Matteo

by Cassie-Ann L. Miller

  “I’d love to be your friend.” I’m already loving this kid. She’s smart and confident and cuter than a button. I think back to what Matteo told me about her mother. How could any mother walk away from that adorable little face? Amelia’s heart must be made of stone.

  When I rise to my feet, she takes me by the hand. “Come. We play with my toys.”

  Just as I’m about to accept her invitation, two curvaceous women with long dark hair and olive skin round the corner and start down the hall towards us.

  “Anna-Maria – I didn’t know you were here.” Matteo’s eyebrows shoot up as he addresses the taller of the two women and he suddenly seems uneasy.

  Her attention is trained singularly on me. She looks familiar. “Ms. Parker? Wha – ?” She stops herself midsentence and her eyes dart over to Matteo and then back to me. A frown slides over her features.

  “Ellie – you remember my assistant, Anna-Maria.” Oh – that’s how I know her. She was at my first meeting at Cartwright Moretti Stevenson. Now, I understand why she’s not happy to see me. She’s probably figured out that my reason for being at her boss’s apartment at 8:00 p.m. on a Tuesday night is anything but professional.

  “It’s nice to see you again,” I say coolly.

  Don’t make this awkward. Don’t make this awkward.

  “Likewise.” Her tone is curt and frigid.

  Dammit – it’s awkward.

  The other woman glares at me before approaching Tilly. “Mathilda – time to sleep.” Her accent is infused with heavy hints of Spanish.

  “You must be Catalina,” I say as I approach her with my hand outstretched.

  She ignores it. “I put Tilly to sleep,” she says to me as she takes the little girl by the hand.

  Tilly whines and complains for a beat before reluctantly toddling down the hallway with her nanny.

  That leaves Matteo, Anna-Maria and me standing clumsily in the foyer.

  “I’m gonna go,” Anna-Maria says awkwardly as she digs the toe of her shoe into a knot in the floorboard.

  Matt gives her a skittish grin. “I’ll see you at the office tomorrow.”

  “Yes.” She buttons up her jacket as she ambles over to the door. Just as she’s about to step over the threshold she turns back and gives me a forlorn glance. Her eyes are shiny as if tears are about to spill over. “Good night,” she says quietly.

  “Good night,” I say, my voice sounding high-pitched and overly-perky as Matteo closes the door behind her.

  “Take a seat in the living room,” Matteo says quickly before I can question him about the nature of his relationship with his secretary. I know that, technically, it’s none of my business but my curiosity demands an answer. “I’ll be right back.” He leaves me standing in the foyer and disappears into the kitchen.

  I find my way over to the couch and curl up on the cushion, gazing out at the view. I noticed the way Anna-Maria looked at me. I felt Catalina’s hostility towards me. I saw the sheepish expression on Matteo’s face.

  I want to know what’s going on.

  Matteo returns a few minutes later with two beers and a tray of fruit in hand. He lays the tray down on the coffee table before sinking down onto the couch beside me and handing me a bottle of beer.

  I lean close to him and whisper. “What was that all about?”

  “What?” He’s feigning ignorance.

  My eyes roll up to the ceiling. “Please don’t act like you didn’t feel all the tension in this room a few moments ago. What was going on with you, Anna-Maria and Catalina?”

  Matt puffs a breath of air out. “Well, as far as Anna-Maria’s concerned, you shouldn’t be here. You’re a client of the firm’s and seeing you here, she’s probably guessed that we’ve been having sex. She knows it’s against firm policy and I’m gonna get an earful from her tomorrow.”

  I study his face for a moment. I shake my head at him. “No. No. It’s something more,” I press. He gives me a blank look as he turns his beer bottle round and round in his hands. “C’mon Matteo. Spit it out.”

  He sighs again, raking his hand through his thick, dark hair. “Anna-Maria and I have…history.”

  “History? You mean, you fucked her?” I don’t have time to play games. I need him to come clean so I can understand exactly what I’m getting myself into.

  His shoulders slouch forward. “Yes – I fucked her. Okay?”

  “Once?”

  “No. Not once.”

  “So, how many times then?”

  He gives me a steely look. “Don’t ask questions you can’t handle the answers to.”

  A cold chill runs through me. “Should I leave? I feel like I should leave.” I lean over to place the beer on the table.

  Matteo’s hand jumps to mine. “No – you’re not leaving.” His voice comes out in a growl and for some reason that turns me on.

  The possessiveness in his tone. I want to be possessed by him.

  “Look – there were women before you. You know that. But since the day I first saw you, I haven’t laid a finger on anyone else. I can’t look at another woman’s face without comparing it to your beauty. I can’t even think about touching anyone else’s body without aching for yours instead. You’re everything, Ellie. As complicated as this is–“ he gestures to the space between us “you’re everything.”

  My chest tightens. “Please don’t say that. Don’t make this deeper than it has to be.”

  He gives me a soft stare. “Why?”

  Guilt assaults my senses. Matteo is professing deep feelings for me, but he’d probably be singing a very different tune if he knew what I do for a living. “You don’t know me. You know nothing about how I grew up. You’ve never asked me about my work. We’ve barely discussed our families. You don’t know me. We do sex. Hot, amazing, mind-bending sex. But it’s not love. So don’t make it into that.”

  “Ellie…” I see supplication in his eyes.

  The feelings we feel for each other scare me. I don’t want to talk about them. I don’t want to think about them. But I do want to know about Matteo and his nanny.

  “What about Catalina?” I lower my voice and glance down the hallway to ensure that we’re alone. “Did you sleep with her, too? She seemed pretty pissed to see me here.”

  Matteo shrugs and takes a gulp of beer. “She and Anna-Maria are good friends. In fact, Anna-Maria recommended her to me. So, I guess her hostility towards you is a show of female solidarity or something. But, to answer your question – no, I’ve never slept with Catalina.”

  I breathe a sigh of relief. Things would be even more awkward if I had to see Catalina now and then, all while knowing that she fucked Matteo. Some of the tension melts out of my shoulders.

  He looks at me and grins. “So, are you done with the inquisition yet? ‘Cause if so, I’d like for you to come sit close to me.”

  I sigh, expelling frustration from my body. As much as I know I should resist him, I want to be close to him and pretend that my secrets don’t exist. “Feeling cuddly tonight?” I say with a small smile.

  “I do actually.” His face is much more serious than I expected. “Really, I just want to hold you, Ellie…I want to feel you next to me tonight.”

  That tugs at my heart. I smile as I scoot closer to him on the couch. He drapes his arms around my shoulders and buries his nose in my hair.

  “This is nice,” he mutters, half to himself.

  I nod in agreement. “It is.”

  If it wasn’t for the guilt niggling at my conscience, I’d really enjoy this. My brain tells me that now is as good a time as any to tell Matteo about my involvement with the New York Flame but the selfish part of me wants to savor this moment while it lasts. Because, despite the way Matteo claims to feel about me, his heart will do a complete 180o once I reveal my secret to him…And, honestly – I don’t want to lose this.

  I snuggle closer to him, greedily lapping up the moment.

  “Now, I have a question for you,” he says, his voice low and in
timate.

  My pulse quickens and my stomach churns nervously. “Yes?”

  “Why won’t you call me ‘Matt’ like everyone else does?”

  I think about it for a moment, and then I say, “I like calling you ‘Matteo’. It reminds me that the real you is different from the ‘you’ that the rest of the world thinks it knows.”

  His lips brush against my temple. “Different how?”

  “You’re…complex.”

  He chuckles. “Complex?”

  “Under all those layers of arrogance and aloofness, you’re passionate. You’re strong but vulnerable. You’re guarded and fiercely protective of those you love, but you have a soft spot of your own.”

  He’s silent for a while and I hope I haven’t offended him. Then, he says, “I like it when you call me ‘Matteo’. I like how my name sounds on your lips.”

  His confession warms me all over and for just a moment, all my defenses slip away. “I like who I become whenever you’re around,” I whisper. And immediately, I wish I could take the words back. “Does that make me sound weak?” I ask bashfully. I can’t be weak. ‘Weak’ is not an option for me.

  His hand cups my face and he looks me deep in the eyes. “You’re the strongest woman I know, Ellie Parker.”

  I press my cheek to his chest and smile. I want to believe that he means the things he’s saying. I never expected to feel this way for him.

  He sighs deeply. “I would invite you to spend the night, but Tilly tends to climb into my bed at all hours of the night.”

  I smile softly at the thought of Matteo’s adorable little girl. “I understand,” I say quietly. “Let’s just enjoy this moment. Let’s think about nothing else.”

  Laying there in his arms, it’s the first time in a long time I feel like I’m exactly where I belong.

  Chapter 25

  I walk down the corridor of Cartwright Moretti Stevenson the next morning feeling reinvigorated. I slept like a goddamned baby after my driver took Ellie home last night and now, I can’t fight the smile that’s tickling at my lips.

  I don’t even recognize myself.

  I don’t know what’s happening to me.

  I’m not the kind of guy who gets off on just spending time with a woman. I’ve never spent hours and hours just quietly holding a woman in my arms. But that’s what I did with Ellie last night and – though I was hard as nails for most of our time together – holding her was enough.

  Anna-Maria eyes me cautiously as I approach her cubicle.

  Shit – she’s probably still upset about seeing me with Ellie last night. I never wanted to hurt her. I can count on one hand the names of the women that I’ve ever really cared about and Anna-Maria is one of them.

  She’s always been so loyal to me. She’s always been more than just my secretary.

  No – I’ve never loved her, but that’s not her fault. It’s not because of anything she ever did wrong. It’s just that I was never ‘wired’ for love…until Ellie. I don’t want things between Anna-Maria and me to become strained. I hope it’s not too late. I’ll do what I must to preserve our friendship.

  I’ve hurt people. Anna-Maria is one of them. And I feel like shit for that.

  “Good morning, Anna-Maria,” I say coming to a stop opposite her desk. “About last night, I just want to let you know – “

  “Shhh!” she says in an irritated whisper, her eyes darting just past my office door. “Madison’s here. And she’s pissed. About something. She’s been waiting for you for like 25 minutes and there was nothing I could say to make her leave.”

  My eyebrows furrow. I hate it when my little sister is upset. My siblings and I have always been extremely protective of each other. It’s always been us against the world. We’re the Morettis – that’s how we were brought up. So, if someone did something to hurt my sister, I’m ready to fight them – no questions asked.

  I’m already grimacing, my fists balled up at my sides. I ask Anna-Maria, “Did she say why she’s upset?”

  Anna-Maria shakes her head. “No – but I think it’s you she’s mad at.”

  “Me?” I haven’t done a thing to her. I haven’t even spoken to her in a few days, come to think about it.

  “Yes – she was going on and on about you being a selfish asshole –“ and then she adds under her breath “—and I happen to agree today.”

  I ignore Anna-Maria’s passive aggressive behavior. She and I will sort through our differences later. For now, I need to figure out what has Madison all riled up.

  “Hold my calls,” I toss over my shoulder as I brush past Anna-Maria and enter my office.

  Madison is standing by the window, looking out over Union Square. One hand is anchored on her waist and a snifter of scotch dangles from the fingers of her other hand.

  My sister. Drinking. Before 10 a.m.

  This is bad.

  “Maddie, what’s going on?” I say as I close the door behind me.

  She spins around and glares at me. “Well, you’re late this morning,” she seethes. “Is it because you were recuperating. From. Fucking. Ellie. Parker. All. Night. Long?”

  Whoa! I definitely didn’t see that coming.

  I remain calm. I’ll play it cool and see just how much she knows. “Madison – what exactly are you talking about?”

  “Don’t insult me, Matt. You’ve been fucking Ellie Parker. I know it. I saw you with her at the Waldorf last week. I saw you booking a room with her.” She spits the words out at me and they’re covered in vile.

  I sigh. “So, what’s it to you if I’m involved with her?” I say nonchalantly as I pad over to the mini-bar to pour myself a drink. I need to keep my back to her so that she doesn’t read my face. I need to buy myself some time to analyze the gravity of the situation. If she’s already told Michael about this, then I can forget about getting that promotion to managing partner of the firm. If she hasn’t told Michael yet, maybe I can reason with her.

  She marches right up beside me. “What’s it to me?” she throws my words back at me. “Matt – do you even know who that woman is?”

  I throw her a disinterested sidelong glance. “Yes – I know who she is. Yes – I know she’s a client of the firm’s and I violated firm policy by sleeping with her –“

  My sister hocks a bitter laugh. “Fuck firm policy, Matt. That’s not even what I’m talking about. This is much bigger than firm fucking policy.”

  I roll my eyes. I love my sister but Madison has a tendency to be a tad dramatic. “Maddie – get to the point. Please. I have work to do.”

  “When I first realized you were sleeping with one of the firm’s clients again, Domenic convinced me to let it go. He said to me ‘Matt will be Matt. The policy has never deterred him from fucking whoever the hell he wants to fuck, so don’t go making a big deal about it.’ And I listened to him. I dropped it. But then, Michael was preparing to send the New York Flame a cease and desist letter yesterday, ordering them to stop publishing trash about my personal life and one of the interns stumbled upon an interesting little tidbit–”

  I turn to face her, furrowing my brows. “What are you talking about?”

  “Ellie Parker – she’s Eloise Benoit. Do you have any fucking idea who Eloise Benoit is?”

  I shake my head slowly. The name rings a bell but I’m not sure why.

  “Eloise Benoit is the founder of the New York Flame, that dirty, salacious tabloid magazine that’s been dragging the Moretti name through the mud for years.”

  Chapter 26

  From the moment he stepped through the door tonight, I could tell that something was off.

  He seemed cold. Distant.

  He didn’t try to kiss me or even touch me. He had no gentle words to whisper into my ear. He just took a seat at the kitchen table and watched wordlessly as I finished preparing dinner. I could feel his eyes on me as my back was turned to him, but he wasn’t ‘checking me out’ – he was analyzing me and it made me pretty freaking uncomfortable.

  �
��Are you sure you don’t want anything to eat?” I ask him as I set my bowl of rice, vegetables and chicken down on the table in front of me.

  “No,” he says curtly, his mouth pulled into a tight line.

  “Water? Juice?”

  “Are you Eloise Benoit?” The words shoot out of his mouth.

  My jaw goes slack.

  I search my brain for words but I don’t find any.

  This is the last thing I expected Matteo to ask me.