She sighed. Why did he not simply say the words? “I ask you again. What do you think? Am I beautiful?”
All went quiet except the light whinnying of the horses and the rattle of one of the shutters that covered the windows. After what seemed like years, Daniel finally replied, “Lord Parsons is a fortunate man to be in your company. I hope he appreciates it.” He returned to his worktable, turning his back to her.
Juliet shook her head. What was so difficult about saying a woman was beautiful? Even the lowly cobbler, a man she had never met before today, said the words. Yet, this man before her, who she had known since they were children, refused to speak them.
There was a far greater question, however. Why did it matter so much to her? Why did she need confirmation from a stable boy when she already knew the truth herself?
Regardless, his unwillingness to say what she wished pained her, and so, she decided she would pay him in kind.
“I am leaving with him next week to go on a carriage ride. I will have to endure his speaking highly of me for some time.”
“That’s good.” The boy did not even bother to turn to face her! If her foot did not pain her so much, she would have stomped it.
Annabel joined them, and Juliet did her best to flounce on her crutches. “Have a new coat by next month, or Mother will have you thrown out into the streets,” she called over her shoulder as she fought back tears that filled her eyes. Then with a quick nod at Annabel, she headed to the stable doors, leaving the blasted stable boy to whatever work he had to complete.
***
Large snowflakes floated to the ground as Juliet gazed out the drawing room window. The landscape was a blanket of white, and tree branches hung low with the weight they carried. Five days had passed since she had said those horrible words to Daniel, and the guilt had plagued her since. Her reaction confused her, for she did not understand what could possibly compel her to want to hear him call her beautiful. His status was much too low to consider his opinion of any importance, and few men or women of the ton would take a moment’s notice of the man.
Yet, that was how she was different. She had a desire to look upon his handsome features, even if he was only a stable hand, and all she asked in return was for him to tell her that he thought her lovely. Although his eyes had sparkled the night he carried her into the house after her fall, he had not looked at her that way since, and that, too, bothered her.
Despite her concern for his lack of admiration, something else, something quite strange and unfamiliar, bothered her. What had driven her to be so cruel? By all accounts, she should apologize to the man. It would not be the first time she had made her apologies for unkind words; however, in the past she had only spoken such words to men of greater standing. Daniel was a simple servant and she a lady.
In fact, her words had been in direct frustration of being reminded that she was to accompany Lord Parsons, and therefore she had been heartless. It was not Daniel’s fault she had agreed to the outing, but he had broad shoulders that could carry the burden of her frustration.
She remembered watching the poor boy attempting to read. He was nineteen! How was it he was in the employ of one of the greatest families in England and he had never learned to read?
The door opened and she watched the reflection of her mother entering the room.
“There are many activities to keep a young lady busy. Surely gazing out the window for hours is not one of them.”
Juliet wanted to remind her mother that she had done the same on many occasions over the last few years, but she bit back the retort. “I have been thinking.”
“Of what?”
Juliet sighed. “A gentleman.”
“Would this gentleman be addressed as Lord Parsons?” her mother asked as she joined Juliet beside the window. She wore a wide smile, and Juliet did not have the heart to tell her the truth.
Juliet nodded, but her thoughts were on Daniel.
“And what, pray tell, would be in your thoughts concerning him?”
“When does a man tell a woman she is beautiful?” Juliet asked.
Her mother smiled and put her arm through Juliet’s. “A time comes when a man realizes how he feels concerning a woman, but it depends on the man. When he is ready, he will utter the words from his heart.”
“And what if he does not? Does it mean he does not care for her?”
Her mother sighed. “Men often find it difficult to speak of their feelings. Lord Parsons does not know you well enough to express such sentiments. Do you wish him to do so?”
Juliet nodded. “I do.”
Her mother chuckled. “You have never been one for patience,” she said. “Do not worry; in time, Lord Parsons will come to feel for you as I suspect you do for him.”
“My feelings…” She focused her thoughts on Daniel once again, exchanging his name for that of Lord Parsons in her mind. “I do wish more than anything to hear him speak those words. I just know it will bring me the greatest of happiness.”
“I imagine it will. For love is a beautiful thing.”
Juliet shook her head. “I believe you may have misunderstood. I do not have any notion of love toward Lord Parsons.” Or even Daniel, she amended silently. “I simply wish him to call me beautiful.”
“My sweet Juliet,” her mother said as she brushed a strand of hair from Juliet’s face, “the fire inside you rages. You hold such passion, and although you do not realize it yet, what you are wanting just happens to be the first step toward love.”
Juliet nearly fell over and had to adjust her crutches. She, Miss Juliet Lambert, perhaps the most beautiful woman the ton had ever laid eyes on, falling in love with a stable boy? The idea was ludicrous!
However, as her mind went over the many conversations she and Daniel had shared over the years—not her admonishments but the true conversations they had shared--she had to wonder if there was not a bit of truth to her mother’s words. Whatever she asked, Daniel did without hesitation. Yet, he was her servant and was meant to do as she requested. Was that not to be expected? Therefore, did he do so out of obligation or because he cared?
The more she considered it, the more confused she became.
“Juliet?”
“I am sorry,” she whispered, frightened of the prospect of having feelings for Daniel, a man who was not of her station.
“Do not worry,” her mother said as she patted Juliet’s hand. “There is plenty of time to spend with Lord Parsons. Once your foot is healed, I had hoped to visit your sisters in London. I imagine that, now that you have gained an interest in Lord Parsons, perhaps you will wish to remain here rather than accompany me?”
The parties, the dresses, all of London was eagerly waiting for Juliet to arrive. However, as she thought of those things, an image of Daniel came to mind. No, she needed to remain and work out her feelings.
“You are correct, as always,” she said. “I will remain here in order to continue seeing Lord Parsons.”
Her mother smiled. “You have no idea how happy it makes me to hear you say that. I thought perhaps…” Her words trailed off, and Juliet frowned.
“Thought what?”
“That you had an admiration for the stable boy,” her mother replied with a small laugh. “Now I realize it was simply company you sought, and I am pleased you found it with Lord Parsons.”
Juliet smiled. So, her suspicions of her mother had been correct. The woman had taken notice of her actions toward Daniel. At least the ruse of holding an interest had removed all suspicion.
“Mother,” she said with a laugh, “I am many things, but to believe I would lower myself to consider a servant in that way? They are far beneath us, and he is lucky I even take the time to speak to him at all. In fact, I often wonder about those without the blood we carry through our veins.”
Her mother turned and looked at her. “What blood?” she asked.
“Why, that of society, of course. That is what makes us far better than those equal to the animals.
” She clamped her mouth shut when she saw the anger in her mother’s features. She had not meant the words, only speaking them as a way to ease the woman’s suspicions and to keep her from examining the possibility of Juliet’s interest in Daniel. And now that she had said them, she felt a shame she had never experienced in all her life.
“We are fortunate to be in the position we are in life,” her mother admonished. “The servants may be in a lower station than us, but they are just as human as we are. Humans who suffer, who laugh and who cry, and who dream of better lives for themselves and their children. It would serve you well to remember that. I never again want to hear you speak of them with such harsh words.”
Juliet had never seen her mother so angry, especially over the servants, but she nodded, nonetheless. “Yes, Mother. I am sorry.” In truth, she was.
“It is not good enough to be sorry,” her mother scolded. “You must understand their position, as well. Do you believe they do not have their own dreams? Futures they wanted…or did not want? Dreams that their children have a better life than they had been forced to live?”
Juliet stared at her mother, her eyes wide. “I suppose I have never considered it.”
Her mother took a deep breath, as if to calm herself. “You are my daughter, and I love you. Consider taking this next hour before dinner to think on what we have discussed, for it will be one of the greatest lessons a woman of your station could ever learn.”
Without another word, her mother stormed from the room, and Juliet stood staring at the empty doorway before hobbling over to the couch. She studied the fire and wondered why she had said such hateful things. Granted, she oftentimes considered herself far above those of common stock, but never had she ever thought of the servants as animals.
As she thought about what her mother had told her, her shame grew, much like the guilt she had felt in her harsh words to Daniel before. In all reality, not once had she ever asked the man about his dreams, for she had spent all of their time together speaking only of herself.
Letting out a sigh, she promised herself that she would apologize for her comments about his coat, and then perhaps she would ask him about his dreams. She could not imagine what sort of dreams a stable boy could want—was not possessing a position at Scarlett Hall the pinnacle of dreams? However, if what her mother said was true, he must have a greater wish for his life.
And as she thought on that, she then thought on her own dreams and realized that, in truth, she had come to be uncertain what her dreams truly were.
Chapter Eight
The carriage ambled down the road Sunday morning just before noon, the now melted snow leaving behind ruts deeper than usual. Lord Parsons sat across from Juliet and Annabel, both of whom chose matching blue dresses with dark blue coats and gloves.
“If I may ask,” Juliet said when there was a lull in the man’s incessant chatter about business, “do you have any dreams?” An hour locked inside such a confined space with the man was making her nearly mad, thus the reason for her question. Anything to change the topic of conversation away from that of business.
The man stared at her as if she had offended him with some vile curse word. “Dreams? I am afraid I do not understand the question.”
“It is the dreams one has in life and what they wish to do with it,” Juliet explain, unable to fathom how the man could have not understood in the first place. “Some dream of travel while others…”
“Ah, yes,” he interrupted. “I have many aspirations in life. The first is to increase my business ventures.” The man leaned forward, his dark eyes meeting her own. “Were you aware of my land holdings in this area?”
Juliet stifled a sigh. “No, I was not.” She was thankful that Annabel was beside her, for the man peered at her as if he expected her to be one of his holdings very soon.
He snorted. “I am not surprised. Most women typically have no knowledge of such things. However, for some reason I think that you, Miss Juliet, are not like most women. In fact, I believe you are far wiser.”
Although men were drawn by her beauty much like Lord Parsons was now, Juliet marveled that yet another man noticed her wisdom, as well.
“The land I own,” the man continued, “is vast. However, I own lands in other parts of England, as well. Why, I have properties in Dover and Birmingham, for example.” He leaned back in his seat, looking the pompous fool he was. “Now, at the age of four and twenty, I am by far one of the wealthiest barons of the ton. I even exceed several earls with what I possess.”
Juliet forced a smile as the carriage turned down a lane. “You spoke of other aspirations, my lord?”
“Indeed,” he replied as if it had slipped his mind. “However, do you not find the use of titles in such an intimate setting to be a bore? How about you address me by my Christian name, Hugh, while we are not out in public. I believe it would make us both feel more comfortable.”
Juliet wanted to laugh. Well, this certainly was a change! Perhaps this man was not as pompous as she had previously believed. “Very well, Hugh, you may address me as simply Juliet, if you would like.”
“I would like that very much,” Hugh replied. “One day I shall marry a woman of such beauty that every man and woman will marvel at her. Her dresses will come from the finest shops in London, the jewels round her neck imported from faraway lands.”
As the man continued with his rant of what he could give the woman who accepted his proposal of marriage, Juliet realized that the idea of possessing all these things he mentioned no longer held the same attraction as it once had. This was what she had always wanted in a suitor, a man who recognized the finer things in life and was able to provide them for her. Now, however, nothing stirred inside her, and she did not understand why.
“To that is what I aspire,” the baron stated, bringing yet another rant to an end, “or rather, as you say, dream.” He tilted his head and smiled. “And now, Juliet, may I ask about what you dream?”
Juliet smoothed her skirts. “Well, I have always thought traveling would be interesting, perhaps even by ship to new lands. Beyond that, if I am honest, I am uncertain.”
The carriage made another turn and then circled around, and Juliet glanced out the window, pretending to be interested in the passing hills. It was not that she did not enjoy conversation with Lord Parsons, but she preferred to relegate these types of discussions to those times she spent talking with Daniel.
“What do you wish for in a husband?”
Juliet looked at the man, amazed by his bold question.
“Forgive me,” he said. “I am not proposing marriage.” He laughed. “I must learn that the forward tactics I use during business negotiations cannot be implemented in civil conversation.”
Juliet gave him a smile. “As I have no plans to marry anytime in the near future, I will answer that question. I want a husband who will allow me to pursue my own interests and not only expect me to be in charge of the house and home.”
“That is a reasonable request,” Hugh replied. Then he sighed. “I must admit, however, that most men are so full of themselves, they never think of what possible interests a woman could have.” He winked at her, which caused her to give a true smile.
Yes, she most certainly had misjudged the man. Thus far he had remained a gentleman, even though his eyes wandered at times, and she decided to engage with him more in order to appease her mother. At least it would not be a complete bore after all.
“I see,” she said with a coy smile. “So, you agree that men are beasts?”
“Juliet!” Annabel said in a whispered gasp accompanied by a pointed elbow, but Juliet ignored her.
“Not at all,” Hugh said as he raised his hand. “Juliet is quite right, Miss Annabel. My kind are prone to keep our attention on business. Why, we can talk about it for hours on end if we are allowed to do so. Much like I have done today.”
“We have had a pleasant conversation thus far,” Juliet replied. “I have thoroughly enjoyed it. I must admit
, I do tend to find discussion of business a bit boring on most occasions, but your talk of it was intriguing.” She sat back in the seat with a satisfied smile at being able to give the man a compliment that was only partially true, knowing full well he would accept it as full truth.
The man indeed returned her smile. “Intriguing enough to perhaps speak about it again?”
She should have known better! Giving a man a compliment was like feeding a stray cat; it would return every day after in order to be fed once again. However, she could not deny him calling over, for her mother would force her to go with her to London and away from Daniel.
At least this man would be pleasant company; he was far more pleasant than she had first assumed. “I would like that,” she replied. “Please send a card.”
Hugh’s smile broadened. “I most certainly will.”
The door opened, and as Annabel alighted first, Juliet’s heart skipped a beat when Hugh grabbed her by the wrist.
“I almost forgot,” he said with a sly grin.
“Almost forgot what?”
He produced a gold bracelet from the inside pocket of his coat. “A woman of such beauty deserves the finest jewelry.”
Juliet gasped as the man clasped the bracelet around her wrist. “This is very kind of you,” she said, “but I cannot accept such a gift.”
“I realize it may be a bit much, but I could not help but think of you when I was away.”
Juliet was uncertain what to say and therefore replied with a simple “Thank you” before handing her crutches to Annabel.
Hugh then helped her alight from the carriage, and once she had her crutches positioned correctly, he bowed and said, “I look forward to seeing you again.”
“As do I,” Juliet replied with a smile. She waited until the carriage pulled away before turning to her cousin and putting out her arm.
Annabel gasped. “That is lovely! Why would he give you such a gift?”
“Because he said I was beautiful,” Juliet whispered. “Many men have said it, and it has always brought me great joy.” Then she bit her lip as Daniel came to mind, the only man who had yet to speak the words and who she truly wished to hear say them.
Secrets of Scarlett Hall Box Set: A Clean & Sweet Regency Historical Romance Collection Page 52