by Megan Hart
Caite bit her lip again, this time to hide a smile. “I hadn't noticed any such thing, Mr. Peters."
"Then you're mighty unobservant, Miss O'Neal."
She could see the glint of good humor in his stunning green eyes. Heavens, those eyes made her thighs quiver like an overly taut bowstring. And there she was, back to thinking those carnal thoughts again. Still, it was nicer than she could have hoped, lying snug under the covers and talking with Jed. He has a soothing voice, she thought. Just a little rough, like his personality. Now, when he was teasing and smiling, she could almost forget he had made her cry.
"I notice many things about you, Jed,” she said almost shyly.
Jed broke their gaze. “Maybe you oughtn't."
Now he was turning sullen again. What had she done? Caite thought quickly. As long as they were on light topics, he was all right. She decided to change the subject.
"I think you'd make a fine father, despite what you say.” She thought for a minute. “A better one than my own father anyway. Although that's not saying very much."
"Well, I don't gamble, if that's what you mean.” His voice was no longer teasing, but at least he had ceased his formidable scowl.
Caite laughed ruefully. “No. And I don't suppose you fritter either."
A chortle escaped the man beside her. “I beg your pardon, Miss O'Neal. That's hardly proper talk."
Caite glanced at him to determine if he were going to accuse her of acting unladylike again. To her relief, she saw he was joking. She risked a playful tap on his shoulder.
"And it is most ungentlemanly of you to point out such an inadvertent indiscretion, sir!"
Jed chuckled again, mock cringing from the light blow she had given him. “Watch those fingers, Miss O'Neal. I'm beginning to think you have designs on me."
At his words, Caite blushed horribly. She wanted to reply, to deny any such thoughts, but the words would not come. She gulped, meeting Jed's gaze. He was no longer grinning, she saw. In his eyes, she saw a reflection of her own desire.
His face was so close to hers. She wanted to reach out and run the tips of her fingers over the scruff of beard that had sprung up during their trip. She thought it would be both soft and scratchy. Caite shivered slightly. She had to keep her mind from thoughts of touching him! He had made it very clear there was to be no intimate contact until they were husband and wife. The last thing she wanted to do was ruin a pleasant interlude by doing something to make Jed angry again.
"Well, good night,” she said abruptly. Maybe in sleep she would find refuge from the sensuous feelings assaulting her. She could tell by Jed's expression her sudden dismissal had taken him aback, but she pretended not to notice.
"'Night,” he echoed.
Caite turned forcefully onto her side, facing the wall, and began to breathe in slow, even breaths. Behind her, Jed shifted. His weight caused her to slide a little closer to the center of the bed, so that for another brief moment, they touched again. He pulled away. She sighed in relief. A moment later, she had to move in order to relieve pressure on her arm from the weight of her body. Their bodies again met. This time, she moved.
Caite began to pray for morning.
* * * *
Next to Caite, Jed was concentrating on ignoring the firm length of feminine thigh intermittently pressing so deliciously against his own. Even through the cloth of his trousers and her night shift, he felt the heat of her skin. He shifted to the left another fraction. There. Now his left buttock was hanging over the side of the bed, and a draft was firmly caressing it.
Well, better a blast of cold air than Caitleen's warm fingers, he thought, then cursed himself. The thought had done nothing to increase his comfort.
She's so much more than just a pretty face atop a lush body, Jed thought ruefully. She's bright, and funny, and warm, too. She'd even managed to get him talking about Patricia, a subject he'd sworn off long ago. He'd told Caite things he'd never even shared with Shorty, or his Pa. She just had that way about her, he could see. Not only did a man want to lose himself in the bounteous promise of her curves, he'd want to stay and talk to her afterward. Caite sure was something special.
The more he tried to fight against it, the more he remembered the fresh taste of her lips. The lilac scent of her hair was maddening. Every inch of him strained toward her.
"Jed,” said Caite suddenly. “This is ridiculous."
Jed looked at the woman beside him. “What?"
Propping herself up on one elbow, Caite made a gesture including both of them. “This. Look, you're nearly falling out of bed, and I'm crushed against a wall of dirty boards. This is not what I had in mind when I suggested we share the relative comfort of this bed."
"And what did you have in mind?” Jed asked. He was amused to see her blush. The color on her cheeks reminded him of the flush a woman got while making ... Tarnation! He frowned, hoping to discourage what he knew would come next from her mouth.
"Well, it seems to me if we both lay in the center of the bed, we'll have ample room—and remain warmer besides."
She had blurted the words breathlessly, almost as if she were afraid of saying them. Her seeming reluctance was at odds with her bold offer. Here she was, practically offering herself to him on a platter. No proper young maiden would have dreamed of such a thing. Which must mean she was no maiden.
Arousal was clouding his judgment. It seemed to him, if she wasn't a virgin, then taking what she offered wouldn't be such a bad thing. Even if she was meant for his Pa, a man couldn't rightly be expected to resist a woman like Caite, could he? Not when she was practically begging for him to make love to her.
"You mean, move to the center like this?” Jed rolled at once to the mattress's middle. Throwing his left arm around her waist, he drew Caite to the center also so that, in an instant, their bodies were touching full-length.
"Not quite like that,” Caite stammered. Her face, if it was possible, had flushed the color of new bricks.
"Then you must mean like this.” Jed wrapped his arms around Caite while simultaneously sliding his knee to nestle at the juncture of her thighs.
"Oh!” Caite's startled outburst was quickly stifled as Jed crushed his mouth to hers.
Propriety could go to the devil. He was going to make love to this wench. She was driving him mindless with her mixture of eager vixen and coy maiden. Never mind the sanctity of the marriage bed. That was something they could both deal with later.
Caite, it seemed, was as eager for his touch as he for hers. No longer playing at coyness, she opened her mouth to him as soon as he tugged her bottom lip with his teeth. Jed's tongue swept the inside of her sweet mouth, and she returned the gesture. First tentatively, then with increasing confidence, Caite met his kisses with her own. Jed was enthralled. She had the exterior of an untouched miss, yet she was a firebrand when provided with the simplest spark.
Her body was molten next to his. Jed was dimly aware of her nightshift riding up her thighs. He had to touch that creamy flesh. Sliding his hands from her back to the first rounded swell of her buttocks, Jed inched the thin linen of her gown up and up until he had freed Caite's body from the waist down.
The woman kissing him so hungrily suddenly gasped. “Jed!"
His hands were on the naked flesh of her silky rump, and his knee still nudged the sweet junction of her thighs. Jed stared into the emerald depths of Caitleen's eyes. She looked dazed. Slowly, wanting to see how his every move affected her expression, he slipped his hands over her soft flesh to caress her belly and upper thighs.
Caite trembled a little in his arms, but she did not pull away. Jed dipped to taste her mouth again, forgoing the exquisite pleasure of seeing the desire in her eyes for the equally decadent ecstasy of feeling her tongue probe his mouth.
"You taste so sweet,” he managed to breath into her mouth. Caite sighed. Her arms were around his back, but that was no longer good enough for him. He wanted her hands on him, exploring his body as he was going to explore he
rs. “I want you to touch me."
Caite whimpered slightly, but did not protest. Obligingly, she began to run her hands over the smooth flesh of his back. It was not enough.
Jed took her right hand and placed it on the part of him needing her attention most. At the touch of her fingers against the bulge in his pants, he groaned aloud. “Touch me."
For a moment, fear dawned in her eyes. Regret, perhaps? Well, the wench would have no chance to change her mind now, not if he had anything to do with it. She had heated him to boiling, and she wasn't going to take the kettle off until they both were singing hallelujah.
"Jed,” Caite began uncertainly.
In response, Jed quickly unbuttoned his pants. That little bit of room was all his throbbing organ needed. Instantly, it sprang into Caite's hand. At first, she seemed to shrink away, so Jed clasped his fingers over her own and held them in place.
"See what you've done to me?” he whispered hoarsely.
She nodded, wide-eyed. She allowed her hand to close over him of her own accord. The pressure caused his rod to jump in her grip. Jed closed his eyes and buried his face in the lilac-scented lengths of her hair.
His hands still cupped her buttocks. Now, he moved her closer to his body, so her roundly curved belly pressed against him. Between her hand still grasping him and the torturous delight of her body pressing against him, he thought he might very well lose control.
"Move your hand,” he ordered. Caite did as he ordered, sliding her hand up and down the length of him hesitantly. When he bucked against her, she seemed to take confidence, and began to stroke him more firmly.
Have mercy ... she was teasing him deliberately! Although he had not had time to sample all her sweet delights, Jed could hold back no longer. With a low growl, he rolled on top of her and managed to slide his trousers down to mid-thigh all in one smooth motion. He silenced her gasp of surprise with a searing, lip-bruising kiss that stifled any protests she may have been making. He pulled her fingers from between his thighs and pinned both her hands above her head.
Bracing himself on his arms, Jed pushed apart Caite's legs with one knee. For a brief moment he hovered atop her, letting the tip of him slide against the moisture welling from her folds. She was ready for him, just as he had thought. With a sharp movement, he thrust himself into her hot opening to the hilt.
The pleasure at being engulfed in her heat was so intense he almost did not notice the slight resistance as he entered her. What he could not ignore, however, was Caite's wrenching scream. Horrified, Jed pulled out of the woman beneath him and stared at her.
"You're a virgin!"
* * * *
"Of course I'm a virgin,” Caite managed to say through kiss-swollen lips.
"But I thought ... I mean..."
"Is it your practice to go about deflowering maidens so brutally?” Caite sobbed. She had known first-time lovemaking could be uncomfortable for a woman, perhaps even painful. She had not imagined the sheer bolt of agony that had ripped through her most intimate of parts when Jed filled her.
Now the initial shock was wearing off, however, and she was becoming angry. And embarrassed. And angry because she was embarrassed. She had screamed like a silly nilly!
"Caitleen, I never would've touched you if I'd known you were a virgin,” Jed said miserably. He still was half-covering her, although he supported himself on his arms.
"You truly thought I was a strumpet.” The knowledge hurt her more than his brutal entry had. “You believed I was a common whore, sent out west to gain a husband the only way I could."
"Oh, Caite.” He seemed flabbergasted.
Fat, hot tears filled her eyes and slid down her cheeks. This was not like she had imagined at all. His kisses had filled her with such longings, and touching him had made her lower belly jump. Her thighs still quivered, and she could feel a warm trickle that must be blood. Now everything was ruined. Jed would probably yell at her again, and she would not, could not bear it! She would scream again, she would...
"Caite, I'm sorry."
Caite looked at Jed, surprised. He seemed truly contrite. Perhaps he was not angry with her after all.
"I'm sorry for taking away from you the one special thing a woman has to offer her husband,” Jed said. “Your first time should never have been like this."
Caite glared at him. The one special thing, indeed! “I shall have you know I offer many special things to my husband, Jed Peters. Virginity is too highly prized by you men."
But he was right. She had expected her first time to be special. Now it was ruined. But did it have to be?
"We can start over, Jed."
"What?” If anything, he looked more horrified than he had when he realized she was untouched.
"I don't hurt anymore,” said Caite. “We can start from the beginning. We can pretend it didn't happen the way it did. I ... I want to, Jed. I want you."
There, she had said it. Surprisingly, the hot flush did not rise into her cheeks. She felt calm for having been so brazen.
With a groan, Jed gathered her into his arms again and pressed his face into the curve of her shoulder. “Oh, sweetheart,” he whispered into her flesh. “You don't know what you're doing to me, Caite."
"I want to know,” Caite whispered, pressing her lips to his temple. The pulse there beat erratically against her mouth. She brushed her fingers through the dark glory of his hair. “I want to know everything about you, Jed."
For a short time, he just breathed against her neck, wrapping her in his strong arms and holding her. Caite was not sure what he meant to do, or whether her offer had angered or inflamed him. She remained silent, too, running her fingers again and again through the thickness of his hair, down his muscular shoulders and to his smooth, strong back.
It felt so good to lie in his arms. His gentle embrace was as nice as his kisses had been. Caite thought that probably she was falling in love with Jed faster than she could have guessed. She could only hope this tenderness he was showing her meant he was feeling the same.
Abruptly, Jed pulled away from her and rolled from the bed. Caite did not want to risk words that might turn the lovely mood sour, so she merely watched as Jed lithely shucked the pants from around his ankles and strode toward the other end of the cabin. Outlined in the firelight ... He has the physique of a god, or Michaelangelo's David, she thought, watching the red and amber waves of color wash over his taut body. But what on earth was he doing?
Jed returned to her side with a soft, dampened cloth and a fresh sheet from one of the shelves. Wordlessly, he urged her to sit up and move to the edge of the bed. Then he knelt before her.
"Jed, what are you doing?” Caite felt supremely uncomfortable in this position.
"I reckon if we're gonna start over, we should really start fresh,” Jed said. He began to gently sponge away the light tracing of blood that had stained her thighs. Then, he pulled her to her feet so her shift fell once more down around her ankles, and he swiftly exchanged the soiled sheet for the clean one.
Tears filled Caite's eyes. Jed's caretaking of her was the kindest, most welcome attention she had ever received from anyone. It amazed her that he could be so considerate.
Softly, Jed pushed her down until she lay beside him again on the lumpy bed. Bringing her to his chest, Jed stared into her eyes for what seemed an eternity before he spoke. When he did, his pleasantly rough voice was even rougher with emotion.
"You do understand what we're doing is wrong, Caitleen."
Caite hesitated. The Catholic Church preached about the sanctity of the marriage bed just as much as the Baptist, she figured, but that did not mean she felt what they were doing was a sin. It was right for a woman to give herself to her husband in the eyes of God. She guessed that out here, alone, they were in the eyes of God as much as they would have been if a priest had placed his hands on them and blessed their union.
"Nothing that feels this right could be wrong,” she managed to say, her throat thick with emotion. “It f
eels right, Jed. Surely God will not judge us harshly."
His groaned softly. Closing his eyes, Jed seemed about to draw away from her, but Caite would not let him. We've made our bed, she thought ironically, and now we're going to lie in it. Winding her fingers into his hair, she tugged his head until she forced him to meet her mouth with his.
His kisses scorched her just as before, but the fire was even sweeter because this time, Caite felt in control. Using what she had learned from their earlier kisses, she pressed open his full, firm lips with her tongue and plundered the masculine succulence of his mouth. He tasted of wood smoke and sunlight, with just a tinge of wet earth still clinging to him.
Her forceful kisses seemed to break down any barrier he had been holding. Jed engulfed her with his passion, sweeping her up into it like a leaf in a windstorm. Jed's mouth left hers and began to trail fervently down her neck. Muffling a frustrated groan at the high neck of her linen gown, Jed grasped the front of the garment and tugged it open. Tiny shell buttons exploded in every direction, pattering all around them. Neither Caite nor Jed cared enough to look for any of them.
Now her body was bared to him completely. Caite eagerly wiggled out of the shreds of cloth that remained, until she lay naked in his arms. The feeling of their bodies pressing flesh to flesh was torturous and exquisite both. The crisp hairs curling on his chest rubbed maddeningly against her tender, aching nipples until she thought she might scream for his mouth to find them.
Jed must have read her mind. Lowering his mouth to first one peaked bud and then the other, he sampled her delicate flesh as if he were a bee courting a flower. Caite felt the wet heat engulf her, and a weak cry escaped her. Jed flicked his tongue across the rosy tip one last time, then pressed his mouth to the firm white globe beneath it.
Caite felt her hips shifting restlessly against the sheet, but she was powerless to stop herself. A core of white-hot sensation had begun to build between her thighs, and with each tug of Jed's mouth on her nipples, she felt an answering tug down there. It seemed she could feel every bit of energy inside her gathering in that one spot.