by Jodi Picoult
--Isn't it true, Doctor, that most defendants who claim insanity do so because of a psychotic break from reality?||
--Yes.||
--But Asperger's isn't a psychotic disorder?|| Helen says.
--No. It would fall more in line with personality disorders, which are characterized by perceptual and interpersonal distortions.||
--In legal terms, doesn't the absence of psychotic episodes suggest that the person is personally--and criminally--responsible for his or her actions?||
The psychiatrist shifts. --Yes, but there might be a loophole for Asperger's. We can't scientifically prove that someone with Asperger's has a very different experience of subjective reality than someone who doesn't have Asperger's, and yet the extreme sensitivity to light and sound and taste and touch and texture indicate that this is the case. If that could be measured, there would be strong parallels between Asperger's and psychosis.||
There is a sharp jab in my side as Jacob elbows me. He passes me a blank piece of paper.
--If that were true,|| Helen says, --wouldn't this suggest that someone with Asperger's has a hard time being aware of reality and his role in it?||
--Exactly. Which is why it might very well contribute to legal insanity, Ms. Sharp.||
--But didn't you also say that Jacob's fixation on forensics led him to use Jess Ogilvy's death to create his own crime scene?||
--Yes.||
--And wouldn't such premeditation and careful calculation suggest he knew very well what he was doing at the moment?||
Dr. Newcomb shrugs. --It's a theory,|| she says.
--You also mentioned a lack of empathy.|| Helen approaches the witness stand. --You said it's one of the features of Asperger's syndrome?||
--That's right.||
--Would you consider that an emotional measure or a cognitive one?||
--Emotional.||
--Is lack of empathy part of the test for legal insanity, Doctor?||
--No.||
--Isn't it true that the determination for legal insanity is whether the defendant knew right from wrong at the time the act was committed?||
--Yes.||
--Is that an emotional measure or a cognitive one?||
--A cognitive one.||
--So lack of empathy simply means someone is cold, heartless, without remorse,||
Helen says. --But it doesn't necessarily mean he's unaware of the nature and consequence of his actions.||
--They often go hand in hand,|| Dr. Newcomb says.
--Do they?|| Helen asks. --A mafia hit man has no empathy when he offs his victims, but that doesn't make him legally insane, just psychopathic.||
Jacob elbows me again, but I am already getting to my feet. --Objection,|| I say. --Is there a question buried under Ms. Sharp's grandstanding?||
--If I may,|| Dr. Newcomb says, turning to the judge for his permission. --Ms. Sharp seems to be trying hard to draw a parallel between someone with Asperger's and a psychopath. However, people with Asperger's don't demonstrate the superficial charm that psychopaths do, nor do they try to manipulate others. They don't have enough interpersonal skills to do it well, frankly, and that usually makes them the prey for psychopaths, rather than the predators.||
--And yet,|| Helen qualifies, --Jacob has a history of aggression, doesn't he?||
--Not to my knowledge.||
--Did he or did he not have an argument with Jess two days before her death, one that was overheard by employees of Mama S's Pizzeria?||
--Well, yes, but that wasn't a physical assault--||
--Okay, what about the fact that he was given detention last year for trying to strangle a classmate?||
A flurry of blank notes land in front of me, and again, I sweep them aside. --Just hang on,|| I say through my teeth to Jacob, and then I signal to the judge. --Objection--||
--I'll rephrase. Did you know that Jacob was given detention for physically assaulting a girl in his grade?||
--Yes, I remember Dr. Murano mentioning that to me. Yet it seems the trigger was the same: an interpersonal relationship that didn't quite match Jacob's intentions. He felt humiliated, and he--||
--Snapped,|| the prosecutor interrupts. --Right?||
--Right.||
--And that's why Jess Ogilvy was killed.||
--In my opinion, yes.||
--Tell me this, Doctor,|| Helen says. --Had Jacob still snapped when he was alphabetizing the CD collection in her residence, after her death?||
--Yes.||
--How about when he moved Jess's body three hundred yards to a culvert behind the house?||
--Yes.||
--Had he still snapped when he sat her upright and carefully covered her with his quilt and set her hands in her lap?||
Dr. Newcomb jerks her chin the slightest bit.
--And had he still snapped days later when he went back to visit Jess's body and phoned 911 so that the police would find her?||
--Well,|| the psychiatrist says quietly. --I guess so.||
--Then tell me, Doctor,|| Helen Sharp asks. --When did Jacob snap out of it?||
Emma
--They're lying,|| Jacob says heatedly, as soon as we are alone. --They're all lying.||
I have been watching him grow more tightly wound with each passing minute of the forensic psychiatrist's cross-examination; even though Jacob passed multiple notes to Oliver, he didn't ask for a break until Helen Sharp finished going for the kill. I didn't know what would happen, to be honest--if he would refuse to let me join him for the recess, if he'd still be holding a grudge from last night's episode--but apparently, I am the lesser of the two evils at the defense table, which is why I'm granted admission to the sensory break room and Oliver is not.
--We talked about this, Jacob,|| I say. --Remember? How saying you're legally insane doesn't mean anything; it just gives the jury something to use to find you not guilty. It's a tool, like telling the school district you have Asperger's. That didn't change who you were
... it only made it easier for teachers to understand your learning style.||
--I don't care about the defense,|| Jacob argues. --I care about what those people are saying I did.||
--You know how the law works. The burden of proof is on the prosecution. If Oliver can find witnesses who'll weave another scenario about what could have happened, the jury might find reasonable doubt, and then they can't convict.|| I reach for Jacob's hand. --It's like giving someone a book, baby, and saying there might be more than one ending.||
--But I didn't want her to die, Mom. It wasn't my fault. I know it was an accident.||
Jacob's eyes are full of tears. --I miss her.||
My breath freezes in my throat. --Oh, Jacob,|| I whisper. --What did you do?||
--The right thing. So why can't we tell the jury that?||
I want to block out his words, because I am about to testify, and that means I cannot lie if the prosecutor asks what Jacob's told me about Jess's death. I want to run until all I can hear is the rush of my blood, instead of his confession. --Because,|| I say softly,
--sometimes the hardest thing to hear is the truth.||
Oliver
Here's what I know:
Before we took that last sensory break, Jacob was a jittery, wild mess.
Now that we're back in session, Emma's on the witness stand, and she's a jittery, wild mess.
After I lead her through the basics of her identity and her relationship to Jacob, I walk up to the witness box and pretend to fumble and drop my pen. As I bend down, I whisper to her: Just breathe.
What the hell could have happened in the fifteen minutes they were gone?
--What do you do for a living, Ms. Hunt?||
She doesn't answer, just stares into her lap.
--Ms. Hunt?||
Emma's head jerks up. --Can you repeat the question?||
Focus, sweetheart, I think. --Your job. What do you do?||
--I used to write an advice column,|| she says quietly. --I was asked to take
a leave of absence after Jacob's arrest.||
--How did you get into that business?||
--Desperation. I was a single parent with a newborn, and a three-year-old who'd suddenly developed autistic behaviors.|| As she speaks, her voice gets stronger and picks up steam. --There were therapists in and out of my house all day long who were trying to keep Jacob from completely slipping away from me. I had to find work, but I couldn't leave the house.||
--How did Jacob's diagnosis come about?||
--He was a perfectly healthy, happy baby,|| Emma says, and she looks at Jacob. For a moment she can't speak, and she shakes her head. --We gave him his shots, and within a week this very loving, interactive, verbal boy stopped being the child I knew. Suddenly he was lying on his side, spinning the wheels of his toy trucks instead of zooming them around the living room.||
--What did you do?||
--Everything,|| Emma says. --I put Jacob through applied behavior analysis, occupational therapy, physical therapy, speech therapy. I put him on a gluten-free, casein-free diet. I gave him a regimen of vitamins and supplements that had been successful for other parents of autistic kids.||
--Did it work?||
--To some extent. Jacob got to the point where he wasn't isolating himself. He could function in the world, with limitations. Eventually, his diagnosis changed from a generic autism spectrum disorder to pervasive developmental disorder to, finally, Asperger's.||
--Is there a silver lining to that diagnosis?||
--Yes,|| Emma says. --Jacob has an amazing, dry sense of humor. He's the smartest person I know. And if I want someone to keep me company when I'm running errands or unloading the dishwasher or just taking a walk, he's quick to volunteer. He'll do anything I ask him to. And he'll also not do something, if I ask. I'm probably the only mother who's never had to worry about her son doing drugs or drinking underage.||
--But there must be times that it's hard for you, as a parent.||
--All the things I listed that make Jacob a perfect kid--well, that's what makes him different from the average kid. All his life, Jacob's wanted to fit in with his peers, and all his life, I've watched him be teased or turned down. You can't imagine what it's like to force a smile when your son wins a medal at his Pee Wee T-ball team banquet for getting hit by the most pitches. You have to close your eyes when you drop him off at school and he gets out of the car, wearing a big pair of headphones to help block out the noise of the busy hallways, and then as he walks away, you see other kids teasing him behind his back.||
--If I were to come to your house on a Tuesday,|| I say, --what would I notice?||
--The food. If it's Tuesday, all the food has to be red. Raspberries and strawberries and tomato soup. Sushi-grade tuna. Shaved rare roast beef. Beets. If it's not red, Jacob will get very agitated, and sometimes he'll go to his room and stop speaking to us. There's a color for each day of the week, for food and for clothing. In his closet, his clothes hang in rainbow order, and the different colors aren't allowed to touch.||
She turns to the jury, as we've practiced. --Jacob craves routine. He gets up at six-twenty every morning--whether it's a school day or a weekend--and he knows exactly what time he has to leave for school and when he'll get back home. He never misses an episode of CrimeBusters, which is on the USA Network at four-thirty every day of the week. He writes notes in his journals while he's watching, even though in some cases he's seen the episode a dozen times. He always puts his toothbrush on the left side of the sink when he's done using it, and he sits behind the driver in the backseat of the car, even when he's the only other passenger.||
--What happens when Jacob's routine is disrupted?||
--It's very upsetting for him,|| Emma says.
--Can you explain?||
--When he was little, he'd scream or throw a tantrum. Now he's more likely to withdraw. The best way I can explain it is that you'll be looking right at Jacob, and he's not with you.||
--You have another son, don't you?||
--Yes. Theo is fifteen.||
--Does Theo have Asperger's?||
--No.||
--Are Theo's clothes arranged in rainbow order?||
She shakes her head. --Most of the time they're in a heap on his floor.||
--Does he eat only red food on Tuesdays?||
--He eats anything that's not nailed down,|| Emma says, and some of the women on the jury laugh.
--Are there times that Theo doesn't feel like talking to you?||
--Absolutely. He's a very ordinary teenager.||
--Is there a difference between Theo withdrawing and Jacob withdrawing?||
--Yes,|| Emma says. --When Theo doesn't communicate with me, it's because he doesn't want to. When Jacob doesn't communicate with me, it's because he can't. ||
--Did you take steps to help Jacob adapt better to social situations?||
--Yes,|| Emma says. She pauses, clears her throat. --I hired a private tutor to help him practice those skills--Jess Ogilvy.||
--Did Jacob like Jess?||
Emma's eyes fill with tears. --Yes.||
--How do you know?||
--He was comfortable with her, and there aren't many people he's comfortable with.
She got him to do-- She got him to do things that he wouldn't normally ...|| Emma breaks off and buries her face in her hands.
What the fuck?
--Ms. Hunt,|| I say, --thank you. Nothing fur--||
--Wait,|| she interrupts. --I just ... I'm not finished.||
This is news to me. I shake my head just the tiniest bit, but Emma is staring at Jacob. --I just ... I wanted to say ...|| She turns to the jury. --Jacob told me he didn't want her to die; that it wasn't his fault--||
My eyes widen. This is unscripted territory, dangerous ground. --Objection,|| I blurt out. --Hearsay!||
--You can't object to your own witness,|| Helen says, delighted.
But I don't have to give my own witness enough rope to hang herself, either, and the rest of us as well. --Then I'm finished,|| I say, sitting down beside Jacob, suddenly afraid that I'm not the only one.
Jacob
She told them.
My mother told them the truth.
I look at the jury, at each of their expectant faces, because now they must know I am not the monster that all these other witnesses have made me out to be. Oliver cut my mother off before she could say the rest, but surely they understand.
--Before we begin the cross-examination, counselors,|| the judge says, --I'd like to make up some of the ground we lost yesterday with an early dismissal. Do either of you object to finishing out this witness's testimony before we adjourn for the day?||
That's when I look at the clock and see that it is four o'clock.
We are supposed to leave now, so I can be home in time for CrimeBusters at 4:30.
--Oliver,|| I whisper. --Say no.||
--There is no way I'm leaving your mother's last words in the jury's minds all weekend long,|| Oliver hisses back at me. --I don't care how you deal with it, Jacob, but you're going to deal with it.||
--Mr. Bond,|| the judge says, --would you care to let us in on your conversation?||
--My client was just letting me know the delay in adjournment is agreeable to him.||
--I'm tickled pink,|| Judge Cuttings says, although he doesn't look tickled or pink.
--Ms. Sharp, your witness.||
The prosecutor stands up. --Ms. Hunt, where was your son on the afternoon of January twelfth?||
--He went to Jess's house for his lesson.||
--What was he like when he came home?||
She hesitates. --Agitated.||
--How did you know?||
--He ran up to his room and hid in the closet.||
--Did he exhibit any self-destructive behaviors?||
--Yes,|| Emma says. --He hit his head against the wall repeatedly.||
(It is interesting for me to hear this. When I have a meltdown, I don't remember the meltdown very well.)
&n
bsp; --But you were able to calm him down, weren't you?||
--Eventually.||
--What techniques did you use?|| the prosecutor asks.
--I turned off the lights and put on a song that he likes.||
--Was it Bob Marley's I Shot the Sheriff'?||
--Yes.||
(It's 4:07, and I'm sweating. A lot.)
--He uses a song called I Shot the Sheriff' as a calming technique?|| Helen Sharp asks.
--It has nothing to do with the actual song. It happened to be a melody he liked, and it would soothe him when he was having a tantrum when he was little. It just stuck.||
--It certainly ties in to his obsession with violent crime, doesn't it?||
(I'm not obsessed with violent crime. I'm obsessed with solving it.)
--Jacob's not violent,|| my mother says.
--No? He is on trial for murder,|| Helen Sharp replies, --and last year he assaulted a girl, didn't he?||
--He was provoked.||
--Ms. Hunt, I have here the report of the school resource officer who was called in after that incident.|| She gets it stamped as evidence (now it is 4:09) and gives it to my mother. --Can you read the highlighted passage?||
My mother lifts the paper. --A seventeen-year-old juvenile female stated that Jacob Hunt walked up to her, slammed her against the lockers, and pinned her by the throat until he was forcibly removed by a staff member.||
--Are you suggesting that's not violent behavior?|| Helen Sharp asks.
Even if we leave now, we will be eleven minutes late for CrimeBusters.
--Jacob felt cornered,|| my mother says.
--I'm not asking you how Jacob felt. The only person who knows how Jacob felt is Jacob. What I'm asking you is whether you would categorize slamming a young woman up against a locker and pinning her by her neck as violent behavior.||
--This victim, || my mother says, her voice hot, --is the same charming girl who said that if Jacob told his math teacher to go fuck himself she'd be his friend.||
One of the ladies on the jury shakes her head. I wonder if it's because of what Mimi did or because my mother said fuck.
Once during a ratings sweep episode of CrimeBusters that was aired live, like a Broadway show, an extra dropped a hammer on his foot and said the f-bomb and as a result the network was fined. The censors bleeped it, but for a while it was circulating on YouTube in its full blue glory.