by Elle James
Then he was gone.
Ava’s intention to call off that evening’s dinner and dancing had been as effective as spitting in the wind. She still had a date, and her date was expecting a home-cooked meal.
Not that she minded cooking, but it meant spending more time with the man she was having difficulty letting go. And she wasn’t sure she had a babysitter for the evening. She didn’t want Mica to get too used to having Sean around. She already had it in her head that he was going to be her new daddy.
Mica took her hand and stared up at her with rounded eyes. “Daddy—Mr. Decker’s coming for dinner?” A smile wreathed her face. She let go of Ava’s hand and clapped hers together, hopping up and down. “Yay! Can we make cupcakes for dessert?”
So much for getting a babysitter for dinner. If she told Mica she couldn’t stay for dinner, the child would be heartbroken.
With a sigh, Ava nodded. “We can make cupcakes. But don’t get used to having Mr. Decker around. He’s a busy man.”
“I know,” Mica said, slipping her hand back in Ava’s. “But he’s having dinner with us tonight. And we’re making cupcakes for dessert.”
Ava and Mica walked back to where she’d parked her car, got in and went to the grocery store for the ingredients for lasagna and cupcakes. She picked up a loaf of French bread and salad ingredients. If she was going to make dinner for her last date, she’d do it right. Afterward, she’d break it to Sean that they couldn’t see each other again.
With a head of iceberg lettuce in her hand, she froze, her heart constricting. She tossed the lettuce into the cart, added leaf spinach, tomatoes and green onions, fighting back tears.
“What’s wrong, Mama?” Mica asked.
“Nothing, sweetie,” she said, her voice catching on a sob. She swallowed hard to hold it back.
Mica reached for her hand. “Why are you crying?”
Ava pasted a smile on her face and pointed to the green onions. “Onions always make me cry.”
“Then why do you get them?”
“I don’t know,” Ava said. “What kind of cake mix do we want for our cupcakes?” she asked, deflecting Mica’s attention from her to dessert.
“Chocolate with strawberry frosting and sprinkles.” Mica skipped ahead to the baked goods aisles and selected the mix, frosting and colorful candy sprinkles. With the dessert ingredients in the cart, they headed for check out and home.
Ava and Mica spent the afternoon cooking, decorating cupcakes and dancing in the kitchen to eighties music. By six-thirty, they had two dozen cupcakes, beautifully decorated, a lasagna, fresh out of the oven and smelling divine, and garlic French bread toasting under the broiler.
Ava had chosen a denim skirt, a plaid blouse knotted at the waist and cowboy boots to wear. She’d pulled her long blond hair up into a messy bun, letting loose tendrils fall down around her ears.
She figured, even if she was going to break up the man, she might as well look good while she did it. Looking your best helped build confidence, right? A lump lodged in her throat. She’d miss seeing him and the anticipation of being together.
Mica had chosen her best pink dress and white patent leather shoes. Ava had French-braided her hair and added a fat pink bow to match her dress.
She hated that her daughter would be sad when Sean didn’t return for more dinners at their little house. Mica and Ava would miss him. But Sean would move on. He was a wealthy man. He would have no trouble finding a willing woman to fill the gap.
Ava’s fingernails dug into her palms. But would that woman know what a find she had in Sean? And by find, it wouldn’t have anything to do with the amount of money he had in his bank account or the number of houses or penthouses he owned.
Sean was rich with good friends, a warm heart and a love for his fellow military veterans. He volunteered with the disabled. Hell, he rescued kittens from highways. Yes, she’d seen the news report of the backed-up traffic and the image of a man holding a small kitten in the middle of a busy highway.
Sean was also kind to fatherless children. Well, he was kind to Mica, anyway. The man hadn’t had to read a book to her the first time they’d met or escort her through the country fair, winning prizes and holding her hand on the Ferris wheel.
He’d make a good dad, despite his concern that he hadn’t been raised that way. Sean had learned from his old man’s mistakes. He wouldn’t repeat them.
Then why was she in such a hurry to ditch him?
Ava retrieved the garlic bread from the oven before she burned it and set it on the counter.
“He’s here! He’s here!” Mica came running into the kitchen, her eyes alight with excitement.
Ava turned off the oven, took Mica’s hand and let her lead her to the front door.
Her love for Mica was the reason she had to break it off with Sean. He’d leave soon enough, when he’d had enough of dating a woman with a small child.
Sean had been clear that he didn’t want to marry. The sooner they stopped seeing each other, the sooner Ava and Mica could start mending their broken hearts.
The doorbell rang as Ava admitted to herself that she would have to work on her own broken heart. For she’d done the worst thing imaginable. She’d fallen in love with a man who wasn’t available.
Mica pulled open the door and flung herself at Sean. “You came!”
He laughed and picked her up in one arm, while holding a bouquet of roses in his other hand. “Of course, I came.” He gave her a loud kiss on her cheek and handed the flowers to Ava. “These are for you.”
Ava took the flowers automatically, still in shock from her internal revelation.
Sean reached into his pocket and pulled out a tiny stuffed purple unicorn. “And this is for you. I figured Reggie would be lonely and in need of a friend.”
Mica took the little unicorn. “Thank you,” she said and hugged Sean so tightly around the neck, Ava worried the man couldn’t breathe.
Sean grinned and inhaled deeply. “Something smells really good.”
“Cupcakes!” Mica said. She wiggled in Sean’s arms until he set her on her feet. Grabbing his hand, she dragged him through the house and into the tiny kitchen. “We made chocolate cupcakes with strawberry frosting and sprinkles just for you.”
“My favorite,” Sean said. “I love sprinkles.”
“I told you he would,” Mica called out to her mother.
Ava buried her face in the roses and breathed in the fragrance, letting it calm her storm of her emotions.
She followed the sound of her daughter talking nonstop to Sean as she showed him the cupcakes, the lasagna, the French bread and the table set neatly with flatware and napkins.
Mica said, “I helped set the table and folded the napkins.”
“You did a wonderful job,” Sean said. He stepped around Mica and took the bouquet of flowers from Ava. “Do you have a vase?”
Ava nodded, suddenly shy with the man she’d made passionate love to the night before. He’d seen her naked, and he acted as if it was as natural as breathing to see her fully clothed again.
Her head spinning with a wild array of thoughts and images of a naked Sean, lying in bed, Ava opened one cabinet door after the other looking for… What was it she was looking for?
Oh, yes. A vase.
Finally, she came across a vase she’d saved from when Leslie and Emma had sent her flowers for her birthday. She filled it halfway full of water and set it on the counter.
Sean joined her in front of the vase and helped her settle the stems in the water, one at a time.
Several times, their hands touched, sending sparks of electricity shooting through her arm into her chest and down to heat her core.
When the last rose was placed in the vase, Ava didn’t trust herself to carry it to the table.
“Let me,” Sean said, his voice a low rumble in her ear, the way it had been the night before when he’d been kissing the side of her neck.
A shiver of awareness rippled across her skin. Ava
quickly stepped away from Sean. She had to keep her distance, or she’d fall under his spell and forget what she had to do at the end of the meal.
Sean carried the flowers to the table and set them at one end, leaving the center for the food.
He returned to the stove to carry the lasagna to the table. Ava brought the salad, and Mica carried the basket of garlic bread.
When everything was on the table, Sean frowned. “I forgot one thing. I’ll be right back.”
He left the kitchen, giving Ava a chance to breathe for a moment.
Mica sniffed the roses. “When a daddy gives a mommy roses, it means he loves her.” She glanced up at Ava and smiled.
Ava’s heart contracted. If only Mica’s statement were true.
Sean reappeared a moment later, carrying what appeared to be a wine bottle. “I thought we could celebrate with a little bubbly.”
Mica clapped her hands. “I like bubbles.”
“None for you, miss,” Ava said.
“Mica can have some. It’s sparkling grape juice. Nonalcoholic. I didn’t want to leave her out of the fun.” He peeled the foil off the top of the cork and popped it open.
Mica squealed and giggled.
“Do you have wine or champagne glasses?” he asked.
Ava shook her head. “No,” she said. “We keep it pretty simple around here. “What you see is our best.” And up against what he had in his penthouse, it was a poor comparison. Ava straightened her shoulders. But it was hers and she was making it on her own, with a child.
“These glasses are perfect,” he said and poured sparkling liquid into the glasses. When he was done, he held Mica’s chair for her and spread her napkin on her lap. Then he held Ava’s.
She took her seat, a flutter of nerves shooting out from where his knuckles brushed her back.
Sean made certain Mica was served first with a square of lasagna, some salad and a piece of the bread before he passed the items to Ava.
She helped herself to the food, wondering how she’d ever swallow any of it. Her throat was so tight, she could barely breathe.
“Would you mind if I said a blessing?” Sean asked.
Ava shook her head. “Please.”
“Let’s hold hands,” he said.
Sean took Mica’s hand and gathered Ava’s in the other.
Her heart beat so fast, she was sure he could feel her pulse in her fingers.
“Lord, please keep our military personnel safe and bring them home unharmed,” he started. “Help the hungry find the food they need, protect the children and guide us in making the decisions that will lead us to happiness.”
Sean’s hand tightened on hers as he made that final statement.
Ava opened her eyes enough to look at the way his fingers curled around hers. Was any of his message directed toward her?
“Bless the food we are about to eat and the people who prepared it. Thank you for all our blessings. Amen.”
Mica and Ava murmured another amen.
Sean held onto her hand a moment longer, before releasing it. “Thank you for sharing your dinner with me,” he said. “I can’t think of two people I’d rather have dinner with more.” He winked at Mica and turned a gentle smile toward Ava. “I mean that.”
Mica leaned toward her mother with her hand cupping her mouth. “See? I was right.”
Sean looked from Mica to Ava and back. “Right about what?”
Ava frowned at Mica.
“Roses mean—”
“That’s enough, Mica. Eat your salad before you eat anything else,” Ava said, her voice a little harsher than she’d intended.
“Roses mean what?” Sean asked.
“Nothing,” Ava said. “Would you like a piece of garlic bread?”
The time was quickly getting near for her to tell Sean they couldn’t see each other again.
Ava couldn’t swallow past the lump in her throat. This dating thing had turned out to be a lot harder than she’d anticipated.
She wished she’d never signed onto the BODS system.
As she stared across the table at Sean, she shook her head. If she hadn’t, she wouldn’t have met Sean, and she wouldn’t have known she could fall in love again.
Chapter 10
Sean accepted the garlic toast and ate the lasagna, smiled and chatted with Mica. All the while, he could sense the tension in the air between himself and Ava.
She didn’t touch her food, and she jumped every time he touched her.
Had he ruined everything by making love to her too soon as Leslie had mentioned?
The night had been incredible…to him. Had it not been as good for Ava? Was she having major regrets?
All Sean knew was that he had to get her past this bump in their dating road. He wanted to see her again. And again. Hell, he wanted her in his life.
His gaze went to little Mica who had tucked her napkin into the collar of her dress to keep from getting marinara sauce on her good clothes.
She was a precious little girl. Any man would be proud to have her as a daughter.
Sean loved that she was happy to see him and that she’d hugged him around the neck so tightly he couldn’t breathe. He could imagine coming home to her every day.
Yeah, she wouldn’t always be so happy to see him, and teenage years would be difficult, but she’d grow into a beautiful young woman like her mother and be a friend, if he played his cards right and loved her as if she were his own. He’d never be mean to a child. He’d seen the damage it had done to him and his brother.
He’d thought they’d worked past it until his brother returned from multiple deployments, got out of the military and returned to the only place he’d known as home. Sean had still been deployed when Patrick had returned, or he might have seen what was happening with his brother.
He might have saved him from the self-loathing spiral he’d fallen into.
By the time Sean got back Stateside, Patrick was deep into drugs. He’d never made the transition back to civilian life. How could he? The only civilian life he’d known was with an abusive father.
Sean had tried to get Patrick the help he’d needed, but his brother had refused. He hadn’t thought he had a problem and had resented Sean’s interference.
Within a week of his return, Sean received a phone call from his father stating Patrick had committed suicide. The old man hadn’t expressed any words of sorrow or regret. Just bald facts. Then, he’d abruptly ended the call.
Sean had attended Patrick’s funeral. His father had not. The call had been the last time he’d heard from his father, and he’d made no attempt to contact him, ever again.
“Do you want a cupcake now?” Mica asked, pulling him out of memories and back to the table with the two young ladies Sean was finding harder and harder to resist.
“I’d love one,” he said. When he started to get up, Mica touched his arm.
“I’ll get them,” she said.
She skipped across the kitchen and took her time to select the best of cupcakes.
Ava leaned forward. “We need to talk.”
Sean forced a smile. “Can we wait until after the cupcakes?”
Mica returned, carrying two. She had icing on her fingers as she handed one to her mother and one to Sean. “I gave you the one with the most sprinkles,” she said with a smile, then turned and ran back to get a cupcake for herself.
Sean made a big show of admiring the cupcake. “This is the most beautiful cupcake I’ve ever seen. Did you put the sprinkles on it?”
Mica nodded and licked the icing off hers, getting a smudge of the pink frosting on her nose. “Me and Mama made them.”
“I believe you’re as sweet as this cupcake,” he said and wiped the frosting off with his napkin. Then he bit into the sweet and moaned. “Mmm. It tastes as good as it looks.”
“Mama says if you cook with love, it will always taste good,” Mica bit into her cupcake.
Sean raised his eyebrows and shot a glance at Ava. “Is that so?”
She shrugged. “My mother used to tell me that. I guess it’s habit.”
Sean turned back to Mica. “I believe there’s a whole lot of love in this cupcake, because it’s delicious.”
Mica giggled and ate another bite of her cupcake.
When Sean had finished his dessert, he helped carry their plates to the sink, making note of the fact Ava didn’t have a dishwasher. “I’ll wash, you dry?” he offered.
“We can leave them in the sink. I’ll wash them later,” she said.
“I insist. I can’t leave you with all these dishes when you did all the cooking.” Sean filled the sink with soapy water and did something he hadn’t done since he’d been a kid. He washed dishes by hand.
Ava sighed, took up a dish towel and dried, putting the plates and cutlery away as she did.
When the kitchen had been set to rights, Ava bent to Mica. “Why don’t you go play in your room for a little while. Mr. Decker and I need a little adult time.”
Mica frowned. “But I want to stay and visit with Mr. Decker.”
Ava didn’t argue. She raised her brow and crossed her arms over her chest.
Mica must have known that look, because her shoulders slumped, and she turned toward the door. She was halfway through the door when she spun and glared at her mother. “Don’t say anything to make him go away.”
Ava blinked, her arms dropping to her sides. “Mica.”
“Promise,” Mica said, tears filling her eyes. “Please.”
Sean wanted to take Mica in his arms and hug the tears away and reassure her that he wasn’t going anywhere. But he couldn’t. Ava held all the cards in this situation. If he didn’t get her approval, he was out.
Ava went to her daughter and pulled her into her arms for a quick hug. “Oh, baby, we’ll talk in a few minutes. Right now, I need to see Mr. Decker alone.”
“Promise,” she whispered.
Ava didn’t. “We’ll talk in a minute.”
Mica stepped out her mother’s arms and went to Sean.
He knelt to wrap his arms around her. “Hey, sweetie.”
“Don’t go away,” she whispered in his ear. “I love you.”