night at the gentleman’s club, when I could feel your reactions to me touching you. I didn’t know if it was because it was me touching you or if it was just because you hadn’t been touched in a while, as you’d mentioned before.

  “I want a life with you, Alessandra, one without the shadows between us. And I don’t care about being vulnerable. That’s what my guards are for. I’ll get a poison taster. I will live as other kings do. I don’t need this centuries’ old gift that is really just a curse.

  “And even if you don’t want me in return, I am still going to remove the law about people touching me. I don’t want this anymore. I’m tired of living a shadowed life.”

  By now, Kallias’s knees dig into the other side of the tub, he’s so close. I can’t move. I’m both terrified and desperate to believe him. To let him be what he wants to be. To marry him for real.