The large stone wall covered a stone house with a red clay roof. When she brought them inside, the house was all Belisarus and there was no trace of her. The living quarters had a desk with several melted candles and it was covered in parchment. Esylle wandered over to read it, but there was no writing. He must have stopped writing after she left because he was too ill. There were books everywhere and no toys or anything she would have played with as a child.
“Belisarus slept through there and my chamber is through the other door. There’s not enough beds here for everyone, but I need to sleep before I fly us back. If you don’t want to sleep on the floor, when I was leaving I saw an inn a few doors down, but they want human coin for you to stay there. There may be some here if you look. I don’t know what else is out there because I was never allowed to leave.”
“If you light a fire, I’ll sleep in front of it as a dog,” Terros said. She had a fire lit before he was done speaking and he went to curl up to sleep. Esylle was surprised when her father joined him as a dog.
“You can both fit in Belisarus’ bed if you don’t mind sleeping next to each other,” Lisana told Fluvis and Volaris.
They made a move to leave and Esylle followed her into her bedroom, not only because she wanted to see it, she wasn’t sure where she was supposed to sleep. When Leodos didn’t follow, she stuck her head out the door and told him it would be a tight fit, but there was room for the three of them and Frog usually slept with her.
They both looked around her bedroom and Esylle couldn’t help but notice all of the drawings that were nailed to the walls. When she looked around, she saw the creature she became underwater, the serpent, and the bird she became while delivering her message. She had become almost exact replicas of the drawings on the wall. She walked around the room gazing at all the drawings. Some were creatures from stories she knew from being a child and some looked like they must be from tribal myths. They were all very good and she asked Lisana where she got them. Belisarus didn’t draw and if he needed to sketch something to teach Esylle, they were always very crude and not this level of skill.
Lisana looked shy again. “There wasn’t much for me to do after my lessons. If Frog and I didn’t sit and talk, I would draw things from the stories he told or play my flute. He stopped telling me stories after I made Frog, even though I would beg.”
“I don’t see any toys here. Did he give them away when you were older?” Esylle asked, not sure if she wanted the answer.
“I didn’t have any,” she said, sitting on the bed. Esylle could feel sadness from her that she was fighting them from feeling, but it was too strong. “He played games with me and held me in his lap to read stories to me when I was young in addition to trying to teach me. He tried to make his lessons fun then. When I learned to read, the games stopped. After that, he wouldn’t hold me in his lap to tell me stories because he said I was too old. He would come and sit at my bedside and tell me while I fell asleep. When I created Frog, he refused to tell me any more stories. He was angry with me for changing him and demanded I make him a frog again. When I couldn’t, he told me I lived too much in my head with the stories he told me. He was cruel and told me none of them were real and it was the only way he could get me to behave. He was only hard on me with my lessons after that.
“He knew I liked the stories and I was in here drawing. Sometimes he would just leave without saying anything and sometimes he would make me stop and go outside with Frog and my flute. I never understood until recently why he always told me the flute was more important than drawing. I don’t understand why he stopped telling me stories if he knew it was one of the few things that made me happy here and the things I heard in them was how I ended this without hurting anyone.”
“I think he-”
“I don’t want to hear any more theories about why he treated me the way he did. I thought I wanted to come back here when this was over, but now that I’m back in this house, I don’t want to be here. I thought I belonged here, but I don’t belong anywhere still.”
Esylle sat next to her and pulled her head down to her shoulder. She didn’t pull away and relaxed. Leodos sat on the other side of her and rubbed her back. “Your place is with Leodos and I. I would hope you know this by now. We’re both like you now, so you shouldn’t feel like you are different and strange from us anymore.”
“You’re not completely like me.”
“Close enough,” Leodos told her. “Esylle took me flying and the way we both feel when we fly is how I think you feel when you run. Esylle and those three boys all took me to experience what you can do. It all feels amazing. I don’t know why he let you go so long thinking it was bad instead of just letting you enjoy it.”
“I don’t want to talk about Belisarus anymore. I want to go to sleep and leave this place in the morning,” she said, shaking them both loose and moving like she was going to get into bed.
Esylle wasn’t sure if she could make this better, but she tried. “You’re coming back with us. You can feel that Leodos and I love you. All three of those boys love you enough to share you when you announced your choice. You belong with us, where we all love you.”
“I just want to sleep.”
Leodos crawled into bed next to her and pulled her to him like he always did. Esylle could feel her as the tension she had been holding onto since they got here left her. Esylle couldn’t sleep and said she would join them later. She went out to the living quarters in search of anything Belisarus might have left to give Lisana an answer about why he raised her the way he did. Esylle wanted that answer too.
She went back to the desk of blank parchment and started looking at the stacked books there. She was surprised to find one, buried in the very back, under three other books, that had her name etched in gold leaf on the spine. It was a large tome and she pulled it from the other books and flipped through the pages. They were all handwritten. She opened it to the first page and recognized Belisarus’ handwriting.
“Esylle,
“I know you missed much when I took Lisana. I’m hoping you are here now and found this journal. I hope she learned she needed to end this where it started and brought you here. I meant to give this to you when she brought you here, but I couldn’t hold on long enough.
“I’m sure you have questions she can’t answer and I hope this journal gives them to you. I stayed up every night after she slept, since the moment I arrived here, journaling her growth. This diary starts from the night I took her to the day she left to find you again. I hope it fills in the blanks, for both of you.
“I regretting taking her and telling you nothing. Rivannus would not have allowed me to take her and I thought if I said something to you, that you would not either. She would have been in danger if she stayed while she was still young. If any of the Lords had watched her heal or any of the tribes found out about her, you would have lost her in worse ways than me taking her.
“Don’t read this now. Bring it back with you and read it once you are back in the palace. She still has much left to do if she’s done what I think she’s done. What she needs to do now will sap her energy and she needs to learn from you to be a queen. Teach her and read after.
“Belisarus”
She wanted to stay up all night reading. She wanted to know how he managed to take her from a locked room without Rivannus sensing him, now that she knew he was part Theran and part Tark. She wanted to read about her child growing up since she didn’t get to see any of it. She wanted answers for Lisana too after hearing her tonight. Every time Esylle brought up Belisarus, now that they knew he was her grandfather, she never wanted to talk about it. Esylle thought she might when she was ready, like everything else. She wanted to have answers for her when she was ready to talk and those answers might be in this diary.
As much as she didn’t want to, she brought the diary into Lisana’s bedroom, put it to the side, and got into bed with Leodos and her daughter. Lisana was in the deep sleep Esylle had gotten to know since she connect
ed them and she allowed them to hold her while she slept. She didn’t know if she would allow it once they got back to Inanos because the dreams might not come to her then. She knew she wouldn’t be able to after she was wed and she still didn’t want to think about her in bed with those three boys.
Lisana sighed and relaxed into her neck when Esylle pulled her as close to her as she could with Leodos already holding her. She could feel she was at peace right now, but being here upset Esylle too. If Belisarus had to take her and not tell her he was her grandfather, why couldn’t he give her toys to play with? If she liked his stories so much that she drew them, he shouldn’t have refused to tell them to her anymore. Esylle didn’t understand why she kept saying she wanted to come back here this entire time instead of coming back to her rightful home if nothing here made her happy.
She tried as hard as she could to sleep, but she was restless and had too many dark thoughts in her head. She knew she needed to rest if Lisana intended to fly them back the same way because it was a rough ride and she spent the entire first one clutching Leodos’ waist and worried she would fall off. She managed to finally fall asleep shortly before everyone was waking and it was time to leave.
Sono
Sono was trying to enjoy his breakfast at the stone table with Neptis, but Oris didn’t seem to want to let them eat in peace. Now that the three of them were on friendlier terms, they were all talking like they used to. Oris was gesturing wildly over his food and wondering if they would come back today. Oris liked to watch her on the beach while she was teaching everyone what they needed to do. Sono saw a little, then couldn’t bear watching anymore. He saw the arrows melt before they even came close to hitting her, but he could feel what it was doing to her to melt them and he didn’t like watching her being shot at. After the first day, he avoided the beach and only tried to be there for her after Leodos carried her back inside.
Oris seemed convinced everything on Idric had gone as she said it would and he just wanted her back with him. He kept asking them if they thought she would allow one of their fathers to marry them when she got back. Sono trusted her and thought she could do what she said she would, but had no idea if they would have to find another way to get back because she was too weak to get them back to Inanos. Oris told them about the winged serpent she had become like he was so proud of her. Sono didn’t see, but he was close enough to her to feel that it hurt her.
He knew if he had to watch Leodos carry her back in when they returned, he wouldn’t be able to get near her. They would carry her back to her chambers and Leodos and Esylle would stay with her until she was ready to wake up. His father and the rest of the kings might fill everyone in while she was sleeping as to what happened on Idric. They had just finished breakfast when Voxis burst into the room.
“I’ve been flying over the sea keeping an eye out for them. She’s on her way back. I can see the winged serpent in the distance. She should be here soon. From what I can tell, I can make out several people on her back. I don’t think we lost anyone.”
Oris and Neptis abandoned their breakfast and ran outside. Sono got up slowly and walked out to the beach. He had to warm himself as soon as his feet hit the sand because it was colder now than it was before she left. He didn’t see how Voxis kept wanting to keep watch in the air when he couldn’t warm himself like those she had gifted.
Sono put his hand over his eyes to block the sun and the sand that the wind kicked up. When he looked hard enough, he could make out a spot in the sky that seemed to be coming closer. He stepped back, straight into Neptis, when he finally saw her. Oris described this to them in more detail than he thought was needed at the time, but seeing the serpent up close was frightening.
When she finally landed, everyone on her back gingerly slid off. The entire beach was now full of tribe members wanting answers, but none of them wanted to get close to her because this was a form unknown to them. He didn’t want to feel her in pain again and was surprised to watch her change back into a girl the way should would if she was just a simple falcon. Even though she was the girl they knew again, everyone stayed away from her.
Sono saw her stumble. He could feel she was weak, but he also felt she was blocking them from trying to feel something again. Leodos was closer to her and held her up. Sono was on them in seconds, slipping under her other arm. She didn’t look at him the way she normally did when he came near her. She was upset about something and pushing it away, both so she could ignore it and they couldn’t feel her. He had spent enough time with her to know that look on her face.
Everyone swarmed about the kings for answers, but Sono didn’t stay to hear. Neptis watched them leave like he wanted to come with them and Oris stayed, waving his arms at his father, demanding to know how she saved them all. Sono thought he should have waited and made sure she was okay.
When they finally got to her chambers, she didn’t go to bed like she needed to sleep again. She shook both of them off her like she didn’t want them touching her and sat in one of the chairs. She rested her head on her hand and just looked weary. Despite all their time talking, he didn’t think she would tell him what was bothering her.
“We need to start moving everyone back to the palace. I told the Lords we would meet them there. They will get there first with their boat and prepare anyone who wasn’t at Idric for what comes next.”
He could feel a sadness bubble up that she couldn’t push down. He could feel her trying and then he felt nothing from her again. He started to wonder if she had to kill someone at Idric and that was what was wrong with her. He thought Esylle would speak first, but Leodos did.
“Surely after what you just did, you can rest a day. Are you going to tell us what’s bothering you? You’ve been trying to block us from feeling you since we got to your house.”
“When the Lords tell the other humans what is meant to happen, they are going to need to see me. I need to change those that need to be changed. We need to start the journey back.”
“I know what is bothering you,” Esylle said gently. “I just don’t know why you refuse to talk about Belisarus when any of us ask you to. I found his journal. He wrote about you every night from the moment he took you, while you were sleeping. I haven’t read it yet, but I think it has answers we both want.”
Sono expected to feel heat from her as she got angry with Esylle again. He was surprised when he felt nothing from her and she simply stood up and walked out of the room. Leodos and Esylle both moved to go after her and Sono asked them to let him try. Neither of them wanted to, but he managed to convince them after a few minutes of arguing.
When he went into the hallway, she was gone and he couldn’t find her. He could feel a faint bitterness she couldn’t push down, but it still couldn’t see her. If he could feel her, she was close. When he felt a surge of energy she couldn’t block that the light had refreshed her from her journey, he knew she was close and something small. She wasn’t trained to spy like any of the Farkhi, but she told him when they were gathering food that she first entered the palace to see Esylle and how to approach her as a gnat. She must have made herself something too small for him to see. He changed into a hawk, where his vision was much better and he could see her.
He could make out the fluttering of small, whispery wings and made a move to follow her. She must have known he was following her and was gaining on her quickly since his wings were more powerful. He lost her again as she flew into the open sky where the garden was. She became something else too small to see and he lost her in all the overgrown vegetation.
He changed back so he could talk to her, since he knew he would never find her now. “Soryn, if you’re upset, please come out so I can make it better. If going back home upset you, I would hope you know you can talk to any of us about it.” He paused, hoping she would come out and tell him what was wrong. She had stopped leaving to be alone for so long, he thought she trusted them now. When she didn’t come out, he tried pleading with her. “I thought you could feel now tha
t we love you and just want to make it better for you. Please at least let me try to make you feel better.”
He must have stood and pleaded with vegetables for ages with no response before he smelled something with his new sense of smell behind him. When he turned, it was Frog. He told Sono Esylle had been watching him try to get her to come out and asked Frog to come try to talk to her. She thought he might be the only one she would talk to right now.
She must have heard Frog because she finally appeared in the middle of the squash, covered in dirt. He wanted to go to her when he saw mud streaked down her face because she had been crying, but Frog put his small arm on his chest and told him it just needed to be the two of them, like it used to.
She bowed her head so that her hair was covering her face and didn’t even look at him when she left with Frog. Sono was disturbed that she wouldn’t talk to neither her mother and Leodos, nor him after everything that had happened between them. He let them leave because she knew Frog better than anyone here and she would at least talk to him.
He didn’t follow and tried to go back to her chambers to talk to her mother. When he asked, he was told she didn’t have to harm anyone while they were on Idric. They filled him in on what transpired on Idric and he was too worried about her to be happy about it. Esylle was wringing her hands and even though Leodos was trying to make her feel better, Sono could tell he was worried too.
Esylle finally turned to Sono and asked him if she ever talked about Belisarus with him. Esylle thought that was what was bothering her and told him everything she said in her bedroom. She only discussed Belisarus with him when she first got her raven and they were interrupted.
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