by Betty Neels
She was very tired and slept right through the day until Teresa came in with a cup of tea and pointed to the clock. Judith sat up and yawned, then jumped out of bed, and less than an hour later she went along to Lady Cresswell’s room, bathed, neatly dressed, her hair just so, and a good meal inside her, feeling ready to tackle any emergency that might arise during the night.
Lady Cresswell had had a good day, Lucia, the nurse, told her. Dr Sebastiao had been and would come again in an hour’s time. The patient was dozing again, taking the nourishment she was offered and was quite reconciled to the transfusion remaining up until the present bottle was finished. From the manner in which this was said, Judith guessed that Lady Cresswell had been a bit difficult about that. She wished Lucia a good night, urged her to go straight to the kitchen where Teresa was waiting with her supper tray, and set herself to putting the room in order for the night.
It was still a lovely day, with the early evening sun nicely tempered with a cool breeze. Judith drew back the shutters gently so that Lady Cresswell would see the garden when she woke up and lingered a minute at the windows. Of Charles there was no sign, but she hadn’t expected to see him; he would keep out of her way as much as possible, she was sure of that.
Dr Sebastiao came an hour later, looked over the record Judith had written of pulse, temperature, and blood pressure, and pronounced himself satisfied. Certainly the blood pressure was rising nicely and there was almost no fever. He beamed at Judith, and patted her on the shoulder.
‘We have been lucky this time, Judith.’ She glanced at the sleeping figure in bed. He went on, ‘I have been in consultation with her own doctor in London and he thinks that as soon as she is able, she should return to hospital in London for a thorough check-up, with care, she could live a year, perhaps two, who can say?’ He put his stethoscope back in his bag. ‘I shall not wake her—will you check carefully and let me know if there is anything not as it should be. I will go and speak with the Professor.’
He wished her a quiet goodnight and went downstairs. So Charles was in the house, keeping out of her way. Her heartache was so real that she could only stand still and let it wash over her.
‘Judith!’ Lady Cresswell’s thin voice switched a smile on to her face as she turned towards the bed.
‘Hullo,’ she said cheerfully. ‘Dr Sebastiao’s just gone; he’s very pleased with you.’
‘You looked so sad—is something the matter.’
‘Heavens, no—everything’s just fine. I’m to take the drip down as soon as it’s finished, you’ll be glad of that, won’t you? It may wake you up while I’m doing it, but I’ll be as quiet about it as I can’
‘Yes, dear. Where’s Charles—you’ve had no time to be together.’
Lady Cresswell sounded fretful and Judith said at once: ‘Oh, yes, we manage—besides, we’ve got all the time in the world, haven’t we? He’s downstairs with the doctor. Now I’m going to give you a drink and do one or two chores, and you’re going back to sleep.’
‘I’m glad you’re here at night, Judith. It’s not so bad during the day, but at night I get afraid…’
Judith perched carefully on the side of the bed and took a frail hand in hers. ‘Well, don’t—there’s no need, it all boils down to the simple fact that you’ve had a severe nosebleed and the quickest way to get over it was to keep you quiet in bed and give you a spot more blood. You’re going to be as right as rain in no time at all; you’ll have your check-up when we get back to England and you’ll be none the worse.’
It was almost midnight and Lady Cresswell had been sleeping peacefully for some time when the Professor came quietly into the room. He looked bone weary, and Judith had to suppress a strong desire to go to him and throw her arms round his neck and comfort him; instead she said nothing at all.
He looked at his mother and then at her, his eyebrows raised in query.
‘Yes, she’s sleeping soundly. I’m going to take the drip down in a very short time.’ Judith kept her voice pleasantly professional.
‘In that case, will you come on to the balcony for a moment?’
It was dark there and she was thankful that he couldn’t see her face; he most likely had something nasty to say to her.
‘I have to thank you for all you’re doing for Mother,’ he told her, his voice nicely schooled to politeness. ‘It’s awkward that I should have to return so soon, I must ask you to continue the pretence of our engagement for the time being.’
His face was in the shadow, but the cool indifference of his voice turned her cold. ‘Yes, of course.’
She could think of nothing else to say, and as he remained silent she went back into the bedroom and checked the drip, thankful that she would be kept busy for a few minutes, taking it down. It was annoying that he didn’t go away, but sat down in a chair a little way from the bed and picked up a book. Really; the man had no feelings at all! she thought crossly as she started to dismantle the drip. Lady Cresswell woke for a moment as she took out the cannula and whispered: ‘Where’s Charles?’
‘Sitting in the chair in the corner,’ said Judith promptly, and she went to sleep again, satisfied.
Judith tidied away the mess, checked her patient and went to sit down on the high-backed chair near the bed. She had letters to write and she might as well go on with them, but she had scarcely started when the Professor said from his corner: ‘You’ll find your supper on a tray in the kitchen—go and eat it, I’ll stay here until you return.’
She started to say: ‘But I can eat my supper here…’ when he interrupted her.
‘Do as you’re told, Judith.’ Just for a second there was a gleam of amusement in his eyes. ‘We don’t want to disturb Mother, do we?’
She got up without a word and he opened the door for her. As she passed him their hands brushed against each other; it was like an electric shock to her and she fled down the stairs as though running for her life.
In the kitchen she pulled herself together and sat down at the table to eat the meal Teresa had prepared. She was all kinds of a fool and thank heaven she wouldn’t have to see much of him. He would surely go to bed soon and she would be in her own bed long before anyone else was up in the morning. She made tea and drank the pot dry, and thus fortified went back upstairs.
The Professor was sitting in his chair, reading. He got up as soon as Judith went in and said goodnight, then went away; which left her the rest of the night to think about him and wonder if she had been too hasty. Perhaps he hadn’t meant quite all he said when Eileen had telephoned, perhaps she should have given him the chance to explain, but if she had been mistaken, why had he been so quick to break off everything between them? Her head ached with the muddle of her thoughts and she was glad when Lady Cresswell woke up soon after five o’clock and she could get busy with early morning chores. They were enjoying a cup of tea together when Lucia joined them. Judith waited only long enough to give her report and wish Lady Cresswell a good day, before leaving them together. She was beset by the fear that Charles would turn up before she could escape.
She was tired, and hot and hungry and she decided to shower, get into her nightie and dressing gown, have a quick breakfast and go straight to bed, but down in the kitchen the faithful Arthur got out of his basket, inviting her to go outside, so she drank some orange juice from the fridge, picked up a roll from the table and opened the back door.
The morning was enchanting, the light still pearly and the early sun shedding a gentle warmth. Judith sat down on the grass, well away from the house, and kicked off her slippers. Arthur flopped down beside her and in a few minutes they were joined by Mrs Smith and the kittens, anxious for company and on the look-out for breakfast. Judith shared her roll and sat chewing at the bit which remained, but presently she gave up and sat, the bread still in her hand and her knees under her chin, staring ahead of her, not seeing the garden round her, only a bleak future of years without Charles. Until that moment she had managed not to cry, but now her feelings got th
e better of her and tears poured down her cheeks in an absolute torrent.
She sniffed and sobbed for a few minutes, then caught her breath at Arthur’s welcoming whine and the busy swish of his tail. He didn’t do that for Augusto or Teresa; he was still a little wary of them and he ignored the doctor when he came to the house; he whined like that for herself, Lady Cresswell and Charles. So it had to be Charles. Judith turned round slowly, quite forgetful of her wet blotchy face, and saw him standing there within a few paces of her. He didn’t look as though he had slept a wink, although he was shaved and immaculate. Indeed, he looked every day of his years but nonetheless strikingly handsome in a haggard kind of way.
She could suddenly bear it no longer. She cried: ‘Oh, Charles you mustn’t worry so much, Lady Cresswell is going to be all right and once she’s over this she’ll probably be well for months, even years.’
He came towards her. ‘I know that, and I’m not worried.’ He sounded harsh and angry and she leaned away from him, clutching her roll. He bent down and took it from her and handed it to Arthur, then hauled her to her feet. ‘I’ve been awake all night,’ he told her testily, ‘making up speeches, and now I’m here I find that none of them is suitable. There are no words…’ he caught her close, crushing her ribs most painfully, and began to kiss her. It was, she decided, quite useless to stop him, and anyway, she didn’t want to.
‘I’m too old for you,’ he stated severely, ‘I have an infernal temper and I like my way…’
‘None of these matter,’ said Judith, ‘because I love you more than enough to put up with all of them, only you haven’t yet said you love me, you know.’ She gave him a severe look. ‘Nor did you choose to explain…’
‘Oh, my darling, of course I love you—I fell in love with you the moment I set eyes on you in my kitchen, but nothing went right, did it? You shied away from me like a startled fawn.’
Judith chuckled. ‘I’m a bit big for a fawn,’ she pointed out.
‘You’re exactly right, every inch of you.’ He kissed her again. ‘And it wasn’t you I was talking about but an indigent second cousin who’s only too eager to live with Mother and look after her.’
‘Oh!’ Judith glowed with happiness, ‘but she should be near us, so that we can see her as often as possible.’
‘Well, she will be. There’s a charming house in Hawkshead—your Uncle Tom is dealing with the buying of it for me, so you can see her every day if you want to.’ He added wickedly: ‘The twins will love visiting Granny.’
‘The twins… Oh, that was to make her happy.’
‘Well, it will make me happy too, my love.’
She had the horrid feeling that she was going to cry again, only this time it was because she was so happy. ‘I’ve been very silly,’ she said in a small voice.
‘Indeed you have.’ Though it didn’t sound as though he minded that. ‘But it was my fault—you see, I wasn’t sure that you loved me enough.’
‘More than enough, dearest Charles,’ Judith assured him, and lifted her face for his kiss. Presently she asked: ‘But why did Eileen telephone here?’
‘Good God, darling, must we keep on talking about the girl? Remember my cousin—you met him at my house—he and Eileen see a lot of each other. It was he who remembered the indigent cousin’s address and gave it to me, and he asked Eileen to phone me to see if everything had been settled.’
‘You could have explained…’
‘My dearest Miss Golightly, could we not forget the whole unfortunate matter?’
‘All right, I’ll never say another word, only if you annoy me I daresay I’ll mention it just once in a while, you know!’
‘As long as it’s not too often,’ observed Charles, and fell to kissing her once more.
ISBN: 978-1-4592-3940-1
JUDITH
Copyright © 1982 by Betty Neels.
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