by Elle James
Ava’s gaze captured his. “You told her you couldn’t, didn’t you?” When he hesitated, her eyes widened. “You didn’t.”
He nodded. “I told her I’d go.” Sean reached for her hand. “She looked at me with those blue eyes, and I couldn’t say no.”
Ava pressed her hands to her cheeks. “This can’t be good.”
“Do you want me to go in there and tell her I can’t make it?” He started for Mica’s bedroom. “I will. It’ll break her heart, but I understand what you’re trying to do.”
Ava grabbed his arm bringing him to a halt. “No. You’re right. It’ll break her heart.” She let go of him and drew in a deep breath. “I should have seen this coming. She’s been curious about her friends’ fathers. She sees them come to get their children at her school. I guess she’s feeling the loss.” Ava’s eyes filled with tears. She blinked them back and lifted her chin. “I’m sorry. You got a lot more than you bargained for when you agreed to go out with me.”
“I did,” he said and brushed away a tear that found its way down her cheek. “So far, I have no regrets.” He chucked her beneath the chin. “No reneging on cooking dinner for me. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a homecooked meal.”
Ava nodded. “You’re on.”
“And if it’s all right with you, I’ll be at Mica’s school on Monday, as promised, for Daddy Day. We can untangle it afterward.”
Ava cupped his cheek, leaned up and brushed her lips across his. “Thank you.”
Sean caught her around the waist and crushed her to him, claiming her lips in a kiss like their first…hot, deep and not nearly long enough.
He tore himself away and exited. “Lock the door behind me,” he said.
Ava nodded and closed the door.
Sean waited until he heard the click of the deadbolt engaging before he climbed into his truck and drove away.
He looked in his rearview mirror at the little cottage with two beautiful blondes tucked safely inside.
All he could think was how much he’d wanted to stay.
Chapter 5
“We should be at the office,” Ava said as she climbed out of Leslie’s car and hurried toward Mica’s school. “I didn’t mean for you to take off as well. I felt like I needed to be there for when Sean leaves and Mica realizes he’s not coming back.”
Leslie stopped her at the front door of the school. “How do you know he’s not coming back?”
“Because I told him I didn’t want to confuse Mica by introducing men into her life.”
“But didn’t that already happen?” Leslie cocked an eyebrow.
“Not intentionally. I should have been more careful. Next time, I’ll drive and leave my date at the restaurant.”
Leslie shook her head. “Honey, that’s not how dates work. Kissing in public isn’t the same as kissing in private.”
Ava’s cheeks heated. “Who said we kissed?”
Leslie laughed and pointed a finger toward Ava. “Ha! You did kiss. I knew it.”
Ava frowned at her friend and boss. “That’s playing dirty.”
“It worked, didn’t it.” Leslie tipped her head toward the school. “It’s five minutes after ten o’clock. If he showed up, he’ll be in there with Mica now. What if he’s good with her? Do you really want to keep her from seeing him again?”
Ava sighed. “Sean and I went into this dating thing with the same goals in mind. We don’t want a lasting relationship. We just wanted to go out a few times and that’s it.”
“But you liked him, didn’t you?”
Again, her cheeks heated. “He’s a nice guy.”
“And he kisses good, huh?” Leslie’s lips curled into a wicked smile. “And you’re telling me that after a couple of dates, you won’t want to see him again? And you won’t miss kissing him?”
She shrugged. “I don’t want to get involved. It wouldn’t be fair to Mica.”
Leslie’s smile sank. “What about being fair to Ava? You deserve to be happy.”
Ava forced a smile to her lips. “I’m happy. I have a great life. I have a beautiful little girl and a home I’m paying for with money I earn. What more could I ask for?”
“An adult to share it with. Someone to bump up against at night,” Leslie listed. “Sex?”
“Sex is overrated.”
“Says a woman who hasn’t had it in too many years to count.”
“It’s only been six years,” Ava said. “And I have—”
“—a BOB.” Leslie held up her hand. “Does BOB kiss like Sean?” She crossed her arms over her chest.
Ava’s lips twisted. “No.” Sean had made her vibrator obsolete. In fact, Ava had put BOB in a box in the top of her closet. She’d almost thrown him away. He wasn’t human, he didn’t make her feel the way Sean had made her feel on their one and only date. Leslie had been correct when she’d more or less made it clear that BOB wasn’t a replacement for real, flesh-and-blood male interaction.
Now that she’d been kissed, Ava was afraid there was no going back. She wanted to see Sean again. And she wanted him to kiss her like he had that night.
“He got under your skin,” Leslie said. It wasn’t a question. She could see it as plain as if Ava had told her the fact.
Sean had gotten under Ava’s skin. And she wanted so much more.
The whole situation was a mess. Now that she wanted more, she’d already laid the groundwork for less, insisting to Sean and BODS that she didn’t want a long-term relationship, when in fact, she could imagine such a relationship with a man like Sean.
Damn. She was in way over her head.
“Come on,” Leslie said. “You’re overthinking this. Let’s go spy on your lover.”
“He’s not my lover,” Ava muttered.
“Yet,” Leslie said and stepped out with the confidence of someone who knew she was right.
How did the woman know? Sean might decide to run the other direction once he’d sat in a room full of kindergarten kids.
They entered the school and went directly to the office to sign in.
“Glad you called ahead to allow Sean in for Daddy Day,” the school secretary said, her smile too bright. “He’s so dreamy.”
“Sean?”
The secretary blinked and pulled herself together. “He insisted we call him by his first name. What a sweet man. And Mica was so excited when we called her to the office to escort him back to her room.”
“Thank you. Is it possible to sneak a peek at the class?” Ava asked.
“Certainly.” The secretary made out name tags for them. “They should be having cupcakes and punch right now. Go on back.”
Ave led the way out of the office and down the long hallway.
“Did you find out why Sean doesn’t want a lasting relationship?” Leslie asked.
Ava’s brow dipped. “He didn’t say, but he did tell me that his father wasn’t very loving, and he thought there was a lot to genetics.”
“Is that it?” Leslie shot a glance toward Ava. “He’s afraid he’ll be like his father?”
“I think so.” Ava’s heart hurt for the young Sean. Children needed to know they were loved.
“Tag said he met Sean’s father once, at Sean’s brother’s funeral. Said he was a real son of a bitch.” Leslie clapped her hand over her mouth and looked around.
Thankfully, there weren’t any small children roaming the hallways to hear Leslie’s curse.
“Sean lost a brother?” Ava asked.
“From what Tag said, Sean’s brother committed suicide after leaving active duty.”
Ava’s belly knotted. What a horrible end to a young man’s life. No wonder Sean didn’t want to commit to relationships. With a jerk for a father and a brother who’d ended his own life, where did that leave Sean?
Ava had the sudden urge to hug the man and hold him until all the pain went away. That wasn’t realistic. Nor would Sean want her pity. He was a proud man.
“Here we are,” Ava whispered, as they came to a halt a few steps sh
ort of the open door of Mica’s classroom.
The sound of children laughing and talking came from inside, along with the deeper voices of their daddies.
Ava’s heart swelled and pinched at the same time.
“I shouldn’t spy,” Ava said.
“You can’t get cold feet now,” Leslie muttered.
“I shouldn’t spy, but I’m going to anyway.” She leaned around the corner and peered into the room.
The children were all seated at little tables. Grown men sat on the floor at the tables with their kindergarten students.
Ava picked out Sean, seated at a table in the far corner. Mica sat beside him, drinking punch and smiling so brightly it hurt Ava to watch. She was so happy to have a man show up to Daddy Day.
“Well? What’s happening?” Leslie asked, leaning around Ava to look inside. “Oh, look. Are they all so sweet?” She grinned. “Does a body good to see so many men take an interest in their children’s lives.”
Ava agreed.
Seeing Mica so happy made her reconsider her stance on not bringing another man into her daughter’s life. Even Sean had said that not all men were assholes. Some were very good at accepting children as their own, even if they weren’t of their own blood.
She watched in silence as Sean sat patiently eating cupcakes and drinking punch with Mica. Ava could hear the murmur of Mica’s voice as she talked nonstop.
The man had to be bored out of his mind. But he didn’t show it. He smiled and nodded as if soaking in every word coming out of the child’s mouth.
Ava loved Mica and knew her daughter well. The girl could talk until she was blue in the face. Sometimes, Ava wondered if she ever took a breath.
“Wow, he’s so patient with her,” Leslie noted.
“Yes, he is,” Ava agreed. He was definitely the kind of man a girl could easily fall in love with. What woman could resist a man who rescued kittens and indulged a little girl’s fantasy of having a daddy show up to her school function?
The teacher clapped her hands to get the attention of the children, then asked them to collect all of the trash and bring it to the trash can at the front of the class.
The fathers stood, preparing to leave.
Mica’s smile faded as she stared up at Sean.
He winked at her and bent to give her a big hug.
Mica flung her arms around his neck and hugged hard.
Ava’s throat constricted, and she pressed a hand to her chest. How had she not seen how much Mica wanted a father in her life?
She’d done everything to be both to her daughter, but she wasn’t a father figure and she couldn’t marry a man just to give Mica a father. This one thing she couldn’t do for her daughter, and it made her feel like a failure. She knew the feeling was ridiculous, yet she still felt it.
Sean hugged Mica one more time, nodded to the teacher and thanked her for being a good hostess.
Mica’s young teacher blushed and smiled back at Sean. “Please, come back to visit our class. We’d love to hear all about your life as a Navy SEAL.”
Ava’s hands curled into fists.
Was Mica’s teacher flirting with Sean?
The teacher flipped her hair back over her shoulder, smiled and batted her eyes.
“Did you see that?” Leslie whispered. “Mica’s teacher is coming on to Sean. Oops, we’d better get out of here before we’re caught. The men are headed out.” Leslie stepped back from the doorway.
Ava stood a moment longer, unable to pull her gaze from Sean.
When he turned toward the door, Ava jerked back out of view.
“He’s coming, isn’t he?” Leslie said.
“Yes. Come on.” Ava turned and half-walked and half-ran down the long hallway, sure Sean would see her before she reached the end. And how embarrassing would it be if he caught her spying on him? Too embarrassing!
Leslie eventually caught up with her, breathing hard. “What the hell?”
“I didn’t want him to catch us staring.”
“So, we’re breaking all the rules they make the kids follow by running down the hall?” Leslie chuckled in between breathing. “You’re a case. You know that?”
Ava rounded the corner before she slowed to a walk. “Yes, I’m beginning to think I am.” She turned to Leslie. “I thought I knew what I wanted. Now…I don’t know.”
“I tell you…when you find the one, it changes your world,” Leslie said. Her gaze shifted to the window overlooking the playground. “No one else seems quite right.”
“How do you know?” Ava asked. “And what if he doesn’t feel the same?”
“Honey, you’ll know. Your heart will know. You just have to listen to it.” She frowned. “And if he doesn’t feel the same, you have to have faith that everything will work out in the long run. Some take longer to figure things out than others.”
* * *
“Mica, I have to go to work now,” Sean said as he released his hug on the little girl and straightened. He’d swear he’d seen Ava at the classroom door a moment ago, but when he’d looked again, she wasn’t there. Either that, or he was hallucinating.
The past three nights, he hadn’t slept without dreaming about the blonde with the incredibly blue eyes. In those dreams, she’d worn that impossibly miniscule black dress. And each time, she’d been barefoot. He woke up feeling like she’d been there, close enough to hold, to kiss and to make love with.
Which made him believe he’d really been hallucinating. She had a job and couldn’t afford to miss work, or she wouldn’t have the money to pay the mortgage on her little cottage or hire a plumber to fix the drain.
Sometimes, Sean hated that he made so much money and others didn’t. Granted, he donated a lot of funds to suicide prevention and St. Jude’s Children’s Hospital. He wished he could anonymously donate to Ava and Mica to have their little house fixed up even more. He wondered if it was so old that the wiring was substandard. He worried that it was and would end up burning down.
That led him to worrying about them being inside it if that happened.
When Monday had finally rolled around, Sean was happy to go to Mica’s school to see for himself that she was all right. He liked the little girl and didn’t want anything bad to happen to her or to her mother.
“When will you come see me again?” Mica asked as she walked him toward the door, her hand in his.
Her question reminded him that Ava didn’t want him stringing her along with false expectations.
“I don’t know, Mica. I’m very busy. It might be a while.”
She beamed up at him. “I understand. I’ll be happy whenever you can make it.” The child stopped at the door and stared up at him. “Do you like my mama?”
Sean nodded. “Of course, I do.”
Mica’s grin broadened. “She’s the best.”
“Yes, she is.” He rubbed the top of Mica’s head. “She takes good care of you.”
“I think she likes you, too,” Mica said. “I saw you kissing.” She covered her mouth with her hand and giggled.
Sean’s lips twitched as he fought to hide a smile. The little girl had been spying on them. “Did that bother you?”
She shook her head. “No. People who love each other kiss.”
“You don’t understand…” Sean started.
When Mica stared up at him quizzically, she made him rethink what he was about to say. Sean clamped his lips shut and studied the top of Mica’s head. “Never mind,” he finally said. “I need to go.” He’d have to fade out of Mica’s life. Being direct with the girl would be too hard. He couldn’t stand the thought of making her cry. Or her mother, for that matter.
Sean waved one last time and left the classroom, hurrying down the hallway to the exit. He turned in his visitor’s pass and left the school.
Outside in the Texas sunshine, he drew in a deep breath and let it out.
“Hey, handsome, do you come here often?” a familiar voice said behind him.
Sean spun to face Ava wi
th a smile on her face. Automatically, his hands reached for her, pulled her into his arms and sealed her mouth with his.
Her hands circled the back of his neck and pulled him closer, deepening the kiss.
For a moment, they were suspended in time and space, living, breathing and existing in that kiss.
When Sean finally broke away, he pressed his forehead to hers, his breath ragged. “I missed you.”
She chuckled. “I missed you, too.”
“Were you at Mica’s classroom door a few minutes ago?”
Her cheeks flushed a soft pink. “Yes.”
He closed his eyes, a smile tilting his lips. “Thank God. I thought I was seeing things.” He didn’t tell her he’d been dreaming about her. That might make him sound a little unstable and stalkerish.
“You weren’t.” She leaned back and stared up into his eyes. “Thank you for being there for Mica. I know your being there for Daddy Day made her happier than I’ve seen her in a long time.”
“I kept my promise, but even more than that, I enjoyed it.”
* * *
“You’re kidding, right?” Ava laughed, feeling a little lightheaded with desire. “You know you don’t have to say things you don’t mean just to impress me.”
“I know.” He kissed her again, lightly this time. “I was going to call you today.”
“You were?” She looked up into his eyes.
“We didn’t set a date and time for our second date.”
She smiled. “We didn’t. I was waiting until after Daddy Day to make our arrangements.”
“Did you think I’d change my mind after Daddy Day?”
“The thought crossed my mind,” Ava admitted. “Not many men can take one for the man-team and spend a morning drinking punch and eating cupcakes with a bunch of five-year-olds.”
He puffed out his chest. “I’m stronger than I look.”
She smiled softly. “You look pretty strong to me. A guy doesn’t make it into the Navy SEALs unless he’s strong.”
“And wily.” He winked. “Don’t forget wily. And a team player.”
She laughed. “Name the date and time, and I’ll make up a tuna casserole you won’t forget.”